Are you done?

sweetann1 · August 2013

As my little one is getting older I feel the twinge for a baby again. But the issue is he was supposed to be my baby! He was my second and has been a handful. I'm really torn right now because having a third for us would be a major lifestyle change. I couldn't work bc childcare would be costly for three. And I don't do very well not working (mentally). I do like getting out of the house. And money would be tight, might have to sell our house, and cut my oldest activities out? I just get very upset when some friends of mine are having their 3rd. Because it seems so sad I won't be able to experience that again. But I am scared of being pg again bc I have horrible preg, labors and depression all associated with it. But it only last 9 months! Any advice?

Oasismomma · August 2013

Do you have to make the decision right away? You have a lot of fctors to consider, but some of those may change with time. We've decided that if we have a third, we will space them out a bit more than our first 2, who will be 25+ months apart. DS might even be in kindergarten or older before we have a hypothetical third child, which means we wouldn't have two kids in day care at once if I were working.

Also, every pregnancy, labor, and postpartum period is different.

jesselayne8 · August 2013

For us having a 3rd child wouldn't change the day to day. I stay at home so daycare isn't an issue. We have 4 bedrooms so our house is big enough. We plan waiting a little longer this time (1&2 are 17 months apart).

-T- · August 2013

I feel a twinge of jealousy when I hear one of my friends is expecting. I don't know if that will ever completely go away. We are definitely planning on waiting about a year or so before we would TTC. I would like to have several years between my first 2, though that was not my original plan. I am young so I do have age on my side. If you have the option of waiting a couple years until your 2 kids are in school so daycare is cheaper, I see that as being an option. That way you don't rule a 3rd out right away, just not right now.

Smgrochowski · August 2013

I'm glad to hear I'm not alone. Two is what we can afford and what I can handle... Sometimes it seems like too much to handle! A third is not a logical option, and 99% of the time I understand. But there is that 1% that would like the excitement of expecting and the snuggles of a newborn.

Leap08 · August 2013

What does your husband think? Can you take some time to think about it? It's a big decision.

I'm done. I had two easy pregnancies and have two beautiful girls. My husband and I aren't young parents, and I kind of feel like trying for a 3rd might be pressing our luck. I'm also not comfortable with the type of lifestyle changes we would have to make to have a 3rd child. Some good friends of ours just had a baby last week. I look at her and think how sweet she looks and I kind of miss the newborn snuggly stage. And then I think about the sleepless nights and breastfeeding every 2 hours. I think about how much easier life is now and how we've fallen into a really good rhythm, and I'm glad the newborn days are behind us.

TonyaCody06 · August 2013

Adding the 3rd was easy as far as parenting goes. You already know how to juggle more than one and recognize who really needs the immediate help. I can't help you with the financial part. I ended up pulling my 3 out of daycare due to cost after an unsuccessful job search. Being a SAHM was not my plan and it is HARD work.

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