Shower Crashers

MzCurnett8886 · August 2013

Let me preface this by saying my sisters are the hostesses but because both are busy they asked me to check if the park pavilion they rented allowed a bouncy house that Sister B's boyfriend owns and they wanted to use for the kids of guests coming. I asked a local mom's group to see if anyone had tried this before, I had several moms tell me that the park is open to the public (the park yes, the pavilion no) and that they would be at the park the day of my shower and I can't stop their child from using the bouncy house, desserts or the pavilion where our party will take place. Sister B has a few friends that would be there to help with set up, food, and security if need be. Should I actually be concerned about these moms crashing my shower? Would you be concerned if this was your party as the guest of honor or hostess?

mysticl · August 2013

I would ask the park if they allow the bouncy house, I would also check with them on their policy for pavilion rental, and what their procedure is if someone else tries to use it when it has been rented out.

I would find it odd for people to come up to a pavilion that is being used for a private party and try to join in. I've never seen it happen at any event I've been at. However, I could see random children being attracted to the bouncy house and try to play in it. They may not understand the idea of a private party.

EastCoastBride · August 2013

I'm side eyeing these moms. Yes - bouncy house - it's going to be hard to keep other kids away. But the pavillion and food? WTF to those moms. Id honestly be rethinking the bounce house, and maybe even the venue all together.

mZito · August 2013

Who goes anywhere near a party they weren't invited to & helps themselves? Kids? I understand them but adults? Hmm, no, that's weird.
I'd be a little concerned but if you have people there telling the party crashers to go elsewhere it may not be bad.

EastCoastBride · August 2013

I'm going to add- if I went to a park and saw a bounce house, I'd think "Oh- what special event is the park putting on". Bounce houses in public places usually mean fun public event.

Just a party in a pavillion? wouldn't even look twice, though.

The bounce house will attract attention, and to that point - yes, I actually more see what those moms were saying. Kids would come over to use the house, then probably assume that the cake and food is for them too. And it WILL be hard to stop them.

MzCurnett8886 · August 2013

The party area is separated by a fence from the playground equipment and splash park so my hostesses are setting up gates, I think, but I'm really not sure. The pavilion, a grassy area (where we'd be setting it up) one set of bathrooms, are all fenced together and then down some stairs and a hill is the rest of the park (about 250feet). There are stairs that are not connected to the pavilion so it doesn't cut off public access. I'll see what B thinks about not having it but she thought it was a nice touch with the carnival theme and since it was free she was just trying to add some flair.

KatFCo · August 2013

I agree with rethinking the bounce house, for no other reason than if a stray child did happen to wander in and get injured, you all could be held liable.

But if people have actually stated they will be coming to help themselves (majorly side-eying that!), then definitely have some people designated as security to make sure no one comes in. "Public place" doesn't mean all events become public.

MMason12 · August 2013

KatFCo said:

I agree with rethinking the bounce house, for no other reason than if a stray child did happen to wander in and get injured, you all could be held liable.

But if people have actually stated they will be coming to help themselves (majorly side-eying that!), then definitely have some people designated as security to make sure no one comes in. "Public place" doesn't mean all events become public.

I agree! You (and the hosts) would be financially liable if something happened to anyone's kids.

I cannot believe that someone would actually think that it is okay to let their kids play in a play hour, eat food, or them/kids crash a party at the park or pavilion they were not invited to. It's amazing how rude people have gotten these days.

Babi2comingSoon2014 · August 2013

whoa! crazy mommy group LOL... imo if you guys want to have the party there and the park okays the bouncy house than do what youve planned, you shouldnt have to uproot your entire plan because some people cannot/will not control their children.
It sounds like it would be good to have security too in this case, it will draw attention but once people realize its not a public event that should be the end of it, and if its a problem that little timmy is going to scream because the bouncy house isnt for him than maybe little timmy doesnt need to be rewarded with a playdate at the park (imo)
if you feel thats too much stress than possibly move party, if your hostess wants to keep location than she well intends to handle any problems and you can have a good time and enjoy yourself

Babi2comingSoon2014 · August 2013

whoa! crazy mommy group LOL... imo if you guys want to have the party there and the park okays the bouncy house than do what youve planned, you shouldnt have to uproot your entire plan because some people cannot/will not control their children.
It sounds like it would be good to have security too in this case, it will draw attention but once people realize its not a public event that should be the end of it, and if its a problem that little timmy is going to scream because the bouncy house isnt for him than maybe little timmy doesnt need to be rewarded with a playdate at the park (imo)
if you feel thats too much stress than possibly move party, if your hostess wants to keep location than she well intends to handle any problems and you can have a good time and enjoy yourself

Noethola · August 2013

You could always give out special bracelets to kids of families invited. And then you could charge anyone else who uses it. Make yourself some extra money to put toward your baby things!

J/k. Put up lots of signs that it is a private party or a baby shower. I would think most people would get the idea.

MzCurnett8886 · August 2013

Well Ladies, Parks and Rec won't allow the bouncy house, however my sister B is still getting some carnival style games to set up from her boyfriend. Sister A apparently has some security guys from the arena she works at coming in as a favor to her to walk around if need arises. She said "I have no problems getting some woman arrested for acting tacky" so I know she has no qualms in calling the cops. Sister A is bringing in her private party signs, gates, so hopefully that keeps the crazy out!

MzCurnett8886 · August 2013

discobelle said:

What is wrong with these people? How do they know the date of your shower if they aren't invited?

I never said the date, just stated that it was in a few weeks. I had 10moms say they would show, but with no date I wonder how many will actually get the correct date.

MMason12 · August 2013

Watch them stalk the park for the next few weeks just to make sure they are there. @-)

agentkitten75 · August 2013

I never post on this board , but, I had to for this . Those moms in that group sound like horribly lonely childish people. I mean seriously who says that they made gonna crash a baby shower?!??!? What a bunch of losers!

EastCoastBride · August 2013

Joy2611 said:

EastCoastBride said:

I'm going to add- if I went to a park and saw a bounce house, I'd think "Oh- what special event is the park putting on". Bounce houses in public places usually mean fun public event.

Really? I've seen several around here in the city and my first thought is always "I wonder who has the money to rent one of those! Fun birthday party!"
I've never considered them public at all.

I've never seen a bounce house in a public setting like a park that was for a private party. In a private backyard, yes, but not in a park. If DS saw one from afar, we'd absolutely go over wondering what was going on.

neverblushed · August 2013

I would check with the park on this.

A moon bounce will attract the attention of small kids in the park, and parents will be hard-pressed not to at least come over and check to see what the deal is.

Are you prepared to have a few random park visitors come up and ask if they can take a turn in the moon bounce? If you think it's okay to say "sure, take a turn" to desperate moms whose kids have caught sight of a moon bounce from across the playground, then go for it. If you don't want to attract strangers, then skip the moon bounce. Guests who bring their kids to the shower can take their kids to the jungle gym instead.

The park near my home has pavilions that people can rent for a day. They are clearly marked OCCUPIED when they are rented. I think people pretty much "get it" when they see the a RENTED sign and tablecloths on the tables, that there's a private party going on and they can't just belly up to the refreshments.

EastCoastBride · August 2013

Joy2611 said: There was one in the next block over from us a few weeks ago. It was just set up in the middle of the street for the 4th of July. I assumed it was just for that block and their private party. I'd think the same thing in a park, too. Perhaps I'm weird :-)

In a residential neighborhood, I would actually assume block party too and "private".

It's just in a PARK, I would think there was some neighborhood event going on and that it would be relatively public. Not a baby shower/ kids b-day party where there is an issue or concern over who is using it.

TLRachelle · August 2013

As a former youth director, I just want to pipe in and say, I only used bouncy houses on private property and I had special insurance to cover them. Insurance does not cover public property as far as I know. I would ditch this location and call my home insurance company to see if this is covered and where. Better safe than sued. You can do permission slips for kids participating in the bouncy house but they don't hold up in court if someone gets seriously injured or killed - just sayin'. I would throw the shower in a location that I can rent and privatize if you want it private. If you throw it in a public venue, you're inviting the public to crash your party. You're better off overall in a private location.

Unknown · August 2013

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PalmettoBaybee · August 2013

We go to birthday parties in parks with bouncy houses all the time. Not only that, but we often go to the park when there's a private party going on with a bouncy house. Guess what, I'm able to redirect my kids to the other play areas and keep them entertained without having them crash a party! Holy rudeness!

BC&LM · August 2013

Wow, that is so tacky. If you rent a pavilion, it is yours and not available to just anyone. These moms need to get over their sense of entitlement and learn some tact. I hope they don't crash your shower!!!

BC&LM · August 2013

TLRachelle said:
If you throw it in a public venue, you're inviting the public to crash your party. You're better off overall in a private location.

A rented pavilion is NOT a public venue just because the larger area (park) is a public venue. If I rented a room at a restaurant, but the rest of the restaurant was still open to the public that day, would you say I was inviting the rest of the restaurant patrons to crash my private party in my rented room? Your logic doesn't make sense.

BC&LM · August 2013

somerandomchick said:

BC&LM said:

TLRachelle said:
If you throw it in a public venue, you're inviting the public to crash your party. You're better off overall in a private location.
A rented pavilion is NOT a public venue just because the larger area (park) is a public venue. If I rented a room at a restaurant, but the rest of the restaurant was still open to the public that day, would you say I was inviting the rest of the restaurant patrons to crash my private party in my rented room? Your logic doesn't make sense.
A restaurant is not public property. This is one of the things you have to be careful about if you

Even though restaurants are privately owned, the rest of the restaurant is completely open to the public when you rent a private room. Only tacky, ill-mannered people would purposely crash a private party at a restaurant. When you rent a pavilion at a park, you should get receive the same treatment you would if you rent a room at a restaurant. It doesn't matter if one is publicly owned and one is privately owned; in both cases you are paying money to have the space to yourself. You shouldn't be told to have your party somewhere private or accept tacky party crashers. Now, if no money was paid to secure the pavilion, that might be a different story. But once money is paid, you should expect to have the venue to yourself.

RibbitGrl930 · August 2013

That floors me that moms would think it's okay for their kids to crash a party. Like PP have said, I can understand the kids' curiosity being piqued by the bouncy house and them wanting to check it out, but the food? What are they as moms not doing to thepoint where their kids will think it's okay to eat somebody else's food? No. Just no.

jencnh · August 2013

Well, since you can't have the bounce house anyway, it is now a non-issue. However, I wouldn't tell those childish moms, so if they do come to crash the party with the bounce house, they will be disappointed!

BakerMommy · August 2013

RibbitGrl930 said:
That floors me that moms would think it's okay for their kids to crash a party. Like PP have said, I can understand the kids' curiosity being piqued by the bouncy house and them wanting to check it out, but the food? What are they as moms not doing to thepoint where their kids will think it's okay to eat somebody else's food? No. Just no.

ITA! I took my kids to the zoo a few weeks ago and a kid was having a picnic party in the field area. DD wanted a balloon. Did I tell her to go grab one? Heck no! It was a prime opportunity to talk about not always getting what we want. Then I got to deal with an epic tantrum. But guess what? She won't always be invited to every party and needs to get used to dealing with it without throwing a fit.

Parenting: not for pansies.

Snooches07 · August 2013

Seriously? I would never walk up to a food table just because it was at a public park if I can clearly see there is a special occasion going on like a shower. Make sure to have balloons to make it obvious that this a private party. Wow? Seriously people?!

StayingSecret · August 2013

For your friends (I know the issue is semi-settled), I wonder if they were just warning you that other people would think that way. You know in a "Just in case you haven't thought about it, other moms might let their kids join in on your party and you won't be in a great position to stop them."

If they really meant "You can't stop me from sending my kids over to help themselves, just try and stop me. ha ha ha!", then I'd question not just the venue, but the friendship.

hlb622 · August 2013

The pavilion in our local county park is open to the public on a first-come, first-served basis -- unless it's rented. When you pay to rent it, you are issued a county permit for use that must be posted during your event. If there are occupants and/or crashers, you are instructed by the language of the permit to call the police to have them removed.

Just an aside, if there are portable toilets on site, I'd give the county/city a cal to ensure they're cleaned (aka emptied) before your party.

MzCurnett8886 · August 2013

UPDATE: My shower was this weekend. It was great, Charlotte's web themed, we had the old cartoon movie going while opening gifts so kids would be entertained, some fair style games and themed food like pig shaped sandwiches and some fair style food. We got several great gifts and my sisters went above and beyond.

And about 10FAMILIES try to crash. My sister called the city who brought in the police and they were escorted off the rented area and then the police officers stayed for a minute for some food and lemonade. After that we didn't have anyone try to come by, but I was still floored by crazy parents. It was a great party regardless but just wanted to let you ladies know that people did indeed try to crash my party.

ceh789 · August 2013

Who does that? I just absolutely don't get the thought process that ends with packing up your family to go crash a party.

ArgyleBride · August 2013

Wow. Unbelievable. Was it the moms from the group?

Disneygeek77 · August 2013

What was their reaction when the police escorted them off.

KatFCo · August 2013

I was hoping you'd come back to update us, but I can't believe people actually tried to crash it up to the point it was necessary to call the police to get them away! Did they really just refuse to leave when informed it was a private party? I know you're serious, but I can't believe there are people with that kind of gall.

BallSox · August 2013

They must have a tailor on call to make adjustments to their pants because their balls must be HUGE. LIke so big they are freakishly abnormal. How big must they be to just show up at a party they aren't invited to?

Wow. Well played \#/s, well played.

MzCurnett8886 · August 2013

The parents actually seemed mad at US! At first my sister saw people she didn't know in our buffet line and their kids playing our carnival games and politely told them it was a private party. They said "I don't see any signs" in which my sister then pointed out her private party signs. Apparently some parents were telling her how stupid it was to have a private party at a public park and refused to leave the area. That's when my sister called the city and as a precaution I was told they always bring the cops. It wasn't a huge deal but my sisters did try to keep it out of the view of our (invited) guests so I'm not sure what all was said.

bnik · August 2013

That's just craziness

kjenkins346 · August 2013

MzCurnett8886 said:

The parents actually seemed mad at US! At first my sister saw people she didn't know in our buffet line and their kids playing our carnival games and politely told them it was a private party. They said "I don't see any signs" in which my sister then pointed out her private party signs. Apparently some parents were telling her how stupid it was to have a private party at a public park and refused to leave the area. That's when my sister called the city and as a precaution I was told they always bring the cops. It wasn't a huge deal but my sisters did try to keep it out of the view of our (invited) guests so I'm not sure what all was said.

That is CRAZY! Who are these people? First of all, why would you assume that a public park would just have free food and activities? Then if you really are that stupid/arrogent and someone tells you it's a private party, saying that there aren't signs or you didn't "see them" so they can't prove it's private??? I really can't believe there are that many people like this these days who force you to call the cops to kick them out but I guess this is the trend of entitled people who just expect to be able to do what ever they want and take advantage of the normal people who assume that most people know how to behave appropriately and are too nice to stand up to them.

EastCoastBride · August 2013

MzCurnett8886 said:

At first my sister saw people she didn't know in our buffet line and their kids playing our carnival games and politely told them it was a private party. They said "I don't see any signs" in which my sister then pointed out her private party signs. Apparently some parents were telling her how stupid it was to have a private party at a public park and refused to leave the area.

This is unbelievable. It's one thing if they really thought "Oh- there's a small carnival" (even though I would think "carnival type games" wouldn't be quite the same as an actual carnival!!) and thought it was a public event. I'm not "OMG!" about that aspect.

BUT when told it is, in fact, a private event - I just can't believe they refused to leave! Who does that?!?!

RibbitGrl930 · August 2013

EastCoastBride said:

MzCurnett8886 said:

At first my sister saw people she didn't know in our buffet line and their kids playing our carnival games and politely told them it was a private party. They said "I don't see any signs" in which my sister then pointed out her private party signs. Apparently some parents were telling her how stupid it was to have a private party at a public park and refused to leave the area.

This is unbelievable. It's one thing if they really thought "Oh- there's a small carnival" (even though I would think "carnival type games" wouldn't be quite the same as an actual carnival!!) and thought it was a public event. I'm not "OMG!" about that aspect.

BUT when told it is, in fact, a private event - I just can't believe they refused to leave! Who does that?!?!

Jerks. That's who does that. Self-important and entitled jerks.

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