Daycare Switching Rooms Question - Am I Being Nuts?

Jenny935 · November 2013

I'm being told that DS (almost 9 mo) is going to start being transitioned up to the next room at daycare. (He's currently in Infant 2 out of 4, they break down in to approximately 6 month chunks.) If I felt like it was a natural transition, I would be fine with it. But the next room up is all 12-18 month year olds who are totally mobile. When I picked him up Tuesday on his 'visit the big kids day,' he was being held and the other 5 were all running around. DS can sit, but can't even army crawl yet. Then on Wednesday, his sheet indicated that he started in his regular room, spent most of the afternoon in the big kid room, but then went to the room younger than his usual one for the later afternoon.

DS started in his current room at 5 months instead of 6 like most of the others just because he started Daycare at that age and they didn't see the point in transitioning him after just a few weeks. So he's been there longer than the others except for one. However, he's the only non mobile one. One girl can walk. At first I was led to believe he was just visiting on Tuesday and all the older ones are taking a turn. But yesterday I asked the director for some clarification on what's up with his placement, since I found him in 3 different places this week. She said he's the next one who is moving up. I'm annoyed about this because even if he's been in his room the longest, he's totally the 'babiest' and I don't want him with these huge kids who are in an entirely different developmental stage. Plus, if he's the most ready for the big kid room, why did he spend 2 afternoons in the baby room this week?

Am I being nuts? I wanted to talk to the lead teacher about the situation on Friday before we left for Thanksgiving, but she was already gone so I stopped in to see the director. She just made me more annoyed because she didn't give me any kid of straight answers. How should I approach this? I don't want to be psycho mom (I'm a teacher - so I am trying to be sensitive to those who aren't the decision makers and just take care of the kids!) but at the same time, I don't think it's right for him to have to move up and be totally out of place and have a walker left behind in the little kid room.

This is the kind of stuff I totally thought would roll off my shoulders and is seriously ticking me off.

daisy662 · November 2013

We dealt with almost the same thing. I believe what happened in our case was that they didn't have enough kids for a full transition room all days, only like 3 days per week. So, some days he was in the infant room and other days the transition room. It was a little annoying at first, but I found that even though I felt he went into the transition room a few months early, he began to learn much more being around those kids that were a few months older. In the end it was fine. I know how you feel because I was very concerned at first also but in the end, it was totally fine.

emberlee3 · November 2013

It sounds like this transition is more for the convenience of the center than for your child. On the other hand, it's not that big of a deal--it's good for children to be around different ages, it's pretty much how humans evolved. Age-restricted classrooms are a fairly new development in society, KWIM? Your LO will learn from the bigger kids. So, I think if you like the center as a whole, everything will work out fine.

MNgirl326 · November 2013

LO moved up to the middle infants room when he was about that age- he could kind of sit but that was it.

I was nervous at first, but it went fine. Pretty quickly after moving up he started rolling. THen rolloing went to crawling, then cruusing. He started walking right around 11 months. its amazing, it seems like there is such a difference between the milestones, but in a matter of a couple months LO made huge leaps.

The teachers were pretty good about keeping him to area where the others couldn't get to him. Or putting him in jumperoos or excersaucers. Or just moving the others way when he was playing on the floor. It worked out just fine.

mittensonkittens · November 2013

My oldest always moved rooms early because there was a big group of kids a few months younger than him, and they moved him early to make room. I freaked out the first time, but it was fine. It was always fine. The difference between mobile and non mobile babies seems bigger than it really is. I'm sure he'll have a great time with the older babies. I figured it was better for my son to be the youngest in the class than the oldest because he could learn more from the other kids. And he got more attention because he wasn't as mobile.

ccam · November 2013

It will work eventually. Your LO will catch up and it will all be fine. But if you aren't comfortable with the move, I would speak with the director. Our center seems to do the same - they make moves that work best for them. Right now, DS is stuck in a room with younger kids only because the room above him has kids waiting to move up. Its all about timing. It sucks but kind of sounds like the norm.

ridesbuttons · November 2013

The way I look at it, it is very natural for kids to be around kids of different ages. If they were home with siblings, the siblings would be older or younger but not likely exactly the same age.

I'd let them move him up.

Jenny935 · November 2013

Thanks, ladies.

I think I know in my heart it'll be fine - I mean, if he was home with me and I had more than one kid he wouldn't be with others his size! I guess I just feel annoyed because like many of you said - it's pretty obvious they're doing this because it's best for them and not best for him. I'm also confused why the walker isn't the one going, but it is what it is. He's a very happy and content kid, and know that he'll be fine anywhere...and they know him, so they probably know that too. Perhaps that went into the decision. Thanks for sharing your experiences!

laurakaz13 · November 2013

One of the requirements to move to the 1-2 yr old room at DD's daycare is being able to walk. DD was walking at 10 months, crawling at 6, so she was ready at about 11 months. She wasn't moved until 1 though, which worked for us.

It doesn't sound like your DS is ready yet, especially since he is not mobile yet. I would not be happy with this either. He belongs in the baby room a bit longer, in my opinion. Can you talk to the director?

traveltheworld · November 2013

I would be annoyed too. I hated it when DS had to move rooms - he was also the "babiest" of the kids in his old room so I didn't see why he had to move first. But it turned out fine. At this age the kids don't play with each other, so generally there isn't much of a problem. I actually think moving rooms helped motivate DS to be mobile faster. I know it's hard. Good luck!

PseudoMama · November 2013

It seems like they are moving him up to make room (maybe they had a spot open up in the 12-18 month room but only have waiting list in the infant room). I would ask why he's being moved off-track. At our daycare they move all the same kids all at the same time, which is usually in the fall.

cedenton · November 2013

So they want to move your non mobile 9 mo old into the 12-18 mo room? Nope. Not appropriate.

At his old daycare DS moved up at 12 mos to the 12-24 mos room. At his new daycare he's moving up at 15 months to the 16-??? (potty trained) room.

I don't think it's weird that he's been in both rooms throughout the day as that is usually how they try to ease the transition. I would not be okay with him being in the mobile room at his age and developmental level, though.

So...I wrote all of the above and then realized that my 15 month old at his new daycare is currently in the infant room with 6wks -16 months. Ha. BUT I would prefer, and I think it's better for the kids, that there was one more room in between the infant and the one he's about to transition to. Since your daycare actually does have it chunked more I don't understand why they want to push him up.

mommymegan831 · November 2013

When I orginially read your posts I agreed with you and wouldn't have liked the idea of my LO being put in the class with bigger kids, but after all the posts saying it wasn't a big deal, I thought maybe I'm wrong. Well, I've thought about it more and I don't like the idea. Yes, kids learn from older ones, my 1 year old is copies everything my 3 year old does, but I can watch both my kids and make sure DD doesn't hurt DS. I think the daycare ratio is 6 to 1 at that age. I could see where the care givers attention is on something the older mobile ones are doing while your LO gets hurt or into trouble. I also really don't like how often your daycare transitions kids. Most daycare's 1st room goes up to 18 months, plus since your LO has only been there 4 months it seems too soon to switch him already.

I get a little freaked out when my DD changed rooms, and I also thought she might have been struggling when we started a new daycare and a 3 1/2 she was put in a room with kids turning 5. The directors would have let me bring her down, but after seeing how things went for a little bit it worked out just fine.

SunAndRain · November 2013

DD is in extended care and I love that she spends time with older kids every single day. Oh I'm sure she got tripped over and stepped on by the bigger toddlers. Especially before she started walking. But I have to say the bigger kids dote all over her and she is a tough little kid. I was more concerned about them trying to transition her from two to one nap per day before she was ready; but she pretty much took control of THAT situation by dragging her own mat out and taking a midmorning cat nap. So I think it is fine to put kids in an environment that challenges them developmentally so long as it is safe and within reason. Life doesn't cater to our every need. Some discomfort is ok IMO

emberlee3 · November 2013

PP's point about ratios got me thinking: how do they plan to maintain ratio if he moves up before 12 months? In my state, the ratio must be based on the youngest child in the room, so any room with an infant under 12 months must be 1:4, even if the other children are older (obviously short visits are exceptions). It wouldn't make sense to move a child younger than 12 months to a 12-24 month room, because they'd have to add a teacher.

MNgirl326 · November 2013

emberlee3 said:

PP's point about ratios got me thinking: how do they plan to maintain ratio if he moves up before 12 months? In my state, the ratio must be based on the youngest child in the room, so any room with an infant under 12 months must be 1:4, even if the other children are older (obviously short visits are exceptions). It wouldn't make sense to move a child younger than 12 months to a 12-24 month room, because they'd have to add a teacher.

They have float teachers on staff for this. They know their busiest time of the day and make sure they are staffed in ratio for that, and then when kids start getting picked up and they start sending staff home, they have float teachers to make sure they are always in ratio if a teacher needs to leave. They also balance numbers by sending younger kids to older rooms to "visit" when ratios are a little off. Or for that matter sending younger kids to younger rooms to visit for awhile. Chances are, if your child is the next one to move up, he has already "visited" before and he has done just fine.

Also, this really, really isn't that big of deal. I promise. Looking back at LO's experience at a daycare center over the last 3 1/2 years, they really do know what they are doing and things always worked out best when I unclenched and trusted them a little more. They know how to balance numbers, they know when to move kids up and they know how to make sure all the kids needs are being met. That is their jobs. I know it is scary to think of tiny un mobile baby with mobile 12 month babes. But I PROMISE it works out. The staff knows how to handle it.

I know it is easy to say, they are just doing it for them, and they aren't keeping the kids best interest at heart, but do you HONESTLY think that? If so, then you need to find a different daycare. You need to find a place you where you can trust, and where you feel confident in their decisions. Yes, its a business. They need to continually move kids up so they can continually bring more kids in. That's business, but if they didn't ultimately have the kids interest at heart, They WOULDN"T have a business.

Talk to the director. Let her know your concerns and have a conversation about it. Talk to the teachers in the next room. Let them tell you how they handle things. And then take a deep breath. I promise it will be okay.

.

emberlee3 · November 2013

abartow said:

emberlee3 said:

PP's point about ratios got me thinking: how do they plan to maintain ratio if he moves up before 12 months? In my state, the ratio must be based on the youngest child in the room, so any room with an infant under 12 months must be 1:4, even if the other children are older (obviously short visits are exceptions). It wouldn't make sense to move a child younger than 12 months to a 12-24 month room, because they'd have to add a teacher.

They have float teachers on staff for this. They know their busiest time of the day and make sure they are staffed in ratio for that, and then when kids start getting picked up and they start sending staff home, they have float teachers to make sure they are always in ratio if a teacher needs to leave. They also balance numbers by sending younger kids to older rooms to "visit" when ratios are a little off. Or for that matter sending younger kids to younger rooms to visit for awhile. Chances are, if your child is the next one to move up, he has already "visited" before and he has done just fine.
Also, this really, really isn't that big of deal. I promise. Looking back at LO's experience at a daycare center over the last 3 1/2 years, they really do know what they are doing and things always worked out best when I unclenched and trusted them a little more.   They know how to balance numbers, they know when to move kids up and they know how to make sure all the kids needs are being met. That is their jobs. I know it is scary to think of tiny un mobile baby with mobile 12 month babes. But I PROMISE it works out. The staff knows how to handle it.
I know it is easy to say, they are just doing it for them, and they aren't keeping the kids best interest at heart, but do you HONESTLY think that? If so, then you need to find a different daycare.   You need to find a place you where you can trust, and where you feel confident in their decisions.    Yes, its a business. They need to continually move kids up so they can continually bring more kids in. That's business, but if they didn't ultimately have the kids interest at heart, They WOULDN"T have a business.
Talk to the director. Let her know your concerns and have a conversation about it. Talk to the teachers in the next room.   Let them tell you how they handle things. And then take a deep breath. I promise it will be okay.
.

Um, how about you take a deep breath? I'm not the OP. My kids are in mixed age classrooms because I purposely chose that. My daughter is in a classroom that is 6 weeks to 2.5 years. DS is in 2.5 years to preK. I love the school, I love daycare. I am just asking the question regarding OP's center. That's all.

MNgirl326 · November 2013

emberlee3 said:

abartow said:

emberlee3 said:

PP's point about ratios got me thinking: how do they plan to maintain ratio if he moves up before 12 months? In my state, the ratio must be based on the youngest child in the room, so any room with an infant under 12 months must be 1:4, even if the other children are older (obviously short visits are exceptions). It wouldn't make sense to move a child younger than 12 months to a 12-24 month room, because they'd have to add a teacher.

They have float teachers on staff for this. They know their busiest time of the day and make sure they are staffed in ratio for that, and then when kids start getting picked up and they start sending staff home, they have float teachers to make sure they are always in ratio if a teacher needs to leave. They also balance numbers by sending younger kids to older rooms to "visit" when ratios are a little off. Or for that matter sending younger kids to younger rooms to visit for awhile. Chances are, if your child is the next one to move up, he has already "visited" before and he has done just fine.
Also, this really, really isn't that big of deal. I promise. Looking back at LO's experience at a daycare center over the last 3 1/2 years, they really do know what they are doing and things always worked out best when I unclenched and trusted them a little more.   They know how to balance numbers, they know when to move kids up and they know how to make sure all the kids needs are being met. That is their jobs. I know it is scary to think of tiny un mobile baby with mobile 12 month babes. But I PROMISE it works out. The staff knows how to handle it.
I know it is easy to say, they are just doing it for them, and they aren't keeping the kids best interest at heart, but do you HONESTLY think that? If so, then you need to find a different daycare.   You need to find a place you where you can trust, and where you feel confident in their decisions.    Yes, its a business. They need to continually move kids up so they can continually bring more kids in. That's business, but if they didn't ultimately have the kids interest at heart, They WOULDN"T have a business.
Talk to the director. Let her know your concerns and have a conversation about it. Talk to the teachers in the next room.   Let them tell you how they handle things. And then take a deep breath. I promise it will be okay.
.

Um, how about you take a deep breath? I'm not the OP. My kids are in mixed age classrooms because I purposely chose that. My daughter is in a classroom that is 6 weeks to 2.5 years. DS is in 2.5 years to preK. I love the school, I love daycare. I am just asking the question regarding OP's center. That's all.

I was answering your question about the ratio's and then went on to talk to the OP and her center concerns. Sorry if it sounded like I was speaking to you specifically. That was not the intention.

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