November 2013 Moms

Seriously? You brought your kid?

I do not understand WHY women think it is ok to bring your child to an OB appointment.
What if the doc needs to do an impromptu vag check?
I will fully admit I don't like other people's children. Please, do not bring your child and run let them play loud games on your phone. Also, do not have loud conversations with 3-4 year old concerning the size of my belly vs. the size of my baby!
I am a second time mom and I would never bring my 4yo to a Dr. Vag appointment!

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Re: Seriously? You brought your kid?

  • I am guilty of this.  The appointments I brought DS to were last minute ones because something wasn't right and most of the time DH is able to meet me there and keep an eye on him while I'm being seen.
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  • I can understand that. I am sitting between 2 different sets of women with kids and there are more in the large waiting room. If someone has an emergency thats fine, but I still think you should be courteous and keep the kid quiet That's a general you, fiddlefern. Maybe I am just a biotch today.

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  • babymama619babymama619 member
    edited August 2013
    I think its ridiculous too, but I'll be doing it next week. I either need to bring my charges to the lab for the GD test, or to the OBs office for the rhogam shot. So they're coming with me for the shot appointment. I can reason asking for the whole day off for a 10 minute appointment. I promise I won't discuss other people's bellies though ;)

    The on that really bothers me is sick kids at the OBs office!!

  • Another one just came in. I am sitting in the waiting room between the lab and the doctors. This one has head phones, but she left her young child sitting here by himself while she gives her urine sample!

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  • I brought my step-son to one of my appointments but he lives 1,300 miles away from us and I wanted him to be able to hear his brother's heartbeat since they probably will not meet one another until Jack is 6 months or older. Just wanted him to be able to experience something in regard to the pregnancy. BUT I did ask before we went back what exactly the Dr would be doing during the visit.
  • Sorry, I'm in a bad mood and can't be as nice about this topic as the PP above me..
  • I'll have to bring this LO to future doctors appointments at times. DH is in the military and he will deploy. I'll be away from all my family too. Sometimes you just can't help it. But I do agree that I can't stand children that lack basic manners.
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  • Oops sorry, just read the end that this is your second pregnancy. Well, you should be very thankful you always have someone you can leave your four year old with...... Some of us don't have that option.
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    Married to DH since 4/2008, mommy to three beautiful boys 9/09, 10/11, 11/13
  • OP Garden does have a kid already! I always think its strange because what if there was a problem? How awful and awkward. I wouldn't bring my kid to my yearly pelvic exam or a dentist appointment, so why the OBs office?

  • CarrieB.CarrieB. member
    edited August 2013
    Wow, that's judgy. I've brought my DD to OB appointments all the time. I don't always have the convenience of an on call babysitter.

    She likes to hear the heartbeat and my OB likes to see her. So what if she runs around a little in the waiting room, it's not a formal place.
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  • My son goes to my short OB checks, but not my yearly exam. I'm trying to involve him as much as I possibly can with preparing him for this baby.

    My OB is awesome and let's him find the heartbeat. I think it's really helping him understand a little bit more about what's going on.

    My husband also goes with me to all my appointments. So in the event something was "wrong" at my appointment, he could drop our son off with a nearby relative.
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  • OP Garden does have a kid already! I always think its strange because what if there was a problem? How awful and awkward. I wouldn't bring my kid to my yearly pelvic exam or a dentist appointment, so why the OBs office?

    Actually, I've talked with my dentist and they suggest me bringing my 1 1/2 year old in for an appointment with my husband and me. They want her to see the process before she has to do it. That way she knows what to expect.

    On the other hand I wanted to smack a teenage girl a few months ago when we were in a waiting room and under her breath she said something about me having my young daughter there. I can't help that their OB shared a waiting room with the eye doctor my daughter was seeing. Some people should just insert their foot into their mouth.
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  • I bring DD (2yo) to all of my appointments. She is very well behaved and quietly sits next to me and DH till it is time for my appointment. She comes back with me for my appointment and absolutely loves to hear her brother's heart beat. She sits quietly on the seat while I talk to the MW. It has been a great way to keep her involved in the pregnancy. DH will occasionally take her to grab a snack if the appointment starts to get long or they have to do an exam. Also my MW delivered DD and loves to see how much she has grown and the new things she is doing. I see nothing wrong with taking her.
  • It's unrealistic to expect a second time mom to leave her kids elsewhere to go to a doctor's appointment. My two year old daughter has been to almost every appointment with me. My husband works, (obviously), but tries to come to all appts with me. Therefore, our daughter comes too. If he is working then she comes with just me. I don't see my child as an inconvenience. She goes where I go. If people don't like it, oh well. I'm not going to pawn my child off on someone else just bc she may "bother" people around her.

    Also, if you are a first time mom, you really don't "get it" yet... you shouldn't judge others when you haven't been in their shoes.

    Actually, I am a second time mom that was a SAHM for the first year. I still have NEVER brought my son to a doc appointment for me. Vag doc or not. My child is never an inconvenience for me, but I don't want to be bothered by yours.

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  • It's an OB/GYN office, if they talk about me and my kids I'm sure it's hardly the most interesting story of their day!
  • edited August 2013
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  • I bring ALL THREE of my kids to my appointments. Even the glucose test/ultrasound, which took over an hour! And I let them play with the toys that the waiting room provides and I let them play video games... I know, I'm the worst inconsiderate woman on the planet.
    Yep I bring both of mine to ALL of my appointments and they are going with me tomorrow to my glucose test because guess what...I live 12 hours from any family and don't have any help.  I think it's silly to hire a baby sitter and my friends have their own kids to take care of.  So my kids go EVERYWHERE with me. Kinda thought that was the point of having kids.  And yes my oldest has gone with me when I've had to have internal checks.  He sits up by my head plays on my phone and doesn't even notice where the dr. is.  He starts school two days a week next week so I will try to make my appointments on those days however I have kids deal with it.  
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  • I think the main problem was that the kids were unattended it not made to behave. Also, I never said I was judging those mothers as good or bad. I said they were being inconsiderate.
    And to the poster that said I was inconsiderate...so now the fact that I think of others when I go places and expect others to do the same makes me inconsiderate? Good to know. Next time I ll just bring my kid and let him take up one of the limited chairs, let him talk incessantly (because my kid never stops asking questions) and cry because he can't leave until I do.

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  • I think the main problem was that the kids were unattended it not made to behave. Also, I never said I was judging those mothers as good or bad. I said they were being inconsiderate. And to the poster that said I was inconsiderate...so now the fact that I think of others when I go places and expect others to do the same makes me inconsiderate? Good to know. Next time I ll just bring my kid and let him take up one of the limited chairs, let him talk incessantly (because my kid never stops asking questions) and cry because he can't leave until I do.
    But you did say that you admit you fully hate other people's children, so that is kind of being inconsiderate. So you do kind of have a bias about this situation no matter what.
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  • artistlifeartistlife member
    edited August 2013



    I think the main problem was that the kids were unattended it not made to behave. Also, I never said I was judging those mothers as good or bad. I said they were being inconsiderate.
    And to the poster that said I was inconsiderate...so now the fact that I think of others when I go places and expect others to do the same makes me inconsiderate? Good to know. Next time I ll just bring my kid and let him take up one of the limited chairs, let him talk incessantly (because my kid never stops asking questions) and cry because he can't leave until I do.

    But you did say that you admit you fully hate other people's children, so that is kind of being inconsiderate. So you do kind of have a bias about this situation no matter what.
    Not to start a fight, but how does not liking other peoples children make me inconsiderate? I wasn't aware that I was required to like everyone's children.
    ETA: grammar. 
    And, I still love you guys. It's not an excuse, but I have been rather bitchy lately. I have been able to hold my tongue real well. :-<

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  • Svenny1011Svenny1011 member
    edited August 2013
    I think the main problem was that the kids were unattended it not made to behave. Also, I never said I was judging those mothers as good or bad. I said they were being inconsiderate. And to the poster that said I was inconsiderate...so now the fact that I think of others when I go places and expect others to do the same makes me inconsiderate? Good to know. Next time I ll just bring my kid and let him take up one of the limited chairs, let him talk incessantly (because my kid never stops asking questions) and cry because he can't leave until I do.
    But you did say that you admit you fully hate other people's children, so that is kind of being inconsiderate. So you do kind of have a bias about this situation no matter what.
    Not to start a fight, buy how does not liking other peoples children make me inconsiderate? I wasn't aware that uneasy required to like everyone's children.
    It just seems like there is a little bias going into it, so it might make you more annoyed than others would be in that situation since you already don't really like other people's children. ETA: The being inconsiderate part comes with not understanding other people's situation, along with that you may be more sensitive to kid's annoying behaviors. You don't have to like other people's children, but there's nothing you can do about where they take them, how they behave, etc. It is one of those cases where you just have to take a deep breath and deal. 

    In your original post, you said nothing about how you thought they were misbehaving, just described how they were acting, and sounded a little "above them", so to speak. I was just pointing out something you said that could make people have the reactions to your post that you saw.

    Totally not trying to start an argument.
    Married since 2008 | TTC #1 since 2011

    2 losses: Nov '11 and Aug '12
    Dx: Feb '13 - HSG shows clear tubes but minor diverticulitis; Borderline DOR; Low DHEA and low testosterone.
    Moving on to IUI or IVF.

    3.4.13:  Holy crap! Surprise natural BFP on cycle #19. EDD 11.12.13
    We've got a peen.....it's a boy! 
    Little man born 11.17.2013 via c-section


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  • I think the main problem was that the kids were unattended it not made to behave. Also, I never said I was judging those mothers as good or bad. I said they were being inconsiderate. And to the poster that said I was inconsiderate...so now the fact that I think of others when I go places and expect others to do the same makes me inconsiderate? Good to know. Next time I ll just bring my kid and let him take up one of the limited chairs, let him talk incessantly (because my kid never stops asking questions) and cry because he can't leave until I do.
    But you did say that you admit you fully hate other people's children, so that is kind of being inconsiderate. So you do kind of have a bias about this situation no matter what.
    Not to start a fight, buy how does not liking other peoples children make me inconsiderate? I wasn't aware that uneasy required to like everyone's children.
    It just seems like there is a little bias going into it, so it might make you more annoyed than others would be in that situation since you already don't really like other people's children. ETA: The being inconsiderate part comes with not understanding other people's situation, along with that you may be more sensitive to kid's annoying behaviors. You don't have to like other people's children, but there's nothing you can do about where they take them, how they behave, etc. It is one of those cases where you just have to take a deep breath and deal. 

    In your original post, you said nothing about how you thought they were misbehaving, just described how they were acting, and sounded a little "above them", so to speak. I was just pointing out something you said that could make people have the reactions to your post that you saw.

    Totally not trying to start an argument.
    Thank you, Svenny. I actually didn't mean to come off as sanctimonious. I was just irritated and wanted to vent. You are also correct that I didn't take in to consideration that they may live far from friends and family or have other reasons for bringing the kids. I did say in a subsequent post that I understand certain circumstances, but that you should keep your kids quiet. I should have said that you should at least TRY to keep your child from bothering others. So, thank you for a new perspective. 


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  • Kfran84Kfran84 member
    edited August 2013
    Both of the OB offices I have used have had clearly marked signs requiring that another adult must be present to watch the kids. I see grandmas and dads in there just to sit with and watch the kids. I have never seen just a mom with kids by herself.

    My OB's office has no toys.

    Those are my thoughts. I got kind of flamed once for thinking this was the norm.

    ETA corrected word


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  • I think the main problem was that the kids were unattended it not made to behave. Also, I never said I was judging those mothers as good or bad. I said they were being inconsiderate. And to the poster that said I was inconsiderate...so now the fact that I think of others when I go places and expect others to do the same makes me inconsiderate? Good to know. Next time I ll just bring my kid and let him take up one of the limited chairs, let him talk incessantly (because my kid never stops asking questions) and cry because he can't leave until I do.
    But you did say that you admit you fully hate other people's children, so that is kind of being inconsiderate. So you do kind of have a bias about this situation no matter what.
    Not to start a fight, buy how does not liking other peoples children make me inconsiderate? I wasn't aware that uneasy required to like everyone's children.
    It just seems like there is a little bias going into it, so it might make you more annoyed than others would be in that situation since you already don't really like other people's children. ETA: The being inconsiderate part comes with not understanding other people's situation, along with that you may be more sensitive to kid's annoying behaviors. You don't have to like other people's children, but there's nothing you can do about where they take them, how they behave, etc. It is one of those cases where you just have to take a deep breath and deal. 

    In your original post, you said nothing about how you thought they were misbehaving, just described how they were acting, and sounded a little "above them", so to speak. I was just pointing out something you said that could make people have the reactions to your post that you saw.

    Totally not trying to start an argument.
    Thank you, Svenny. I actually didn't mean to come off as sanctimonious. I was just irritated and wanted to vent. You are also correct that I didn't take in to consideration that they may live far from friends and family or have other reasons for bringing the kids. I did say in a subsequent post that I understand certain circumstances, but that you should keep your kids quiet. I should have said that you should at least TRY to keep your child from bothering others. So, thank you for a new perspective. 

    No worries. This is coming from someone who couldn't stand kids for so long that my mother was convinced I'd never have them. For reals. She even told me when we were trying (she didn't know that at the time) that I have no motherly instinct. She's a cold biyatch sometimes. And probably the most judgmental person in the world, so I'm a little sensitive to it all. Ha!
    Married since 2008 | TTC #1 since 2011

    2 losses: Nov '11 and Aug '12
    Dx: Feb '13 - HSG shows clear tubes but minor diverticulitis; Borderline DOR; Low DHEA and low testosterone.
    Moving on to IUI or IVF.

    3.4.13:  Holy crap! Surprise natural BFP on cycle #19. EDD 11.12.13
    We've got a peen.....it's a boy! 
    Little man born 11.17.2013 via c-section


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  • I can understand being annoyed if kids are misbehaving and the parents aren't trying to correct there behavior. With that being said, I doubt there are any mamas out there who haven't had a child, at some point, throw a tantrum in a store or a restraunt or an airplane. It's embarrassing and sometimes, especially if they are very young, there is nothing you can do to reason with them. And leaving isn't always an option (ie in the middle of a dr app). I guess I'm just saying you never know what someone else's circumstances are.
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    Married to DH since 4/2008, mommy to three beautiful boys 9/09, 10/11, 11/13
  • I had a lady bring her 3 kids all looked to be under age 6 by herself to her appointment, what's worse is our waiting room is really small so she let her children spread out and take up all the seats, they were running around, tripped over my feet, leaning over people to reach magazines and dropping food on the floor. Even better when the youngest one dropped food on the floor the mom sent her down the hall by herself and told her to find a nurse to throw it away for her. I was horrified.
  • I think I must be the most accepting and understanding person here. I love kids. Period. Like even the nasty screaming kids in stores and on planes, I just want to hug them and make them forget why they were crying(creepy, right?). And hearing the loud toddlers asking life's questions over and over at my OB makes the wait worth it (the Marines made me time OCD and I always end up showing up 30-45 min early). It seriously makes me smile ear to ear the whole time. My OB also has a pediatrician, so there are always kids there.
  • My OB does not allow any children over the age of 6 months unless they are 13 years old...I'm a STM and with that being said, I had to reschedule my appointment today because I didn't have anyone to watch my son, I kind of wish my OB didn't have that rule.
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