Would you use a "leash" on your child?

PrettyInPearls23 · July 2013

This poll stemmed from a FB post from my local radio station re: use of child "leashes" in public places. It got well over 500 comments and I was astounded at some of the comments. I was really curious as to how many of those who said no were actually parents or not, so I thought I'd see what you ladies thought.

michelle7482 · July 2013

I never thought I would say yes but my daughter has hit this tantrum throwing, refusing to hold my hand stage so I voted yes, but only at a place like the zoo or an amusement park. I wouldn't use it as a daily thing.

princessvespa1 · July 2013

Another controversial subject - this could get interesting.

I have one, and use it when we go to places like fairs, airports, basically any heavily populated areas. He won't stay in the stroller and he likes to have some independence. I don't care if other people don't like it. I like it because I know my kid is safe and has not bolted or been taken. He likes it because he can discover things on his own without having to hang on to me. It's a win win for us.

PrettyFade · July 2013

I am open to it once he's walking off and curious about the world. Probably only airports, zoo's, etc. Not for walking down the street.

MallardDucky · July 2013

Yes I have used one. When we lived in Korea the oldest had the one that looked like a monkey. There are basically no sidewalks and Koreans (along with some Americans) drive like crazy as in stop lights are merely suggestions. I had peace of mind knowing that he could walk on his own and still be safe while I pushed the stroller and groceries. With ducky2 he has a puppy one that gets used at big places like airports zoos.

Never say never

IrishPiratess · July 2013

I have no issues with people using them. I run the info and merch booth for a major festival every year (we have 16,000 people come through in three days) and I am the central location for when kids get separated from their parents.

I also plan to get a stash of Tot-toos to stick on my kid. I have to be the one to try and calm the parents while working with security to find the missing child on a huge working farm property. That look is one of sheer terror, and I will do whatever I can to make sure that Im not the one being calmed. Better safe than sorry.

revlaurawittman · July 2013

I always swore that I would never do that! But now that I'm getting ready to have a baby and I already have a VERY fast two year old, I'm so scared that he's going to run off and I won't be able to catch him. I know they may look ridiculous, and I may get the side-eye, but I would much rather my child be safe and within my reach!

OpheliaChem · July 2013

I said SS - and I NEVER pick SS!

STM but I don't need a leash. I'm not saying I wouldn't use one but I don't have to with DD. That's not to say that I won't when LO comes along, or if we are in a crowded place that I'm afraid of losing her. Using leashes can be justified but I admit I'd be embarrassed to use one. As long as you aren't using it to babysit your kid or to drag your kid behind you, you can do whatever you want!

MegStark · July 2013

I'm not against it at all. We were at a MLB game with some friends and they forgot to bring their monkey backpack/leash for their little boy (they have 3 kids but the girls don't run off)... and what do you know.... he was with us one second and gone the next. All 6 adults missed him running off and we had to go searching. It only took a few minutes to find him, but still..... that leash would have been handy in such a crowded place.

AppleMuffins · July 2013

I'm definitely open to it. Safety is my top priority, not what other people may think of me. If I have to go somewhere very crowded, then lo will probably get a backpack leash. Dh doesn't like them, but he and I enjoy attending festivals and don't want to give that up when a kid comes. A stroller wouldn't be convenient. Sometimes in NYC my husband and I have a hard time not getting separated in the crowd. I won't let that happen with my child.

Funny story though. I work as a nanny and for a period of about two weeks the 3 year old boy I sit for wanted to wear the leash. We just went to the following playground or to pick up his sister from school so it was totally unneccesary but he just wanted to lol the nice part is that it kept him focused on walking so he kept up with ms rather than stopped to check everything out or lagged behind like usual. It's not like I was pulling it or anything, he just did it. He was so proud of himself lol

redfallon · July 2013

When I saw the title of this post, I thought, "Absolutely." As PPs said, in crowded places when LO is old enough to want to walk around and not be in a stroller, I have no problem with the thought of putting a leash on my kid.

I was with my aunt and uncle when we lost my little cousin at a Wal-Mart once. He was about 4 years old at the time. We found him before we left the Wal-Mart. I was a teenager, but that was one of the scariest things I've ever experienced. I can only imagine what my aunt and uncle were going through.

ravenclaw1 · July 2013

I don't even understand why this is a hot topic. who cares? it's not child abuse

I am 100% in the camp that if you need it and it works for you, use it.

EMLYNNLERETTE · July 2013

I was always a parent who said no way. I never ever used one until our flight from WI to TX a couple of months ago. I knew I was easily winded and that she is fast. I totally bought one. I would rather be judged than not have my child because someone was able to snatch them when she got out of sight. I didn't end up needing it since she stayed in her stroller, but I would have!

PrettyInPearls23 · July 2013

ravenclaw1 said:

I don't even understand why this is a hot topic. who cares? it's not child abuse

I am 100% in the camp that if you need it and it works for you, use it.

This is my thought process as well, which is why I couldn't believe some of the ignorant comments on the FB post. People were saying that using leashes was "lazy parenting" and that strollers should be used instead. I'm still trying to figure out how having your child sitting in a stroller being wheeled around couldn't be perceived as being lazy? Or, there was the whole "If you can't control your kid, don't take him/her out in public!" And lets not forget the "leashes are for dogs!!" ones too. Asinine comments, really.

missmuffin87 · July 2013

I don't care what other people do, but it's not for me. I have been known to choose overalls for crowded outings, just so I have something to grab onto really quick. But for the most part, if DD doesn't want to hold hands/ walk responsibly then tough shit, she loses the privilege and gets carried or put in the cart or stroller.

Burrberrymum · July 2013

I'm a FTM and said no pretty much because where I live I just wouldn't need it, if I have a stroller that should be just fine, we don't have any zoos or museums or anything interesting or large crowds of people for that matter so it just wouldn't be necessary. I've also seen kids throwing tantrums on those leashes too which can't be any better then a tantrum off of it.. Not sure though. It's not something that I would spend money on but if I got one as a gift and left this city for an amusement park of some sort then maybe I would consider it, since large crowds gives me anxiety as it is.

atcwag · July 2013

I'm very sensitive to this subject because my younger brother NEEDED a "leash" for safety. He is on the autism spectrum and had severe, sometimes violent outbursts often without warning. If it weren't for the "leash", we never would have been able to leave the house, or he would have been in constant danger - running into the street, running away from my mom, etc.

I remember being very embarrassed at the time because people would whisper, or outright talk about my brother/mom. However, until you have a child that is truly putting themselves in danger, you don't know....

JocelynB0911 · July 2013

If you want or need one for you child then so be it. I debated about getting one for our son as he is a "runner" but we have been able to work on holding hands and he is doing really well with that. Even the short walk from the garage to our home he is grabbing my hand or his sister's.

I would neve judge someone who needed to use one for their kid/s.

staceymack · July 2013

FTM, I'm open to the idea. Having twins and being on an opposite schedule as DH means we'll be on our own with them. I'm open to using it at that age when they like to take off running in public. Especially, places like airports, malls, etc. I'm all for safety.

When I was 16 I was driving through a shopping mall parking lot. A small kid darted across the parking lot out of nowhere. The only thing that kept me from hitting him was the grace of God! That experience left a scar.

rab2006 · July 2013

I registered for one when I had DD. We have never used it (although we did try once shortly after DD learned to walk). I personally wouldn't use it for every day errands, but we go to a lot of "larger" events like the local state fair, etc. That was the purpose of registering for it. And not so much because I can't keep an eye on my child or shes' out of control, but more because of my fear of the people around us. I have no clue what that stranger 10 ft away is thinking or capable of doing. While I always hold hands with my daughter when we're out, if we're in a large crowd, I like the idea of the extra security.

CutieBean79 · July 2013

I voted SS. I'm a STM and have not seen a need to use one with DD1. For her, I would say probably not because she is a good listener and doesn't stray from me. However, I will never say never. I have not met DD2 or more future children, I don't know how they will behave, and if it's a matter of safety then I would use one. I don't judge others who use them.

mmdd20 · July 2013

ravenclaw1 said:

I don't even understand why this is a hot topic. who cares? it's not child abuse

I am 100% in the camp that if you need it and it works for you, use it.

This exactly. We haven't had to use one on DS because he just isn't a runner. But now that we have two, I am certainly open to the idea if needed. I also understand tall parents using them. We have friends who are both order 6' and their daughter was walking at 10 months old. The had to hunch completely over to hold her hand and went with a leash for things that would included hours of walking to help save their backs.

EOB584 · July 2013

I think that they certainly can serve a great purpose when used appropriately. Kids are fast and when you have more than one to keep up with you do what you need to. I don't have one for DD but I have seriously considered it. She doesn't want to be in the stroller anymore at 2.5 but also refuses to hold my hand sometimes when we are in busy public places. I mentioned to my SIL that I should get one and she told me she would never speak to me again if I used one - and I'm sure she was serious because that is how she just is. I have seen people use them and they really are dragging the kids around - that is not what they are intended for and I would never use it that way. I see them as tools to keep your kid safe and close but still give them a bit of freedom while they learn to listen and stay close on their own.

JamieWM · July 2013

Hard to have an opinion as a FTM but my parents didn't harness me up and I was an animal. I am hopeful I can handle this little dude without even thinking of a leash

mmdd20 · July 2013

twolittlewheels said:

I voted "STM, absolutely would use one"

TTM, and I've never needed one, but wouldn't hesitate to use one. DS was, and still is, a runner with slippery little hands. It only takes a half a second for him to bolt into traffic. I used the double stroller a lot since DS and DD were so close in age, but now both have "aged out" of the stroller so I'm not sure what I'll do when #3 is born. It's going to be really hard to hold DS's hand, push the stroller and get much else accomplished, not even mentioning getting anywhere without the stroller.

I was thinking about this too. I am sure one of the reasons we have been able to avoid it so far is that we out number DS and one of us is usually free to chase him down. But Iknow it won't be like that we we even the score.

Amusjh · July 2013

I never ever thought I would answer yes to this question. But, not for my DS, but my nephew. He has started running away in public places. We were at the County Fair over the weekend and kept taking off. It was so scary. I think if the child has a tendency to do that, they are needed for their safety.

msronzio · July 2013

I'm FTM and I just don't know!!!

I know it looks weird to me when I see it, but all it takes is a fraction of a second for something to happen...

fhgrl21 · July 2013

I never thought I would be one to say yes. But my 21 month daughter has started her terrible 2's early. I wouldn't use it all the time, but with a newborn, I would feel a lot safer with it.... No matter what people think... Safety is key!

caover · July 2013

I used them at the zoo one time. Problem for me is it isn't easy with twins...but I don't see anything wrong with it.

Dee2588 · July 2013

FTM here. I saw a lot of parents using them in Disneyland. If you have to use it then you gotta do what you gotta do to keep your kid safe. If I had to use it, I would.

dalia1584 · July 2013

I will admit I was one of those when I was younger and without children who harshly judged. I regret ever doing that. I have not used one yet but there have been several occasions when I would have. DD is not a runner but at graduations baseball games I would of had a little more peice of mind knowing she was safe and enjoyed the occasion more

llybeck · July 2013

atcwag said:

I'm very sensitive to this subject because my younger brother NEEDED a "leash" for safety. He is on the autism spectrum and had severe, sometimes violent outbursts often without warning. If it weren't for the "leash", we never would have been able to leave the house, or he would have been in constant danger - running into the street, running away from my mom, etc.

I remember being very embarrassed at the time because people would whisper, or outright talk about my brother/mom. However, until you have a child that is truly putting themselves in danger, you don't know....

This is exactly why I would never judge someone. I am a FTM and I don't think I want to use them, I wouldn't say "never" but I don't think I am totally comfortable with it. However, I completely understand that every child is different and they require different levels of attention and discipline. If it works for the parent (and the kid) and they aren't using it as an alternative to paying attention to the child than I don't see what the problem is.

A37licia · July 2013

I voted STM, no. I have two kids already, and if we're going to a place where we need to be cautious about a young toddler walking around, we use the stroller or carrier and don't let them walk. We let them walk if they have been able to demonstrate obedience when out walking or if we're in a place they can have more freedom. I'm not opposed to the leashes overall though, and perhaps for certain temperaments and personalities, they're needed. But I haven't gotten one and don't plan to.

HBirdie · July 2013

auroraloo said:

I'm the SS. I would like to avoid it, but I refuse to say that I will NEVER do something.

I should've voted SS. I voted no, I wouldn't use it, but I like her point- I should never say never, especially since this is my first. I always side-eye it when I see it, but I don't care that much. I get why people use it, but like another PP said, I'd be embarrassed if I had to. My DH HATES them, so we probably won't.

MiamiAugBride · July 2013

I have a very fast 2.5 year-old and so far I haven't felt that we need it. He knows that if he runs off he gets immediately buckled in the stroller, so so far he's been ok. That's not to say I'd never use one if I thought we needed it. For example, I'll be flying by myself when he's 3 and the baby is 6 months and ill wear the baby through security, but I can see how needing to have him restrained would be extremely helpful, so I am open to it.

Gcrebel2006 · July 2013

We bought one to use for our Disney trip last spring. IMO, it allowed DD to stretch her legs periodically while still maintaining her safety. A leash is really nothing more than an extension of your hand.

smlowe9311 · July 2013

I've always said no I wouldn't and I still like to think that I won't but, after the stories I've heard of my DH and how he acted when he was little (doing things like running around the neighborhood butt naked IN THE SNOW multiple times) I think if LO has his personality in that regard we may have to just to keep her safe.

Ashley_mj · August 2013

I voted no way; but wouldn't be totally shocked if I changed my mind depending on my child and safety. I really think your average child can be taught at a young age not to run off, etc. so that's what I'd plan for/hope for.

magdalina.h · August 2013

Before being a mom to a toddler my answer would be hell no. Now it's no unless there is a certain circumstance like parades. Give a little freedom but not enough to run too far.

happybride 276 · August 2013

When I was much younger I thought they were ridiculous. I couldn't believe that people used them. Now that I am an adult and I actually understand the purpose I am open to the thought of using one. I honestly would like not to use it, but would if it meant keeping my child safe.

AngelMommy11211 · August 2013

I was always in the "no way" category until I had my son, who has autism and runs away frequently. He doesn't care if he gets lost, he's not afraid to be alone and he was non verbal for years. We lost him at mall of America. I literally glanced away and he ran off. He'd been a perfect angel the entire time we were there, until that moment he decided to run on a whim. So we use the leash at large places like the fair, mall of America, etc. I used to judge, but not anymore! Parents know their child, and I'd rather see them be safe than lost or stolen. I'm thankful nothing worse happened.