The other day I was loving on my Bella, (she's 20 months old) we were giving each other kisses and hugs and then I closed my eyes and I felt so sad. I imagined this is how it would be if I were kissing Emily and if she were kissing and hugging me. I look at Bella and I try to picture Emily..... I think I'm losing it, it breaks my heart. Bella thinks there is still a baby in my belly, she kisses it and rubs it....i hate this
I don't think you're crazy. For the first few months after losing Devon, I felt the same way. I still find myself imagining how things would be with Devon, how he and my older son would interact with one another. Devon looked so much like my older son, JJ, when he was born that it broke my heart even more...they would have been two peas in a pod. I just know it. I know how you feel; you're not crazy, and you're not alone! **HUGS**
((HUGS)) I often look at Anna and think about how it would have been to do the same with Patricia. That's why the loss of our babies doesn't get easier with time or with the birth of new babies.
There's a quote from "An Exact Replica of a Figment of my Imagination" which I love - "the love for the first magnifies the love for the second, and vice versa." Having a living child magnifies the love and loss in a different way. ((Hugs))
Me: 32 DH: 33 High School Sweethearts Married 5/28/2005
DS1 born 6/5/10 at 40 weeks via emergency c-section due to fetal distress and IUGR caused by placental insufficiency
DS2 born still 8/28/13 at 32 weeks via emergency c-section due to a complete placental abruption - cause unknown
Baby #3 on the way, EDD 2/29/16. Originally twins, but we said goodbye to Baby B at 8 weeks.
I don't think you're crazy. For the first few months after losing Devon, I felt the same way. I still find myself imagining how things would be with Devon, how he and my older son would interact with one another. Devon looked so much like my older son, JJ, when he was born that it broke my heart even more...they would have been two peas in a pod. I just know it. I know how you feel; you're not crazy, and you're not alone! **HUGS**
My oldest sons name is JJ also! I constantly will be brushing my oldest dd hair and imagine brushing Arianna's. Your not crazy.
Re: am I crazy ** LO mentioned
I don't think you're crazy. For the first few months after losing Devon, I felt the same way. I still find myself imagining how things would be with Devon, how he and my older son would interact with one another. Devon looked so much like my older son, JJ, when he was born that it broke my heart even more...they would have been two peas in a pod. I just know it. I know how you feel; you're not crazy, and you're not alone! **HUGS**
My oldest sons name is JJ also!
I constantly will be brushing my oldest dd hair and imagine brushing Arianna's. Your not crazy.