freaking out

lyndsihutson · July 2013

So I have only had one AF since i had E, every 2 or 3 weeks i POAS just to rest easy... Well..... BFP twice tonight. I cannot stop crying. We live paycheck to paycheck now and have difficulties with baby sitters...how do we support another LO? i may sound crazy but, im also freaking out because i feel like im not going to be able to spend enough time/attention on E once LO2 arrives. Im so scared and i apologize for errors here but im using one hand and nursing with other. Maybe this is why my supply has dropped?

Hummingbirdbaby3 · July 2013

Oh wow! Despite your stress and concerns I have to say congratulations! I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. And this will work out! Sacrifice and hard work will get you through! And don't worry about time and attention!! Both LO just want and need love from mama and they'll get just that! Breathe! Take a breathe, sleep on it, and I promise you'll feel better. You've got plenty of time to figure it all out. Have you told SO?

sara785 · July 2013

redwood807 said:

I must say congrats as well! This is wonderful news, just not the best timing, no? You will be fine, LO will be fine. Hugs to you

This!

mariaculbreth · July 2013

Oh wow! Despite your stress and concerns I have to say congratulations! I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. And this will work out! Sacrifice and hard work will get you through! And don't worry about time and attention!! Both LO just want and need love from mama and they'll get just that! Breathe! Take a breathe, sleep on it, and I promise you'll feel better. You've got plenty of time to figure it all out. Have you told SO?
I completely agree!!

mariaculbreth · July 2013

I don't know why that didn't quote. Still trying to figure this new bump out I guess. :-?

jg1011 · July 2013

Hummingbirdbaby3 said:

Oh wow! Despite your stress and concerns I have to say congratulations! I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason. And this will work out! Sacrifice and hard work will get you through! And don't worry about time and attention!! Both LO just want and need love from mama and they'll get just that! Breathe! Take a breathe, sleep on it, and I promise you'll feel better. You've got plenty of time to figure it all out. Have you told SO?

This exactly! I know it feels,like so much now, but you will be fine! I heard someone once say that when you have children your heart grows a little for that child. I truly believe it. This LO and E will be wonderful friends and so full of love it will be incredible! Congratulations!

CurlyQ284 · July 2013

((Hugs)) you will find a way. I would feel the same exact way if I got a BFP right now. I would look into ways to increase your income and decrease expenses. Can you and/or DH look for a higher paying job to afford extra daycare or for you to SAH? Can one work days and the other nights so someone is home with the kids and you don't have to pay daycare? Can you eliminate any bills (cable, phone etc)?

As for not spending time with LO, you still have 8 months of alone time and they will love each other so so sooooo much. ((More hugs))

lyndsihutson · July 2013

Thanks for all the encouraging words. Yes he knows and is taking it WAY better than me. I didn't sleep last night and I just keep crying. I have a dr appt at 12 and I'm dreading it. @uconnhuskie007 thanks, you really made me feel a little better. I'm a bartender part time manager and server too. :-/ dh works full time as a meat cutter and part time as a bartender and server as well. I hope that rainbow appears soon!

Maebb · July 2013

I agree with all the PPs who said congrats, and you can do it! My mom is about a year apart in age from her sister, and they are like best friends. I might be tough when they're babies, but you'll figure out the money and time management part of it, and I'm sure you will be a great mom to 2u2!

winecastle14 · July 2013

@lyndsihuston I don't know what your religion is so I hope you aren't offended by this but I believe that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. Babies are hard and I understand your feelings about being pregnant again. In time you'll get adjusted to the idea and things will work themselves out. At least pregnancy lasts 9 (or 10) months so you have some time to prepare. Also, you have most of the baby items that you'll need already so the 2nd won't be nearly as expensive.

Babies are a precious gift so celebrate instead of being upset. As far as time for your 1st LO, I worry about that too when I think of having another baby but your LO is going to have SO much fun with her sibling! It will be a lot of fun to have them so close in age. Keep your head up and always remember that there is someone out there in a much worse situation than you. This is a blessing! Congrats!

Shermany · July 2013

There's some quote that I can't quite remember but it goes something like "More children don't divide the love you have to give, but multiply it." I wish you the best of luck with your expanding family! Plus, look how cute your first one turned out! :-)

lanea8712 · July 2013

I'm sure I would freak a little at first too, but children are huge blessings. I was one who didn't want kids until about two yrs before I had A. I didn't know what I was missing. I was only thinking money and work, which they are but So Much More. Like PP said, you have a while to warm up to the idea and things will work out! Your children will be close and LO will want to be your helper with Lo2. It will be ok, and this time around you'll have stuff learned under your belt!

Hummingbirdbaby3 · July 2013

AmberEA14 said:

@lyndsihuston I don't know what your religion is so I hope you aren't offended by this but I believe that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. Babies are hard and I understand your feelings about being pregnant again. In time you'll get adjusted to the idea and things will work themselves out. At least pregnancy lasts 9 (or 10) months so you have some time to prepare. Also, you have most of the baby items that you'll need already so the 2nd won't be nearly as expensive.

Babies are a precious gift so celebrate instead of being upset. As far as time for your 1st LO, I worry about that too when I think of having another baby but your LO is going to have SO much fun with her sibling! It will be a lot of fun to have them so close in age. Keep your head up and always remember that there is someone out there in a much worse situation than you. This is a blessing! Congrats!

I already responded, but after reading this I must agree! Whenever I was having a rough day or maybe B was a nightmare at nighttime, I would think about someone who would give anything to be able to spend their night rocking and snuggling a baby but can't. It's going to be a big change and adjustment, but one that you will look back on later with so much happiness.

Jenner37 · July 2013

Congratulations! As everyone has already said its scary at first but it will be the best thing in the end! Heck I was freaking out with my BFP last year and we were "ready"!

QuintonsMummah · July 2013

You are NOT alone

I had a major freakout when I got my BFP. I was NOT ready for the 3u3...I thought we were crazy enough with 2u2 for a short while. While I'm not traditionally religious, I will say that the universe gives us all that we can handle. Sure, it may not be easy but I'm more than confident that you and I can get through this

Luckily things turned around for us lately, FI got a new job but I was layed off recently and it hit us pretty hard. With #3 on the way, we will now have to get a new vehicle, house and did I mention we are getting married in November?

Seriously, tons of hugs to you and definitely feel free to PM me if you just want to talk or freak out or whatever! I'm here for you as well as all the other ladies on this board

:x CONGRATS!

QuintonsMummah · July 2013

uconnhuskie007 said:

Accidents happen. They do. Regardless I don't see the point of your ? At all at a sensitive time like this

Maybe she is wondering if she had a BC mishap like me......... 8-|

QuintonsMummah · July 2013

MandJS said:

redwood807 said:

uconnhuskie007 said:

uconnhuskie007 said:

Accidents happen. They do. Regardless I don't see the point of your ? At all at a sensitive time like this
Maybe she is wondering if she had a BC mishap like me......... 8-|
IMO, either way, as I'm sure you know then, what OP is going through and her outreach for support isn't the time for a PSA on faulty bc

I'm sorry where exactly in there do you get a PSA vibe? She was merely asking a legit question. I seriously doubt there was any insulting or "told ya so" intention in there. Some might say if you're NOT trying to get PG, you're trying. If you're not using BC, you leave yourself open to the possibility. That's just the reality. Like I said, it might be ill timed, but it's happened. Any pending baby is awesome. period (no pun intended)

I'm also curious.. @Uconnhuskie007... when exactly have I ever held back on what I've said or done? I don't see how someone being KTFU makes for a "sensitive" time. I asked a question because I was curious. Most times when someone gets an unexpected BFP, they share what BC failed. I know several unplanned pregnancies due to failed BC going on right now - not just @QuintonsMummah. So I asked.

@uconnhuskie007 - Did OP ask you to "defend" her in anyway? No. You complain a shit ton about people picking on you. Maybe if you didn't interject yourself in things that are non of your beezwax, you wouldn't feel so picked on yourself....just food for thought.

winecastle14 · July 2013

MandJS said:

redwood807 said:

uconnhuskie007 said:

uconnhuskie007 said:

Accidents happen. They do. Regardless I don't see the point of your ? At all at a sensitive time like this
Maybe she is wondering if she had a BC mishap like me......... 8-|
IMO, either way, as I'm sure you know then, what OP is going through and her outreach for support isn't the time for a PSA on faulty bc

I'm sorry where exactly in there do you get a PSA vibe? She was merely asking a legit question. I seriously doubt there was any insulting or "told ya so" intention in there. Some might say if you're NOT trying to get PG, you're trying. If you're not using BC, you leave yourself open to the possibility. That's just the reality. Like I said, it might be ill timed, but it's happened. Any pending baby is awesome. period (no pun intended)

I'm also curious.. @Uconnhuskie007... when exactly have I ever held back on what I've said or done? I don't see how someone being KTFU makes for a "sensitive" time. I asked a question because I was curious. Most times when someone gets an unexpected BFP, they share what BC failed. I know several unplanned pregnancies due to failed BC going on right now - not just @QuintonsMummah. So I asked.

I get where both of you are coming from @uconnhuskie007 has a personal attachment to this story and understands how the OP may feel. @MandJS was coming from a place of curiosity which I too was wondering if it was failed BC just because it's interesting to know. I am also with the school of thought- if you aren't NOT trying then you are trying but given that the OP said she'd been up all night crying, it probably could have been phrased a little better.

This is a case of two people on the opposite ends of the spectrum that both mean no harm to the original OP. I think we can just leave at that and not start a debate. But of course this is a public forum where people can post whatever they want so go for it if you want

lyndsihutson · July 2013

@mandjs I was on the mini pill but it was making me feel crazy so i quit taking it and I was just afraid of anything else because of BFing and i DO want another one in the next 2-3 years so no IUD would be worth it. So basically, Pull and Pray method. I guess it was irresponsible but it is what it is. and I am religious and I believe that things tend to happen for a reason and I will get through this. I just have to start focusing on the positives instead of negatives.

FWIW I went to the dr and im only about 3 weeks. The sack is forming and definitely pregnant.

winecastle14 · July 2013

uconnhuskie007 said:

Woah. Not starting anything. I remember that exact moment of pure fear, so I guess instinct lead me to defend.

No, no. I know you weren't (if that was in response to my post). I could just see it getting to that point with a couple of the replies and I was just saying that I see both sides and that neither person was intentionally trying to bash anyone. Sorry if you took it like I thought you were.

vettymama · July 2013

AmberEA14 said:

@lyndsihuston I don't know what your religion is so I hope you aren't offended by this but I believe that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. Babies are hard and I understand your feelings about being pregnant again. In time you'll get adjusted to the idea and things will work themselves out. At least pregnancy lasts 9 (or 10) months so you have some time to prepare. Also, you have most of the baby items that you'll need already so the 2nd won't be nearly as expensive.

Babies are a precious gift so celebrate instead of being upset. As far as time for your 1st LO, I worry about that too when I think of having another baby but your LO is going to have SO much fun with her sibling! It will be a lot of fun to have them so close in age. Keep your head up and always remember that there is someone out there in a much worse situation than you. This is a blessing! Congrats!

^WSS. Congrats!

lyndsihutson · July 2013

@uconnhuskie007 ygpm

CurlyQ284 · July 2013

Ugh, I just quit the mini pill it made me a raving lunatic. I know what you mean. Well, know that we are here! You better not leave us for your new BMB! Would that be early April? Did I count right?

143BabyCakes · July 2013

Congrats mama! You got this! When is your dr. follow up?

lyndsihutson · July 2013

CurlyQ284 said:

Ugh, I just quit the mini pill it made me a raving lunatic. I know what you mean. Well, know that we are here! You better not leave us for your new BMB! Would that be early April? Did I count right?

Haha I'm totally not going anywhere! And yes..something like that. I had AF june 1st just drop by to say hello. If that had been my LMP my DD would be 3-6-14 but that would put me at 8 weeks now and im only 3 according to the ultrasound so around april 10 I think. our anniversary is the 18th. guess we will celebrate with a baby!

lyndsihutson · July 2013

143BabyCakes said:

Congrats mama! You got this! When is your dr. follow up?

@143babycakes it is Aug 16. 3 weeks from now. They want me around 6 weeks for another ultrasound to measure things.

QuintonsMummah · July 2013

How far apart will your LOs be in age?

shella923 · July 2013

Congratulations!!! My brother was a surprise and we are 17 months apart . I cant imagine life without him.Trust me you will find a way to do this. Keep us posted. (Ps amazing right? If someone told you to use pull and pray to get pregnant you'd laugh...well there you have it! Was meant to be)

Sprite2012 · July 2013

Congrats to you, OP!

kjmommy1214 · July 2013

Congratulations! Everything does have a way of working itself out. You have a lot of support here.

LuckyMissus · July 2013

Oh my goodness, congrats!! Big hugs and deep breaths. Everyone else had such great things to say, so I'll just echo what they said and add that I agree babies are gift from God and you have great things coming your way!! Keep us posted!!

shella923 · July 2013

Also...it could be worse .., ran into my neighbor who was sobbing... Fiancé packed up and left two weeks before her shower. Is only helping with one month of rent ...they have eight months left. She was crying that she will never get married or have kids...so sad.

katigox · July 2013

Congrats! I'd be totally scared, too ~ but you got this one Mama.
If anything, maybe you can tell your DH to get-a-snipping soon if it's really such a financial burden ;D
Were you able to BF your LO? Are you hoping to with this one? I mean, that alone saves a good bit of money IMO

If anything, even if you're scared, continue to vent it here.
You obviously got plenty of women who want to be supportive

billybumbler · July 2013

Congrats! You will get through this and everything will turn out fine. I hope you feel better soon.

lyndsihutson · July 2013

@katigox thanks! yes i am still EBFing so that does help me! and @kiraliz i understand that but it doesn't take the fear away from the situation.

lyndsihutson · July 2013

@kiraliz absolutely nothing..

rachael_c26 · July 2013

IDK what exactly is going on in this thread, BUT
Congratulations!

I'm sorry the timing isn't perfect, but it rarely is. I wasn't prepared for my first BFP, but my H was awesome and it helped.

I'm glad your doc appt went well today. 3Wks? Yay for realizing so early.

And since I don't think anyone did yet (or it got lost in this nightmare of a thread), YES, PG could absolutely be the reason you've noticed a drop in your supply. I hope you talked to your doc today, but just remember to up your calories even more now.

Hugs.

lyndsihutson · July 2013

@kiraliz i know it will come with time. Just something i have to adjust to. It will all work out! Has to! :-)

Gargita · July 2013

Do any of your employers offer an Employee Assistance Program? There are typically a lot of great resources available through an EAP at no or very little cost to an employee.

I know the timing's not what you were hoping for, but congrats to you!

maven212 · July 2013

Congratulations! I know this is extremely stressful for very real reasons. My first pregnancy was a bit like this - at least at the very beginning. Now, I wouldn't trade a day. I'm not sure how I grew into it. I know I tried to kill some debt. I started clipping coupons...making reusable diapers etc. I promised mylf out loud that this would be a fun baby. All of these things may have served as distractions while I adjusted to the idea, but I adjusted. Things are scary, yes. The future is entirely unknown, yes....always, yes. Try to revel in the intimacy of this pregnancy. You are the only person on earth who can feel the presence of this little person. Just you. Even if the way you feel it is with your head over the toilet bowl, you are this little person's entire social circle right now. Their guardian, their bull dog, their midnight companion. There is something very special about that. You deserve to be able to take some time to appreciate that feeling. Make sure you take a break from the practical matters of this pregnancy to do so. You'll feel better.

lyndsihutson · July 2013

@maven212 call it hormones but you just made me cry. I feel so guilty because I don't feel happy at all like i did with my previous pregnancy. I feel as though its a bad thing and i really need to think of it as the innocent baby it is. It's little life is depending on me just like Emma's was.Thank you for that.

Want a personalized experience?

freaking out

Re: freaking out

Choose Another Board

Search Boards