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Trying not to go bananas...

Petunia844Petunia844 member
in Parenting after a Loss

DH is home for two weeks because he got this new job and decided to take a break in between... he had the idea that we should alternate Raylan days, so we both have every other day to do what we want.  We both have lots to do in preparation for moving and I have lots to do for starting my Etsy shop so it seems like a good idea in theory.  The problem?  R is right in the midst of the 4 month wakeful and it makes him pretty tricky to deal with.  DH isn't good at getting him to nap and I'm going bananas.  I can't say "no we can't do that because you are bad at taking care of our son."  It's so hard for me not to intervene... how can I get things done when I hear him getting hysterical because his naps have all been like 30 min long??

I know R is safe and DH is trying so I'm really trying my darndest not to intervene...but it sucks.  This isn't relaxing, it isn't helping me get stuff done.  DH got super mad just when I popped in his room when he was crying to see if he wanted help, I know he already thinks I don't trust his daddy skills... I know it's important to let him do this.  I know it won't really hurt R.  It just sucks and it's going to be a very long two weeks.  I've already left the house twice today to go to the store... but I do have to get stuff done.  Ugh.  Just needed to vent to try not to start a fight with DH. 

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Married the love of my life 7/11/09 - Our first baby, Peyton Mark, was born sleeping 10/25/11 at 33 weeks - Our second baby, BFP 2/4/12, welcome to the world Raylan! Holy Moly, BPF 2/4/14, please be safe and sound little one!

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Re: Trying not to go bananas...

  • martinimommamartinimomma member
    I vote for earplugs or headphones and tucking yourself in a room away from them and vowing to only check in every X amount of time. Or going to a local coffee shop with wifi and working on your etsy stuff for a while. Not easy. Good luck!

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    BFP #1 5/2010 - Missed m/c at 8 weeks
    BFP #2 2/2011
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    Surprise BFP 1/8/2013...say what? Baby A arrived 9/2013

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  • TnG05TnG05

    imagesandyd:
    I vote for earplugs or headphones and tucking yourself in a room away from them and vowing to only check in every X amount of time. Or going to a local coffee shop with wifi and working on your etsy stuff for a while. Not easy. Good luck!

    All of this but more if you can get out the house and do your stuff that would be best.  If not, HEADPHONES!!! 

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  • VeilSdeGTOVeilSdeGTO member
    imagesandyd:
    I vote for earplugs or headphones and tucking yourself in a room away from them and vowing to only check in every X amount of time. Or going to a local coffee shop with wifi and working on your etsy stuff for a while. Not easy. Good luck!
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    BFP 7.7.09 - CVS 9.10.09 (Girl) - 9.24.09 Severe Fatal Malformation - D&E 10.7.09 @ 17wks
    BFP 6.1.10 - 6.10.10 Ectopic M/C @ 5wks
    BFP 10.26.10 - 10.29.10 CP
    BFP 1.30.11 - CVS 3.28.11 (Girl) - EDD 10.11.11 - Born 10.6.11
    BFP 12.18.12 - 12.20.12 CP
    BFP 3.18.13 - CVS 5.21.13 (Girl) - EDD 12.2.13 - Born 11.24.13
    BFP 6.10.14 - CVS 7.2.14 (Girl) - EDD 1.12.15 - Born sleeping 8.6.14 @ 17w5d
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  • Ladiebug710Ladiebug710 member
    It is hard not to step in.  Just get out of the house so you cant hear what is going on.  You deserve some time to yourself.

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  • tetiananinatetiananina member
    I'm the same way! I just leave the room and try and tune it out or leave the house. If it the worst during naps then maybe plan to leave when it's that time? I use to give inputs on things but now I have to show that I have some faith in him and let him do it on his own. I sometimes try and sneak in helpful tips while he's crying too.

    BFP: 01/08/11 EDD: 09/15/11 Natural MC: 02/03/11
    BFP: 02/14/12 EDD: 10/26/12 D&C: 03/09/12
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  • JulyMomma2U2JulyMomma2U2 member
    I agree with trying to go out for a bit.. even if it's just more prevalent in the first few days.. just until DH figures out a system that works for him..
    Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03 BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d. BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012! BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013.  BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!

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  • jw87jw87 member
    ekk...

    Yea, I would be in the same boat.  Just try hard to ignore!  

    (Easier said than done I know)
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  • FmrAFBratFmrAFBrat member

    imagemissbea3:
    I agree with trying to go out for a bit.. even if it's just more prevalent in the first few days.. just until DH figures out a system that works for him..

    This. Or you could try to set up a space in another part of your house where you won't be bothered.

    TTC January 2010
    BFP #1 10-11-10 ectopic discovered 10-22-10, 10-23-10 methotrexate & emergency surgery, lost right tube BFP #2 12-1-10 Found to be tissue dropped from salingectomy or missed heterotopic pregnancy from BFP #1 BFP #3 1-30-11 DS arrived on due date 10-10-11 BFP #4 Surprise 9-3-12 EDD 5-9-13 DS2 arrived 5-5-13 BFP #5 5-14-14 Emergency D&C 6-16-14 9 weeks
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  • jertiejertie member
    Yep - I'm a total control freak - and I drive my poor DH nuts.  I'm learning to curb my tongue and action - because I know it drives me crazy when DH comes in and does the same thing to me.  He'll find his groove eventually - but I agree with Sandyd and just go someplace else while he's on duty.  GL!!!

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