xp: Intro and loss at 21 weeks

diamante1181 · October 2013

Hello everyone. Firstly, let me say how sorry I am that anyone has to be on this board at all. A little about my story is in my siggy. We were expecting twins, a boy and a girl, and we had made it to 21 weeks and a few days. I had gone to bed, and my water broke. Long story short, after developing fever and infection, they had to induce and I gave birth to my little angels on 10/23. I am such a mess, my husband and I have just been spending time alone together since everything happened. I am split in two. One half is almost dead, the other half is still hopeful for the future. They made us memory boxes at the hospital, with their little clothes, pictures that were taken of them together, and their hand and foot molds and prints. I have seriously come undone. I kiss the boxes every night. I talk to them in my mind. I wish they could have stayed and that we could've gotten to know them. To see them grow. To give them all the love they could have ever dreamed. I don't know how I will get through this at all. I don't know anything right now. I don't know if and when we will try again. All I know is that deep inside I have the desire to be a mother, and don't know if it will ever happen. If you read all that, thank you. I don't know where else to turn without judgement.

stefuge · October 2013

***LO ticker*** I am so sorry for your loss of precious Sophie and Gabriel. T & P for you and your family.

OSUWifey09 · October 2013

***SIGGY WARNING***

I'm so, so sorry for your losses. The early days are so hard - you do what you have to in order to get through them. If you feel better talking to your angels, awesome. I still talk to my angel baby a lot, and I'm more than a year out from my loss. It makes me feel like we still have a connection, even though he's not here.

I hope you turn to us when you need us - to vent, to get thoughts out, whatever. I'm so sorry to welcome you here, but we're here for you. **HUGS**

diamante1181 · October 2013

Thanks so much. It means a lot to have people understand what you are going through.

Dixon813 · October 2013

~~Siggy Warning~~

I am so, so very sorry for your losses. I, too, lost multiples (triplets) and our boy is also named Gabriel. There aren't words to offer that will make it better, but please take it easy and do what you need to do. Know that this board is super supportive - use it however and whenever. And if you ever need or want to talk, PM me.

Again, I'm so sorry you're going through this...many prayers to you

CRUN2012 · October 2013

So sorry for your losses. I too just lost a son at 26 weeks and delivered him only a couple days ago. I can absolutely relate to the rollercoaster of emotions...I think today I went from so devastated that I couldn't breathe to feeling hopeful for the future to thankful for having the short time I had with my baby boy to desperately feeling like I wanted to be pregnant again. I imagine its going to be this way for awhile before it gets better but I've noticed that it helps to let myself fully feel all of those emotions whenever they come..i believe it is helping me cope and process all of this.

Good luck in your journey and I'm so glad you found a place like this for support...I know that it has already helped me!

VyD81 · October 2013

I'm sorry you have to join this board and so sorry for the loss of your sweet Sophie and Gabriel. I too desperately want to be a mom and not sure if it will ever happen. Try to take it easy and one day at a time. This board has been very helpful to me, and I hope it will to you. Big hugs.

Ticker id: ra2f

schulme2 · October 2013

I am so sorry to welcome you here and hate that you need to be here. I hope that you find some comfort coming to us here. It really has helped to be able to share/vent with the only people who really get it.

irons633 · October 2013

I am so sorry for your losses of Sophie and Gabriel. I hate to welcome you this board, but I can say there isn't another place I would rather that be than with this group of supportive women. I also just gave birth to my daughter on the 18th at 27 weeks and I have my days. Allow yourself to have and days and cry for I do now the days get easier but in only time does it. I do long for being pregnant again since this is our second loss in less than a year. I do know we will be pregnant again and bring home healthy babies. Love and hugs to you sweetie!!

mingaling2 · October 2013

I'm so sorry for the loss of your precious Sophie and Gabriel. This board has been such a comfort to me - I hope you can find it here, too.

shandorfml2 · October 2013

I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet babies. (((hugs)))) lean on us when you need to, we've all been there.

Noethola · October 2013

***Siggy warning***

So very sorry for the loss of your sweet children.

I too still talk to my daughter, so do not feel like you are doing something strange. Please use this board however you may need for us to support you.

kz's_girlygirl · October 2013

I am so sorry for the loss of your son and daughter. This board has been an immense source of comfort for me, and I hope you can find some here as well. Be patient with yourself and allow yourself to feel/do whatever you need to in order to get through the day. Lots of love and healing thoughts coming your way.

BrittianyM · October 2013

Very sorry for the loss of your sweet baby girl and your sweet baby boy. Sending thoughts and prayers your way. We are here for you when you need us.

LifeofCat · October 2013

I posted this in the other loss board but just in case you're here first:

I am so sorry for your loss of sweet Sophie and Gabriel.

I lost my daughter Marianne at 22 weeks, and the pain remains unbearable some days. She was so beautiful, as I know your children were beautiful. Don't be afraid to take good care of yourself and to take the time you need to heal. Nothing is right or wrong in grief; everyone's journey is different.

Never hesitate to send me a private message if you need to; I'm sending you much love and strength (((Hugs)))

jbranden12 · October 2013

I am so sorry for the loss of your Sophie and Gabriel. Many of your feelings are familiar to us here. Know that is totally normal to begin thinking of trying for another baby right away. It is hard to talk to those who cannot understand what we are feeling. Loss moms often feel judged for grieving too long and not long enough. You are safe and welcome here!

jonahsma · November 2013

I am so sorry for your loss... I will pray for you for peace and comfort through the days and nights.whenever you feel lonely or Sad come on here and write even if us just a thought or a Poem or a letter to your precious babies. Be blessed

xp: Intro and loss at 21 weeks

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