Reading Ahead...

MissDemeanor · September 2013

I got out my 'What to expect when you're expecting' book today, and started reading the l&d chapter and about breast feeding. I am now officially freaking out! I'm obviously a FTM, but I do have 15 nieces and nephews. I know how to change diapers, I've been puked on more times than I can count, etc. but for some reason I didn't realize that things like breast feeding could be so hard! My SIL's all bottle fed, so it's something I've never been around much. I plan to breast feed, but kind of assumed that since it was natural, it would feel natural. Now I'm terrified that I won't be able to o it correctly and that it'll be terribly painful! I'm scared to pick the rest of the book up! Lord knows what else is in store that I didn't know about... Has anyone else been hit by the reality freak out?

Winnieella · September 2013

I'm more freaked out by labor. I don't like being in pain. As for breast feeding is there a lactation consultant in your area? They could help with your fear.

sdlaura · September 2013

A lot of women have issues with breastfeeding, but in most cases if you're able to get over the initial hurdles it gets a lot easier. I agree with PP that there are a lot of resources like lactation consultants. One visited us in the hospital and I think that's common practice. Also look for breastfeeding support groups through your hospital. Even though we didn't have BF issues at first, I still found it helpful to go to the support groups.

Also check out the kellymom website - it has a ton of resources.

daleafs · September 2013

Im also worried about BF. My aunt (a mat ward nurse) told me to try and not put too much pressure on yourself but at the same time to be prepared that it might not be natural and will require a lot of effort.

My freak out- gigantic baby. My husband is a big guy (6'3, 200 lbs) I am a petite girl (5'4 130- pre baby...) I used to always joke that I would die carrying his large baby. At my 19 week a/s baby was in the 95th percentile for size (EDD was calculated by 2 early ultrasounds, so dates are accurate) Doctor told me she is not concerned since weight gain can fluctuate so early, but shit just got real for me. Now I have been dreaming about birthing and carrying for an extra large baby! He's gotta come out somehow....

Madelyn0713 · September 2013

I'm nervous about BFing, too. I know it can be really hard and difficult and I'm just scared it won't work out. It's something I really want to do. I'm also getting really scared of delivery - I've been watching DVRed episodes or A Baby Story and some of those experiences are really freaking me out!

azzyberry · September 2013

When I was pregnant with my 1st, breastfeeding terrified me almost more than the thought of labor. Before having kids I was never around babies. My nephew was the last baby in our family and he just turned 20 and before that I was the baby. No one else in my family breastfeed either so I didn'thave anybody to ask about it.

I decided to research it as much as I could and I found that the more I knew the more at ease I was. The one thing I highly recommend is taking a class. That helped me more than anything.

Also, I think its really important to have an open mind about it. Hopefully you'll have a relatively easy time with it, like I did, but you may not. It may be extremely difficult for you or you may have problems that may prevent you from being able to BF and if for whatever reason you can't continue to BF, that is OK. I told myself prior to my DS birth that I was going to give it my best shot and if It doesn't work out, then that's ok and I know I tried my best. I have seen far too many woman put so much pressure on themselves about and if it doesn't work out they are really upset/depressed and that isn't healthy for you or baby.

Best of luck

JordyInIndy · September 2013

Don't freak yourself out before the time even comes. There is a ton of great resources out there to read before your LO gets here. There are also nurses at the hospital who will be more than happy to help. Breast feeding can very hard and can also be painful but like many other things those things can be worked through. Just try not to put too much pressure on yourself. If you can surprise yourself and do it, great but breast feeding isn't for everyone and that's ok too. Good luck with whatever you decide to do.

AmberLoryn2629 · September 2013

I suggest some different reading material in this stage! Something a little more positive and encouraging. IMO, that book should be titled What to Expect When Expecting the Worst! Dr. Sears has The Breastfeeding Book, and I am sure that the ladies on the Breastfeeding Board and the Attachment Parenting Board have some great suggestions for reading material that has a more positive outlook.

micaelasmakeup · October 2013

Walk away from the WTE book. It is cray cray scary!!
A great ENCOURAGING book for BFing is Dr.Sears Baby Book.
Now please please take what you will from this book it's a little crunchy for some. But I personally went from WTE freak out to calm empowered momma, when a friend lent this book to me!:)
Also please check out your local LeLeche group, those women are amazing and very encouraging. Also there are a lot of STM here to help you too!

shellbell3845 · October 2013

Nervous about BFing? No. Terrified. I'm not freaking out about l&d -- except for the epidural. But I'm trying to balance wanting to BF with being so, so scared of the whole thing. Once again, it's nice to know I'm not alone in this.

Kedra231 · October 2013

Being aware that it ISN'T easy for everyone is actually a GREAT thing. It lowers your judgment of others, it makes you more flexible in listening, trying, etc., &, it keeps you from expecting perfection from yourself.

Also, researching for yourself is important, b/c relying on just one course/source of information is rarely a good idea. I had just seen a brief pic in my pregnancy book from Mayo, but it stuck with me, & helped me to question the very bad info I got from my LC. I had massive probs with DD latching, but the lactation consultant kept telling me everything was fine, normal, I would toughen up, etc. Honestly...NO. She was wrong; won't go into details b/c it was pretty bad. I got home & pulled up every La Leche League video on youtube, every article with pics, etc., & her latch was NOT fine. Eventually, it turned out that she just could not/would not latch correctly, no matter what was tried. I pumped exclusively for as long as I could, but I had health problems, milk supply dwindled & died after a bit, pumping or no.

With DS, I was concerned, but determined to try again (brought the pump to the hospital with me this time!), but he was able to latch on correctly, & BF'ing was NOT painful, & it WAS like I'd imagined it would be (more or less).

I did use the clear nipple shields when BF'ing, you can get them in the hospital, & some Targets offer them, too. They look like a floppy piece of silicone, kinda in a Sombrero-type shape with several holes in the tip. They HELP, no matter what the issue is, or even if you don't have an issue.

I hated the Lasinoh cream, but there was a Gerber stick, (it's a twist-up like deodorant), and I apply it to the breast pads, NOT the breast itself, & it works a lot better. It still soothes & moisturizes & protects, but there's no sensitivity or tugging, etc, trying to apply it directly to your breast.

If you do go with a pump in addition, I strongly suggest the electric Medela Pump In Style, the double.

It may take awhile to get the hang of it, & if you're struggling, ask for help, but don't give up if it's not as "easy" or as "natural" as you expected it to be, but also, know when you've hit your limit. If you're really unhappy, & it's taking away from your experience with the baby, then it's time to seriously think about formula feeding, & there's nothing wrong with that, either. DD was on formula by the end of her 4th month, DS at his 8th month, & they're both very healthy, happy kids.
GL.

BB0214 · October 2013

U/O I hate WTE!
I'm afraid of BF and LD. But for me I look at it in the way that I will do what's right for me and ignore judgement.
I agree with Avswolf. Don't be afraid to ask questions.

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