BM is worthless, I'm a mess. Long...

stephcarter · June 2013

Well last week I went on 2 rants about BM calling about SD way after her pick up time Monday, then bailing last min tues. Well wed DH and BM talked about BM picking SD up Friday for one of the 2 overnights a month she gets her, rather than Sat since SD had soccer camp Sunday.

Well I left SD signed up for after school care just in case and I'm happy I did. DH had phone call from an unknown number and luckily called it back when he left work. it ended up being SDs BFFs dad who told us SD was still at the school when he picked up his DD and she went to after school care.

I called and sure enough she was still there. DH called BM and told her he got a call from the school. She didnt even have a real excuse. She completely forgot. "I didn't realize it was Friday already!" Come on.

It gets worse.

I had a function last night and got home around midnight. It's extremely rare I go out. By 2, SD was up crying and in a lot of pain. At 4:30 DH took her to the ER. They think its her appendix, still not sure. They ended up transferring her to CHOP around noon and my sister came over to watch Bailey so I could meet them there. BM never even came to the hospital. They tried to tell me they wouldn't give me a bracelet because its 2 per child and they wanted BM to have it in case she decided she might show up. Ummm. I'm the one running on 2 hrs sleep. I'm the one sitting here for hours and I've got an 8 month old at home and a job! I'm the one who hasn't eaten all day because SD can't eat and I felt terrible about it. I'M THE ONE WHO IS HERE! when we got the new nurse DH told them no chance of BM showing and to give me the bracelet which they did.

Makes me hate BM even more. She said she couldn't get a ride. Really? The train drops off right in front of the hospital. Take a bus, take a cab! Your kid is sick, you get there!

I deserve this bracelet. Not her. SD didnt even ask for her but was totally bummed I had to leave for the night. She knows. It's sad.

Sorry this is so long. I'm a mess.

dannie2011 · June 2013

I'm so sorry about your SD. I hope she gets better soon.

My daughter had her appendix burst and went in for emergency surgery, her father couldn't be bothered to come to the hospital either. He had similar excuses.

twister22 · June 2013

I'm sorry, T&Ps for your SD. BM sounds like a piece of work. I can't believe the nurse wouldn't give you the bracelet, that's BS. When DS had stitches it was the same rule that only 2 people could be with the child, but they let us switch people, we just slipped off the bracelet.

SD is lucky to have you.

xmaryrickx · June 2013

Poor kid. Hope she feels better soon and you can catch up on some sleep.

Pamelacake · June 2013

=( Your BM sounds more like ours every time I see a post! When my SD's were taken to the ER she just denied the fact that there was anything wrong with them. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that.. Glad you finally got the bracelet! I hope you and SD are feeling better soon!

Lavender P · June 2013

I'm so sorry. That is awful. I hope your SD is okay. She and your DH are lucky to have you.

stephcarter · June 2013

Thanks everyone. I never expected her to get there, and part of me didn't even want her there. I just don't understand how a parent could not be there though. She kind of has a job, but its cleaning the church once in a while, so its not like she had to "work" last night. She collects social security, don't even get me started on that mess, and has enough money to take the bus to the mall to buy herself new clothes, but used the "i cant find a ride" excuse to not show up yesterday.

It looks like they're going to take her appendix out today. Her bloodwork is showing as normal, but the pain is still in the same exact spot. They'll look around while they're in there to see if its something else, but there really isn't much else it could be.

Pamelacake · June 2013

Extra T's and P's for your SD and your family today! I fully agree with PP that said they are lucky to have you!

Sounds an awful lot like our BM. Always has money and time for the bar and drugs but nothing for SD's unless there is a court date coming up and she wants to make herself look good. BM even skipped her mother's day weekend for the bar. Ugh.. makes me sick!

stephcarter · June 2013

Thanks. She hasn't even called yet today.

karatechrissy · June 2013

I want to know how parents like this exist. I mean, really. Mom's, Dad's... when you are a parent your children take precedence over everything else. EVERYTHING! I'm glad you are there for your SD. I know it can be frustrating in your case with the bracelet, but you do have to remember the hospital wasn't trying to 'stick it to ya', they were just doing what their policies told them to do. I get it, I get how you feel, but the hospital doesn't have a manual for 'effed up blended families'. kwim?

Pamelacake · June 2013

I fully agree with the last two posters. I was just looking for an update on SD. I can't believe she didn't even call the day she was to have surgery! I didn't think there was anyone out there like our BM. You totally proven that there is! I'm so glad that she is with you!!

Alohalove · June 2013

I hope your SD is better. How awful for her! Her birth mother is useless.

I know this is so sexist, but I can't understand mothers who are useless for their children. Mothers! We carried our babies in us! We felt them move and flutter. I'll never understand those worthless mothers.

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