Opinions on Second Child - Repost from Babies on the Brain.

SleepingBeauty79 · August 2013

If you are a second or third time mom, why did you want to have another child? I am in that stage where I am constantly going back and forth regarding a second and I am leaning toward just having one. Thanks for any feedback.

WhitWed · August 2013

We were adamant on being one and done, but had such a blast with DD that we went for it when she was 1. We got pregnant and unfortunately had a miscarriage at 6wks. The next month we got pregnant again and just had DS! We now have 2 and they are 23mo apart; we are definitely done and I had a tubal. It's challenging because I forgot how time consuming a newborn is, but adding a toddler to that is a whole new level of exhaustion. However, having two has also exceeded my expectations and I'm so glad we did it. Do what feels right for your family!

memali26 · August 2013

We always knew we'd have at least 2. We just had no desire for an only child. I love having two kids. Seeing them play together and love each other is amazing - truly the greatest blessing of my life. There is no guarantee that siblings will always grow up to be friends, but I hope that my girls will always have each other (and their new sibling-to-be) to go through the ups and downs of life together.

prazenjc · August 2013

I wanted DS to have a sibling experience and have someone in his life after his dad and I are gone.

meggers102 · August 2013

I always knew I would have more than one. We were together for a week with my family and we have 5 girls between the ages of 6 months - 7 yrs. After seeing them all play with each other my DH and I decided to have our 2nd sooner than anticipated because of how much fun and joy the girls all had together. We wanted that happiness in our home daily! Now have a 2 yr old and a 7 week old. It is hard but I can't imagine our life w/o our little guy! I hear people say, "Oh, I wish we would have had 1 more!" but never, "I wish we would have had 1 less." You have to do what is right for your family.

trudibell · August 2013

We just had our first, but we definitely want to try for a second - after our son is done with diapers! So ideally 3-4 years from now.

summerandmatt · August 2013

prazenjc said:

I wanted DS to have a sibling experience and have someone in his life after his dad and I are gone.

This! Being an only child I know how hard it will be to carry the burden of aging (and demanding) parents alone. I didn't want DD1 to have to deal with that. Also, I love how close DH's siblings are and I hope DD1 & DD2 will have that.

JCWhitey · August 2013

I've only got one right now but I absolutely would not want to have my child be an only child. The greatest memories of my life revolve around my brother. I cannot imagine what my life would have been like without him... really lonely I feel, even with friends around. DH has a sister and they didn't have the greatest relationship growing up, but now are best of friends and he agrees with my stancve on this.

So, we're hoping for at least 1-2 more. DH would have way more if he got his way (he keeps saying he wants 6-8, eek!), but I think 2-3 is a good number.

blush64 · August 2013

I always wanted more than one or two kids. I really enjoy raising them, watching and helping them grow and mature. I grew up with sisters and a brother and I want my kids to have a sibling as well. I could not imagine just having had one. Due to the huge difference between my first two and my third I am actually planning my fourth.

We love the regular, everyday stuff involved with raising kids.

BreeNicoleE · August 2013

I am now a mom of three... after our first who is now 5 (6 in sept) we said we were done and we really had so much fun with just him, and being able to experience all his firsts. We wanted to make sure he had 100% of us and saw how some people (not purposely) seem to under-appreciate baby #2 and so forth... well eventually when he turned 3 we realized a sibling for him would be amazing as i myself was an only child (although 2 step sisters) so there was a lot of me time but I didn't always have someone around to play with.. So after deliberation we knew having a second was what we wanted. I miscarried at almost 4 months and it was devastating but we didn't give up and several months later ended up pregnant with dd1 and they are 4 years apart. I love the age gap as it is small enough for them to be able to play with each other but a big enough gap that I didn't have 2 in diapers. it was the best decision we have made.. We ended up being pregnant with dd2 and the girls would have been 21 month apart but she arrived early so we now have 2 under 2; a 21 month old and a 3 1/2 month old. luckily the timing was right so we are lucky enough to only have one in diapers this time around too! lol...

Our biggest fear is that we wouldn't be able to give our children all the love and attention they need. it was so easy to shower our son with love, but we didn't want any one to feel neglected or left out my having another baby. As much as parents say they would never do that, it was a big fear for us that it would be done unintentionally. So after deliberating and making sure we were financially ready we knew our little one needed a sibling because there's something amazing about sibling bonds... And I made sure each pregnancy milestone and each milestone of our babies as they started growing were celebrated just as much as our first instead of being compared and I can honestly say we have loved every minute of it and are so glad we decided to have more.

headgear03 · August 2013

My Dh and I always knew we wanted at least two possibly three kids when our oldest turned one we decided to try for a second since we wanted them close in age for the most part . I got pregnant right away . Our two oldest are 21 months apart . When our second was close to one we started talking about a third but decided to wait a few more months . We started trying for our third but didn't get pregnant for five months so our second and third are 27 months apart and honestly I love that age gap so much better then the 21 months . We thought we were done at three and were going to start taking more permanent measures if birth control when SURPRISE we found out we were expecting so now we have a 5 year old , 3 year old , 18 month old and 3 week old . Its a bit crazy right now but exh of our kids brings something special to our family and I wouldn't change a thing. I'm an only child and hated it . I grew up away from family most of the time so it was super lonely at times and I didn't want that for my kids . I know there not always going to get along even now they fight a bunch but I do hope that they can become closer when there older .

kanga1622Wed220857 · August 2013

I was one and done until DS1 quit nursing at 27 months. Then DH and I talked and neither of us felt completely done or desperate for another.

So we decided to stop preventing and let God decide. We gave ourselves a time limit and figured if we weren't pg with another after a couple of years, we'd be thrilled to stay a family of 3.

We got pg very quickly with DS2 and now our family is complete. It is absolutely wonderful to watch DS1 love on his brother. I worry because I spend so much time nursing and holding a sleeping baby that DS1 doesn't get enough attention from me right now but I know this stage will soon pass and I will be able to have more individual time with both boys.

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Opinions on Second Child - Repost from Babies on the Brain.

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