Ready for # 2?

kara0910 · August 2013

So, I've not been on here in a realllly long time. Like, since I was pregnant with my first baby and now she'll be two in Oct. So, anyway, DH and I have been pretty heavily talking about number 2.. and by heavily I mean, we've thrown all caution to the wind. I'm pretty set on getting pregnant as soon as it can happen. My concerns are, is it too soon? I mean I know there are plenty that want their kids really close, I feel like my DD has no one to play with and the thought of having a new baby just makes me melt and I'm really experiencing the same feelings I had when trying to get pregnant with my daughter. I'm worried about the age gap and how hard this is going to be with transitioning from one to two. I know I worry for nothing but to have a little encouragement and input would be nice! I'm such a worry wart I can find a reason to worry over anything and obsess over everything

takmjs · August 2013

My DD is 19 months now. We're planning on "trying" starting in October. I'm also scared to go from 1 to 2. I think the age gap of 2 1/2 years is good, not that I have experience since I only have one so far as well....but I think you make any age difference work. The only concern I have with that is that I'll probably want to do potty-training around 2 1/2 to 3 years old, so that could be a hard time also having a new baby at home. Sometimes I feel like having one child is really nice, but I want her to have a brother or sister (and hopefully more than one). Good luck to you. I'd take some encouragement as well, especially on going from one to two kids.

jenb_99 · August 2013

DS will be two in November and we started TTC this month. I've always thought 2-3 years is a great gap.

allardr · August 2013

We're going to TTC this fall so that when #2 is born they'll be 2 years apart. I grew up 2 years apart from my siblings and DH was 3 years from his sister I love that 2-3yr gap. I dont' stress about the potty training because most kids even if potty trained before #2 regress during that period. This time around I think it'll be harder being pregnant, no daytime naps and lazy days for me

But overall I think don't stress 1 - 2 kids transition will go fine!

foreverapartofme · August 2013

I think it is normal to feel a little nervous with the transition but if you are ready go for it. My DH and I are TTC #2 starting this month. Our DD is 18 months old and is so sweet with her younger cousin who is 9 months old. If you have any family or friends with a younger baby, I would offer to babysit with your LO. Watching my niece and taking the two babies out on errands has increased confidence in myself to be able to handle #2. Good luck!

oliversmommy32912 · August 2013

If I could be pregnant right now I would be. DS is 16 months. I really wanted a 2 to 3 year gap. The first year would be difficult I'm sure but after that it doesn't seem too bad. We will likely have a four year age gap and that terrifies me much more.

yepyepsms · August 2013

DS is 14 months and we are not "trying" but we're not on BC. We have talked a lot about it and think we're ready, even though we don't really know what "ready" means:) We have a stable home, fine financial situation, good jobs, etc. etc. but we also know that two will be a tough transition and have it's up and downs. So we aren't 'trying" (charting, temping, tracking, etc.) and just living life, having sex whenever the mood strikes and for now seeing what happens. If we aren't preggo in 6 months or so, we'll try more intentionally. We decided to be ok with getting pregnant anytime for the following reasons: like the idea of my children being 2-3 years apart, our age (I will be 31 soon and he will be 35), and if we do have trouble getting pregnant don't want to wait for the perfect time and just try now...plus we want three so we don't have tons of time of good fertility years to have two more. Some days I think "OMG, I cannot handle anything more in my life!" but more often than not lately I am thinking about another baby. LOL, on the rough tantrums days with DS my hubby and I joke around and think "wtf, are we sure we want anymore?!!"

Mommy2Boys09 · August 2013

My boys are 2 1/2 years apart and I love it! DS 1 was old enough to understand and "help out" with DS 2. The hardest part was when DS 2 was getting up multiple times during the night and then getting up with DS 1 every morning but that only lasts so long. We're currently TTC #3 and DS 2 will (hopefully) be about the same age as DS 1 was when DS 2 was born. I really like the age difference but everyone is different! Good luck! If you (& your DH of course) decide to start trying come join the Trying To Get Pregnant board!

Eleventy11 · August 2013

I've already had #2! My LOs are 14 months apart. We are only 2.5 months in, but the transition has been super simple. I think having an older child would only make it easier. It is so different the second time around.

vrj0522 · August 2013

Having a newborn will probably be difficult as it always is, whether you have another child or not. But like you said, you want a playmate for your LO and I think that if you are feeling the excitement of the prospect of getting pregnant, then you are ready. If you think about it, how old would your DD have to be before you felt completely ready and would that age-gap be something that you would be happy with? If not, then now is the time to start trying again.

We have been ttc again since DS was 6 months and unfortunately it hasn't worked out for us. I look back and I do wonder how I would have done it if I had ended up pg earlier but at the same time, the difficulty of it lasts but a little while and then you have your kids close together and going through similar things at the same time. My mom had 4 in 6 years and we are the best of friends and I love the small gap between all of us because it makes it so we can all relate to each other, even the oldest and the youngest.

cdbayes · August 2013

DS #2 is arriving in October. My boys will be 19 months apart. I've been told by many that we will love having them so close. I know it will be much harder with 2, but will eventually fall into a routine

Caseyk1127 · August 2013

My two are 14 months apart (I'm crazy). It's not easy but they melt my heart every single day and once you get into a groove it gets easier. They are best friends and now that DD is very mobile they spend hours in the playroom together and I have to drag them out to eat.

Lemmon_ade12 · August 2013

I got pregnant with DS #2 right before DS#1 turned a year. The plan was to start trying after his birthday, but once we started talking about it, we didn't see the point in waiting. So, here I sit 38 weeks along, waiting to bring #2 home. DH and his brother are 18 mos apart, and he really enjoyed that growing up, so even though I'm a little anxious to have 2u2 (for a little bit), I know it will be worth it in the end. Me and my brother were just over 3 years apart, and I didn't mind that age gap either, though I think more than that you're going to be pushing it to the "too far apart" category in my opinion.

I have no doubt that every mom goes through anxiety about shifting from one kiddo to two, but if it's right for your family, it will go great :-) GL!

michelle7482 · August 2013

I have a 17 mo old and am due next month with DD2. For us, we wanted them close together. DD1 will never remember being an only child, plus I'm a sahm mom for now so the timing made sense for us. Good luck with your decision.

PetuniaFeatherbottom · August 2013

Daughter will be 2 +1 month when our second daughter is due. Dr suggested at least 12-18 months between kids so your body can heal properly. I'm 4 years apart from my brothers and we were never close. I like the idea of having them fairly close together, especially since I'm not getting any younger myself.

mommymegan831 · August 2013

mine are 25 months apart and for the most part I love it, they have so much fun together now, although I have to watch them because DD often plays too rough and they're also at the age where they fight over toys too. Since DS has been walking well life has been much more difficult. I can't really trust DD to just stay with me all the time, and DS doesn't always want to be held or contained to the stroller. As much as I love their age difference, I think if I had waited a bit life would be much easier. Since DD turned 3 she's been much easier, plus the 1st year of the baby's life is pretty easy, so by the time the baby is moving around and the older one is closer to 4 I'm thinking things would go very smoothly.

mommymegan831 · August 2013

oliversmommy32912 said:

The first year would be difficult I'm sure but after that it doesn't seem too bad.

Just read over the other responses and this really made me laugh. I was so amazed and how easy a new born/ little baby can be, even though DS was probably a little colicky. The 1st time everything seems like so much work and I don't think you realize or enjoy how much they really do sleep or how much you can get done while holding them. Last year with a baby and a 2 year old I had such a great summer and we did so much together, this year, with a 1 and 3 year old, life is a little overwhelming.

As far as potty training, a few weeks after having DS, DD, at 27 months refused to wear diapers and potty training was a breeze, again, because DS slept so much, or I could put him in a pack and play without worrying about him going anywhere, it was a very easy process.

kara0910 · August 2013

Thank you all so much. It is very encouraging to hear responses. I will say from experience with my DD there is no "ready" or "perfect" time. Its all about how you adjust accordingly its different for everyone. My DH and I are still pretty young and thats how we wanted it to be because we really wanted to have our kids young, we also know we are ready for number 2. Its something we both agree will be a challenge but we know our DD will be so pleased to finally have a playmate and I do want them close enough to enjoy each other as friends as well as siblings! You can never be ready enough or not enough in my opinion when talking to friends they ask when is a good time and im like... Well there is no right time. Its whether or not you are ready to change your life completely and no matter how much help or advise you are given... Its all according to you and your significant other. But i think when its all im thinking about everyday, what it would be like to have another and that warm mushy feeling of seeing a new baby in my arms, its enough to tell me we are ready as we can be lol.

Want a personalized experience?

Ready for # 2?

Re: Ready for # 2?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards