Little bundle of problems (vent/guilt/whatever)

TheLittleRedM · November 2013

Well. So as many of you know by now, my niece and nephew are bundles of problems in smallish bodies.

My nephew went in for his monthly diabetes check up and told the nurse he wanted to kill himself which led to an automatic session with a therapist the next day. He has been diagnosed as severely depressed which I can't say that I'm totally surprised by. His best friend (these kids are 12) tried to touch my niece inappropriately (and on purpose, there is no innocent just seeing differences here) a couple years ago and my nephew caught them and called him out and said never do that again. Since then, the other kid has been the meanest bully ever and he's one of those people who gets everyone else to do what he wants so my nephew basically has no friends left at his school except for a couple older kids. And on top of this is puberty and diabetes and what not.

So apparently that's why he hasn't been taking the amount of insulin he needs for what he eats and why he takes insulin but won't eat. Because he knows that not eating correctly and taking insulin correctly runs the high risk of killing himself.

Also found out from the therapist that the psychiatrist my niece and nephew have been seeing is a pill pusher and not a good one so now my mom needs to find a new psychiatrist for them.

It's like if it isn't one thing, it's something worse. I feel awful for them and for my parents. My mom seemed calm about it but I know it really tears her up and she feels guilty for not realizing he was depressed. Like, this kid loves playing basketball but refused to join the basketball team at school even though he's been wanting to join for forever. We all had been assuming him not taking his insulin or what not was because he was trying to be like everyone else because he is someone that succumbs to peer pressure easily since he's been bullied so badly.

ETA: grammer issues

Erinm278 · November 2013

That's so terrible. I'm sorry.

TheLittleRedM · November 2013

This bully kid doesn't even look like he could do shit. Like, he's the tiniest kid in the class but he's effing mean. When I was doing daycare at their school, he tried to pull shit and be rude to my nephew and I tore into him hard. At least he behaved if I was around after that...

And I know I technically shouldn't condone this but sometimes violence is the answer. Got a text from my mom that my nephew got sent home from school today because he was tired of being picked on so he kicked the kid in the balls. The only reason he was sent home was because they have a no violence policy. But the bully has also been suspended because they've already given him two warnings.

Preston - 1 Bully - 0

opheliainwaders · November 2013

So sorry

It seems like they're on their way to getting the help and support they need, though, which is great.

jackson290721 · November 2013

I'm so sorry.Giant hugs!!

PrimRoseMama · November 2013

( This is so sad. I hope things look up for them.

karen0477 · November 2013

I'm sorry your family is going through this, it's heartbreaking....but , they are so lucky to have you and your mom on their side and looking out for them.

Muffin379 · November 2013

Sorry they are going through this but sounds like they have good advocates in you and your mom. Is there a park program he could join for basketball with different kids?

Bmore721 · November 2013

So sorry! Those poor kids.

bobcee · November 2013

That is so sad

. I'm sorry they are having to deal with this.

Stina2012 · November 2013

I'm sorry they're going through this. It's got to be hard not to be able to protect them from this crap.

TheLittleRedM · November 2013

@Dccornel The school they go to is attached to our church and I went there from K-8th grade. My mom has been contemplating the idea of taking them out and putting them in public school because the public schools in our area are way better about making kids take their meds when they're suppose to (which current school is slacking on) and it'd be more cost effective. But it's hard for her to just switch it up. My principal there still says that my class was the last good class that they had there (and by that I mean followed the rules, kind to others, etc.). The bullying has gone down since my nephew moved into the classroom that the principal teaches but yeah. I don't know what they're gonna do.

@Muffin379 There are some but they're nowhere near my parents' house and my parents don't have any ability to get them places because of work schedules. With the school, usually a teacher drives them to games. But it's definitely something my mom looked into. They're also looking into signing him up for Jiu Jitsu at DH's recommendation. But again, the biggest issue is lack of time in the day to take him places.

Aiylin · November 2013

my heart breaks for them. I hope you and your mom have the strength to be their solid rocks in this time of so much uncertainty in their lives.

hugs to you and those little ones.

[Deleted User] · November 2013

I'm sorry, that is so sad

valstulas · November 2013

Those poor kids. They've been through so much. They are lucky to have your family there to help them.

Your mom shouldn't beat herself up. It can be easy to miss signs of depression, especially in a boy who is the age where he will pull away from family anyway. It's scary to think that he wants to hurt himself and has such an ability to do it effectively.

I'll be thinking of you all. Hugs!

kaylakim · November 2013

How sad! I hope your nephew starts to feel better soonand can find a new psychiatrist.

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TheLittleRedM · November 2013

My mom is the sort to tear herself up about everything. I swear, she looks to blame herself for everything that has ever gone wrong in her life, big or small. I blame my grandpa for that because he wasn't the kindest person to his kids (I love him, he's figured things out with his grandkids and great-grandkids).

TheLittleRedM · November 2013

@mermomo5 Nope. Our town is super cheap. Like, it's stupid. They also wouldn't agree to pay for any testing to find out if my niece and nephew have learning disabilities because they go to a private school and not a public or charter school and my parents just don't have the funds to pay for the testing themselves.

chiboo9 · November 2013

Oh my

That's terribly sad. I'm so very sorry.

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TheLittleRedM · November 2013

@mermomo5 They do get medicaid so I'll forward that info to my mom

You're so helpful. Seriously, don't know why someone wouldn't like you unless they also don't like rainbows and unicorns and puppies and happiness.

fabk · November 2013

Being a kid is so hard sometimes. Yyour poor nephew. I say good for him for standing up to the bully. I hope theycan get moved to a different school.

TheLittleRedM · November 2013

Exactly. And my family is one of the few that have been with that school forever and my mom takes care of their tuition statements and the PTA treasury. Her threatening to leave the school was a big enough reality check that they actually started to pay attention to the bullying...that and he moved up to a different classroom where the teacher didn't play the 'oh they're just boys' card.

WifeyLovesHubs · November 2013

That's so terrible. My heart aches for all the children who have so much to worry about and can't just be kids. I hope there is an answer to all that your nephew is going through. He's lucky to have your mom and you to worry about him.

abalhawk2009 · November 2013

It breaks my heart to see how mean kids are today. I'm scared already to send the bean to school because it starts so young now.

UTQT09 · November 2013

How sad

atlvol · November 2013

I'm so sorry

EagleWife · November 2013

@TheLittleRedM - I saw your posts on the UO thread (I think that's where it was?) yesterday and wanted to comment, but couldn't wrestle the phone and the LO at the same time. I keep thinking of your poor N&N and all that you have shared of their experiences. It's just heartbreaking. Huge mega hugs to you and your mom and these precious kids. I hope that your nephew is able to get the help he needs to get past the depression and issues at school. It's just so sad. I'm so sorry.

Carrie3102 · November 2013

I'm so sorry your n&n have to deal with all this crap. It's not fair.

TheLittleRedM · November 2013

lizabethann06 I know there's the difference and I just couldn't think of which did the prescribing but I figured someone would correct me if I was wrong. Because I'm just too lazy to go look it up Lol But yes, the second part is more accurate in that they are also going to be seeing a new psychologist as well....but also a new psychiatrist Lol

aehamilton13 · November 2013

I'm so sorry!

[Deleted User] · November 2013

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