TTC After a Loss

:::: Thursday Crazy Train ::::

Like many others, I am having some technical difficulties with TB. If I'm not able to respond, that's why!


Welcome to Crazy Train. This is a thread posted daily for any of us who need to get out our frustrations or vent about our cycles.

If you find yourself checking FF obsessively, MF is getting the best of you, POAS issues, let it out here!

Crazy level from 1-10:

CD/DPO:

Can I just ______ already?!:

Signs/Symptoms:

Explain your Crazy here:

image

TTC #1 since Sept 2011
BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
Blog   ​Chart

Re: :::: Thursday Crazy Train ::::

  • What a great conductor! You brought this train into the station within in one minute of it being opened up!

    The day the Bump died - Jasper is wise
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • Loading the player...
  • buggirl72 said:
    What a great conductor! You brought this train into the station within in one minute of it being opened up!
    I second this! Mrs E is the supreme conductor!!!!
    ;;)

  • buggirl72 said:

    What a great conductor! You brought this train into the station within in one minute of it being opened up!

    I second this! Mrs E is the supreme conductor!!!!
    ;;)

    Awwww ::blushes:: we make a good team! I've been trying to post this for a while lol. It finally worked!

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • Why is the quote box not in the right spot? Hmmph.

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • I'm hopppin on!  Good job conductor.

    Crazy level from 1-10:  8

    CD/DPO:  CD17 / 2DPO 

    Can I just __wake up when the 2ww is over____ already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  Nada

    Explain your Crazy here:  So because I am stubborn and don't want to start temping, I keep changing my O date.  I first thought it was CD14 but then I had another positive OPK on CD 15.  DH was too tired 8-| to DTD on CD 15 which really annoyed me.  I did wear him out though I guess on the few days prior to that.  So anyway, I had really bad ovulation cramps the other day so that's why I'm convinced I was O'ing on CD 15.  I'm praying we didn't miss the window and that DTD on CD 13 & 14 did the trick.  DH seems confident, me.....not so much.  We shall see.  I'm just really really really impatient. 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.

    BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.

    BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.

    BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section

  • Veganlady said:
    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.
    (((HUGS)))

    image
    image
    My Ovulation Chart
    TTC since March 2012 
    BFP #1 1/29/13, EDD 10/9/13 
    MMC discovered at 10 weeks (baby measured 9 weeks) D&C on 3/16/13 
    BFP #2  CP on 3/31/14
    BFP #3  8/11/14  EDD 4/22/14
  • Crazy level from 1-10:  7

    CD/DPO:  24/7 

    Can I just chill out already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  Really sore boobs and crampy. Normal LP symptoms for me.

    Explain your Crazy here:  I'm so torn about what I want from this cycle. I'm scared to death to get pregnant because I'm afraid of another ectopic. At the same time, I desperately want a baby, so of course, part of me is hoping for a bfp.  I'm just sick of the whole ttc process.

    I'm also kind of crazy today because a girl who has the same EDD that I had accidentally posted on ttgp and I got the lovely reminder of exactly how far along I'd be. :(

    Having an identity crisis due to the new Bump 

     

    TTC since July 2012 
    BFP 5/22/13. Lap. to remove ectopic and DX with endo. 6/16

    Blogging to stay sane

    image

  • Veganlady said:
    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.
    I'm sorry about your period showing up and also that your H is backing out of your original plans.

    Having an identity crisis due to the new Bump 

     

    TTC since July 2012 
    BFP 5/22/13. Lap. to remove ectopic and DX with endo. 6/16

    Blogging to stay sane

    image

  • meli1025 said:

    I'm hopppin on!  Good job conductor.

    Crazy level from 1-10:  8

    CD/DPO:  CD17 / 2DPO 

    Can I just __wake up when the 2ww is over____ already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  Nada

    Explain your Crazy here:  So because I am stubborn and don't want to start temping, I keep changing my O date.  I first thought it was CD14 but then I had another positive OPK on CD 15.  DH was too tired 8-| to DTD on CD 15 which really annoyed me.  I did wear him out though I guess on the few days prior to that.  So anyway, I had really bad ovulation cramps the other day so that's why I'm convinced I was O'ing on CD 15.  I'm praying we didn't miss the window and that DTD on CD 13 & 14 did the trick.  DH seems confident, me.....not so much.  We shall see.  I'm just really really really impatient. 

    If you O'd on cd15 your timing is great! Try to stay sane!

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • Veganlady said:

    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.

    I'm so sorry vegan. ((((Hugs)))) It's so hard when you don't see eye to eye. Hopefully he will get on board soon.

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • BethKate said:

    Crazy level from 1-10:  7

    CD/DPO:  24/7 

    Can I just chill out already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  Really sore boobs and crampy. Normal LP symptoms for me.

    Explain your Crazy here:  I'm so torn about what I want from this cycle. I'm scared to death to get pregnant because I'm afraid of another ectopic. At the same time, I desperately want a baby, so of course, part of me is hoping for a bfp.  I'm just sick of the whole ttc process.

    I'm also kind of crazy today because a girl who has the same EDD that I had accidentally posted on ttgp and I got the lovely reminder of exactly how far along I'd be. :(

    I'm sorry you had to see that post. Those reminders are so so hard. ((Hugs)) I think we all know what you mean about feeling conflicted! TTCAL is such a mind fluck

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • Veganlady said:
    BethKate said:
    Veganlady said:
    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.
    I'm sorry about your period showing up and also that your H is backing out of your original plans.
    Thanks. The kicker is that he griped about having to jerk it into a cup. Um, he's not exactly doing the heavy lifting here.
    I'm sorry about the frustration with YH. I don't know what happens to their brains sometimes. Hugs. 
  • I think I best sign in.

    6dpo and I've been thinking I had symptoms starting yesterday. Commit me now, lol.

    I'm sure it's just my feeling pressure bc if this cycle doesn't take I get a hysteroscopy and clomid.

    BFP#2 2.5.11 (EDD 10.15.11) DS born 9.28.11

    BFP#4 8.27.13 (EDD 5.6.14) DD born 4.23.14

     

    Lilypie - (2llN)

    Lilypie - (2L9u)

     

      My Recipe Blog
    ~All AL'ers welcome~

  • BethKate said:
    Veganlady said:
    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.
    I'm sorry about your period showing up and also that your H is backing out of your original plans.

    ((vegan))

    married my best friend 10/04/08, TTC since July 2012
    BFP#1 Thanksgiving 11/22/12, mo-mo twins(one sac), traditional EDD 7/27/13, EDD due to risk 6/15/13
    mmc Angel 2/7/13 @ 15w3d, mmc Aubrey 2/13/13 @ 16w2d, D&E 2/16/13

    BFP#2 9/21/13, EDD 6/2/14, DD born 5/17/14 

    imageimage image

    All AL always welcome in my threads!

  • Veganlady said:
    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.
    ((Hugs))


    After 4 years, 3 failed IUIs and 2 failed IVFs our surprise miracle is here!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    My Blog

    TTC # 2 BFP 03/02/13 = CP, BFP 05/14/13 = CP, BFP 08/09/13 = CP

    RPL testing = normal

    TI Cycle #1, 50 clomid days 3-7, 150 iu Follistim days 8-11 = BFP! EDD May 22, 2014

    Betas: 13 DPO = 79, 15 DPO = 149, 19 DPO = 788, 22 DPO = 2031

  • Crazy level from 1-10:  7

    CD/DPO:  11/N/A 

    Can I just chill out already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  None, I haven't even O'd yet.

    Explain your Crazy here:  I took a HPT last night. I ordered a box of Wondofo's (or however you spell it) off of Amazon and they arrived yesterday. I decided to take one just to see if they worked - at least that's what I told myself. It was negative, obviously, because I haven't even O'd yet, and I was all butt hurt about it. What other outcome was I expecting?!


    After 4 years, 3 failed IUIs and 2 failed IVFs our surprise miracle is here!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    My Blog

    TTC # 2 BFP 03/02/13 = CP, BFP 05/14/13 = CP, BFP 08/09/13 = CP

    RPL testing = normal

    TI Cycle #1, 50 clomid days 3-7, 150 iu Follistim days 8-11 = BFP! EDD May 22, 2014

    Betas: 13 DPO = 79, 15 DPO = 149, 19 DPO = 788, 22 DPO = 2031

  • Crazy level from 1-10: 10++

    CD/DPO: 31/10 DPO

    Can I just ______ already?!: chill out

    Signs/Symptoms: food cravings, break out, cramping, spotting on 5 DPO (which I've never had in my life)

    Explain your Crazy here: I am jumping on the train b/c I am literally crazy today. I had a  breakdown last night, and then dreamt that I got 3 + hpts, so of course I woke up this am and tested, resulting in a BFN.  I am doing horribly today, very anxious, sad and not really feeling any better than I was last night. I know it's still early and I shouldn't of wasted a test when I only have one wondfo left and one FRER. But my stupid mind had to mess with me!  I am thinking of testing again Saturday so I know if I can drink at a party I am going to...hopefully if I am KU something will show up by then. My luteal phase is usually 14 days, but has been as long as 16.


    BFP #1 ended in MMC. Discovered Oct 2005 @10w5d, baby stopped growing around 6w. D&C.
    BFP#2 Nov 2005. Baby's heart stopped @ 8w3d. D&C Jan 2006. Trisomy 18
    BFP#3 Nov 2006. My "miracle baby" DD born 7/25/07
    BFP #4 11/6/12. EDD 7/16/13~my birthday! No sac found @ 5w1d, betas not increasing. Natural m/c started 11/20/12.

    BFP#5 11/9/13.  EDD 7/21/14  Our beautiful rainbow born on his due date!!

  • BethKate said:

    Crazy level from 1-10:  7

    CD/DPO:  24/7 

    Can I just chill out already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  Really sore boobs and crampy. Normal LP symptoms for me.

    Explain your Crazy here:  I'm so torn about what I want from this cycle. I'm scared to death to get pregnant because I'm afraid of another ectopic. At the same time, I desperately want a baby, so of course, part of me is hoping for a bfp.  I'm just sick of the whole ttc process.

    I'm also kind of crazy today because a girl who has the same EDD that I had accidentally posted on ttgp and I got the lovely reminder of exactly how far along I'd be. :(

    I feel the same way right now..just sick of the whole process. And I know there are people who have been here way longer which makes me feel guilty. But I can't help how I feel.  ((hugs))


    BFP #1 ended in MMC. Discovered Oct 2005 @10w5d, baby stopped growing around 6w. D&C.
    BFP#2 Nov 2005. Baby's heart stopped @ 8w3d. D&C Jan 2006. Trisomy 18
    BFP#3 Nov 2006. My "miracle baby" DD born 7/25/07
    BFP #4 11/6/12. EDD 7/16/13~my birthday! No sac found @ 5w1d, betas not increasing. Natural m/c started 11/20/12.

    BFP#5 11/9/13.  EDD 7/21/14  Our beautiful rainbow born on his due date!!

  • I think I best sign in.

    6dpo and I've been thinking I had symptoms starting yesterday. Commit me now, lol.

    I'm sure it's just my feeling pressure bc if this cycle doesn't take I get a hysteroscopy and clomid.

    I hate that feeling of "if it doesn't happen this cycle, then...xyz". And 6dpo is prime obsessing time! When are you planning on testing?

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • Crazy level from 1-10:  8

    CD/DPO: CD12

    Can I just _____ already?!:  Get a positive OPK.

    Signs/Symptoms: CM is starting to look fertile.

    Explain your crazy here:  This is my first month charting, and I don't want to miss anything, so I have been checking CM, checking CP, temping and using OPK's.  At this point, I feel like I am thinking about it all...the...time.  Since I haven't checked CM before, I feel like I am still relying on OPK's to tell me when to BD, especially since I'm not positive that I will recognize when I have O'd and FF won't tell me until 3 days after the fact.  I really don't want to miss the window.
    Chase was born 4/23/2011
    Carlene was born 4/18/2014                          A14 siggy challenge:  Junk Food
    image  image image






  • Crazy level from 1-10:  7

    CD/DPO:  11/N/A 

    Can I just chill out already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  None, I haven't even O'd yet.

    Explain your Crazy here:  I took a HPT last night. I ordered a box of Wondofo's (or however you spell it) off of Amazon and they arrived yesterday. I decided to take one just to see if they worked - at least that's what I told myself. It was negative, obviously, because I haven't even O'd yet, and I was all butt hurt about it. What other outcome was I expecting?!

    Haha, that is pretty crazy! TTCAL makes you do crazy things.

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • Crazy level from 1-10: 10++

    CD/DPO: 31/10 DPO

    Can I just ______ already?!: chill out

    Signs/Symptoms: food cravings, break out, cramping, spotting on 5 DPO (which I've never had in my life)

    Explain your Crazy here: I am jumping on the train b/c I am literally crazy today. I had a  breakdown last night, and then dreamt that I got 3 + hpts, so of course I woke up this am and tested, resulting in a BFN.  I am doing horribly today, very anxious, sad and not really feeling any better than I was last night. I know it's still early and I shouldn't of wasted a test when I only have one wondfo left and one FRER. But my stupid mind had to mess with me!  I am thinking of testing again Saturday so I know if I can drink at a party I am going to...hopefully if I am KU something will show up by then. My luteal phase is usually 14 days, but has been as long as 16.

    ((((Amores)))) so sorry about the bfn. Hopefully it's just too early.

    image

    TTC #1 since Sept 2011
    BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
    BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
    Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
    Blog   ​Chart

  • nyg2042nyg2042 member
    edited July 2013
    Crazy level from 1-10: 6

     CD/DPO: 28/7

     Can I just ______ already?!: be able to POAS

     Signs/Symptoms: cramps, a little bit of blood in my CM this AM, and feeling like I have a bad cold (sore throat, achy, hot flashes)

     Explain your Crazy here:  I'm disappointed in myself because I was so relaxed this 2ww.  Then, today happened.  I'm so confused as I had some spotting today, and I'm scared that I'm going to have a short LP this cycle. I just want it to be next week so I can test and know wth is going on with my body.  I hate feeling like a crazy person!



    image

    BFP #1 : 3/20/13 | EDD: 12/1/13 | MC: 4/15/13 

    BFP #2: 1/9/14 | EDD: 9/21/14  

    Welcomed our rainbow bear on 8/31/14

    My Chart | All are Welcome

  • nyg2042 said:
    Crazy level from 1-10: 6

     CD/DPO: 28/7

     Can I just ______ already?!: be able to POAS

     Signs/Symptoms: cramps, a little bit of blood in my CM this AM, and feeling like I have a bad cold (sore throat, achy, hot flashes)

     Explain your Crazy here:  I'm disappointed in myself because I was so relaxed this 2ww.  Then, today happened.  I'm so confused as I had some spotting today, and I'm scared that I'm going to have a short LP this cycle. I just want it to be next week so I can test and know wth is going on with my body.  I hate feeling like a crazy person!

    Implantation bleeding?  I had it at 7dpo the cycle I conceived. I'm going to be stalking you like crazy.

    I'm doubtful.  I try to be as realistic as possible with things, and I feel that its more likely PMS and spotting.  I didn't spot at all when I got pregnant the last time. Regardless.  I always appreciate stalking!

    8->


    image

    BFP #1 : 3/20/13 | EDD: 12/1/13 | MC: 4/15/13 

    BFP #2: 1/9/14 | EDD: 9/21/14  

    Welcomed our rainbow bear on 8/31/14

    My Chart | All are Welcome

  • nyg2042nyg2042 member
    edited July 2013
    BethKate said:

    Crazy level from 1-10:  7

    CD/DPO:  24/7 

    Can I just chill out already?!:

    Signs/Symptoms:  Really sore boobs and crampy. Normal LP symptoms for me.

    Explain your Crazy here:  I'm so torn about what I want from this cycle. I'm scared to death to get pregnant because I'm afraid of another ectopic. At the same time, I desperately want a baby, so of course, part of me is hoping for a bfp.  I'm just sick of the whole ttc process.

    I'm also kind of crazy today because a girl who has the same EDD that I had accidentally posted on ttgp and I got the lovely reminder of exactly how far along I'd be. :(

    Hugs to you!


    image

    BFP #1 : 3/20/13 | EDD: 12/1/13 | MC: 4/15/13 

    BFP #2: 1/9/14 | EDD: 9/21/14  

    Welcomed our rainbow bear on 8/31/14

    My Chart | All are Welcome

  • Veganlady said:
    Disappointment level - eleventy
    CD2

    I'm disappointed because of AF, obv, but also disappointed because the plan had been to go to the RE this cycle and start IUI. DH balked and wants to give it one more month on our own. I don't see the point (low motility) and think it will be a wasted cycle, the last before my 40th birthday.

    Whatever. I'm not pushing someone into parenthood if they're reluctant.

    Sorry that AF showed and that your H has balked on you. I'm sure it's frustrating. ((Hugs))


    image

    BFP #1 : 3/20/13 | EDD: 12/1/13 | MC: 4/15/13 

    BFP #2: 1/9/14 | EDD: 9/21/14  

    Welcomed our rainbow bear on 8/31/14

    My Chart | All are Welcome

  •  Crazy level from 1-10: 7
     CD/DPO: CD 15
     Can I just ___O!___ already?!: 
     Signs/Symptoms: Explain your Crazy here:  I am on my first real cycle after my first AF after my MC.  Before my first AF, I had a time period with a bunch of EWCM, and O pains, but according to my temperatures no O, some spotting and then AF 4 days later.  Now I'm on my first cycle.  I am CD 15 - and I have always been regular, with EWCM leading up to day 14, then strong O pains.  Here I am on CD 15, with EWCM for the past couple of days, but no O pains and no O confirmed by temps.  I know that cycles can be weird after MC, but getting the EWCM right on time is totally messing with my head.  I'm sad, I'm frustrated, and I hate not knowing what is going to happen.  I recognize that I was one of the few people that always had that elusive, regular cycle that lasted 28 days, but being so used to it, no matter how many times I went on and off of BC, it's totally killing me that my body makes no sense to me now.  I have no idea what's happening.  H has been a stud in terms of our HIOing that past 5 days, and I just feel like I'm letting him down because I have no idea how to make my body ovulate.  :(  I know in terms of the grand scheme of things, this isn't the biggest problem in the world, but it is really making me sad and unsure of myself and my body.

    Thanks for listening!  Sorry I don't have a yummy treat to PIP.

    BabyFruit Ticker

    BFP 3.8.16  EDD 11.20.16

    image

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"