Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: ~FFFC~
I'm usually a hermit.
This was totally my thought when you were asked what people think of the pole when they come over - "She has people over? People do that?"
And I _like_ socializing as long as it doesn't involve the phone. I hate the phone.
Well, "lack of word" sounded odd. :-)
wow! way to go!!!
Me too, which is horrible because I've always been fairly anti-social. It takes a lot for me to get close to other people, and since I'm determined to be home by LO's bedtime every night it doesn't leave much time to do that. I also live in a college town, so many of the gfs I've made over the years move on within a couple years. It's just so much work to make more friends, and I'm worried that this is going to rub off on Charlie or affect her in some way.
Even a minor event in the life of a child is an event of that child's world and thus a world event.
Married: 5/21/05 **~** Emery Aylin 6/30/12
BFP#1-11/5/10- Surgery for ectopic pregnancy 11/15/10 BFP#2-11/1/11 Due 7/8/12 Born 6/30/12
Oops we did it again... BFP 03/23/14 Due 12/6/14 Nora Born 11/23/14
She is beautiful! And a pretty facking fantastic person to boot!
What just happened in my diaper?!
You are the very best friend a girl could ever ask for. Thank you for being my self esteem fairy today! I needed it.
Thanks MM and cwm for the support! It turns out I'm so much more self critical post weightloss than I was before.
You are fabulous ladies and I would totes be friends with you and do fun shizz. Are there meetup groups in your area [like a dating website for friends but not creepy like online dating can be] ? That's how I made most of my new mom friends.
As a WM, I wouldn't flame you for this. At work I complain (not loudly lol) about missing my kid, but the truth is, the escape is kind of nice. I could see how you could start to feel a little burned out being home day after day.
Neither my oven nor my coffee maker would ever get cleaned if it weren't for my MIL. She's here on Sundays watching Taylor and does the chores no one else wants to do while Taylor naps. She's a sweet lady and loves to help out, so we let her. Last Sunday morning before work, there were a few dishes in the sink and an almost-full dishwasher. Even though I was in a hurry, I quickly loaded and started it because I knew MIL would empty it later.
Also, my mom does all of Taylor's laundry. I haven't done any of it since she was like 4 months old.
And I've got a donut and a pint in my purse with your name on it
What part of MN do you live in? My brother lives there in one of the Minneapolis suburbs and we make it up every now and then.
Even a minor event in the life of a child is an event of that child's world and thus a world event.
i was just about to write pretty much this exact same thing, amilyn. A lot of my H's friends' wives think I'm stuck up, but it's because a lot of times I'm just intimidated and I have a hard time opening up to new people.
that is amazing!! Awesome job, I'm sure you look fantastic! Do you have any tips for losing that amount of weight? My BFF just had a baby, and she is trying to lose 100 lbs.
I will be making the same thing as part of the wedding favors for my best friends wedding! I think it is a sweet gift to his teachers considering most parents probably don't get them anything! I would have been ecstatic to get that when I worked in the daycare!
Thank you! My final goal is actually 100 pounds too. It's hard to say what has really worked this time as H and I have been trying to lose weight the entire time we've been together. Somehow it just finally clicked this time and he also lost 40 pounds. If nothing else, having a partner in crime is amazing. We shop healthy, cook healthy [this mostly means filling and low calorie to me, a lot of what I eat is still considered junk to others], and now that we are broke we hate spending money on junk that's just going to undo all of our work. If you don't have junk in the house then the worst you can do during a moment of weakness is eat a bunch of grapes or something equally unrewarding to binge on. I use myfitnesspal to keep my calories in check and am ocd about filling it in everyday [anyone can add me lkv1986!]. I do have "off days" here and there but once ladies night or the birthday is over I get right back on the wagon. Before it would take me weeks to get back into it. I wish your friend the best of luck! It can feel impossibly daunting to imagine losing 100 pounds but it's totally doable.
You have my full permission to steal it! It was the haircut I had in college and in my 8th month of pregnancy I took an old picture of myself to the salon and had them copy it. Yup, I brought a picture of myself as my haircut inspiration. It's impossibly easy - 10 minutes of blowdrying and that's it!
That would be amazing! Even more incentive to visit as soon as possible. Thanks ladies!
Even a minor event in the life of a child is an event of that child's world and thus a world event.
My 11 month old is out mud riding with his dad on the 4 wheeler. Having a blast. You think he drove a car well, you should see him drive a atv!
Ok - you better stop by my house soon to hang with R and I. I just noticed the kiddie pool opened in our neighborhood, so I think Riley #1 and Riley #2 need a swim date! I'll email you my address, and we will plan it out!! Take a day off work - you deserve it!
Ok - you better stop by my house soon to hang with R and I. I just noticed the kiddie pool opened in our neighborhood, so I think Riley #1 and Riley #2 need a swim date! I'll email you my address, and we will plan it out!! Take a day off work - you deserve it!