TP to the "you just want until..." people

dobrydney · August 2013

I know people mean well, so I'll preface it by saying that. I just get irritated with the "you just wait until...". We decided to have this baby, and I knew what I was getting into (for the most part). It makes me want to correct everything in their life with an equally annoying statement.

krm112013 · August 2013

Yeah, they mean well. But they're also very annoying while spreading all that wellness.

runblondie26 · August 2013

All the childless and FTMs who are so adamant and judgemental in their child rearing convictions..... I would NEVER give my kid this or let them do that, etc. I always think "oh, just you wait". l'd never, ever say it though :P It's annoying coming from either side, lol.

Maimes10 · August 2013

I am so with you on this one. I am so over the "you just wait" comment after everything I say. It's most annoying when someone asks how you are feeling and you say "great!"...."oh, you just wait"...really?

krm112013 · August 2013

runblondie26 said:

All the childless and FTMs who are so adamant and judgemental in their child rearing convictions..... I would NEVER give my kid this or let them do that, etc. I always think "oh, just you wait". l'd never, ever say it though :P It's annoying coming from either side, lol.

I'm a FTM, but I definitely don't doll out parenting advice and I am of the mind set, "take it as it comes." Because about the time I ever say or think, "oh I'll never do that." I most definitely will! LOL!

amandasvids · August 2013

I so agree! I am over that statement. It takes everything I have in me to smile, nod, and be polite when in reality I want to get all snarky and tell them to keep it to themselves.

molly0169 · August 2013

DH's aunts house is ALWAYS a mess and her kids fight ALL the time (9 and 5) and she always pulls the "just wait until you have kids, this will be your life". Um pretty sure not. But thanks anyways.

babymama619 · August 2013

I get especially annoyed with these people, especially the moms I've nannied for. They'll try to tell me it will be different.., Um, no. I've spend 15 years learning how to raise kids. Reflecting and trying new things and throwing out techniques that didnt work. My principals are not going to change just because I share genes with someone.

For example: I personally am against cosleeping. My boss knows this and leaves the five month old in her bed in the morning. He's rolled off TWICE!!!! She thinks I'll change my opinion when I have my own, um no.

Another on is I'm against food in the car. Choking is silent so I never allow small kids to have food unless I'm with them. Another mom tried to tell me that will change with nagging. Seriously? Nagging? Grow a pair lady!

runblondie26 · August 2013

molly0169 said:

DH's aunts house is ALWAYS a mess and her kids fight ALL the time (9 and 5) and she always pulls the "just wait until you have kids, this will be your life". Um pretty sure not. But thanks anyways.

LOL

Barbercharm · August 2013

Haha!! All I can say, pregnant with my 4th, is just you wait..

. After a kid or two, when you hear someone say something about how great pregnancy is or how their child would never ever behave that way, the first words to pop in your head will be "just you wait"... Whether you say them out loud or not!!
It's inevitable once you've had more life experience than the person you are talking to.

dobrydney · August 2013

Another thing along the same lines that really gets me is when I say I'm going with the flow as my birth plan I get laughed at or get the dreaded "you just wait...". Can you please remove yourself from my vagina and let me do my thing? I'm sure you were perfect at it your first time around :-)

dobrydney · August 2013

Barbercharm said:

Haha!! All I can say, pregnant with my 4th, is just you wait.. . After a kid or two, when you hear someone say something about how great pregnancy is or how their child would never ever behave that way, the first words to pop in your head will be "just you wait"... Whether you say them out loud or not!! It's inevitable once you've had more life experience than the person you are talking to.

I'm a FTM, but I agree with you. We just hosted an exchange student for a year and a lot of times I wanted to say it to her...but I didn't because I knew how annoying it was haha!

rbtrumpet · August 2013

I've given up on TPs, I just dont' have that many in me!

I just smile and nod. Every child is different - who are you to tell me mine won't sleep, or eat, or breastfeed, or will be colicky, or will want me to hold her all the time, or won't want me to hold her at all. Is it going to be perfect? no. Is it going to be exactly like your situation? NOPE!

Guess what, I'm pretty good at adapting. I will find what works best for me and my baby just like the billions of monthers who have done this before me!

dobrydney · August 2013

dollphnfreek10 said:

dobrydney said:

Another thing along the same lines that really gets me is when I say I'm going with the flow as my birth plan I get laughed at or get the dreaded "you just wait...". Can you please remove yourself from my vagina and let me do my thing? I'm sure you were perfect at it your first time around :-)

DYING! LOL!

:-)

rbtrumpet · August 2013

Finnaroo said:

Yeah it's wearing thin on me too. I'm really tempted to start saying, "OMG! I had no idea! I should definitely put the baby up for adoption because I didn't know that would happen! Thanks for letting me know before it was too late! Phew! Dodged a bullet there!"

I have a friend who's really, really bad about this. While pregnant, she would go on and on about how she would only breastfeed and how horrible formula was. This was, of course, in front of a friend who couldn't breastfeed and was formula feeding. Once friend A had her baby, guess who was stocking up on formula. You'd think that she would have learned, but no.

sheesh....

I think it's definitely the worst coming from people who should know better. I'm surprised as HOW MANY of the people giving me the "just you wait" advice about how my life is over are the few people I chose to share with, in real life, our struggles when we hit a year of trying without getting pregnant!

(I hope that sentence makes sense....it's Friday and my brain has turned off)

dobrydney · August 2013

Sing2phins said:

dobrydney said:

Another thing along the same lines that really gets me is when I say I'm going with the flow as my birth plan I get laughed at or get the dreaded "you just wait...". Can you please remove yourself from my vagina and let me do my thing? I'm sure you were perfect at it your first time around :-)

I really hate when people here say, "Don't bother with a birth plan because you don't have any control." Maybe we don't have the same understanding of what a "birth plan" is, but there's no effing way I'm going into this without knowing what interventions might be offered and which ones I'm willing to accept (barring major medical crises) and how I'd like things to go generally, and there's no way I'm not sharing that information with the people whose job it is to help me get LO here safely. I totally understand that you cannot control everything, and I'm certainly not going to be rigid in the face of common sense, but there's no reason to just hand your autonomy over to doctors and nurses without thinking about it.

I can't tell if you're annoyed at what I said or not (internet doesn't help that!), but to clarify I basically mean that no matter what you want to do--it's your choice. If you want to have it planned out to the last detail go for it, or none at all go for it. My point was that it's no one's job but mine to determine that.

michrocc · August 2013

I completely agree, and also find myself getting annoyed at the "just you wait" response when you share something positive.

Me: "DH and I felt the baby kick for the first time last night! We were so excited!"

Them: "That's nothing. Just wait until you start seeing the whole baby move from across the room."

You know what? We're first-time parents. Let us have our moments and try not to be such a massive buzzkill. I'm pretty sure you were excited the first time you felt your baby kick, too.

katie.725 · August 2013

Yes... lord yes to everything above

We all agree!!! TP's for everyone who pulls that sh*t

dobrydney · August 2013

michrocc said:

I completely agree, and also find myself getting annoyed at the "just you wait" response when you share something positive.

Me: "DH and I felt the baby kick for the first time last night! We were so excited!"

Them: "That's nothing. Just wait until you start seeing the whole baby move from across the room."

You know what? We're first-time parents. Let us have our moments and try not to be such a massive buzzkill. I'm pretty sure you were excited the first time you felt your baby kick, too.

Really good point! I'm sure they were experts the moment the sperm and egg met.

gdom872 · August 2013

Just you wait comments are so annoying. Almost as bad as the "look how big you're getting" comments. People need to learn manners. If I wanted your opinion I would ask. TP!

Hollywogg · August 2013

I get annoyed too. I try to politely excuse myself from those conversations. Some of them mean well, but some of them just want to hear themselves talk/and/or feel superior. Those are the ones I definitely do not have patience with.

swimiz500 · August 2013

Oh, I hate the "just wait"s! Even as a STM, I get it all the time. Actually, I think I get it more this time around. And it is always so negative, and then I am completely worried and upset that I got myself into something I can't handle. I wish people would just stop. I mean, maybe they are thinking they are "preparing" me or something, but really they are just keeping me up at night!

lafsalot · August 2013

I agree, but I have a question for the second time plus moms- I hear the you just wait, you'll never have a clean house again comment... And I think um, no, if I pick things up and clean my house will be clean and if my little one understands we out things away and we make a game of it, she will appreciate a clean house too. Do moms who have other kiddos have tidy homes?

PeachsMama · August 2013

lafsalot said:

I agree, but I have a question for the second time plus moms- I hear the you just wait, you'll never have a clean house again comment... And I think um, no, if I pick things up and clean my house will be clean and if my little one understands we out things away and we make a game of it, she will appreciate a clean house too. Do moms who have other kiddos have tidy homes?

This pisses me off too! I'm diagnosed OCD and keep a VERY clean house.. I understand that there will be toys and dirty bottles but does that mean that I can't teach my child to pick up after them selves and we have to live in filth?? NO! Quit telling me my house is gonna be nasty.. Just because you never taught your children what chores are and how to be clean people in general doesn't mean my children will be that way.. I baby sat for a mom who had two kids and her house was always immaculate! And when I watched her kids you never had to tell them "put that away" They just did it! Because she taught them! Crazy how that parenting thing works..

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