Things people say that annoy me:

emmanemm · September 2013

I feel like I haven't seen one of these in awhile. If someone's posted one recently, I apologize. Dh's family is driving me nuts lately.

So things that they say that annoy me:

1. MIL and FIL constantly tell me I am spoiling M by holding her so much and picking her up whenever she cries. Um, what am I supposed to do? Continue my conversation with you while my daughter is screaming? According to our pedi you cannot spoil a baby this young. FIL is a NICU nurse and thinks he knows everything. I talked to pedi about it and he says, FIL is wrong and very old fashioned when it comes to children. Ugh, they drive me nuts.
2. SIL always says she doesn't understand why I don't give M cows milk. You heard me right, COWS MILK to a newborn! She says, "I gave mine cows milk from day one and they're both fine." I just want to scream, "are you dumb? You're lucky they're fine!" Drives me up a wall. But she's one that constantly tells me I need to start giving her cereal as well. I just don't understand why she thinks she gets a say in what I feed dd. M is healthy and getting fed, why does she feel the need to "fix" her eating habits? I just don't get it.

Anyone else heard anything stupid lately?

KMRR86 · September 2013

My MIL asked me a few weeks ago, when Lily was just over a month old, if she was eating solids yet (she was serious). I rolled my eyes and said yah she had a full steak dinner last night and she loved it.

thegoodpotato · September 2013

Sometimes I feel a little judgy about other people's parenting decisions (like growing little boys' hair out to girl length). Then I remind myself about a saying I saw on Facebook once (forgive me, I'm paraphrasing because I don't remember the actual words, but here's the gist):

"One time I went to Starbucks and the guy ahead of me ordered an espresso. It made me SO FREAKIN MAD that he didn't order a drink that I like."

I use this to remind myself that everyone has their own style, and of they're not harming or endangering their child, to keep my snooty opinion to myself... And to stop being so snooty.

You should use this on your relatives when they're being judgy-wudgy. Or maybe it would be too subtle and they wouldn't get it....

Although, you have to remember that leaving babies to cry was likely standard practice in your IL's era, and none of us was emotionally scarred, so they still feel its the right thing to do. A nice reminder to them that everyone parents differently might be warranted.

My MIL thinks its ridiculous that I insist on breast feeding because she thinks it's too difficult and too much effort. Thank goodness she lives on the other side of the country. Plus I'm a stubborn bitch and I've let her know what my opinion is, and that she can stay out of my parenting.

bumpuser8571475 · September 2013

My friend who doesn't have any kids, always acts like a know it all when it comes to babies. She was over visiting and LO made a noise while sleeping and she said "That's a hunger noise.." Umm no. I know what she sounds like when she's hungry and that wasn't it. She also asked me if I started giving her water yet. Umm again no. She's too young for water.

Also, SIL says that we're spoiling LO by picking her up too much and that we have a needy baby. Yea thanks for that. She also elected to have an early C/S, over feeds her baby (her pedi said she needs to cut back), and prevents her baby from napping so he'll sleep better at night. But do I ever say anything to her? Of course not because its none of my business.

heyhaylee · September 2013

I'm told by my dh's family that we need to "share" our baby. Um no. She is a person first of all, not an object I share. Second of all, you haven't even asked to see the baby since we were in the hospital. Make an effort and I might not be a b!tch every time your name is mentioned.

Also, I'm only like that because it hurts hubby's feelings so bad.

Fitnessteach2010 · September 2013

I'm just sick of the following:
1. Does she sleep through the night?
2. When are you having another baby?
3. I get the rice cereal thing a lot too.
4. Does the dog behave?

PrimRoseMama · September 2013

1.) You cannot spoil a baby this young. That is very old, outdated thinking. It seems to have been some "thing" when our parents were growing up or told or something stupid. For whatever reason that seems to be the advice from older generations. The bottom line is that you can't spoil them by holding them too much. End of story. Trust your pediatrician on that.

2.) Your SIL is an idiot. Tell her that she did things her way and you are going to do things your way. End of story. That you'd really rather not hear about it from her anymore. Yes, she might be butthurt but I promise she will STFU. Sometimes you have to put your foot down.

I did that with my MIL and while she was butthurt (and drama) she has stopped giving me unsolicited advice for the most part. Not that she doesn't tell me what she thinks the proper way is all the time, but none of this "you should do X" bullshit. She knows I'm going to parent my way and she needs to STFU about it.

Nothing stupid has been said to me lately. Perhaps its because folks know that I will tell them to fucking can it.

Yeah, sleep deprivation is not kind to my temper.

amandarins · September 2013

Mil asking if he can sleep over. No, you can't borrow my infant to play mommy.
Mil asking if I asked my pedi when I can give him water. Wtf? Why the hell would he need water!??!?
And people asking me if I think he's spoiled.

Lelo2006 · September 2013

"Are you nursing?"
The other day we were at the blood draw lab for James and there was an old couple sitting in the waiting room. James was so bored by then because he had just gotten his ultrasound on his hips and had not napped well. He was fussing a little while my MIL bounced him. The old lady kept saying "oh he's hungry ... Sounds like he's hungry... I think it's food time." Finally, "are you nursing?" It's just so rude to try to tell people what their kid wants. And yes, I'm nursing, but that's a personal question and what if I wasn't?

KMRR86 · September 2013

lalvillar06 said:
"Are you nursing?"

Yah what is this?? Everyone asks me this... I'm tempted to say no once just to see what the response is. The baby is fed, that's all that matters.

khays8785 · September 2013

LadyBlue07 said:
The first time my husband's parents saw E she was crying and they kept telling us it was a hungry cry. They had been in the house for two minutes. The answer to crying is not to stuff them with food.

I am constantly under fire with the "oh look he's hungry! " from my ILs who over fed SIL so much as a baby their pedi told them to slow down on the formula..
I also have a friend whose answer to her son's crying is a bottle, every time. He's in 18 mo clothes at 7 mo old..

Hilaboo86 · September 2013

I'm tired of my family saying its time for Eva to sleep in her crib.
A- she sleeps for three hours at a time and I don't want to walk in there
B- I'm not ready for her to
C- I'm her freaking parent, and I didn't ask for your advice

ceechie · September 2013

This is a super popular post with moms of multiples. Apparently, we are freaks of nature.
1. Are they twins?
Really? Two babies, in a double stroller, dressed alike...
2. Are you nursing both?!?
3. Are they natural?
Well they aren't robots.. And that's kinda personal.
4. Wow, how do you leave the house?
Through the door...

Bkuhman · September 2013

I may forget a few but I have a lot. My husbands grandma is flucking crazy! I feel like telling her to STFU.
Anyways.. Here's mine:

1. You're feeding him too much!
2. Is he on a schedule yet?
3. You hold him too much!
4. You have him spoiled from holding him so much!
5. You can give him water now.
6. When are you going to have another one?
7. Oh honey, you don't eat enough.
8. How many times a day do you feed him?!?!
9. Oh, it'll get worse.
10. You should let him CIO, he will be okay!
11. You should buy a watch and time te feedings and burp him x amounts of times throughout a feeding.
12. You should take the base out of your car and just use the carseat alone!
13. You know you can get pregnant while breastfeeding, right?!
14. Don't forget to use condoms during sex!
15. Are you getting your tubes tied?
16. Have you talked to your doctor about tying your tubes yet?

I'm sure I left out a good Bit. We see her tomorrow, I'm sure I will have more then

merc5411 · September 2013

My top are:
1. Are you giving him water? It's hot outside!
2. Are you breastfeeding? How's it going?
3. A small amount of spit up looks like a lot. (This one burns my biscuits. I'm a RN. I know what 30 mls looks like)
4. Just give him some rice cereal.
5. How do you know it's a milk allergy? All babies are fussy.

Gotta love people!

jennipalmer · September 2013

My ex MIL told me I need to lose the baby weight I am not getting any younger...in the middle of DDs school open house.
Other wise other people don't bug me to much

thegoodpotato · September 2013

ramy3695 said:

Most people who know me know better than to give me stupid advice. The most annoying thing to me is when people assume I'm done having kids because I have a boy and a girl.

This would annoy me. My parents had a boy and a girl (me) and went on to have a third (my sister). We have two girls, but if Amanda had been a boy, I would have still been planning a third.

Stina2012 · September 2013

ceechie said:
This is a super popular post with moms of multiples. Apparently, we are freaks of nature.
1. Are they twins?
Really? Two babies, in a double stroller, dressed alike...
2. Are you nursing both?!?
3. Are they natural?
Well they aren't robots.. And that's kinda personal.
4. Wow, how do you leave the house?
Through the door...

The are they natural question is so offensive! Like, who do you think you are to get to know that history?

lrichmond86 · September 2013

My family is super passive aggressive so what I get the most is things like "oh, she's grown so much since we saw her (x) weeks ago..." or "it's been so long since we got to see her". Sounds innocent enough, but it's said with side eyes and is meant as a zinger toward me. First off, I have four living grandparents and seven aunts and uncles who all want to see her in addition to my parent and sister. Dh's parents are divorced, so there's them and his step parents, plus he has six aunts and uncles. We both work five data a week and barely see each other in the evening. We're doing the best we can, people! If you want to see her call and ask! The phone works both ways!

Lelo2006 · September 2013

^^ I totally feel you! My family doesn't do this as much but I feel like people underestimate how difficult it is to get all the baby's things, get them in the car seat, get out of the house, then go visit someone. It's so much easier if people just come to your place!

danielledunning · September 2013

lrichmond86 said:
My family is super passive aggressive so what I get the most is things like "oh, she's grown so much since we saw her (x) weeks ago..." or "it's been so long since we got to see her". Sounds innocent enough, but it's said with side eyes and is meant as a zinger toward me. First off, I have four living grandparents and seven aunts and uncles who all want to see her in addition to my parent and sister. Dh's parents are divorced, so there's them and his step parents, plus he has six aunts and uncles. We both work five data a week and barely see each other in the evening. We're doing the best we can, people! If you want to see her call and ask! The phone works both ways!

My aunts love to call my mom and complain about me not taking the baby to see them. They expect me to call and initiate visits. My mom has finally listened to me and started telling them that I said they'll see him at thanksgiving..

emmanemm · September 2013

lalvillar06 said:
^^ I totally feel you! My family doesn't do this as much but I feel like people underestimate how difficult it is to get all the baby's things, get them in the car seat, get out of the house, then go visit someone. It's so much easier if people just come to your place!

Yes! My SIL actually had the nerve to throw a bitch fit to mil because I didn't answer a text from her. Um, hello! I have a newborn! Plus, I don't want to talk to you because you're an idiot. Ugh, she infuriates me.

Stina2012 · September 2013

1) Anything that comes out of the IL mouths.

2) Why don't you put her down on/in X baby gear. While she's hysterically crying.

3) Don't you think she'd be more comfortable if you put her down? Passive-Aggressive way of saying #2!

JTA2426 · September 2013

ceechie said:
This is a super popular post with moms of multiples. Apparently, we are freaks of nature.
1. Are they twins?
Really? Two babies, in a double stroller, dressed alike...
2. Are you nursing both?!?
3. Are they natural?
Well they aren't robots.. And that's kinda personal.
4. Wow, how do you leave the house?
Through the door...

All of this. I also get "A boy and a girl?" No, two boys. Is that ok with you? Or would you rather be able to ask if I'm done? My least favorite is asking if I took fertility drugs. No, but it's none of your business. Other things I hate:

1. Do twins run in your family? Your husbands?
2. They're so small!
3. You're being too rough with them. (my MIL)
4. "Their cries are so weird!" What does a normal cry sound like? Thought they were all a little different but I guess my kids are strange.

karen0477 · September 2013

Oh, there are so many to choose from.....

Yes, I know what causes this and Imwill still know when we have #4, stop asking

My mom saying "you know, it would be nice for me to have the baby for an afternoon".......oh by all means, take her, nevermind tgat I dont feel the need for a break or want to ve away from her, but lets make this all about you, like normal.......

Is she hungry, is she hungrg, is she hungry......no, she just ate, just becausd she fusses does not mean shes hungry......and no you cant feed her......

Anything medical related.......I know I went to nursing school as an adult and you must think I didnt graduate, but please stop giving me medical advice about my children, its under control......

Thats just a few and mainly related to things my mom isconstantly saying, makes me nuts.......

[Deleted User] · September 2013

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[Deleted User] · September 2013

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maryoosa · September 2013

I really hate "Is he good?" Um. He's not even 2 months old---so, it's not like he's had a chance to be bad. I usually respond with "He's an easy baby."

Also, it occasionally comes up that we adopted him. Then I get "Where did you get him from?" "Didn't his mother love him?"
And I have a whole lotta answers for both of those questions.

And of course the requisite, you hold him too much, you should give him cereal etc.

Clyde013 · September 2013

jennuinne said:

lalvillar06 said:
"Are you nursing?"
The other day we were at the blood draw lab for James and there was an old couple sitting in the waiting room. James was so bored by then because he had just gotten his ultrasound on his hips and had not napped well. He was fussing a little while my MIL bounced him. The old lady kept saying "oh he's hungry ... Sounds like he's hungry... I think it's food time." Finally, "are you nursing?" It's just so rude to try to tell people what their kid wants. And yes, I'm nursing, but that's a personal question and what if I wasn't?
Everyone asks this, including a random lady in the Dr.'s office waiting room. No, I tried for weeks pumping, etc. and never produced milk. Thanks for asking.

I too have gotten this nursing question so many times and it's a sore spot for me because I really really wanted to nurse but it didn't work out that way for me. So I get so irritated when asked by total strangers. Also my extended family and family friends all called my parents to see how E is doing and they all ask If I'm nursing. I really want to say flick off and hang up.

[Deleted User] · September 2013

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Jruela13 · September 2013

My dad and his wife who I cannot stand are always making comments such as: 1. She needs water, breast milk doesn't have any 2. Don't pick her up when she is crying, she is already manipulating you! Are you kidding me?! 3. I really really can't stand when my dad tells me everytime he sees her that I'm bored with her right now and at six months I will start enjoying her. I know what he means, however I'm sure he would not be bored if he was the one breastfeeding and getting no sleep lol. 4. Don't be naive and believe everything her doctor tells you, ummm I'm a labor and delivery nurse, I think I would know if it was BS! 5. My grandmother always says she is cold and she needs socks, a beanie and blanket in 90 degree weather when she is already sweating!

KMSonn · September 2013

1. Have you wrote ______ a thank you card yet?

2. What a big baby! She's huge!

3. Is she sleeping through the night yet?

4. Is she a good baby?

5. When are you coming to visit?

6. When can I babysit?

7. She's dreaming of angels!!

My favorite...
8. Well I did it this way and my kids turned out okay!

And then anything my grandmother or MIL say...

babyk1228 · September 2013

Oh my, where to even begin? Sooo much stoopid..

1. Are you nursing? Yes, but WTF on earth does it matter to you?
2. The typical 'spoiling' by holding him..
3. MIL drives me nuts how if I'm holding him and he's not eating she just comes over to me and literally says 'give him to me' or 'let me see him' and just takes him to hold, even tho I so just want to say no. I pretend he needs to eat all the time to take him back.
4. MIL is always trying to convince me to let her 'have him for a night'. Heck no! I hate the one evening a week you watch him when I'm in class bad enough but you're free, no way would I willingly give him to you for a night just for funsies?
5. Idk why it bugs me when people say 'aw he's so small' because he is almost 14lbs and not two months yet. Actually he's huge, ask my vagina if he was small, shows how much you know about babies stranger..
6. MIL texting me all the time saying 'how's my boy' or something similar. He does not belong to you, in case you somehow missed that?? What I would pay for the woman to move across the country, jeebus.
6. And to sum this list up - 99% of all unsolicited advice is annoying because its usually some BS or something I already know.

gutsymama · September 2013

I expect some comments when we're out with Luke in his wagon taking walks around the hospital, but I still cringe/don't know what to say when:

- people comment on how small he is (he seems huge to me now - he's 12 pounds! And he started out at 5, and his neighbor started at 14 oz. So yeah, 12 lbs. seems like a pretty big kid to me, even when I try to detach myself and get some perspective!)

- people ask what's wrong with him. Um, he was born. I've been threatening to start asking them if they've seen that movie, Benjamin Button, because this is my grandpa....

- people ask what's wrong with her/ how old she is. Um, she is wearing blue dinosaurs and has a nametag on her wagon that says Lucas. I'm sorry I ignored you at point blank, old lady, but maybe next time mind your own fucking business. Also, don't ask what's wrong with her because she's probably a pretty fucking cool kid that's just having some extra speedbumps.

gutsymama · September 2013

Laurendag said:

When coworkers say "oh are you sure your due date wasn't off?" Yes, with all of my ultrasounds and measuring. My due date was FIVE WHOLE WEEKS off and the doctors never figured it out. No you stupid fluck.

I got this several times in the NICU since Luke didn't have any trouble breathing or nippling. It's great that he didn't have extra things to overcome - but we had an u/s at 7w4d where he still looked like a tadpole. We're pretty certain. And it makes it that much harder to keep confirming it.

Laura723 · September 2013

People ask how I'm feeling. All. The. Time. Well folks, my baby is 3 months old. Besides being tired, I feel great! How long to people think it takes to recover from childbirth?!

babyk1228 · September 2013

maryannespier said:
"Oh, he's big. Did you have him naturally?"
Not that the size of my pelvis and my ability to squeeze out a baby is any of your business, but yeah, I had a c section.

Yes, this! (To the people who recognize he is big). And to me 'natural' is med free, and as much I wish he was fully 'natural' I had an epi so I'm always like 'no, I had an epidural but yes I delivered him...vaginally'. It's kinda awkward to say 'vaginally' to a complete stranger because your vagina suddenly becomes apparent in the conversation, but I guess that's what they get for asking...

jennipalmer · September 2013

Yaybaby01 said:

maryannespier said:
"Oh, he's big. Did you have him naturally?"
Not that the size of my pelvis and my ability to squeeze out a baby is any of your business, but yeah, I had a c section.
Yes, this! (To the people who recognize he is big). And to me 'natural' is med free, and as much I wish he was fully 'natural' I had an epi so I'm always like 'no, I had an epidural but yes I delivered him...vaginally'. It's kinda awkward to say 'vaginally' to a complete stranger because your vagina suddenly becomes apparent in the conversation, but I guess that's what they get for asking...

This is what I say to because natural to me would be all natural with no epi. When people asked me this 13 yrs ago with my DD I said no I had epi. They then clarified c section or vaginal.
Also the looks when I say the weights of all babies is creepy like I have big hoohaa. I just walk away because I don't want to discuss that it is hips bones that matter not skin that stretches or tears.

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