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Pregnant after 35
danuli8
member
Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
PG>35 Weekly Check-In: Harsh Realities Edition
danuli8
member
[Mobile: PG>35 Weekly Check-In: Harsh Realities Edition]
WARNING: If you are feeling particularly sensitive or anxious about your pregnancy right now, you might want to skip the second and third paragraphs of my intro. I am fine, but I talk about someone who is not.
Hello, ladies. As I write this, I can feel my baby thumping around in my tummy, and it never fails to make me smile and put a quick hand on my bump. After my great u/s on Friday I had a definite strut in my step. My doula came over for our second prenatal meeting yesterday and we practiced my Hypnobabies stuff during some pretend contractions in a variety of positions. It was the first time I have had to "switch off" in front of an audience, but I was pleasantly surprised by how well I was able to relax. (Of course, there weren't any actual contractions going on, but still...) I can also lean completely on my DH while standing and he has no problem holding me up for 60-90 seconds. (All his running and weight training is really paying off!) We found several very comfortable positions where I can go totally limp and let my DH bear all my weight. It was great practice and a good confidence-builder.
The doula left and I went to prenatal yoga feeling great. After class, the instructor asked me and a few other people to stay after so she could talk to us. Once everyone else had left and we were all seated, she said without preamble, "Martina [I am using a different name to protect her identity] lost her baby during childbirth." Martina was two weeks ahead of me, was at two La Leche League meetings with me, and has been in yoga class with me for the last 4-5 months. It was her first, a boy, and she was planning a homebirth and was very excited about it. She was maybe 28 to 30, so not AMA, and reported just as eagerly as everyone else about her checkups and milestones. Her pregnancy gave every indication of being normal. Needless to say, we were all stunned and shocked into silence. One of Martina's friends, also pregnant and a regular class member, stopped in before class but didn't stay (we had all wondered why) to bring the news and a card that she wanted us to sign. We passed around the card and cried for her. What do you say to a woman who joyfully carried her baby for 38+ weeks and then lost him while giving birth to him? What kind of words can you possibly offer someone who has suffered a tragedy that enormous? What agony must she feel, looking at her nursery things and her empty crib?
I cried all the way home and sobbed all over my husband for a while once I got there. I don't know Martina well and there is probably nothing else I can do for her, but the news is so shocking and so unexpected that it is hard to let go of. And it certainly puts my bitching about CYA medicine in a whole new (rather petty) light. I think I will tone down the strutting and tone up the gratitude for having a healthy baby and caregivers who are keeping an eye on things. I have no details, so I don't know if the outcome would have been any different regardless of the setting (and I also don't know if she actually did give birth at home, either--she may well have ended up at a hospital after all). Sometimes bad things just happen. But when you are that person who puts the 1 in the "1 in XXX" statistic, that is cruel comfort indeed.
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Hi Ladies!
Welcome to the Pregnant after 35 Weekly Check-In!
If you would like to be added to the check-in, just reply to this post with (and answer the questions!):
your screen name
first name (optional)
due date
sex of baby (if known, or will it be a surprise?)
**If you?re already on the list, you don?t need to give this info again**
Please let me know if you have any updates and/or edits that need to be made. Also, if I missed any births please let me know so we can celebrate with you!
Congratulations to the February/March Moms! MangomamaFL gave birth to a baby boy on 2/5/2013 at 10:32pm. He weighed 9lb and was 21in long. Gundy21 gave birth to Maximilian Gunder aka Max at 8:57am on 2/20/13. He weighed 8 lb 9 oz and was 21.25 inches long. Elocin gave birth to a baby girl, Charlotte, on 3/1/13.
Pregnant Moms by Due Date:
March 2013
Beforesunrise (Ashley) 3/1/2013 ? Boy!
rosesarepink (Rose) 3/4/2013 ? Girl!
uctracy@yahoo.com (Tracy) 3/7/2013
CountryGirlInTheCity 3/8/2013 ? Girl!
KatieKnitsny (Katie) 3/14/2013
NBBride05 3/15/2013 ? Girl!
KKGgirlATL 3/18/13 (scheduled c/s) Team Green
Cktravel 3/19/2013 ? Green
Wildflower75 (Martha) 3/20/2013 ? Team Green
MT-Head 3/22/2013 ? Boy!
Redcatz (Kirsten) 3/25/2013 ? Girl!
Dbadura01 (Deanna) 3/26/2013 ? Girl!
Haribo 3/26/2013
Coquina (Melissa) 3/30/2013
MouserNY (Monica) 3/30/2013 ? Boy!
Indyrowergirl 3/31/2013 ? Boy!
April 2013
Angelnumber8 (Angela) 4/04/2013
Lovelyday39 4/05/2013 ? Boy!
Elizabethnseanny (Elizabeth) 4/05/2013 - Boy!
Mishmax11 (Michelle) 4/7/2013
Danuli8 (Amanda) 4/7/2013 ? Boy!
Carol*Brady (Christine) 4/8/2013
Tcfreedom (Tiffany) 4/15/2013
Lilblt19 4/15/2013 ? Girl!
Hisbabygirl76 (Stephanie) 4/16/2013
Shellbear+ (Michelle) 4/23/2013 ? Girl!
Palamar (Chantel) 4/24/2013
Sheloveslan (Mariah) 4/27/2013
Dresch25 (Vicki) 4/29/2013 ? Team Green
Technigirl (Melissa) 4/29/2013
Ba23Ba02 (Barb) 4/29/2013 ? Team Green
Michele707 (Michele) 4/30/2013
May 2013
Dhreczuck 5/2/2013 ? Boy!
Jennyandjasonsbaby (Jenny) 5/5/2013
Trevinosnm (Martha) 5/7/2013 ? Boy!
TXBride (Ami) 5/12/2013
Mndyhywrd (Mindy) 5/15/2013
MotherMayEye (Amy) 5/15/2013 - Girl!
mlwinkle (Michelle) 5/17/2013
McRib 5/18/2013
Drhibbard (MC) 5/19/2013
Petrastonegirl (Petra) 5/19/2013
MrsNukem 5/20/2013 ? TWINS!!
jteneback 5/21/2013 ? Team Green
riorisa 5/22/2013
Rebaann (Rebecca) 5/23/2013 ? Girl!
Danafromslope 5/30/2013 ? TWINS!!
June 2013
Danieleandwayne (Dani?le) 6/4/2013 ? Team Green
1Lump (Andrea) 6/5/2013 ? Team Green
JilliansMoma 6/6/2013 ? Team Green
Daphallen (Daphne) 6/10/2013 ? Boy!
Ocho2002 6/13/2013
VisciousKnitter (Sandy) 6/15/2013
Trootie2012 (Trootie) 6/16/2013
AZAmy77 (Amy) 6/17/2013 ? Boy!
Kimmy42 (Kim) 6/18/2013 ? Girl!
Bubbleleeboo (Lisa) 6/21/2013 ? TWIN BOYS!
July 2013
Beach72 (Kim) 7/2/13
Karen0477 (Karen) 7/3/13
Amypep (Amy) 7/5/2013
Superzuber (Sarah) 7/9/2013
Hlhinden (Heather) 7/13/2013 ? Girl!
Bethz13 7/15/2013 ? Team Green
ASL71476 (Andrea) 7/17/2013
emikat (Christine) 7/21/2013 ? Boy!
Abeille 7/28/2013 ? Boy!
missymr (Mia) 7/29/2013 ? Boy!
honeyforlunch 7/31/2013
August 2013
SeaConquest (Monique) 8/1/2013 ? Boy!
Lucyspeople (Betsy) 8/8/2013 ? Boy!
Lilmrslay (Rachael) 8/9/2013
Jkzinck (Jessie) 8/10/2013
Goatgirlnyc 8/11/2013
AmyM72 (Amy) 8/22/2013
Bunnyfer (Sherri) 8/22/2013
Cali3674 (Cali) 8/25/2013 ? Team Green
Gscoville (Geneva) 8/29/2013 ? Team Green
Kestock120 (Kelly) ? 8/30/2013 ? Boy!
September 2013
Juicy71 (Dawn) 9/4/2013 ? Girl!
Kakhmama (Amy) 9/7/2013
Jerseymm09 (Sonia) 9/9/2013
Atlmommy (Tammy) 9/11/2013
Csh96 (Carla) 9/16/2013
Rubygirl 9/16/2013
October 2013
Stepharonius (Stephanie) 10/10/13
Snapdragon 10/17/2013 ? TWINS!!
Alicialgb (Alicia) 10/24/2013
November 2013
Suchatreat (Michelle) 11/1/2013
Nseeley (Nic) 11/2/2013
GracieBlue 11/3/2013
Hologram87 (Amy) 11/14/2013
QOTW: What do you do when the ?worry monster? shows up? How do you keep a positive focus on your pregnancy while not ignoring the realities of your individual health status and history?
Share your updates and vents:
Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: PG>35 Weekly Check-In: Harsh Realities Edition
I am so sorry to hear that happened, how terrible
We all know there are risks associated, esp at our AMA, when going into this, we just hope that never happens to us or that we'll be the "one."
And I hear you about the CYA medicine- I try real
I am so sorry to hear about your friend. It is so random, unpredictable, and unfair when things like this happen.
A good friend of mine was recently diagnosed with cancer. She runs half-marathons and started having pain in her h
DD born 12.21.09, conceived w/ injects and IUI
TTC#2 since Nov 2011
BFP 2.6.12 m/c 6w5d | BFP 5.25.12 c/p
-Back to the RE-
3 medicated IUIs, all BFN
-Taking a break from treatment-
BFP 11.20.12 ~ EDD 7.28.13
My Chart
Wow, that is terrible. I'm so sorry about your friend and her baby.
It doesn't sound like she had any real risk factors at all and it was probably just a freak thing. I do think that in modern times we have forgotten that chi
I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. This sounds trite, but it really drives home how precious life is for us all.
Please add me to the list. Due date is 07/16/2013, and we're having a boy.
As for how I cop
I am so sorry to hear about your friend!! It's terrible!
My updates:
1. I have a shower on Thursday, still don't know what to wear.
2. We are renovating a house, I can't wait for it to finish, to start setting up the nursery.</
So sorry to hear about your friend. That is the most unimaginable nightmare. I won't feel safe until my babies are out and in my arms, but I know even then something may go wrong.
Update: 3
Me:40 AMA, DH:36 0% morph, TTC#1;
BFP#1 4/2011, MMC 6/2011 11wks Trisomy 13;
BFP#2 11/2011, CP
FSH: 17.9, AMH: 2.2
IVF#1 w/ICSI: ER 4/3: 5R,4M,4F
ET 4/6 All 4 (1-8A+, 2-8A-, 1-3A) BFP#3
Two weeks of beta hell = Blighted Ovum
IVF#2 Aug/Sept: ER 8/27: 4R,3M,3F
ET 8/30 (1-8A+, 1-6A+)
Beta#1 9/10: 350; Beta#2 9/12: 796; Beta#3 9/20: 9155
Expecting Boy/Girl Twins! My babies were born 4/23/13 at 36w1d!
I read this post this morning before I left for my second ultrasound. Oh, my heart broke for Martina, how absolutely awful to experience that. I am reminded to celebrate and not take ONE day for granted because I know the complications that
I am so very sorry to hear about your friend. Such a devastating loss for her and her family. My T&P go out to them.
QOTW: The worry monster has his own bedroom at our place. Since losing our first, he is ever-present.
me:40; DH:41; 4/30/12 1st visit with RE; 6/30/12 IUI #1 BFN; 7/19/12 IUI cancelled (overmedicated); 8/2/12 IUI cancelled (cyst); 9/1/12 IUI #2 BFP! EDD 5/28/13; 10/9/12 1st U/S at 7w3d--missed m/c (trisomy 16) D&C 10/19/12; karyotyping results normal!; 1/31/13 IUI #3 BFP! EDD 10/25/13
QOTW: I'm
That's so horribly tragic, T&P to your friend.
QOTW: Well I think it's obvious by the fact DH and I don't have our nursery anywhere near complete that we haven 't figured out how to deal with the worry that well. After our losses we've both
Me 41 DH 46 Not actively ttc, surprise BFP on 1/6/11! 4/1/11 m/c our sunshine at 16wks after complications from CVS test. TTC #2 **5th cycle 12/6/11 BFP! Missed m/c at 9 weeks 1/21/12, trisomy 14. Two Chemical PG 3/12&7/12
** BFP 8/16/12 beta #1 148! beta#2 407 beta #3 4000 u/s 9.10 1 lovely hb 126, Baby Boy is due 04/28/13!!
Sorry about your friend. A co-worker's wife was due with her first baby about 2 or 3 weeks after I was due with mine, and when I got back from maternity leave, I asked him about their new baby and he told me that the baby didn't make it.&nbs
QOTW: What do you do when the ?worry monster? shows up? How do you keep a positive focus on your pregnancy while not ignoring the realities of your individual health status and history?&nb
That is just awful and I can't imagine what she is going through. My heart would be breaking for her too and wanting to do something to show her that you all are thinking of her. As I get closer to my due date I often think of late term los
BFP #1 - missed m/c 4.18.11 found @8w3d, d&c @13w
BFP #2 blighted ovum found 8.2011 @8w, misoprostol
BFP#3 - missed m/c 6.11.12 @ 9w3d, d&c revealed extra chromosome 15
BFP#4 8.10.12, DD born 4/26/13
What do you do when the ?worry monster? shows up? How do you keep a positive focus on your pregnancy while not ignoring the realities of your individual health status and history?
I don't h
Qotw
I do worry alot especially when I have not felt the baby for a while. I know being 19 weeks you dont always feel them in there and with my first I did not even feel her unt
QOTW: One day at a time is what I keep telling myself and that there are no guarantees with anything. My dad was diagnosed with stage 3 lung c
BFP 12/13/12 EDD 8/22/13 Lilah Ruby born 8/8/13
I can't even begin to think of the heartbreak of your friend. We had an early loss before and I've kind of felt better after we passed that milesone, just reminds you of how precious and fragile life is.
<SPAN style="FO
~~~BFP 10/9/12, EDD 6/17/13~~~
QOTW: What do you do when the ?worry monster? shows up? How do you keep a positive focus on your pregnancy while not ignoring the realities of your individual health status and history?
I had
TTC #1 since 5/10
BFP #1 7/22/11 - EDD 4/2/11 - M/C 8/15/11 (7w0d)
BFP #2 9/23/11 - EDD 6/5/12 ♥It's a Girl♥
BFP #3 2/20/13 - EDD 11/2/13 ♥It's a Girl♥
I am so sorry to hear about your friend. It has to be an unimaginable loss. I hope they get some answers and find comfort in friends and family.
<p class="MsoPlainText" style="margin:0px 0px 10px;font-family:Arial, HelveticaI'm so sorry to hear about your friend. Stories like that are so frightening and sad, and I'm so sorry that she has to endure it. My thoughts and prayers go out to her.
I'm new; please add me to your list. I'm 37 years old and
QOTW - When the worry monster hits I try not to let it get to me, but sometimes (often) I am not able to put my fears aside. I find myself googling and talking to every one I know. A good friend of mine has been an excellent sounding board
TTC 10/11. IUI 2/12. BFP 3/8/12. 4/26/12 missed mc. RE consult 5/17/12. IVF #1 ER 7/13/12 53R, 41M ICSIed, 32F, 8 5d, 6 6d blasts - all PGD/frozen. PGD results 1 normal M and 1 normal F, 1 maybe M. FET 9/6, transferred 1 F embie. Beta 9/15 BFN. FET#2 planned for 11/2012 put off until 2013. Surprise BFP 11/21/12!! My son was born on 7/24/13!
Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. On another message board I read, a woman lost her baby a few days after birth after a normal pregnancy and normal labor. It really puts things into perspective and makes you respect how fragile the bi
Another new board member!
your screen name 10-4 Lil Buddy
first name (optional) Aileen
due date 11/12/13
sex of baby (if known, or will it be a surprise?)TWINS! No idea on gender yet.
QOTW: What do you do wh
My heart breaks for your friend, and as I sit with my hand on my belly, I am again so grateful for this little life inside of me. I just can't imagine the grief she is feeling, and hope she has good people around her to help her move through this diffi