18 weeks and no movement - freaking out.

jenniejuniper1 · September 2013

Hi everyone,

I haven't posted in a while - normally I just enjoy reading other people's posts and comments. But everyone I know keeps asking me "ooh what's it like to feel the baby move? They must be kicking up a storm in there!".. I'm 18 weeks and haven't felt anything. Or at least, I don't think I have.. maybe something very very subtle now and then but I have no means of distinguishing it from normal digestive feelings. All my friends who have had babies talk about the movements they started feeling at 14 and 15 weeks and I've got nothing. I'm getting really upset. I don't have another ultrasound for two weeks and if I don't feel anything soon I think I'm going to lose it. I just want to know that everything's okay in there. I don't know what to do!

Noethola · September 2013

Some moms dont feel the baby until after 20 weeks. Sometimes it depends on where your placenta is placed whether or not you can feel the baby.

If you are a FTM, it can be hard to distinguish those first flutters. Dont give up hope!

Soap1 · September 2013

Normal.

ziggy903 · September 2013

It's normal to start feeling movement around 18-22 weeks. Hang in there, LO will start moving around soon!

ramfan05 · September 2013

Just wanted to reassure you that it is completely normal for a FTM to not feel any movement until about 18-22 weeks. It's really unusual for a FTM to feel movement by 14-15 weeks, so listen to your friends' experiences with a grain of salt. You may start to feel movement before your u/s, you may see movement during your u/s and realize that you are feeling it. I know that at my a/s last time (around 20 weeks) I could see the baby moving and still couldn't feel it. It drove me nuts! A week or so later, I started feeling regular movements. It will come!

christen_z1 · September 2013

Try not to worry! It is normal still at this point.

Codypup · September 2013

Calm down, take a deep breath. This is totally normal. A lot of women don't feel anything definitive until 21-22 weeks! For some women, it's even later. There are soooo many factors that go into when you feel movement.

Try and stay calm and remember that you're normal. Call your doc if you continue to panic.

micaelasmakeup · September 2013

What some of you guys feel about name post I feel about these posts!
Your little bump emails you get once a week tell you when it's normal to feel baby.
I feel like we get more of these then name posts. At least a name post is asking opinions this is asking a fact that you can pretty much google in 2secs. And DEF do a search that toms of people have asked this same ?.

Amyjoy1972 · September 2013

My first pregnancy I didn't feel anything until I was over 20 weeks

morsey2011 · September 2013

I love when people make comments to pregnant women as if all pregnancies are the same. People said the same thing to me about movement with my first. I didn't feel anything (or at least didn't know what I was feeling) until I was 21 weeks along. And even then, she had to kick me before I knew what it was. You're fine.

adeleon829 · September 2013

I'm 19 weeks today and haven't felt anything yet either! Don't worry! Everything is fine !

ahare2009 · September 2013

I'm at 19w3d and may or may not have felt the baby. Whatever I have felt hasn't been consisted, so I am not convinced. I posted a link a week or two ago that stated FTM may not feel anything up to 25 weeks.

https://www.medicinenet.com/fetal_movement_feeling_baby_kick_week-by-week/article.htm

micaelasmakeup · September 2013

njb750 said:

car seat said:

micaelasmakeup said:

What some of you guys feel about name post I feel about these posts! Your little bump emails you get once a week tell you when it's normal to feel baby. I feel like we get more of these then name posts. At least a name post is asking opinions this is asking a fact that you can pretty much google in 2secs. And DEF do a search that toms of people have asked this same ?.
Right, but I also see the difference between asking someone for advice when you're scared and asking for help from strangers about naming your child.

THIS. OP is obviously very scared. I don't recommend searching the internet for much. I find it only freaks me out more. This place is a great resource for support from STM for FTM. I hope OP finds comfort in all these posts! ((big hugs OP!))

Listen I'm not the biggest fan of name posts either! But I'm 19w today and both BC and TB emails said something to the effect of No worries if you are not feeling LO yet...
So can she not read her emails just like I can? I'm picking on OP when it's not just her by any means. Just after the tailspin yesterday, I'm just annoyed at both.

RondackHiker · September 2013

I don't read my bump email. Ever. It's sorted directly into my junk folder.

Even if it isn't, not everyone reads it.

Some people use fake emails to sign up for things like this.

Perhaps she did read them but when everyone around her tells her they felt it weeks ago and act worried that she hasn't, it's hard not to worry.

I don't mind posts from worried moms.

ziggy903 · September 2013

RondackHiker said:
I don't read my bump email. Ever. It's sorted directly into my junk folder.

Even if it isn't, not everyone reads it.

Some people use fake emails to sign up for things like this.

Perhaps she did read them but when everyone around her tells her they felt it weeks ago and act worried that she hasn't, it's hard not to worry.

I don't mind posts from worried moms.

I use a fake email and name for TB. Many people don't read them.

Even if she did, she's freaking out. A worried mother and one who can't decide between two dumb names are two very different things.

micaelasmakeup · September 2013

Whatever.

jenniejuniper1 · September 2013

Thank you so much to everyone who responded to my post - I've Googled it a number of times (even though everyone keeps telling me to stay away from Dr.Google) and website after website talks about how women with a 'slim build' can feel movements as early as 16 weeks, etc. To make my anxiety worse, I've got a very slim build and I'm noticeably showing, which seems to prompt everyone to go on about how "that baby must be keeping you up at night moving around, eh??" which just gives me a dreadful feeling when I have to reply "nope.. crickets so far." I'm getting a little tired of the concerned looks people are giving me. Ah! As if we don't have enough on our minds already!

So thanks everyone for helping me out with my little vent. When the books, internet and even friends make you feel deficient, it's so nice to have a crew of women who have been there before give you their honest opinions and experiences!!

becausemom · September 2013

jenniejuniper1 said:
Thank you so much to everyone who responded to my post - I've Googled it a number of times (even though everyone keeps telling me to stay away from Dr.Google) and website after website talks about how women with a 'slim build' can feel movements as early as 16 weeks, etc. To make my anxiety worse, I've got a very slim build and I'm noticeably showing, which seems to prompt everyone to go on about how "that baby must be keeping you up at night moving around, eh??" which just gives me a dreadful feeling when I have to reply "nope.. crickets so far." I'm getting a little tired of the concerned looks people are giving me. Ah! As if we don't have enough on our minds already!

So thanks everyone for helping me out with my little vent. When the books, internet and even friends make you feel deficient, it's so nice to have a crew of women who have been there before give you their honest opinions and experiences!!

I'm glad you're feeling more at ease.

Kmward488 · September 2013

micaelasmakeup said:
What some of you guys feel about name post I feel about these posts!
Your little bump emails you get once a week tell you when it's normal to feel baby.
I feel like we get more of these then name posts. At least a name post is asking opinions this is asking a fact that you can pretty much google in 2secs. And DEF do a search that toms of people have asked this same ?.

What is wrong with you? I don't know if you've ever googled anything before, but it can be scary and very discouraging. The bump emails don't specifically say a week when she should feel baby move. It truly varies from woman to woman.

You shouldn't ever be rude to someone who has a legimitate fear- All you are doing is making other women think twice before submitting a post when they are worried about something and could just as easily google it. You should be ashamed of yourself and your reaction to the worried woman's post.

CChef07 · September 2013

Just echoing everyone else here (I think you can never hear it enough)...it's totally normal. I had an ultrasound at 17 weeks and he was moving like crazy, but I didn't feel anything. I am almost 19 weeks and starting to feel definite movements. And remember, every pregnancy truly is very different.

Mazingmommyof6 · September 2013

This is my 6th baby and I have only felt a few little " blips ".

Kmward488 · September 2013

Jaysmommy06 said:

jenniejuniper1 said:
Thank you so much to everyone who responded to my post - I've Googled it a number of times (even though everyone keeps telling me to stay away from Dr.Google) and website after website talks about how women with a 'slim build' can feel movements as early as 16 weeks, etc. To make my anxiety worse, I've got a very slim build and I'm noticeably showing, which seems to prompt everyone to go on about how "that baby must be keeping you up at night moving around, eh??" which just gives me a dreadful feeling when I have to reply "nope.. crickets so far." I'm getting a little tired of the concerned looks people are giving me. Ah! As if we don't have enough on our minds already!

So thanks everyone for helping me out with my little vent. When the books, internet and even friends make you feel deficient, it's so nice to have a crew of women who have been there before give you their honest opinions and experiences!!
So glad you are feeling better! I'm 16 weeks and am worried that I haven't felt LO move yet either, but have realized we are ALL different! Everyone tells me I'm crazy, but I'm just so excited for when I am able to feel LO move! Hope you start to feel first kicks here soon as well!

Edit: Don't know why it's in grey!

azzyberry · September 2013

I'm 19 weeks and haven't felt the baby yet. I didn't feel my DS till around 24 weeks and my DD till 22 weeks. Its completely normal so try not to stress.

micaelasmakeup · September 2013

I'm stepping away today. I think I need a snickers bar;) I'm annoyed at things that don't normally bother me. Ill take a bump break/TO. I'm usually nice right?

BzeetyD · September 2013

My OB told me not to expect feeling anything until 20w or more. I have an anterior (front) placenta and might not feel things as quickly as others and even after that it might not be consistent or often.

I had brunch with friend who also had an AP and she said it was 22w when she felt something and then rarely felt kicks until she was far into her 3rd tri.

Kmward488 · September 2013

micaelasmakeup said:
I'm stepping away today. I think I need a snickers bar;) I'm annoyed at things that don't normally bother me. Ill take a bump break/TO. I'm usually nice right?

A snickers bar sounds so good right now! Hope your mood improves, we all have those moody days! Unfortunately I think it's another fun part of being pregnant!

JackieP1023 · September 2013

I just reached 19 weeks today. I've not felt any regular movement yet... And with my first pregnancy, I was barely starting to feel flutters between 19 and 20 when we started having issues (our daughter was stillborn at 20 weeks due to IC). I thought I felt a kick last week, but not 100% sure-hubby thinks I'm crazy! I've felt more rolling/twisting-type movements than kicks, and even those aren't regular. Don't worry!!

ziggy903 · September 2013

micaelasmakeup said:
I'm stepping away today. I think I need a snickers bar;) I'm annoyed at things that don't normally bother me. Ill take a bump break/TO. I'm usually nice right?

You are usually wonderful! Get yourself some candy

djtippietoes · September 2013

I haven't felt anything at 18 weeks. I just had an a/s yesterday and there was definitely a baby in there.

RondackHiker · September 2013

ziggy903 said:

micaelasmakeup said:
I'm stepping away today. I think I need a snickers bar;) I'm annoyed at things that don't normally bother me. Ill take a bump break/TO. I'm usually nice right?
You are usually wonderful! Get yourself some candy

Definitely candy time. You're normally sweet!

OP: people will scare you all the time. "You're too big, something is wrong." "You're too small, something is wrong." "He's cranky after eating? Something is wrong." "She has how many dirty diapers? Oh that's bad." "He's not rolling yet? Most babies roll by now. Is your doctor worried?"

Ignore them.

Firefly9 · September 2013

When I asked to listen to the heartbeat at one of my progesterone shot appointments (17w6d), I told her I'd felt DS at that point, but hadn't felt this one, and the nurse said it's still very early. Give it a few more weeks

ErinGoBragh77 · September 2013

I didn't feel DS until after week 21! I'm sure all is fine!

melissandow · September 2013

I just saw my OB this morning and am 19 weeks 4 days. She had a difficult time finding the heartbeat with the Doppler but the one things she heard a lot of was baby moving. She finally found the heartbeat too. I don't think I have been feeling anything because I have. Had suck terrible gas but I think I can start feeling things that I never expected to be baby. I too was freaking out but no worries!

wheathergirl · September 2013

I'll be 18 weeks tomorrow and so far I've felt nothing yet either. I was starting to freak out too being a FTM. Thanks for writing this post so I know I'm not alone in not feeling the baby yet!

cksmith29 · September 2013

Everyone is different, and this is a great place to ask others of their experience. I hope you feel reassured that everything is OK.

cattuccino · September 2013

RondackHiker said:

ziggy903 said:

micaelasmakeup said:
I'm stepping away today. I think I need a snickers bar;) I'm annoyed at things that don't normally bother me. Ill take a bump break/TO. I'm usually nice right?
You are usually wonderful! Get yourself some candy
Definitely candy time. You're normally sweet!

OP: people will scare you all the time. "You're too big, something is wrong." "You're too small, something is wrong." "He's cranky after eating? Something is wrong." "She has how many dirty diapers? Oh that's bad." "He's not rolling yet? Most babies roll by now. Is your doctor worried?"

Ignore them.

This. I'm particularly fond of the above statements coming from people who are not/never have been pregnant/a parent.

(Even if they were, every one is different)

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