- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
September 2013 Moms
A37licia
member
Things I wish I knew before giving birth
A37licia
member
I think we're all close enough to start a running list. I gathered a list like this before my first, and it was really helpful either to have tips for some supplies to have on hand or just what to expect in the first post partum days.
Have some cash on you the few days after the birth. Often people will ask if there is anything you need or they can do for you. It is helpful to have a little cash if you feel comfortable asking them to pick up some milk or run to the pharmacy. Or even if you just need to order pizza.
Set up and set out everything you need for the baby before the baby is born
GO TO THE DENTIST. GET YOUR HAIR CUT. GET YOUR OIL CHANGED. Do all the little "routine" things that you do for yourself or make any "grown up" appointments now because after the baby is born, these things are harder to do and you have a cushion of time before needing to do them again.
Buy baby first aid things BEFORE the baby comes home. That first upset call to the doctor in the middle of the night and guaranteed they are going to ask for the baby's temperature, give tylenol, etc. It is a lot easier to have that on-hand to start.
Depends. Not pads, just get depends for the early days of post partum bleeding. I really like Always Infinity after that.
Have lots of just plain comfy T shirts ready to go. When your milk comes in you leak all over the place, plus the baby spits on you all the time. If you have a pile of clean shirts handy you can change quickly. If you have black T shirts, the milk leaking won't be as noticeable, especially if you have visitors around.
- Be ok with wearing maternity clothes for a little while after. Some of you will fit into pre-pregnancy clothes pretty soon, if so, good for you.
I like to have a nightlight in my room so I can see the baby at night without harsh light. I actually have this little plug in candle that uses a night light bulb, and feed baby by that light. It stays dark for him to associate night time, it's too bright for my eyes, but I can see what's going on.
In addition to pads get some witch hazel and witch hazel pads (in case you are healing a tear or birthed a hemrroid in addition to your new baby).
Dampen a pad with water and witch hazel...form it to your body, and then freeze it. It will be a great relief to soreness.
Pack diaper bag for use after birth before birth, so it's ready to go
I know it's great to be able to sleep on your tummy following the birth, after months of not being able to sleep that way, but be careful-- if you are sleeping on your tummy the night that your milk comes in, you will be in P-A-I-N.
- The first time your baby sleeps a longer chunk at night - you'll wake up sore and desperate to nurse. Your breasts will be really firm and hard, and you will probably have leaked.
You will forget something, so build fail safes into your life. A few diapers and travel wipes in the backseat pocket for when you forget the diaper bag.
Bring lots of energizing snacks and drinks, know how to use your breast pump and be familiar with an LC in your area in addition to your LLL leader. Both were invaluable to me during those first few weeks of learning to breastfeed.
We put the car seat in around 36 weeks, enough time for us to get used to actually having a car seat in there for the first time and not thinking we were in the wrong car. Silly, but helpful.
Ok what else ladies? Lots varies from one mother's experience to the next.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Things I wish I knew before giving birth
Bunny: 10.9.13
Jellybean #2 Due: 2.1.16
F16 July Siggy Challenge: Favorite Summer Activity
Hiking and Baseball Games with the Fam
It is really helpful info - thanks for making it and to those who contributed.
J+E ~ 08/25/2007 DD#1 ~ 05/11/2010 DD#2 ~ 09/25/2013 DD#3 ~ 06/09/2016 Baby #4 Due ~ 01/16/2023
Boy 7-11-2007 (has Autism),
Boy 2-26-2009 to 11-2-11 (had cancer at 4mo),
Boy 3-28-2011 (has Autism)
Girl 9-3-2013
Baby due 2-22-2016
I will add, fill up your netflix queue and put headphones at your nighttime nursing station along
with bottles of water. I watched 3 seasons of Burn Notice without waking H or DS while nursing overnight. Before bed put your laptop/ipad/tablet/something to watch on. I couldn't focus on reading at 12, 3, and 6 am, but I could zone out to a show.
TAKE STOOL SOFTENERS. PP pooping can hurt, but not nearly as bad if you're softening that shit (literally) up. Buy some Dulcolax, IB and Tylenol now so it's ready when you get home.
I totally second the stool softener thing. Not just stool softener, but drink prune juice and water like crazy as soon as that baby's born! I didn't poop for 10 days after DS was born: enemas, suppositories, and laxatives did nothing, and I think it's cause I waited to take anything for a few days... Yikes. I think it was 10x worse than my healing vag! Ha!
<a href="http://www.thebump.com/?utm_source=ticker&utm_medium=HTML&utm_campaign=tickers" title="Parenting Tips"><img src="http://global.thebump.com/tickers/tt18dcc8.aspx" alt=" Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker" border="0" /></a>
My only advice is:
a. know how much tylenol is ok for your LO, not just as a newborn, but when they are 1, 2, 3 months old, etc. Get a chart from your pedi. You can look them up online but its safer to get it from your pedi. When you need to administer tylenol at night, esp for a high fever, you don't want to wait around for the on-call nurse to call you back. And the tylenol box won't have dosages until age 2. And I second the "no IB before 6 months" - that's a definite no-no!
b. In general, pooping will be different. It doesn't hurt for everyone and it doesn't always take days to poop the first time, but you will probably be scared regardless. No one told me about hemorrhoids and how bad they can be. Just be prepared. If you have external and/or internal hemmies, you will be in some pain, possibly for months. But witch hazel and ointment can make you feel a lot better!
Squirt water bottle for after peeing was... New. But definitely glad to have it!
As for pooping, I was terrified but it wasn't as bad as I'd expected. I ate LOTS of fruits and veggies and the high fiber made everything work easily.
I love the second part, I normally am a go with the flow type of person but I feel like I may have a hard time if things aren't "perfect." I definitely need to remind myself that it's all going to be okay and if I have questions I have about a million family members and friends I can ask for help from.
OP: Awesome list and great additions from everyone, this is super helpful and makes me feel at least a little more ready!
Wear pjs/sweatpants for the first 2 weeks. It will force you/remind you to take it easy and relax and rest.
It is okay to send the baby to the nursery that first night (or second), you need sleep while you have the help. The nurses will bring your baby to you if you are BFing.
Let DH go home for one of the nights you are in the hospital. Him having a good night's sleep will pay off when everyone comes home.
Put your foot down with your policy on visitors, even if people have temper tantrums. As said above, YOUR time not Auntie Millie and your second cousin's time.
Stool softeners... yes.
Peri bottle... love.
It is very easy for you and DH to turn on each other when stressed out. Talk about it now and what you expect from each other/fears/worries, and try to remember you are both (usually) doing your best at the time. You need to be a team, not enemies. This is actually what my DH tells "soon to be new" parents.
Get out of the house (after the two weeks), even if it's to Target. It helps you catch your breath. MY DH used to kick me out after dinner and just walking around the store got rid of cabin fever and helped.
Remember- "this too shall pass". The hard stuff will start easing up- you WILL be able to relax and watch a movie or TV again at night, you WILL sleep all night again, you WILL heal, you WILL get time with DH again. It seems like it never will happen again in the thick of it... promise it will get better.
1. The peri bottle is a MUST for vaginal delivery even if you don't tear. Follow that up with a spray of Dermoplast. That stuff is miracle spray. You can get it at Walgreens and probably most pharmacies.
2. If you are having a girl, expect a mini period from baby. No one told us this and we were very upset thinking something was seriously wrong.
3. I agree to have a change of clothes for yourself in the car at all times. Who knows when you are going to be pooped on...
4. Have a grocery list of your staples made out before baby comes so you can have someone grab the items that you would normally like to have. This is awesome if someone offers!
5. Sleep with a towel under you for several nights PP until your body figures out what's going on. Between sweat, BM, and occasionally peeing yourself, it is 10x easier to get a new towel than to wake up your SO. A crib protector works well too if you have the flat kind and don't mind the crinkle sound.
DX Diminished Ovarian Reserve, Factor V Leiden Mutation, Secondary Infertility
MFI (SA #1Count 11mill, Motility: 18%, Morphology: 1%)
AMH .328 | FSH 13.2
1. Tearing- I had 4th degree tears which is the worst. Don't worry recovery wasn't that bad but during the 30 min stitch up DH, my mom and sister got to hold baby. I vividly remember looking over and feeling like I was missing out. Then DHs family was in the waiting room waiting to see DS. I felt obligated to let them in. I didn't have the immediate quality time I wanted. My advice is to get over feeling bad and demand to hold your baby and try nursing right away.
2. Yes, send dh home to sleep. It made the world of difference on the third day when I was exhausted.
3. It is normal for boys to pass a little blood in there pee.
4. Formula is not the enemy. My milk didn't come in until day 6 and it wasn't enough. Between nursing and pumping and formula, I felt like a bad mom that my boobies weren't working. Come to find out my 13 fibroid tumors might be blocking the ducts.
5. Scar tissue may grow over a stitch and it will have to be removed with nitrogen. It hurts like a bitch but definitely something I wish I knew about.
Assuming the hospitals still have them (they did when I had my son 8 years ago), they will provide you with these wonderful cooling maxi pads that don't exist in the outside world. Stuff as many as you can into your overnight bag to take home for the first few days postpartum!!!! My nurse said that she'd restock as she saw them disappear from the bathroom and to take a few with me. We literally cleared out the stash after she'd restock and she'd come back, smile, and re-stock. They provided so much relief and aren't available for sale anywhere else.
When your milk comes in or as baby starts cutting out nighttime feedings or sleeps longer, you will be engorged and leak. Maybe I'm lazy, but I got really tired of changing my shirt multiple times a night. I wound up finding it much easier overall to sleep wearing a comfy nursing bra with absorbent pads or topless on a towel. These times are going to be uncomfortable no matter what, but there's no reason to stick yourself with extra laundry on top of it!
I definitely second, third, fourth the whole not being afraid to say no to visitors. The day after I got out of the hospital (Without my babies, they were in the NICU) I had a whole ton of people that wanted to come in and see them. The morning was fine, with people coming and going, but then I had a rush of people come in at the same time. I was past the limit the NICU would actually allow in the room (They didn't tell me until after they all left). I ended up getting really overwhelmed and asking everyone to leave.
Ok back to the original subject at hand!
I gave my experience, and my suggestions. Which are different from the OPs. But silly me, I thought the point was to give different perspectives to help prepare people.
Now, tell me to GTFO with a cutesy little gif. You know you want to.
ETA: FYI, I'm probably going to link to this on another board, because it's ridiculous, and ridiculous shit gets cross-posted all the time. Just giving you all a heads up so you can prepare your "OMG YOU'RE EVIL FOR CROSS-POSTING" speeches.
Maybe I will post one just to ensure it does get an XP and we can all use our speeches that we prepared in advance just for your special self.
And no dear, there would still be questions on this. If you don't believe it you are in denial. But once again, someone starts something nice and here you come with your condescending ways seeming like you are invalidating her list. If you had something different to add then you should have added it not just listed what you agreed with from her list and what you didn't. It's like everyone thinks this is a helpful list and are adding their own ideas but then you stomp in saying "no,no,no not good enough!!" Typical.
Feel free to post this on whatever board you want and tell everyone how unnecessary my helicopter ride was. It's the one thing I can count on you to do today.
The peri bottle was my best friend, especially filled with warm water. Helps things to... go easier. I never spent the money on tucks, instead I bought witch hazel and soaked little cotton squares in a baggie and would lay them on my pad. Very refreshing. I was so sore because I had a 2nd degree tear. I couldn't do stairs for like a month.
Things I wish I knew about BFing was, make sure baby is swallowing. He might suck but not be getting anything and this could affect your milk flow. Your breasts will be leaky so wear pads. And dont expect to do anything other than nurse, eat, and sleep during the first month or so.
Your baby will most likely not sleep in the crib for the first few months. I don't know what I would have done without our swing. Sound machines & Halo sleep sacks are the best.
I was not criticising. If Alicia thought I was, that's on her.
I didn't say "not good enough" the post ASKED for people to add their thoughts and experiences. SO I DID. OMG.
How come you ONLY ever comment when you feel I've said something wrong, but never recognize when I give "good" advice or am quite helpful? Hmm? Because you don't want to admit that I'm not evil? That I might have something to add?
And I've never said a damned word about your helicopter ride. Or your experience over the past couple days, nor have I done anything to imply that it was unnecessary or superfluous. To imply that I would, or rather, flat out say that I would makes you a much worse person than you seem to think I am. Bad, bad form.
Looking at your past history, you have no issue bringing others l&d visits into conversations.
If I agreed with you I'd agree with it or thanks to the "love it" button would do so. And I think if I wanted to call you something I would have no issue doing so. If you honestly don't believe that then clearly you don't know how I operate. We both know I say what's on my mind.
Mom to Cam and Al, now expecting baby number 3, August 2016. Praying for lots of sticky baby dust!
And the fact that you haven't ever agreed with me, or "loved" a post proves my point that you do not acknowledge that I have anything to offer. So I'm not sure where you're going with that. The most recent post that comes to mind is the pumping at work post.
I have no idea what you're talking about in regards to wanting to call me something.
A) just because you owned something doesn't mean it's not a part of your track record. So no, I'm not forgetting you owned up to it but I'm also lot forgetting you said it either.
C) re-read what you wrote about me wanting to flat out call you evil. As I said above, if I wanted to call you that or something else I would.