Husband is 40, Issues?

tiaandraj · June 2013

My husband just turned 40 and we are going to start trying right away. Is there anything I should be worried about due to his age? In the last year or so he has lost weight (about 30 lbs) and is generally in good health but he does have Type 2 Diabetes and high cholesteral. He is most likely going to be taken off the high cholesteral meds soon as he's been doing so well with his diet but he will most likely need to stay on the diabetes meds for the long term, though the dosage is quite low now compared to what it was at the begining.

I'm only 25 just as a reference, there is a large age gap between us. Is there anything I should be seriously worried about? He is a non-smoker and VERY occasionally drinks.

tealowl · June 2013

It doesn't sound like there is any problems. How's his sperm, though?

von1976 · June 2013

His age is not an issue as far as I know, and the fact that he's lost some weight, doesn't smoke, and only drinks occasionally is a plus.

I have no idea how having type II diabetes and high cholesterol would affect his fertility, nor the cholesterol-lowering medication he is currently on. His doctor would be the best person to ask about those things.

EmeJay · June 2013

Does he have children from previous relationships? (It's always a question a doctor will ask)

I'm not familiar with Type 2 diabetes and TTC though.

He should talk to his doctor if he his concerned about this, but nothing prevent you to at least start trying and see what will happen from there.

GL.

tiaandraj · June 2013

He has no previous children no, but he never wanted to have any.

I was thinking of asking him to get his swimmers checked out, but didn't want to damage his ego, men are silly that way sometimes.

I think I've just been doing to much reading. I keep coming across articles that mention men over 35 have a way higher risk of producing a child with genetic defects and such so I'm worried a bit about that.

tealowl · June 2013

He should call his doc and have a physical done and talk to him about wanting to have a child. That would be my first start.

Good luck!

kali55 · June 2013

Slapalicious:
tiaandraj:

He has no previous children no, but he never wanted to have any.

I was thinking of asking him to get his swimmers checked out, but didn't want to damage his ego, men are silly that way sometimes.

I think I've just been doing to much reading. I keep coming across articles that mention men over 35 have a way higher risk of producing a child with genetic defects and such so I'm worried a bit about that.

Everything I read was somewhere around 45 for APA, not 35... 35 is the AMA.

Don't borrow trouble. Start trying and if you're unable to get KU'd in a year, then start looking into testing.

Yes

I know of some men who are having babies at 50+ years old

tiaandraj · June 2013

I will get him to go and get checked out.

Do you guys think we should wait until then? His father has his younger brother when he was older too, I believe he was 44/45 and his mom was 39 at the time, he turned out pretty good LOL!

I'd say the chances of us conceiving right away are pretty slim anyways.

beckynsean11 · June 2013

Slapalicious:
tiaandraj:
He has no previous children no, but he never wanted to have any.
I was thinking of asking him to get his swimmers checked out, but didn't want to damage his ego, men are silly that way sometimes.
I think I've just been doing to much reading. I keep coming across articles that mention men over 35 have a way higher risk of producing a child with genetic defects and such so I'm worried a bit about that.
Everything I read was somewhere around 45 for APA, not 35... 35 is the AMA.
Don't borrow trouble. Start trying and if you're unable to get KU'd in a year, then start looking into testing.

Yes His age should not be an issue. 35 is the magic number for women. I wouldn't stress about it right now. Try to have some fun with this before you bring the added stress of testing, trust me it sucks & yes it fvucks with your guy's head.

herecomesthesun · June 2013

I wouldn't do any testing until reaching the 1 year TTC mark.

curlylocks3 · June 2013

None of that should be a problem. My husband is on cholesterol meds and probably will be forever because dietary changes alone can't get his numbers down and his SAs have always been great.
If you guys are due for your yearly physicals soon it wouldn't be a bad thing to get them done now so you know if there is anything you need to be working on but if not NBD.

TUSBride22 · June 2013

CLECyclist:
You're assuming because he's 40 he's going to have issues? You know that wrinkly old men in their 90s have gotten women pregnant, right?

This exactly. I was 27 and DH was 40 when we had DS. We got pregnant on the first try. I was charting for months prior and we got lucky, we weren't expecting it to happen that fast. You want to get him tested why exactly? I would wait until you've at least been TTC For a while. Why risk bruising his ego over nothing? Besides, it may end up that something in your biology, not his, will cause you problems TTC. Don't go looking for trouble when you have barely started. Relax.

PS... Our beautiful, perfectly healthy 3 year old DS is in my siggy. Now DH is 42 and we're trying for another.

tiaandraj · June 2013

It wasn't that I THOUGHT there would be issues. Honestly I wasn't worried about it at all until I started seeing/reading all these silly articles about sperm quality decreasing and then I started to get all worried. It was more a question of "Has anyone else had issues, or are there specific things I should be concerned about".

I was in no way attacking him or anything of that sort, I would NEVER EVER want him to feel that way at all. He has been very patient with me, he's wanted a baby for over a year now and I just wasn't ready. He goes for checkups for his diabetes every 3 months and has one next month, I mentioned to him just to let the DOC know that we were trying and just ask about his specific meds, that's alright isn't it? Ugh, now I feel terrible.

I really do not want to come off that way to you girls.

tiaandraj · June 2013

I guess I need to do some research but what does this mean?

"YH is not APA"

.

TUSBride22 · June 2013

tiaandraj:
It wasn't that I THOUGHT there would be issues. Honestly I wasn't worried about it at all until I started seeing/reading all these silly articles about sperm quality decreasing and then I started to get all worried. It was more a question of "Has anyone else had issues, or are there specific things I should be concerned about". I was in no way attacking him or anything of that sort, I would NEVER EVER want him to feel that way at all. He has been very patient with me, he's wanted a baby for over a year now and I just wasn't ready. He goes for checkups for his diabetes every 3 months and has one next month, I mentioned to him just to let the DOC know that we were trying and just ask about his specific meds, that's alright isn't it? Ugh, now I feel terrible. I really do not want to come off that way to you girls.

That's different. In your original post and one thereafter, it sounded like you were ready to take him to the dr to have him checked today. I understand your concern, we all want to make the situation as perfect as possible for TTC, but the truth is, we don't have control. Let me repeat; we don't have control. Step away from Google, and just try to enjoy the process. If, in a year, you are having issues, THEN worry about seeing a dr. Don't feel terrible, sometimes worries get the best of us all.

dragonfly711 · June 2013

Hello. I am 39 and hubby is 41. We started ttc back in dec. we did get pregnant first try just to MC in Feb.

Our Dr told us to keep ttc for 6 months then if nothing to come back for a work up. If under 35 then a year if over 6 months.

Hubby also had a physical the day before we found out we were pregnant in Dec. he talked to the Dr and all he did was check his testosterone level. Found out next day we were pregnant a few days later found out he has low T. He talked to Dr since the mC and she does not want to start him on anything if we are ttc again since it can decrease fertility.

I would say ttc seriously for 6 months If nothing after 6 months talk to your Dr.

To add hubby also has a nephew that has Down's syndrome who is in is late 20s and I have a cousin that has Autism. Dr said they would do genetic testing once I was pregnant I think sprung week 14 or so to. Check for things. Other than that nothing you can do but go for it!!!

tealowl · June 2013

S/O has varicocele, and was told when he was younger that he would probably be infertile (this is what he remembers Dr. Debbie Downer telling him). I was concerned at first and wanted him to get checked out and tests done, but decided we should TTC for at least 6 months or longer before paying for possibly unneccesary tests. We got pg on the first cycle which sadly has ended, but I was charting AF w/FF for at least a year prior using it as TTA, so I had an idea of what my cycles were. Now we know for free that there doesn't seem to be an issue on his end.

dragonfly711 · June 2013

Slapalicious:
hlmlvt:
Hello. I am 39 and hubby is 41. We started ttc back in dec. we did get pregnant first try just to MC in Feb.

Our Dr told us to keep ttc for 6 months then if nothing to come back for a work up. If under 35 then a year if over 6 months.

Hubby also had a physical the day before we found out we were pregnant in Dec. he talked to the Dr and all he did was check his testosterone level. Found out next day we were pregnant a few days later found out he has low T. He talked to Dr since the mC and she does not want to start him on anything if we are ttc again since it can decrease fertility.

I would say ttc seriously for 6 months If nothing after 6 months talk to your Dr.

To add hubby also has a nephew that has Down's syndrome who is in is late 20s and I have a cousin that has Autism. Dr said they would do genetic testing once I was pregnant I think sprung week 14 or so to. Check for things. Other than that nothing you can do but go for it!!!
Clarification for everyone:  Six months only if the woman is over 35.  Not the man.  The OP is only 25.  When you see the doctor is based on maternal age.  So you're contradicting yourself.  (Or maybe you don't know that)  OP, TTCing can take a year, you're not of AMA, so you don't need to start worrying about low ovarian reserve or decreased egg quality.   hlmlvt, you are of AMA.  That's why your doctor told you six months.
I don't see how any of this relates to the OP, hlmlvt.  The risk of Down's is increased with AMA.  The OP is not of AMA.  The risk of Autism *might* be increased with men over the age of 45.  Neither of those cases relate to the OP.
Are you trying to scare someone who hasn't even really started trying yet?

I did not know AMA is just for the woman. I did say that if under 35 than a year and over 35 6 months. I thought that AMA was for both so figured since one is over and one is under 6 months would be safe than talk to a Dr.
I am not a Dr so I don't know everything. Just giving my experience since my hubby is older.

dragonfly711 · June 2013

tiaandraj:
I will get him to go and get checked out. Do you guys think we should wait until then? His father has his younger brother when he was older too, I believe he was 44/45 and his mom was 39 at the time, he turned out pretty good LOL! I'd say the chances of us conceiving right away are pretty slim anyways.

Just have fun see how it goes. Enjoy trying. Then when it is time for him to go to the Dr you can chat then. Might as well try and have fun and see what happens.

MsQuezada · June 2013

hlmlvt:
I did not know AMA is just for the woman. I did say that if under 35 than a year and over 35 6 months. I thought that AMA was for both so figured since one is over and one is under 6 months would be safe than talk to a Dr. I am not a Dr so I don't know everything. Just giving my experience since my hubby is older.

AMA = Advanced Maternal Age. This would only apply to the mother, however this does not apply to OP because she is not of AMA. That advice was given to you because you are of AMA.

The OP situation is very different from your experience.

CLECyclist:

hlmlvt:
I did not know AMA is just for the woman.

If you don't know, don't say anything, please.

Yes

No need to scare someone when clearly it does not apply to her.

tiaandraj · June 2013

Thanks for all the great replies everyone! I think I just jumped the gun, Dr. Google is terrible. You end up thinking you have the worst thing when everything is probably fine!

Thanks again guys!

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