I am so disgusted in my friend rant.

Gwyneddlesliegrace · August 2013

A number of years ago we suspected that a family friend's daughter was being molested by her brother. My MIL and teenage SIL were the ones who had witnessed the situations and the hints of abuse. For a while my MIL refused to call cps. She didn't want to upset the friend or have her friend get in trouble. Then my SIL and H had a conversation with MIL about the child. They asked if they loved her, and if they loved her why would they let this continue. They pointed out that by knowing and not doing anything holds them just as morally responsible.

My point is, it doesn't matter if you think cps will do nothing. I think what matters is that YOU do the right thing by the child. While cps might not do something right away, it will be noted that a call was placed. And if other things are going on, this can be one more thing that will help the child get to a safe place.

sleepy33 · August 2013

I am reading all of this wondering why you, Panda, did not simply respond to the text, "Hey, you know what, it's not cool for you to smoke weed right now, I've watched your kid all day, please come and pick her up ASAP."

Not trying to pile on, but it does seem you made yourself a bit of a doormat here, and from your comments it sounds like maybe that kind of thing happens to you a lot.

CMireles2 · August 2013

Gwyneddlesliegrace said:

CMireles2 said:

Smoking weed then picking up her kid? Sounds totally safe... NOT. And this is coming from a huge pot head bAck in my college days. RETARDED.

While I agree with you. I find your last word to be very offensive. Their are a ton of parents on these boards wit children with special needs. Those parents are going to be hearing this world their whole lives and dealing with it and bullying. Please consider this next time you go to use it.

I apologize I offended you. Didn't realize it was such a sensitive word in this context! I will keep that in mind in this chat forum.

lovelittlebean · August 2013

Just to be clear, I did say I think it is irresponsible and the mother seems like a loser. I do not ever drink or use drugs to begin with, so it won't be an issue for me with my own kids. I am simply pointing out that many people do use alcohol and rx drugs around their kids, and it is generally acceptable. How many moms will be sent home with narcotic painkillers after their deliveries, and it is viewed as acceptable because a doctor approved it? I think it is a double standard. Do I think smoking weed around a kid is a good choice? No! And neither is drinking or taking painkillers. Do I think it warrants a call to cps? No. Would you call cps on someone who has a couple glasses of wine? I think not.

oneblessedmess · August 2013

@pandaglitter You're being way too defensive. I don't think anyone is trying to "guilt" you or trying to say you are an awful person. People are concerned for an 18-month-old whose mother thinks it's okay to smoke pot instead of picking up her child. I work with at-risk youth, and one of my kids grew up in a family of drug addicts. She was smoking pot by age 12, eventually turning to harder drugs since her family was too high to notice, and has gotten clean and "relapsed" several times. She is only 18 years old. It is a serious issue.

I guess I just don't really understand why you are so opposed to calling CPS right away? Even if you are going to later, when people suggested it you were making excuses like "Oh CPS is already watching her, my call won't do anything." It's not like calling them will hurt.

beccabrad · August 2013

CMireles2 said:

CMireles2 said:

Smoking weed then picking up her kid? Sounds totally safe... NOT. And this is coming from a huge pot head bAck in my college days. RETARDED.

While I agree with you. I find your last word to be very offensive. Their are a ton of parents on these boards wit children with special needs. Those parents are going to be hearing this world their whole lives and dealing with it and bullying. Please consider this next time you go to use it.
I apologize I offended you. Didn't realize it was such a sensitive word in this context! I will keep that in mind in this chat forum.

It's not just offensive in this chat forum. It's offensive period and not an appropriate word to use at all in any context IMO.

Wino0920 · August 2013

@lovelittlebean Those women also probably have help with their children or take them at appropriate times. You are comparing apples to oranges. There is being responsible and being irresponsible with this kind of stuff and clearly this mom is being irresponsible.

CMireles2 · August 2013

Ok, we'll once again I apologized, I'm sorry I offended you ladies.

lovelittlebean · August 2013

btimes3 said:

lovelittlebean said:

Just to be clear, I did say I think it is irresponsible and the mother seems like a loser. I do not ever drink or use drugs to begin with, so it won't be an issue for me with my own kids. I am simply pointing out that many people do use alcohol and rx drugs around their kids, and it is generally acceptable. How many moms will be sent home with narcotic painkillers after their deliveries, and it is viewed as acceptable because a doctor approved it? I think it is a double standard. Do I think smoking weed around a kid is a good choice? No! And neither is drinking or taking painkillers. Do I think it warrants a call to cps? No. Would you call cps on someone who has a couple glasses of wine? I think not.

Wait, are you comparing a woman taking necessary painkillers after delivering a child--on doctor's orders and under doctor's supervision, and following the instructions and guidelines given to her at the time the medication is dispensed--with drinking or smoking pot? Is that what's happening here? Because that's amazing.

Yes, I am comparing these things. Just because a doctor prescribed it does not mean it doesn't cause inebriation. And painkillers are certainly not necessary. Not to mention way more harmful than pot, which by the way, can also be obtained via prescription in many states.

lovelittlebean · August 2013

Wino0920 said:
@lovelittlebean Those women also probably have help with their children or take them at appropriate times. You are comparing apples to oranges. There is being responsible and being irresponsible with this kind of stuff and clearly this mom is being irresponsible.

Yeah, I agree it is irresponsible. I said that four times now. I just disagree with calling cps.

Amjoy25 · August 2013

petdocd said:

pandaglitter said:

Yea more stress and guilt is exactly what I need right now. Thanks guys. Have awesome pregnancies. I hope all of you don't have to deal with everything I do. I doubt even calling CPS would be enough to make you all happy, because obviously its my fucking fault she chose to make bad choices and I should have been able to stop her. I never said I wasn't going to, just that for tonight there's nothing I can do and I certainly won't be continuing a friendship with her. Thanks for making me feel like a horrible person when I'm trying so fucking hard to be nice to everyone and help everyone and go above and beyond to be a good friend and wife and mom, when everyone just takes advantage of me. Story of my fucking life, so I'm sorry I'm not more shocked. Sorry that I didn't hop on my phone to call CPS immediately because I'm not a perfect fucking person and I obviously don't give a shit about the child, you're right. I am disgusting. Next time, I'll just hold her hostage until CPS comes and drug tests the mom and removes the child from her home.

C'mon panda you have been around long enough to know to not take these things personally. Do you think that you are the first pregnant person to be on bed rest, or to go through rough times? No, no you are not. There is no need to play the victim in this situation, and go off the deep end.

I have nothing to add to this post...other than this gif is awesome! Thanks @petdocd for making me giggle while sitting in the airport terminal. Snore.

Amjoy25 · August 2013

Wait? Did @pandaglitter GBCB???

HFrizzle · August 2013

My sisters and I grew up in a house hold with parents smoking pot and I wish someone would have called CPS on them. There were many a times that we were neglected in one way or another, whether it was not having food in the house, having weird people in & out because they were selling it, having filthy living conditions, no money to pay bills let alone the necessities needed to raise 3 kids. All their "non smoking" family and friends turned a blind eye to it all. I had the common sense not to use drugs, ever, in my life. My sisters though, were very impressionable and started out with pot at 12 or 13 with my parents. One then turned to alcohol & cocaine by the age of 15. She had unprotected sex, got pregnant (while drunk & high) and had an abortion. My other sister got hooked on pot, started stealing to support her "habit", got in trouble at school and with the law and got hooked up with a Meth dealer. I blame this all on my parents and their inability to be able to parent their children the proper way because they were too stoned to give a shit.

People seem to have this hippy dippy mentality that pot is ok and isn't any worse than this or that. I'm sorry, but I have seen my parents baked out of their minds not being able to drive safely, let alone supervise children. Yay, there are some different varieties of pot that don't seem to have high contents of TSH, but a person that is using drugs to use drugs isn't going to get the mild stuff. They are going to pay good money and get the good shit that does the job.

And to @lovelittlebean, your arguments are ridiculous. One glass of wine does not compare to smoking pot and having to take care of your child and your duties as a parent. She was obviously impaired enough to need someone to drive her, which means she shouldn't have been taking care of her child. Plain and simple!

bnikiz · August 2013

@Lovelittlebean

You obviously have never had your abdomen sliced open, organs removed, moved around, put back and stitched up again. They are every bit necessary at that point. Besides they are not ILLEGAL!
:Insert head banging on wall gif: damn mobile

lovelittlebean · August 2013

bnikiz said:

Yes, I am comparing these things. Just because a doctor prescribed it does not mean it doesn't cause inebriation. And painkillers are certainly not necessary. Not to mention way more harmful than pot, which by the way, can also be obtained via prescription in many states.

You obviously have never had your abdomen sliced open, organs removed, moved around, put back and stitched up again. They are every bit necessary at that point. Besides they are not ILLEGAL!
:Insert head banging on wall gif: damn mobile
Actually, I have had abdominal surgery and had no narcotic pain killers because I am allergic. I had some big ass Motrin instead. marijuana is not illegal nationwide, but that is an entirely different debate. I stand by what I said before: panda's friend is irresponsible, but I don't think CPS needs to get involved over a bit of weed.

bnikiz · August 2013

It may not be illegal in every state but it is still illegal on a federal level. You can still get charged federaly if you are in a state where it is legal

BeachMama7693 · August 2013

I have come to this conclusion.... @lovelittlebean is CLEARLY a pothead. Also, she says I should call cps on ALL of you who take your pain killers after you get a csection so WATCH OUT. Anyone who is THAT defensive about pot smoking MUST be high.

HFrizzle · August 2013

BeachMama7693 said:
I have come to this conclusion....
@lovelittlebean is CLEARLY a pothead. Also, she says I should call cps on ALL of you who take your pain killers after you get a csection so WATCH OUT. Anyone who is THAT defensive about pot smoking MUST be high.

You better call cps on me, cause I took a cold medication last week that made me go to sleep and I've had Benadryl this week to help with allergy symptoms. ~shaking fist in the air~

BeachMama7693 · August 2013

@hfrizzle if you would have just smoked some pot instead I wouldn't have to do anything but cold medicine.... SO UNACCEPTABLE. Tisk tisk.

palm513 · August 2013

bnikiz said:

@Lovelittlebean You obviously have never had your abdomen sliced open, organs removed, moved around, put back and stitched up again. They are every bit necessary at that point. Besides they are not ILLEGAL! :Insert head banging on wall gif: damn mobile

Not justifying anything I had a C-section and was only taking 2 Tylenol a day by two days postpartum. Not because I wasn't in pain but because I was determined to breast feed and I didn't want the drugs to go to the babies. And at that level the pain was tolerable.

I think calling CPS (DCF where I'm from) wouldn't hurt. But, if they do anything it will probably just be counseling, and drug testing. But that doesn't mean it isn't the right thing to do. Just to notify them of the drugs, and who knows maybe the counseling really could help and she can become a good parent.

As for last night there really wasn't much she could have done. I mean CPS wouldn't come out that late and calling the cops would have mad a huge seen which would not be good for either one of the children. Also, if they decided tot arrest her for some reason the child would go into the system which is in a lot of places worse than where she was going.

In the original post she texted saying she was looking for a ride, not some added later bs. So she wasn't driving, it was also stated that they both seemed sober when they finally after hours got to the house. It wasn't a stop by her dealer, take a couple hits, jump in the car pick up the kid, and take her home to be solely supervised my the mother, all within an hour. It is more like get off work get high, hang out, find a ride, pick up kid, take kid home and probably put them to bed.

I also think she completely took advantage of a friend which is wrong of her and, I think panda should have called today. Because it is illegal to use and it does impair you, and no one should be taking care of a child impaired. No matter the reason, I don't think smoking a joint is really comparable to a glass of wine, but maybe 3 - 4 beers. Which if she were to take the child home and put them to bed and then get plastered no one would have cared. At least she didn't smoke in her house with the child there.

I do not think she is a good mother but I do think she could have made a lot worse decisions. And, with as much as I despise them I think CPS should be involved.

HFrizzle · August 2013

MomtobeOct13 said:
Not that I condone her actions, this thread made me think of this article https://mobile.alternet.org/alternet/#!/entry/twoyearold-taken-from-parents-because-they-smoked-pot-is-murdered,520264a9da27f5d9d006f385/1

What was the point of posting this? There are bad people in our military, our police dept, our school systems, that doesn't mean we shouldn't be reporting something.

[Deleted User] · August 2013

CMireles2 said:

CMireles2 said:

Smoking weed then picking up her kid? Sounds totally safe... NOT. And this is coming from a huge pot head bAck in my college days. RETARDED.

While I agree with you. I find your last word to be very offensive. Their are a ton of parents on these boards wit children with special needs. Those parents are going to be hearing this world their whole lives and dealing with it and bullying. Please consider this next time you go to use it.
I apologize I offended you. Didn't realize it was such a sensitive word in this context! I will keep that in mind in this chat forum.

Are you fucking dense? The use of that word in that context is offensive in LIFE, not just on internet forums.

LSP87 · August 2013

I get that you don't want to start shit, but it's actually your legal duty to report something like that to CPS. Period. I seriously doubt they would remove the child, but she needs a wake up call and some family based services and classes. If she's not hesitant to tell you she's smoking weed, I'd be concerned about what else she does & who she has around her very vulnerable child. People are sick and its NOT uncommon for "friends" to wind up assaulting 18 month old children or YOUNGER.

I saw it myself all the time, sadly.

It's up to you what you do from here.

LSP87 · August 2013

lovelittlebean said:
I'm sorry, but would you call cps on someone for having a beer? Smoking a hit of weed is pretty much the same thing. I still think the friend is a loser, though. Totally irresponsible.

The difference between weed and beer is that weed is illegal in the majority of the country. It doesn't matter that it might not impair her enough to be a "danger", but it CAN get your kids taken away from you if you decide you'd rather break the law and get a "little" high rather than be a parent.

I'm not anti-weed. I say this because that's basically the law's argument.

lovelittlebean · August 2013

BeachMama7693 said:
I have come to this conclusion....
@lovelittlebean is CLEARLY a pothead. Also, she says I should call cps on ALL of you who take your pain killers after you get a csection so WATCH OUT. Anyone who is THAT defensive about pot smoking MUST be high.

And I have come to the conclusion that you clearly lack reading comprehension skills because I never even implied that CPS should be called for pain pills after a csec. I am only pointing out the double standard. And it is also ironic that I must be a pot head and am so defensive even though I have not resorted to insults or name calling this entire time. Pain pills ARE more dangerous than pot on many levels. It is not being defensive, it is just a fact. Do I think being high around your kids is irresponsible? I will say it one more time with meaning... Yes!

Wino0920 · August 2013

Actually lovelittlebean you called us lunatics first.

lovelittlebean · August 2013

Yeah. I forgot about that! :-B it must be all the weed I smoke...

HFrizzle · August 2013

Oy Vey @littlelovebean

Brookej610 · August 2013

Anyone got a gif of a dog chasing its tail? Clearly, we're getting nowhere..... Nothing else to do but gif!!

[Deleted User] · August 2013

@brookej610

bkeane619 · August 2013

First off let me state what pandas friend did is wrong. It is irresponsible as an adult to be under the influence of ANYTHING imparing IMO around a young child. Legal or illegal. As I have stated in the past I am an ex smoker and have no problem admitting it. I have to say pot is def not as bad as many prescription drugs. I was more screwed by codeine cough medicine than pot. Everyone has different tolerances and I wonder what u guys would think if a parent had a LEGAL prescription for pot? I would never smoke around my kids OR drink which I see PLENTY of people do all the time. So because pot is illegal CPS should be called but a drunk parent can do it every BBQ or party they go to? I think it's a double standard. That being said. Pandas friend sounds like an irresponsible dirtbag who probably shouldn't have a kid anyway.

CMireles2 · August 2013

@bkeane619 I COMPLETELY agree with your statement.

sleepy33 · August 2013

LSP87 said:

I get that you don't want to start shit, but it's actually your legal duty to report something like that to CPS. Period. I seriously doubt they would remove the child, but she needs a wake up call and some family based services and classes. If she's not hesitant to tell you she's smoking weed, I'd be concerned about what else she does & who she has around her very vulnerable child. People are sick and its NOT uncommon for "friends" to wind up assaulting 18 month old children or YOUNGER. I saw it myself all the time, sadly. It's up to you what you do from here.

Ok, well, that's not true. Unless you are a mandated reporter.

Jenball717 · August 2013

@lovelittlebean
You have no idea the pain tolerance or threshold for anyone other than yourself. So, please don't tell others what can or cannot be done in their situation as far as pain meds go. Leave that to the doctors.
And, if a med is going to cause drowsiness or inability to function, it comes with a warning label and list of side effects. Does a sandwich bag of weed include that?

BeachMama7693 · August 2013

@lovelittlebean You have no idea the pain tolerance or threshold for anyone other than yourself. So, please don't tell others what can or cannot be done in their situation as far as pain meds go. Leave that to the doctors. And, if a med is going to cause drowsiness or inability to function, it comes with a warning label and list of side effects. Does a sandwich bag of weed include that?

LMAO. Ten thumbs up for this.

Ziegeficker · August 2013

Jenball717 said:

@lovelittlebean And, if a med is going to cause drowsiness or inability to function, it comes with a warning label and list of side effects. Does a sandwich bag of weed include that?

How does this support your argument exactly? A warning label exempts you from all wrongdoing as a result of the side effects of a drug?

linzluvsgzuss · August 2013

Our2miracles said:

@lovelittlebean I'm a mandated reporter and my sister works for Cps here in Ny it's called AcS. No mom has ever lost her child for weed smoking. They step in place her in a drug program and monitor the home situation. The fact that she choose to go smoke instead of picking up her kid from her friend who is supposed to be resting is a red flag. Who knows what other poor choices she has made. She needs supervision with that kid. The only way her daughter would get snatched is if she refused to comply with drug program and keep failing her random drug test. It's funny that you think that the ppl here are hysterical and lunatics no we are concerned moms.

This.

LSP87 · August 2013

sleepy33 said:

LSP87 said:

I get that you don't want to start shit, but it's actually your legal duty to report something like that to CPS. Period. I seriously doubt they would remove the child, but she needs a wake up call and some family based services and classes. If she's not hesitant to tell you she's smoking weed, I'd be concerned about what else she does & who she has around her very vulnerable child. People are sick and its NOT uncommon for "friends" to wind up assaulting 18 month old children or YOUNGER.

I saw it myself all the time, sadly.

It's up to you what you do from here.

Ok, well, that's not true. Unless you are a mandated reporter.

I should have said that at least where I'm located...which is Texas..if you even SUSPECT abuse is occurring, you ARE mandated to report.

Jenball717 · August 2013

Ziegeficker said:

Jenball717 said:

@lovelittlebean
And, if a med is going to cause drowsiness or inability to function, it comes with a warning label and list of side effects. Does a sandwich bag of weed include that?

How does this support your argument exactly? A warning label exempts you from all wrongdoing as a result of the side effects of a drug?

No, not at all. I'm saying they are known and acknowledged risks and you would be held liable in the event you ignore those risks. There is a standard. With weed there is no standard and the risks vary and it is therefore not a wise choice to use when caring for a child or driving or other activities.

Want a personalized experience?

I am so disgusted in my friend rant.

Re: I am so disgusted in my friend rant.

Choose Another Board

Search Boards