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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
MaggieF516
member
Feeding is a nightmare....
MaggieF516
member
Well my son has always been a difficult baby to say the least. He has not been easygoing in one area his whole life (has to be held constantly, wouldn't BF at first but now won't stop, won't take a bottle or sippy cup, fussy eater, slept awful until 10 mos, etc.). Basically now he doesn't want to eat at all unless he is basically "tricked" into it (i.e. I let him crawl around and play and I follow him around and sneak food into his mouth). He has a hissy fit when I try to put him in the highchair and then won't stop crying. I've started really dreading it so I just decided to feed him outside of his highchair, but this is SO messy. I'm also not sure if I am causing a bad habit by doing this but I don't see an alternative.
He also spits out anything he doesn't want to eat which basically is anything but banana/fruit purees, bread and puffs. He won't even try anything new like pasta, cheese, etc. I really have gotten to the point that I dread feeding him because I know it is going to be so difficult and take forever to get him to eat even the most minimal amount of food. Is anyone else experiencing anything similar or have any tips or suggestions? Thanks in advance!
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Re: Feeding is a nightmare....
Hypothyroid/Fibroids/Stage 4 Endometriosis
10/2010 Open myomectomy to remove 3 fibroids largest @ 8 inches. Stage 4 endometriosis and inoperable/blocked left tube.
3/2011 Laporoscopy/Hysteroscopy. 3 endometrioma cysts, hydrosalpinx, left tube and half of the left ovary removed.
5/2011 IUI #1 medicated w/injections, 1 follie = BFP!
6/2011 Blighted Ovum/ D&C
9/2011 IUI #2 medicated w/injections, 2 follies = BFP!
DS never had a eating issue but refused to drink except first thing in the morning for about 2 weeks. Since he was only taking about 5 or 6 ounces of formula (ate lots of solids), I was very worried and did the same things you did - tried to trick him into drinking, sneak spoons of water into him while he wasn't paying attention, followed him around, crawling on my hands and knees with sippy cups, spoons and syringes. Anyways, when I brought this up with my pediatrician, she told me to just back off - unless a child is sick, he or she will not intentionally starve himself and will drink when he was thirsty. I was very reluctant to back off since I counted his wet diapers and I was convinced that he was getting dehydrated. But drinking became such a stressful event at our house that I would cry to DH almost nightly about how few ounces DS drank, and all the things I was trying etc.
After backing off and just leaving him be, the problem resolved itself. DS still doesn't drink a ton, but he will drink at every meal. So maybe try backing off for a few days and see how it goes.
Have you tried letting him feed himself? Its messy, but maybe sit him in the high chair and give him a food he likes (puffs for example) and then another type that is easy to pick up (like peas or corn). Give him a spoon and let him loose.
DD gave me the worst time until I figured out she wants her own bowl, her own utensils etc. Yes, she did get frustrated as she figured it out and it was a mess. I put a drop cloth under the high chair to catch anything thrown or spilled. She usually got a bath right afterward (because she would get mad and put things in her hair of course). Eventually though she stopped flipping out and started exploring.
I'd also experiment with different textures. You have to keep offering. He may not ever like a food, but the more you offer the more likely he is to try it and eventually to like it.
DD loved brown rice with difference purees first. So she'd try it that way and then I'd gradually introduce the "real" food. Start with the mushy and let him try with a fork or spoon. He may not like touching certain textures.
It will be messy. Give him a chance to just make a mess. It will help make eating interesting.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
You've made it a power struggle. Offer him the same foods you're eating, and include at least one of the foods you already know he likes. Let him have food directly *from* your plate, even. And let him feed himself (with his hands). If he chooses not to eat, ok. If he chooses to, great! He will eat when he gets hungry.* And it will take time (not, like, three days - more like three months) to feel like you make any real change in this sort of thing, but he has to learn that you won't play "food" with him any more.
*If he has food sensitivities, sensory issues, or oral motor skill issues, he may choose not to eat even if he is hungry. The chances that this are the case is low, and it's important to consider these issues. But if you think your son has one of these sorts of issues, you should be treating it.
I don't know if anyone mentioned this but maybe he's not that hungry yet. For example, if he last ate about 1.5 hours ago that push it to 2 hours and see if that makes him hungry enough. Also be careful with the opposite effect. If he's too hungry he'll be harder to deal with. You have to figure out that magic number for it to work. Ditto, letting LO self-feed and offering favorites along with new items. Remember that it can take at least a week for a child to warm up to new food. You just need to continue offering it along with favorites so at least LO is eating something. Sometimes when DS has gobbled up all of his favorite food and wants more I tell him he needs to take a bite of the ignored food before he gets more. I've done this enough times that he's starting to make the connection and will do this.
In the end, like someone pointed out if he's at a healthy weight don't worry too much. You'll learn real quick that kid taste will ebb and flow. They go back and forth with what they like. Just keep offering new foods to continue to open their taste buds but in keep in mind that this should never be a battle. Food, sleep, and potty training are the main things kids know they are able to control out of the many things WE control over them throughout the day. Therefore, they exercise this control with great tenacity.
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