Toddlers: 24 Months+
Evil child at bedtime
My 3 yr old is the sweetest girl all the way up until bedtime. Our daytime tantrums have lessened. But come bedtime she is EVIL. Trying to run from her room. Biting me, hitting me, scratching me. And sometime laughing...It's become a game. I would leave her but then she pushes down the gate on her door and heads for the stairs...which scares me.
Any suggestions? anyone else's kid change at bedtime?
TY!
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Re: Evil child at bedtime
Its not that she is near the stairs - it's that I won't get her back upstairs...And she has fallen down them a few times
I'm sorry, I know it's not funny for you, but this cracked me up. We have a bedtime battle as well, but it's improved a lot. Earlier bedtime coupled with a strict set routine has helped us. We did the "Sleep Lady Shuffle" for awhile also. When it all fails, we also have a babygate. Maybe get a walk-through gate that screws to the wall?
I could have written this, almost word for word. Mine isn't sweet the whole day long, we have the same battle for naptime! Our battle usually only ends when she is crying over getting things taken away, getting punished for the hitting/kicking/scratching or something else 'dramatic.' My daughter reserves most of this for me - she resists my husband, but not with as much physical fight. Lately, we have been using a door lock (it's called like a rabbit lock or something, where the door can't move, but it's open about 2 inches). She continuously gets out of bed and I put her back in (which is what she wants, so that she can fight me). Tonight I locked her door and told her to get into bed and lay down and I would come back in. It took a while, and I had to repeat myself quite a bit, but eventually she did get into bed and stayed there long enough for me to go in. I have taught her to do deep relaxing breaths, so when she can get to a place to do that, we're usually done with the battle. Sometimes when I go back in to get her back into bed, I don't speak to her ("I'm going to be quiet now so you can rest" and then no more talking). Since I can't speak to her, I can't get upset (which is what she wants) and it takes away any reinforcement for her behavior.
I do think she just doesn't want to sleep, because she wants to stay with us, play, etc. I guess a little separation problem. Maybe that's why the door lock is helping a bit - the lock means I'm not there for any reason, positive or negative. We also say a lot a prayers, asking for help to feel safe, to not be scared, to have good dreams, etc. She has a DreamLight and I found a plush angel to help remind her that Jesus and his angels are protecting her at night if she gets scared.
2 days ago I wrote up a sleep/rest time process and 'rest time rules' chart along with a sticker chart (with 'prizes' along the way), but she hasn't earned a sticker yet.
I don't know if any of that will really seem helpful. But I'd love to see what recommendations come to your question. I really feel sad and helpless, wishing that the times that send her off to sleep aren't the most distressing and awful parts of her (and my) day.