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Is this tacky?

hoku82hoku82
in Baby Showers

I had a baby shower last weekend since I had 2 good friends offer to throw me one.  I do not like big parties and felt weird about having a party to get presents...so I kept it really small and did not give them that many people to invite.  I only had about 10-12 people total at my shower in the end. 

 So DH's family all live in another state/far away.  We also just saw them at christmas and got a few baby related presents from them at Christmas. So I did not put them on the invite list since I knew they could not come anyway and did not want anyone to feel like they needed to send me an extra present. 

 I did however have an invitation sent to my mother in law...because they were planning on coming to town sometime in February anyway and I did not want her to be in town the weekend of my shower and not have an invitation-but she was the only out of state person from DH's family that I invited.  She was not able to come that weekend but sent a present. 

 Anyway....I just found out that mother in law sent out all the shower info to everyone else in DH's family by email.  My hostess ended up getting a present for me in the mail that I opened at my shower-no one could figure out who it was from though at first.  I later found out that MIL sent out the shower info and the present came from DH's cousin. 

 Anyway..i'm not sure what MIL's email actualy said or who exactly she sent them to...but i'm worried that it might have been tacky.  I would have sent out invitations to the family if they wanted them but did not want to seem gift grabby.  I just hope his cousins and stuff know that I did not direct MIL to send the info out.  Is there a tactful way I can do this?

Anyway...sorry to ramble...I'm just irritated. I told DH I did not think she should have done that, but he does not think it is a big deal or that anyone would think negatively about it.  Would you side eye an email with shower info to a shower you were not invited to? (I kinda think I would).  What do you think?

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Re: Is this tacky?

  • Disneygeek77Disneygeek77 member
    Honestly, yeah I would side eye it.  Although, I don't know what you can do now without causing more drama.  Hopefully, people will realize it was MIL who did this and not you. 
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  • 1026pumpkin1026pumpkin member

    It seems kind of strange to me- does DH's family typically have an "all are welcome" type of attitude towards showers?  Maybe MIL is used to anyone who wants to go just showing up?  In either event, I don't think it will reflect poorly on you.  Anyone who thought the email was strange is going to side-eye MIL.

    As PP suggested, just send nice thank you notes for any gifts you receive.  If people mention the shower to you, you can just let them know it was a small, local shower and you're looking forward to them meeting the baby soon. 

    BabyFetus Ticker; Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • 526SadieSadie526SadieSadie member

    imageMandJS:
    It sounds awkward to me, but I think in this scenario, it's clearly on your MIL and not you. 

    I agree.  Without know the family dynamics it's hard to say but since it was a party thrown FOR you not BY you, it shouldn't reflect on you at all.

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