Confused about the negativity

[Deleted User] · September 2013

I come on the bump a lot to see what other people are going through. It helps a lot to see that others are asking similar questions. I've also asked some myself and it's always been helpful to see what you all have to say! Of course I have a doctor and I am fortunate enough to have family but the anonymity of online message boards is of course appealing to us all.

I am a little confused however about some of the negativity on these boards. I debated whether or not I should say anything but I find myself - almost nightly- shaking my head as I read through posts and the responses they have gotten. There seem to be three groups. The nervous mothers who ask a million questions, the people who keep it cool and are more open to whatever people want to do, the judgemental types.
I think I have fallen into all of those groups at one time or another! But I really never find it necessary to comment something really rude or negative. What is the point?
Everyone is different. We are all fr different areas and come from different families and have different beliefs. It's great to compare and contrast but putting people down certainly doesn't make me feel any better about my sore back or my fears of being unable to breastfeed. There are definitely people I could call out on being particularly mean on the bump.
But that would of course be incredibly hypocritical.
Those people would also be the ones that will probably post GIFs of a funny animal playing a violin or that would call me a white knight.
I don't care. I enjoy the helpful responses I have gotten and I have read so many different things on here and I've appreciated all of it.
You e helped ease my nerves during very hard times! And I feel for anyone who has been attacked or judged for any decision they have made or any question they have asked.
Motherhood is a scary thing to approach as an FTM- do what you can! And let's not add to each other's stress. Can't wait to read all of your birth stories!

trackgirlparis · September 2013

Wtf? #-o

bkeane619 · September 2013

First of all....intro yourself if this is your first post on your BMB, it's the polite thing to do. Then we go from there.

Ajoyd · September 2013

Dude, you should totally call someone out. That would've made this worth reading.

SuperSecretStatus · September 2013

Jalee85 · September 2013

Oh OP, it's just the tone of TB in general. I don't see this post going over very well :-q

Gwyneddlesliegrace · September 2013

Oh gawsh. I have never heard this point of view before in the four years I've been on tb... TOTALLY original.

Wino0920 · September 2013

I know, the are constantly hurting my feelings and making me cry.

Alexandrap · September 2013

I didn't read past the 1st paragraph but just GTFO with all that noise alright!

pmarie33 · September 2013

bkeane619 · September 2013

kirbabe · September 2013

Bahahahahahaha.
You know what kills me? If you think this is bad, you should have been around 6 years ago. Or on the knot 10 years ago.

Annnnnnnd I'm old!

Gwyneddlesliegrace · September 2013

kirbabe said:

Bahahahahahaha. You know what kills me? If you think this is bad, you should have been around 6 years ago. Or on the knot 10 years ago. Annnnnnnd I'm old!

I'm just thinking about the trimester boards when I was pregnant with dd1 in 2008. ::shudder::

pmarie33 · September 2013

Come on Alex, you knew this wouldn't go well.

[Deleted User] · September 2013

The user and all related content has been deleted.

tmccord21 · September 2013

:::insert oh brother gif::: damn mobile

--halo-- · September 2013

Regarding the massive flaming that is about to ensue:

bnikiz · September 2013

Op you should read this
https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12066976/how-to-tell-if-you-are-a-newb/p1

MtnChickaD · September 2013

mommyilene · September 2013

Personally I think it's all the hormones and estrogen clashing. I don't let it get to me though and you shouldn't either. Like pp said if you've been lurking or not very active you should have known that this post would not have gone over well.

yesthisiskim0401 · September 2013

You know what? You are so right. We are so mean, all the time, and it just needs to stop. You have completely opened my eyes and have changed my ways.

Said no wolf pack member, ever.

Go to Baby Center. Bye.

Amjoy25 · September 2013

Amjoy25 · September 2013

tmccord21 said:

:::insert oh brother gif::: damn mobile

You're welcome

SuperSecretStatus · September 2013

mommyilene said:
Personally I think it's all the hormones and estrogen clashing. I don't let it get to me though and you shouldn't either. Like pp said if you've been lurking or not very active you should have known that this post would not have gone over well.

It really has nothing to do with hormones.

HFrizzle · September 2013

Sure we call people out and give them shit for stupid things, but did you fail to notice all the support we give each other. I don't know how many times I've wished someone good luck/congratulations this weekend because they either ended up in L&D, were in labor or had a baby.

To most of us, honesty is the best policy and if you're doing something ridiculous, you're going to be called out.

scamberlous3000 · September 2013

Ugh. No one cares. That is all.

chelseyestelle · September 2013

Obligatory "lets be nice to one another post" for the month from some stranger... Check.

trackgirlparis · September 2013

comeongetdown said:
If you've actually been around and read posts, you'd know this wouldn't go over well.

I'm due next week, I don't have time for this shit.

CANT BELIEVE YOURE DUE NEXT WEEK LB!!!

\:D/

Slap8out · September 2013

Shit, I don't post that often, but even I know that bitching about getting your feelings hurt and crying about groups being mean is really ridiculous. Our due dates are right around the corner, as pp said " we don't have time for this shit!" Best of luck to you. No sympathy here.