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October 2013 Moms
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getting over the guilt sorry long post

laurenmdrn16laurenmdrn16 member
in October 2013 Moms
So I have been overweight or obese my entire life. After I had gotten married I started back on some unhealthy habits and when I went in for my annual physical, my MD said that not only was I obese, but prehypertensive and prediabetic. As a nurse, I already knew all this...I was just in denial.

I hate to admit, but one of the first reactions I had to the positive pregnancy result was guilt. Again, I should've known better that being pregnant like this puts my baby at risk for all sorts of medical issues. Finally, it wasn't just my life or health on the line. In order to be the best mom, I needed to get and stay healthy.

The first few months were filled with m/s, so I wasn't taking in a lot of calories. I took vitamins religiously and made sure that whatever foods I did keep down were healthy. I actually ate kale chips when I wanted potato chips and plain yogurt with fruit when I wanted ice cream. As a chronic "fat kid" it was so weird not throwing my hands up and just pigging out.

Then, the moment of truth. I went in for my third OB appt after the lovely glucola challenge and blood work. My midwife had me get on the scale and announced, 'You have lost about 10lbs". I had a little party inside. I hadn't been below 250 in a long time and here I was, losing weight and getting healthy. She then checked out the results from the Glucose challenge. I was so nervous! She said "Wow, 86! That is fantastic!" I had tested my own blood sugar at work to calibrate the machines and I had never had that healthy a reading. She took my BP. 110/70! At that, I nearly fell off the bench. You have got to be kidding me! She retook it on the other arm because neither of us could believe it. Nope, that was real! Then, for the iron. I had stopped taking the prenatals with iron because of the m/s. And still, my iron levels were so good, I was declared the least anemic preggo my midwife has ever seen!

I also just went to get maternity jeans and immediately took a size 22 into the dressing room. They were huge! So I grabbed a 20...then an 18...still too baggy. Finally a 16, which I hadn't worn since I was 16. Perfect! I feel so great.

Best of all, baby is healthy. And I did that. No matter what happens, I will always know that I did everything to give baby the best start in life. I can be healthy and I can stop the cycle with my LO so he/she will never have to be the chronic fat kid. Guilt gone!

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