Induction at 37 weeks, Labor without husband, advice please.

CallieMckennaDavis · October 2013

Well to start I'm very new the the military family thing. Hubby leaves for boot in 5 weeks, and after that I'll see him from the 20th of December and he leaves to go back to boot on January 2. My due date is January 25th, I have talked to my doctor a lot and i love him so much because he understands my situation to a point because he was in the army too. So I've really been able to open up to him which is great, We have made the decision to induce me on the 11th of January I'll be 37 weeks. And at first i really didn't want to be induced i wanted everything to happen naturally, but my husband graduates boot on February 4th and we want me to be able to have as long as possible to recover and baby to grow a little bit and get used to the outside world before we go one the 10 hour drive so he can meet his daughter for the first time. I need advice on a few things, one how to get threw the last 3 months of my pregnancy and labor without him, and two the induction I'm terrified, and three the traveling in a car with a newborn for 10 hours. We will be stopping a lot and my parent will be driving so i will be in the back with her. I'm just so scared about it all someone please give me some advice or hope or something. Thank you.

Beachy730 · October 2013

Personally I would get a new doctor because they are not supposed to induce for anything other than medical reasons before 39 weeks. Seeing him graduate is not worth risking the health of you and your baby.

https://www.acog.org/About%20ACOG/News%20Room/News%20Releases/2013/Early%20Deliveries%20Without%20Medical%20Indications.aspx

As for your questions: 1. There was nothing in my pregnancy that I couldn't have done without H, so not having him there wouldn't have been a problem except for the emotional toll. As for delivery have your plan of who will be in the room with you. You likely won't be able to skype with him, but have him find out how you can notify him when the baby is born.

2. Inductions can be very successful, but they also pose a higher risk for c-section. Honestly with an induction at 37 weeks you probably have a very high chance of c-section, especially if this is your first baby. Many babies aren't even in position by 37 weeks, and you probably wouldn't be dilated much, if at all. So if you are really going to go through with this then plan and prepare for a c/s. Again I go back to my first comment though and would be getting a different doctor.

I was induced at 39 weeks and it resulted in a c/s. My baby also spent 5 days in the NICU, but that wasn't related to the induction.

3. We traveled 12 hours in the car with a 2.5 month old and it was fine. One of sat in the back with him at all times. We had everything out and accessible and stopped every couple hours and let him out.

CallieMckennaDavis · October 2013

The reason he's so okay with it is 37 weeks is full term and shes measuring big so the planned on inducing me anyways because I'm very very tiny and if she gets to big, well you know she wont fit. lol, I'm I'm having problems carrying I'm on bed rest because my body has already tried to go into labor. He said getting me to 37 weeks will be great given that she is already trying to come out.

Beachy730 · October 2013

CallieMckennaDavis said:

The reason he's so okay with it is 37 weeks is full term and shes measuring big so the planned on inducing me anyways because I'm very very tiny and if she gets to big, well you know she wont fit. lol, I'm I'm having problems carrying I'm on bed rest because my body has already tried to go into labor. He said getting me to 37 weeks will be great given that she is already trying to come out.

The bolded doesn't make any sense because no doctor should trust an u/s measurement for baby's size, nor would they already sign up to induce labor 3 months from now because of said size. My baby measured at 97th percentile on an u/s, consistently measured at least a week ahead, and was only 7lbs3oz at birth. Also our bodies are designed to give birth, and "very very tiny" women give birth all the time just fine.

Eh, only you know the real situation, but with anyone I know on bed rest and going into early labor their doctor has still tried to get them as close to 39 weeks as possible before inducing. They just don't stop labor after 37 weeks.

Beachy730 · October 2013

Funny that just a month ago she was measuring normal.

https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12067507/20-weeks-pregnant-is-it-normal#latest

Also if that is your real name you should delete this account and create a new one without using your real name.

LyndseylovesHugh · October 2013

I would never get induced that early for any reason that is not a medical necessity and I am shocked that your doctor is willing to do so. And I agree with PP, how you are measuring is just an estimate and no good doctor would say with certainty that your baby is going to be big enough to induce early. Also, your size does not have much to do with birthing your baby, plenty of tiny women have large babies with no issue. I was induced at 39w3d for medical reasons and ended up with a c-section, being induced that early really increases your chance of having one as well. Also, we drove 15 hours when my DD was 7 weeks old and it was so easy, so slept the entire time. It was significantly easier to drive 15 hours with her at that age then it is just to drive to the store with a one year old.

ETA: Saying that you want her to have time to grow a bit before making the drive makes no sense to me, why not let her finish growing inside where she belongs at the point? She will be much better off if you let her come when she is ready.

NSL · October 2013

As the mom of a former NICU baby (who was born at 41 weeks while my H was deployed) this plan is terrible. What happens if your baby has serious health complications from not being ready to be born yet? How will you deal with having a newborn in the NICU knowing that your decision likely put him there? At 37 weeks there's a reasonably good chance that your baby's lungs won't be ready to deal with the outside world. Are you really willing to risk your child's health for the sake of convenience? Plan to skip the graduation. It's not ideal, but you and your husband's desires don't get to come first anymore when you become parents. Let your baby come when he or she is ready. Having a baby without your spouse there is far from ideal, but it's also not that huge a problem in the long run. Don't make a stupid decision.

Lissa832 · October 2013

You and our doctor both sounds like real morons. You don't induce a baby at 37 weeks for convenience. If he is willing to go along with this stupidity,then he should not be in practice, period. How selfish are you? Do you understand the risks associated here? If you don't, then educate yourself. If you do, consider sterilization afterwards. You don't NEED to be at his graduation. Your child does NEED unselfish parents to protect her well being. I have no tolerance for this type of stupidity.

ArmyWife114 · October 2013

Beachy730 said:

Personally I would get a new doctor because they are not supposed to induce for anything other than medical reasons before 39 weeks. Seeing him graduate is not worth risking the health of you and your baby.

https://www.acog.org/About%20ACOG/News%20Room/News%20Releases/2013/Early%20Deliveries%20Without%20Medical%20Indications.aspx

As for your questions: 1. There was nothing in my pregnancy that I couldn't have done without H, so not having him there wouldn't have been a problem except for the emotional toll. As for delivery have your plan of who will be in the room with you. You likely won't be able to skype with him, but have him find out how you can notify him when the baby is born.

2. Inductions can be very successful, but they also pose a higher risk for c-section. Honestly with an induction at 37 weeks you probably have a very high chance of c-section, especially if this is your first baby. Many babies aren't even in position by 37 weeks, and you probably wouldn't be dilated much, if at all. So if you are really going to go through with this then plan and prepare for a c/s. Again I go back to my first comment though and would be getting a different doctor.
I was induced at 39 weeks and it resulted in a c/s. My baby also spent 5 days in the NICU, but that wasn't related to the induction.

All of this, but especially the bolded. I was induced at 36w 5d for medical reasons, I would never elect to induce that early for personal reasons. Even my doctor was surprised I delivered vaginally because DS was not in position when the induction started.

Also, you couldn't pay me a million dollars to drive 10 hours with a 3 week old. DS was a good napper, but not that good. We could run to Target and stuff, but I can't imagine trying to go 10 hours almost straight in a car with him at that age since his needs were fairly constant.

HisChamaoleGirl · October 2013

What an absolutely selfish reason to put your baby through an induction and bring lo into the world early.

iluvmytxrgr · October 2013

I'm going to agree with everyone else here. Not that I would ever consider it, especially after having a 36 weeker naturally, but my husband would be ticked if the thought even crossed my mind. It honestly isn't worth the risk. See him when he gets home.

NavyPilotWife · October 2013

Like all the PP mentioned, it is ridiculously selfish to induce at 37th weeks. DD1 (8lbs 7oz) was born at 39w2d and DD2 (7lbs 15oz) was born at least a week earlier (dates and measurements were all over the place my entire pregnancy). DD2 was much sleepier than DD1. She was really difficult to wake up to get her to eat. She lost a decent amount of weight her first few days, but did make it back to her birth weight by a week. There's a reason why pregnancy is 40 weeks. They are still developing those last few weeks.

I also would not take a long car trip with a newborn. I flew from VA to CA, when DD2 was 2.5 weeks old because we were PCS-ing. Her pedi and my OB were fine with it because of her uncomplicated birth. Flying at least allows the baby to be close to mom and eat, when they want.

MiahT · October 2013

I had to be hospitalized and had an emergency induction at 37 weeks for medical reasons and even knowing that my LO needed to come out ASAP, I still wish that we could have held out for at least two more weeks. Induced labor usually lasts longer, can be more painful and can carry increased risks to your baby. Not to mention the risks that come with giving birth early in general. If I could have carried my son to thirty-nine weeks, which was the time frame my doctor was hoping to reach before an induction (again, medical reasons) I would have, no matter how inconvient to my schedule it might have been or what events I might have missed. Just an FYI, my induction started on Sunday and I didn't give birth until Tuesday, I had to have medical intervention just to get LO out and by the end we were both in distress because my body was not fully ready for labor. I have nothing against inductions in general, but voluntarily asking for one three weeks early without a medical need is not in the best interests of a child, and is rather selfish of the parent, to be honest.

LaciJaxx · October 2013

Oh gosh. Please don't go forward with having your baby early. There's a reason why a pregnancy is 40 weeks. They need all that time in the womb. As a mother of a preemie, I guarantee it's not worth it. I went into labor at 31 weeks and it was scary. So many things could have gone/been wrong. We are blessed but not everybody is. Inducing at 37 weeks for personal reasons just isn't fair to the baby. And I can't believe your dr is okay with that. Something isn't right there

Oasismomma · October 2013

When DS1 was 2-3 weeks old, we hit the road to join DH (he was TDY). What was supposed to be a 3 hour drive was an almost 7 hour nightmare for so many reasons.

My point? Unnecessarily inducing labor early, besides being a terrible idea for your child, is no guarantee that you'll be able to make your husband's graduation. Please rethink.

KristaU831 · October 2013

that is a terrible idea. induce at 37 weeks so you can make it to boot graduation? um nope. you probably won't make it anyway. taking a 3 week old newborn on a 10 hour drive is almost as terrible of an idea as inducing at 37 weeks.
just don't do it. and your doctor doesn't sound that great if he would induce you so early.
also inductions have a much higher rate of c-section if i remember right... and 3 weeks out from a c-section and 10 hours in a car? yeah no.

the last 3 months of pregnancy are rough but if you have a good support system you will be fine. i know the red cross tells deployed guys when their babies are born if they aren't able to skype/be there. maybe they are the people to call if you have the baby, even though husband is stateside? not sure. your husband can ask someone and find out.

ArmyWife114 · October 2013

KristaU831 said:

that is a terrible idea. induce at 37 weeks so you can make it to boot graduation? um nope. you probably won't make it anyway. taking a 3 week old newborn on a 10 hour drive is almost as terrible of an idea as inducing at 37 weeks.
just don't do it. and your doctor doesn't sound that great if he would induce you so early.
also inductions have a much higher rate of c-section if i remember right... and 3 weeks out from a c-section and 10 hours in a car? yeah no.

the last 3 months of pregnancy are rough but if you have a good support system you will be fine. i know the red cross tells deployed guys when their babies are born if they aren't able to skype/be there. maybe they are the people to call if you have the baby, even though husband is stateside? not sure. your husband can ask someone and find out.

The Red Cross is the correct organization to call when you deliver. They aren't able to tell him until the baby is born. I don't know what information you need to have for him (unit-wise) though.

HisChamaoleGirl · October 2013

Read this article and really consider what you're trying to do to your baby.
https://news.yahoo.com/docs-more-precise-full-term-pregnancy-211424351.html

LaciJaxx · October 2013

LOL. I was just coming to post that article!

HisChamaoleGirl · October 2013

lacijacques said:
LOL. I was just coming to post that article!

Great minds think alike

shellbell9482 · November 2013

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say it.. excuse me for being blunt, but that's what the service has done to me. Get used to doing things by yourself now!! My ex-husband and I were married for 8 years while he was in the service. I saw him for maybe half of it. We have two children together, both of whom I raised almost alone until they were about 5 and 4. With training, schools, deployments, etc., there is not a lot of "alone" time.

Now, here's some rather unpleasant news - please don't let your doctor induce at 37 weeks. U/S measurements are not 100% accurate and you could be off by 2-4 weeks. Lungs are still developing that late in pregnancy and the baby will gain 1/2 pound per week. You are putting your baby at risk. I understand your urgency to get down for his graduation, but (and here's the kicker) after family day and graduation, he's shipped out to AIT the next day. You'll really only have 2 days with him. I would wait and try to join him at his AIT location (depending on where he's going and how long he's there.) I know it's stressful, but being an Army wife is going to have a lot of stressful moments.

I'll add a little sugar to this very tart reply - you are joining a HUGE support network. Get in with the Family Readiness Group (FRG) at his new unit. They (if good) are always willing to help with spouses deploy, go to the field, or are away training/at school. You'll do fine with all the support, I promise, but PLEASE wait and go into labor naturally. Your OB suggesting inducing at 37 weeks seems a little shady to me, even if he is prior service. My SIL is 95 pounds - was 115 when she went into labor with both her kids, and did just fine with TERM babies.. both 39+ weeks.

HisChamaoleGirl · November 2013

I wish we could get an update on this post ...I really hope she didn't go through with it.

Beachy730 · November 2013

calindi said:

HisChamaoleGirl said:

I wish we could get an update on this post ...I really hope she didn't go through with it.

Never, ever going to happen. I'm sure we're all big meanies, and we just don't get her special snowflake circumstances.

And then my infertility brain has me going, "How can this girl, who needs to grow up SO BADLY and is putting her own selfish wants before the best interests of her child, get to be a Mom and I can't seem to get pregnant no matter how long I try?!" Sometimes the world just isn't fair.

Whether or not you think it's fair, I think it's really shitty to basically say that someone deserves to be a mom over another person, regardless of the situation.

KIR2DS4 · November 2013

I want to know what happened too, hopefully all the sound advice against it worked and she changed her mind! I'd like to think so! And we all know life (especially in the military) isn't fair. This is sort of like the "I have cornered the market on missing my husband" argument, and it doesn't sit that well with me either.

Beachy730 · November 2013

If it helps you sleep at night you can try to spin it however you want. Your post reeks of superiority over the OP. And I really don't know how you would read it any other way, even with your further explanation. Even the other poster up there said it didn't sit with her, but yes it's clearly just me being a "miserable hateful person."

Beachy730 · November 2013

Yes, I clearly seek out your responses. From a post that I have already replied on multiple times.

If I see something shitty I call it out, regardless of who wrote it. No, I luckily have not dealt with infertility personally, but that certainly doesn't mean I or other fertile women have no clue how it works. But thanks for implying that we are too stupid to understand something just because it doesn't affect us personally.

Irishcurls · November 2013

steph1977 · December 2013

NSL said:
As the mom of a former NICU baby (who was born at 41 weeks while my H was deployed) this plan is terrible. What happens if your baby has serious health complications from not being ready to be born yet? How will you deal with having a newborn in the NICU knowing that your decision likely put him there? At 37 weeks there's a reasonably good chance that your baby's lungs won't be ready to deal with the outside world. Are you really willing to risk your child's health for the sake of convenience?

Plan to skip the graduation. It's not ideal, but you and your husband's desires don't get to come first anymore when you become parents. Let your baby come when he or she is ready. Having a baby without your spouse there is far from ideal, but it's also not that huge a problem in the long run. Don't make a stupid decision.

I could have written this! I was induced at 41 weeks which led to a c-s and week in the NICU. My DH was deployed as well. PLEASE do not allow the dr to induce at 37 weeks -- it is a terrible idea.

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