Quite the birth story.

andrew's wifey · October 2013

https://birthwithoutfearblog.com/2013/10/29/the-freebirth-of-apple-blossom-light-hawk-summer-willow-wind/

Mimaloo · October 2013

WTF? Sorry I can't get on board with that. At all.

andrew's wifey · October 2013

I'll say this: I'm all for natural parenting. I love the thought of an unmedicated birth, I'm all for breastfeeding, and bed sharing and you will see an amber teething necklace on this kid just like my 3 yr old wore.

But I also like my electricity, running water, and my doctor to sew the 'tear near my pee-hole' up.

ksyknelvr73 · October 2013

What the absolute hell.

TheRealNJhousewife · October 2013

This girl has no running water or electric, but can blog? I'm confused...and disturbed

mrsbtobe20122 · October 2013

What the fluck. Who keeps a placenta in a cupboard for days?!

Edited: I also reread, who eats raw placenta?!?

andrew's wifey · October 2013

@TheRealNJhousewife

Even primitive lifestyle livin mama's need their starbuck's fix. )

Maybe she penned it with a quill and had her husband deliver it by horseback to the person who writes the blog.

andrew's wifey · October 2013

::sings::

She had them Apple Blossom jeans... boots with the fur (for trudging to the outhouse in the snow)

mirdamae03 · October 2013

Sweet Jeezus...

Mimaloo · October 2013

TheRealNJhousewife said:

This girl has no running water or electric, but can blog? I'm confused...and disturbed

Whooooooaaaaaa - this did not even register when I read it! Maybe because I was so shocked at the fact that she took a bite of her placenta before stashing it away in a cabinet for days. And didn't she say that she had to bundle up to go to the bathroom?

But true - she can post things...on the internet. That poor baby.

Hooper88 · October 2013

Wow....just wow

julesf817 · October 2013

i can't even with this. i just CAN'T.

people used to live that way 200 years ago. and lots, and lots and LOTS of women and babies died during child birth.

no prenatal care?? this idiot got SO lucky her precious "Joey" wasn't loading the sleigh up with two corpses after this.

and she named the f-ing baby Apple Blossom Light Hawk Summer Willow Wind?? GTFO.

andrew's wifey · October 2013

mrsbtobe20122 said:

What the fluck. Who keeps a placenta in a cupboard for days?! Edited: I also reread, who eats raw placenta?!?

I think it's really interesting that a few years ago the question would have been 'who eats placenta' and now it's 'who eats RAW placenta?'

Chellbell20 · October 2013

I guess to each their own, I'm just glad everything worked out okay.

By the way, I love love love Birth without fear. Check out their blog or Facebook page.

andrew's wifey · October 2013

@Chellbell20 Their Instagram is full of beautiful pictures of babies and mommas and cool products. I'm glad it went well for them too. It could have been REALLY bad.

busterbeagle · October 2013

There are parts of that that almost sound like a joke. Just kidding, right? RIGHT?

busterbeagle · October 2013

Jules51814 said:

and she named the f-ing baby Apple Blossom Light Hawk Summer Willow Wind?? GTFO.

Actually, the baby's name evolved into that over a few months. It's like a Pokemon.

Allibob · October 2013

Am I a hater if I don't believe it? I feel like someone's gone a little overboard with their creative writing. The final straw was when she said her belly was limp & squishy right after delivery. Sorry, no. Maybe if you're hemorrhaging.

julesf817 · October 2013

busterbeagle said:

and she named the f-ing baby Apple Blossom Light Hawk Summer Willow Wind?? GTFO.
Actually, the baby's name evolved into that over a few months. It's like a Pokemon.

aaaah gotcha. well that makes so much more sense!

PikaPikaChick · October 2013

Apple Blossom Light Hawk Summer Willow Wind

AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*gasp*

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

runningyogimama · October 2013

Yeah, I call BS.

danabsd · October 2013

Guise, that's what redrosepinkcrazy is using for inspiration.

danabsd · October 2013

andplusalso, if she didn't have any prenatal care how did she know it was a girl?

julesf817 · October 2013

busterbeagle said:

and she named the f-ing baby Apple Blossom Light Hawk Summer Willow Wind?? GTFO.
Actually, the baby's name evolved into that over a few months. It's like a Pokemon.

I think i've figured out the evolution.

Free Birther: "Ooh i like Apples. Gwenyth Paltrow named her baby Apple and she eats a weird macro biotic diet! Blossom was a great show. She wore those amazing hats with flowers on them...Blossoms! Ohh look it's Light out! Oh a bird! Is that a Hawk? usually only see those in the Summer! There's another one in the Willow tree! Look at the branches go, must be the Wind!

Then Joey is like "Think it's time to stop looking out the window honey."

cbrust · October 2013

I'm confused as to how she knew her little GIRL was coming if she had no prenatal care... I mean obviously after birth she knew it was a girl but for the story's sake I would have just stuck with saying baby.

dollface777 · October 2013

She had no prenatal care but knew her baby was a girl? How does that work?

What a loon.

julesf817 · October 2013

ErBear1010 said:

I wanted a nature name...I picked Reed.....not ALL THE NATURES!

I think Marsh Reed Toad Log Autumn has a way better ring to it.

busterbeagle · October 2013

ErBear1010 said:

I wanted a nature name...I picked Reed.....not ALL THE NATURES!

You can't haz all the natures unless you poop outside.

Magheeta · October 2013

peachysweet4 · October 2013

What a great story just in time for Halloween.

Tkhixen · October 2013

I call bull! She has a blog diary but no electricity! Whatever!

83edwards · October 2013

No....this is absolutely the scariest thing I have read in a long time. I don't understand the decision making process that this couple went through. However, after thinking about the story, I have decided to name my baby:

Running waters central heat sterilization light bulb

NIckname will come once I know gender

ABColeslaw · October 2013

I think I vomitted a little more tonight than usual.

RedInLove · October 2013

busterbeagle said:

and she named the f-ing baby Apple Blossom Light Hawk Summer Willow Wind?? GTFO.
Actually, the baby's name evolved into that over a few months. It's like a Pokemon.

I think i've figured out the evolution.

Free Birther: "Ooh i like Apples. Gwenyth Paltrow named her baby Apple and she eats a weird macro biotic diet! Blossom was a great show. She wore those amazing hats with flowers on them...Blossoms! Ohh look it's Light out! Oh a bird! Is that a Hawk? usually only see those in the Summer! There's another one in the Willow tree! Look at the branches go, must be the Wind!

Then Joey is like "Think it's time to stop looking out the window honey."

I'm surprised the name doesn't include "Squirrel!"

noe2013 · October 2013

Definitely think this is bull, seems full of it

sammy.k · October 2013

Her pee-hole ripped?? You think she got that sh*t fixed?!

CopperPoppy · October 2013

For the love of all that is sane and rational, wtf is this?

As a matter of fact, she can keep her crazy and take it as far away from me and my family and get off the interwebs. There's no more room for that flavor of nuts over here. Poor windy snow apple baby.

awc1986 · October 2013

I find it frightening how some women are trying to "out natural" each other in having children, with no thought to the risks they're posing to themselves or their child. Thing is, I bet women 200 years ago would have killed to have the facilities we have nowadays. They're probably looking down and thinking "wtf are you doing you crazy bitch? Go to a hospital!"

sisterjanet · October 2013

awc1986 said:

I find it frightening how some women are trying to "out natural" each other in having children, with no thought to the risks they're posing to themselves or their child. Thing is, I bet women 200 years ago would have killed to have the facilities we have nowadays. They're probably looking down and thinking "wtf are you doing you crazy bitch? Go to a hospital!"

Seriously. Even 200 years ago women wanted the dr or midwife there to help.

danabsd · October 2013

I was thinking about this again in the shower and I pray I am never in a situation where my husband has to stick his finger up my baginga to break my water. Something's should be left to the imagination and he held a leg the last time around.

awc1986 · October 2013

danabsd said:

I was thinking about this again in the shower and I pray I am never in a situation where my husband has to stick his finger up my baginga to break my water. Something's should be left to the imagination and he held a leg the last time around.

Exactly. There are medical professionals to deal with that whole area. I've told DH he's staying "top end".

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