Parenting

UO Recap: It's so long! edition

I’m friends with the monster that’s under my bed
Get along with the voices inside of my head
You’re trying to save me, stop holdin’ your breath
And you think I’m crazy, yeah you think I’m crazy
Well read my recap!


Executive Summary: Tattoos, vaginas and cake (thanks, @Sterling13!) More shit too, probably. I dunno.
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
-My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
«13

Re: UO Recap: It's so long! edition

  • Page 1:

    @WasNotWas doesn’t like ombre hair or paisley print

    @angelashly thinks TV is an awesome babysitter. I agree, with the caveat that sometimes it’s hard to put the genie back in the bottle.

    @NotSharknado is surprised that shoulder pads are back in and doesn’t like them. Correct.

    @WasNotWas doesn’t like colored diamonds. She’s wrong, but they are only truly great if they are less expensive than clear ones. People have some feels about this.

    @dramamama2be doesn’t like the combo of short shorts, uggs, and a hoodie.

    @Sterling13 can’t take Matthew McConaughey serious as an actor. Same boat, he’ll always bet the guy who likes the fact they stay the same age.

    @TwlightMV hates the newest Wendy’s ad where they whisper Pretzel Bun. She hates the sound of whispering. It’s because we’re talking about her.

    @hiddenmickey likes wearing a bra except when she sleeps.

    @missyishere thinks salon eyelash extensions are a bit ridic.

    @NotSharknado is bothered that her whole family wears red on Xmas day. She should rebel and wear GREEN!

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
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  • Page 2:

    @robinsokj prefers being naked

    @mbenit4 doesn’t like Dr. Seuss books, but was a really good sport playing along when the expected replies came! She does not like them in a train or on a boat or in a plane! I, on the other hand, really like it in a box.

    @cocomama1109 doesn’t understand the appeal for women of going commando. She gets drippy and juicy. I was legally required to recap this. There was debate of the pros and cons of underwear vs. commando. I have a *hunch* people in cooler climates are more ok with commando than those in warmer climates.

    @HilarityEnsued can’t believe crop tops are back. I kinda like them.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 3:

    @jessicabcairns spells it pyjamas, which they wear to Christmas

    The ever untaggable Little Jerry hates wearing pajamas all day.

    @LaurelBee hates parties like 31, scentsy and pampered chef. Very popular.

    @sandyapples thinks Ricky Gervais has a smug face. He is very funny but has a bad habit of mugging too much for the camera.

    -I still love yoga pants and feel they are fashion’s greatest achievement.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 4:

    @scoutkate doesn’t like super coordinated Xmas trees. Agreed, especially when you have kids

    @LovelyRitaMeterMaid hates a tide commercial I haven’t seen.

    @Jack9 hates getting drunk and prefers a buzz. Very popular

    @SGC29 loves giant blow up Xmas lawn decorations

    @cocomama1109 does not like curtains. This led to the natural progression of curtains matching the rug and hardwood floors.

    @SGC29 genuinely likes tacky Xmas sweaters without irony. I think she just loves anythign Christmas. She does think she’d make a wonderful elf.

    @Jack9 thinks abbreviating of words in forums is lazy, but he’s ok with some acronyms.

    @BlinkMe182 hates Uggs. With any clothes or lack of clothes. I think I could accept them with lack of clothes.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 5:

    @LovelyRitaMeterMaid doesn’t think the Big Bang Theory is funny. It frustrates me because it could be SO MUCH BETTER. But it goes for the cheap joke more often than genuine cleveness. I still want to write a spec script for a more realistic show I shall tentatively title “Nerds”. But yeah, four PhDs and NONE of them are potheads? Not realistic at all.

    @MabelShesABiotch thinks this recap is going to be hilarious. I have a feeling the actual thread >>> recap this week.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 6:

    I bore @MabelShesABiotch with my lack of ink. Joke will be on her when my pristine body is resurrected and hers is not!

    - juicy vs. dry vagina. Again, I think there’s a temperature factor: note that a lot of the pro-commando ladies are the Iowans.

    @LovelyRitaMeterMaid hates people who change their manner of speech around different groups of people. I personally think doing so shows a degree of social grace, but can drift into fakey.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • LuckyDad said:
    Page 6:


    - juicy vs. dry vagina. Again, I think there’s a temperature factor: note that a lot of the pro-commando ladies are the Iowans.

    HAHAHAHA!


    imageimage
    Parenting Floozie Brigades official motto:  We welcome to you the board with open legs.  Also, open beers. ~@cinemagoddess



  • Page 7:

    @BunkinMama learned the hard way you POST YOUR UO and THEN read the thread!!!

    @FTWR wants to be able to tell assholes to quit being twat bags without getting into trouble.

    @CinemaGoddess thinks people who don’t like “Scandal” are fools. I haven’t seen it yet.

    - Hardwood floors = waxed (or shaved) vaginas, for anyone who didn’t get it.

    - discussion of how to manage a buzz. Feels very college to me.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • I'm a Texan commando goer
    Yeah, but your heart belongs in Iowa @Justaphase, just admit it. 


    imageimage
    Parenting Floozie Brigades official motto:  We welcome to you the board with open legs.  Also, open beers. ~@cinemagoddess



  • Page 8:

    @Hesterlicious thinks Xmas lights should go up as soon as it is dark in the evenings. It’s ok, just go ahead and put your lights up after your Canadian Thanksgiving. In October.

    @SGC29 thinks Brian Cranston is kinda hot. He’s super hot.

    @mbenit4 is a racist who only likes white lights on her tree

    @msdrdg doesn’t think blue is a Xmas color. It’s a Hanukkah color! But also ok for Christmanukkah!

    @msdrdg also hates LED Xmas lights

    @SGC29 thinks Ben Afflack is a saint. He will always be the proprietor of Fashionable Male who like sex in an uncomfortable place to me.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • LuckyDad said:

    @SGC29 thinks Ben Afflack is a saint. He will always be the proprietor of Fashionable Male who like sex in an uncomfortable place to me.

    Like the back of a volkswagon?
    ___________________________________________________________
          
     image
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  • Page 9:

    - tattoo talk

    @mbenit4 is still juicy after two kids

    @Helenahhandbasket loves peplum dresses and tops. She got zero love tits for this. They aren’t flattering at all.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 10:

    - moar tattoo talk.

    @Spapeggy doesn’t think Adam Lavine is sexy. He’s pretty much the worst, in all ways.

    @SunnyDays26 thinks expensive everyday clothes for little kid are silly.

    @Rae1105 would rather have a job bartending than a day job. How old are you? I would have agreed in my late 20s. Now, in my mid 30s, midnight sounds quite late.

    @justAPhase can’t stand Katy Perry or her music. She’s wrong. Although the new album isn’t as good as her previous one, and I’m over Roar.

    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 11:

    @colliebabe thinks vanity sizing is stupid

    - Uggs and Tatts.

    @CinemaGoddess thinks crocs are foot heaven. Unpopular
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 12:

    @ILoveNaps enjoys the smell of beer breath


    @BunkinMama doesn’t like socks or shoes are would like to be barefoot all the time

    @pobrecita would wear crocs if they could make her orgasm on command

    @SunnyDays26 thinks elementary school teachers should switch grades every few years.

    @LuckyDad thinks turtles are super cute but make terrible pets. Somewhat popular.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Just waiting for page 13.
    Prepare for serious disappointment.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 13:

    @LuckyDad thinks sleeves that are designed to be worn rolled up look stupid.

    @MabelShesABiotch would gladly take a pill if she could sleep without dreaming. Unfortunately melatonin has the opposite effect.

    - Jack9 didn’t have enough toys growing up
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 14:

    - Jack9 and Luckydad have no beef beyond some very low level snark during Jack’s extremely impatient GBCB.

    Page 15:

    - discussion of the “perfect” height. Y’all are short; not a one of you is over 6’ (maybe FunTaint?)

    - beef curtains and motorboating

    @SookieFrackhouse68 accused me of being eerily quiet at 8:30 AM Pacific time. When I was in traffic on my way to work. It’s not a UO that rain is stupid and people who can’t drive in it are stupider.

    - I do fully support motorboating though.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • LauraT25 said:
    @luckydad you should totally write the pilot for your show, I will watch it.  I am so with you on BBT.  It falls very flat for me.

    BUT Howard doesn't have his PhD, so there are three.  Unless you are counting Blossom as the fourth.
    There's like four guys on that show, right? And some ladies?

    I have only seen random episodes in syndication.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • LuckyDad said:
    Page 10:

    - moar tattoo talk.

    @Spapeggy doesn’t think Adam Lavine is sexy. He’s pretty much the worst, in all ways.

    @SunnyDays26 thinks expensive everyday clothes for little kid are silly.

    @Rae1105 would rather have a job bartending than a day job. How old are you? I would have agreed in my late 20s. Now, in my mid 30s, midnight sounds quite late.

    @justAPhase can’t stand Katy Perry or her music. She’s wrong. Although the new album isn’t as good as her previous one, and I’m over Roar.

    I am a whopping 24 over here. 

    But I made the recap again so that's a highlight in my day...



    image
  • Page 16:

    - Princess Bride references

    - LovelyRitaMeterMaid asked if Checkered Vans are still cool. Seems they are.

    @MrsSkull1107 hates shoelaces.

    Page 17:

    Did @reesefox find and eat the missing dorito?

    @CinemaGoddess wondered if we would hit 30 pages today. We did.

    - FOOD!
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • I did not find the Dorito. I probably shook it out of my shirt, but I also don't see it on the floor anywhere so it could still be in there. It was not a whole chip btw.

    "Man, be creative. Like the stuff you do. Do nice things. Love respectfully. Laugh a fucking lot. Curse when you feel like it. Life is cool." - Jean Grae

    image image
    M (3/9/02) and E (2/28/12)

    image

  • MabelShesABiotch said:
    LuckyDad said:
    Page 13:

    @LuckyDad thinks sleeves that are designed to be worn rolled up look stupid.
    Please to note fucky admitted he was wrong on the chat of snaps. FTR.
    https://cdnc.lystit.com/photos/2013/03/08/calvin-klein-ombre-check-shirt-with-roll-up-sleeves-product-1-6934481-082247870_large_flex.jpeg
    Fug.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • I like the shirts intended to roll up for women.  I have long arms, and they don't always work for full-length sleeves.  


    imageimage
    Parenting Floozie Brigades official motto:  We welcome to you the board with open legs.  Also, open beers. ~@cinemagoddess



  • Page 18:

    Should I even bother with the rest? Sure

    - Some of y'all do not know how to snack.

    Page 19:

    - SNACKS!
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • I like the shirts intended to roll up for women.  I have long arms, and they don't always work for full-length sleeves.  
    If only they sold shirts with short sleeves.

    But upon further review, it's mostly men's dress shirts that look terrible when intended to be worn rolled up.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • pobrecita said:
    At least it doesn't have epaulets? 
    My shirt today has both. Fucky said it was NOT FUG for chick shirts. Or he was trying to not piss me off. NOW I WANT TO KNOW WHICH ONE IT WAS.
    You only snapped me your sleeve, and it looked ok on that specific woman's shirt.

    The Epaulets probably would be no bueno.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • My Harry Styles inspired shirt is the roll up kind, and it's wicked cute.


    imageimage
    Parenting Floozie Brigades official motto:  We welcome to you the board with open legs.  Also, open beers. ~@cinemagoddess



  • Page 20:

    - Mas snackos

    Page 21:

    More food

    @mbenit4 doesn't get staged smash cakes. She thinks the kid should be allowed to choose to smash or not. And no rehearsals for it!
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • I'm so glad my shoelaces UO made it in the recap. That's like a rally rally RALLY important UO.
    I have serious sympathy for tardy-to-the-party late page legit UOs.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 22:

    More food.

    Page 23:

    - Smash cake discussion

    - Frosting is good


    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Shirt validation...anyone? No?

    I DIDNT get anything.


    imageimage
    Parenting Floozie Brigades official motto:  We welcome to you the board with open legs.  Also, open beers. ~@cinemagoddess




  • Just waiting for page 13.
    Prepare for serious disappointment.
    Boy. I bet you tell ladies that "normally never happens!"
    You win this round...
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • Page 24:

    @MabelShesABiotch fails to see how awesome frosting on Brownies is. Yes, this is a food UO, but SHE IS SO WRONG.
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BhqjipgCIAAOz7H.jpg
    -My son was born in April 2012. He pretty much rules.
  • LuckyDad said:
    Page 24:

    @MabelShesABiotch fails to see how awesome frosting on Brownies is. Yes, this is a food UO, but SHE IS SO WRONG.
    thank you. 

    damn.  

    imageimage 

    image

    Unable to even.  

    ********************

    You don't understand the appeal of Benedict Cumberbatch / think he's fug / don't know who he is? WATCH SHERLOCK.  Until you do, your negative opinion of him will not be taken seriously.



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