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July 2014 Moms
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Reveal to Step-daughter

mrs.ammamrs.amma member
in July 2014 Moms
My husband has a wonderful, sweet 10yo daughter. I've known her since she was 2 1/2 but because of a lot of court bs and family drama we didn't see her from when she was 4-8. We've come a loooooong way in the last 2 years and have now had regular every-other-weekend visits for a little over a year now. 

We plan on telling her she's about to be a big sister (she's an only child currently) the weekend before Thanksgiving, but I am so nervous about her reaction. I want to make sure she doesn't feel replaced or cast out. Plus I want to make it fun. Any thoughts/ideas are greatly appreciated!
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Re: Reveal to Step-daughter

  • jenandtim828jenandtim828 member
    Good luck! Sounds like she's lucky to have you:) I don't have any children or stepchildren, but I am a teacher and know that kids her age thrive on being helpful! Hopefully she will love this opportunity to help with her new baby brother or sister and take pride in her new role. Does she know you've been TTC or will this be a shock?
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  • mrs.ammamrs.amma member
    We haven't talked about specifically about TTC, but she has mentioned wanting to have a little brother or sister and we said there will be a time when she will be. 

    I just thought it would be nice to something a little special for the reveal so she knows we're excited for her to be a big sister even if she isn't with us all the time.
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  • jenandtim828jenandtim828 member
    Maybe a piece of jewelry she can wear? Like her birthstone and the babies? I've seen necklaces that look like 2 kids and the stones are in the body. Sounds like she'll be excited if she's been asking!
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  • ShalondaReneeShalondaRenee member
    Aw, congrats!! I like the birthstone idea and I'm sure she will be so happy to have a little sister or brother!! Good luck.
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  • mrs.ammamrs.amma member
    Birthstone idea is really cute! And lucky for my step-daughter her birthstone is diamond  :P
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  • January BrideJanuary Bride member
    The birthstone idea is great!  Not trying to pry, but do you think it will also help you guys a bit if you inform your step daughter's mother about the new addition?  I'm only asking because I have some friends who have been through this situation.  It caused problems for them when their daughter returned to her mother and told her about the sibling, and then she flipped out and started causing new drama because she found out "that way".  Even with your court rights, I am sure you want to make this as smooth as possible for you guys and your step daughter.

    Congratulations! Very exciting that she will be a big sister :)
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  • mercy0606mercy0606 member
    I have a step son and would love ideas for revealing to him!  He is 13 and his momma is probably NOT going to be happy...but I cannot change that.  I can only ensure we inform him in a way that makes him feel special and included.  
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  • mrs.ammamrs.amma member
    Good call @January Bride ! She's much more amenable these days, but she should be in the loop to try and head off any issues/drama. 
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