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October 2011 Moms
Mrs. Mo
member
I'm beyond overjoyed that 1) I'm able to give Gabby a sibling & 2) I didn't have to do IVF again.
HOWEVER, I am freaking out a bit because I start a new job in 2 weeks !!!
So, WWYD:
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
So, miracles do happen.
Mrs. Mo
member
Some of you all know my backstory with TTC Gabby & having less than 1% chance of conceiving on my own? Well, I'm 1.5 weeks "late". I put it in quotes because I really don't know when I ovulated since I didn't chart this month. I didn't chart since I was going through the interview process and everything, so we were kind of taking the month off. Between that & us, literally, only having sex ONCE all month ...that less that 1% was probably a h3ll of a lot lower.
So, back to me being 'late'. I decided to buy some tampons at CVS Friday morning as I have been fully expecting my period to start. On a whim, I grabbed a 2-pack of digital HPTs.
One I got into work (totally klassy), I POAS and it came back.......PREGNANT ! So, I POAS the 2nd one (with barely any pee hitting it since I just peed). Same thing.
So, back to me being 'late'. I decided to buy some tampons at CVS Friday morning as I have been fully expecting my period to start. On a whim, I grabbed a 2-pack of digital HPTs.
One I got into work (totally klassy), I POAS and it came back.......PREGNANT ! So, I POAS the 2nd one (with barely any pee hitting it since I just peed). Same thing.
I'm beyond overjoyed that 1) I'm able to give Gabby a sibling & 2) I didn't have to do IVF again.
HOWEVER, I am freaking out a bit because I start a new job in 2 weeks !!!
So, WWYD:
Would you tell them? I have to go for a preemployment physical at their Occ Health center & will obv have to tell them. (if they ask). Should I tell the hiring manager now or wait until I've been in the job a few weeks? I cannot afford for them to rescind the offer. If they did, I would totally be SOL as I cannot stay where I am now. If I waited to tell them until I was 12 weeks, how would you start that conversation? It would be really obvious that I was pregnant before I started and they may be very upset that I am due right before the busy season starts (so I will be on maternity leave during it).
For those I'm FB friends with, please don't post anything 
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
This discussion has been closed.
Re: So, miracles do happen.
Congratulations! That's such wonderful news!
Can they actually rescind the offer? You're hired already, right? Have you signed anything? Then unless you actually do something wrong (and getting knocked up doesn't count!), I wouldn't think they can just backtrack like that.
I was in a similar situation, where I actually interviewed for my new pt job the day after my BFP. I haven't mentioned anything to them yet, but it's slightly different since this is a contract that ends in June (with the option of doing it again next Sept-June, which I'm hoping I'll still be able to do even with the new baby).
BFP #1: July 12, 2010 Natural M/C: July 26, 2010
BFP #2: January 30 ,2011 Born: September 29, 2011
BFP #3: January 5, 2013 Born: August 25, 2013
I would not disclose your pregnancy until you are further along unless the nature of your job puts you in the way of anything that could physically harm you or the baby. If you go to their Occ Health, are they bound by HIPAA? I wouldn't think that someone there could just pick up the phone and "run tell dat" to your new boss if you were to tell them. I would at least wait till your new employee probation period is over, which is usually 90 days, if you are concerned. Legally, they cannot fire you for being pg, but they would never tell you that was the reason.
BFP 1/18/11, EDD 10/1/11. Born at 37w5d on 9/15/11.
***BFP Chart***
"There will come a time when you believe everything is finished. That will be the beginning.
Congrats!!! Thats so excited and amazing!!
I would not disclose it until you are further along and showing.
This is what I'm worried about. If I told them and they used some other stupid reason to get rid of me just so that they could have someone in place in time for their busy season.
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
IVF # 1 ~ Antagonist ~ ER 1/27/11~ ET 1/30/11 ~ + HPT 7dp3dt
DD born med-free on 10/24/11
Congratulations! That's awesome!
If it were me, I would still wait 12 weeks to tell your boss. You could just let them know that given your history of trouble TTC that you wanted to make sure you were in the "safer" zone before saying anything.
I agree with the others; I would keep it to yourself for a while.
ETA: also just wanted to add, if you are concerned about them firing you, you can always consult with the human resource department before your manager. Sometimes managers don't know all the policies put in place and if they do have a negative reaction it is because of pure ignorance. Human resources will know policy and have to follow them so it might make it easier, plus if you don't know you manager all to wel it might be easier to tell HR
Wow, congratulations Mo! The same thing happened to me and I didn't tell till I was a couple months along. How are they to know when you found out?
I agree with this, and congratulations! what a thrill!
They agreed to pay half my cobra for my maternity leave and let me take 12 weeks off even though I wasn't eligible for FMLA.
That's true but since I'm due in Sept, it's either I knew before I started or am a case of " I didn't know I was pregnant."
The other thing I'm worried about is how to deal with doc appts. I'm hoping I can get my 1st visit in before I leave my current job b/c I don't want to have to start asking to leave early etc, when I just started there.
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
YAY!!!!! Congratulations! I am so very happy for you. That is awesome!
I dont really know what to tell you about telling the new job. I would probably wait until I started and explain you weren't pg/did not know when you interviewed and accepted the job. Good luck!
Married 08/18/07
BFP 02/15/11 EDD 10/27/11 Born at 35w3d on 09/25/11
BFP 10/13/12 EDD 06/25/13 Born at 37w0d on 06/04/13
BFP 12/11/15 EDD 08/23/16 Early miscarriage
BFP 02/02/16 EDD 10/16/16
In the early stages, there aren't too many appts anyway usually (not sure if your history means you get more), so you should be able to work it and only have to ask for minimal time off.
And there are all kinds of reasons why you wouldn't know. Not to mention that it's completely normal and well within your rights to know and not tell anyone until you're further along.
When's your EDD?!
BFP #1: July 12, 2010 Natural M/C: July 26, 2010
BFP #2: January 30 ,2011 Born: September 29, 2011
BFP #3: January 5, 2013 Born: August 25, 2013
Based on my calculations: 9/28. However, I'm trying to get the OB to do a dating u/s so I know for sure.
"Most of the important things in the world have been accomplished by people who have kept on trying when there seemed to be no hope at all." -- Dale Carnegie
"Our greatest weakness lies in giving up. The most certain way to succeed is always to try just one more time." --Thomas A. Edison
That's so exciting! My dating u/s is on Wednesday (standard practice with my doc, even though there's very little question about when I'm due). I hope that they'll do one for you!
BFP #1: July 12, 2010 Natural M/C: July 26, 2010
BFP #2: January 30 ,2011 Born: September 29, 2011
BFP #3: January 5, 2013 Born: August 25, 2013
Ah I am so happy for you MrsMo!!
I agree with AmyC in your reasoning to wait to tell your manager.
Congratulations! :-)
#1 BFP 2/24/11 EDD 10/29/11 Born 11/1/11
(via emergency c-section due to prolapsed cord; dx with sensorineural hearing loss Feb 2012)
#2 BFP 9/13/12 EDD 5/20/13 Natural M/C 10/3/12
#3 BFP 11/13/12 EDD 7/27/13
That's wonderful news! Congratulations.
Personally I wouldn't tell your job about the pregnancy yet. They legally can't rescind the offer for being pregnant, but they can certainly make up some excuse to let you go in the near future. I agree with pp who said you could tell them that due to your fertility issues in the past you didn't feel comfortable announcing until after the first tri. They can't argue with that.
This exactly. So happy for you, congrats!
4 Clomid cycles BFN's,3 injectible cycles BFN, 3 failed IUI's
Hystroscopy to remove cysts 11/2010
IVF #1 with ICSI Graydon Dane born Oct. 23, 2011 via c-section at 38 weeks.
Surprise BFP 10/9/12. Blighted ovum at 8wks. D&C 11/1/12.
Surprise BFP#2 TWINS!!! Boy/Girl twins.
I agree with this. And congratulations! That's such exciting news!
So amazing! Congratulations.
I would wait to tell your office until the first tri is over.
Burned by the Bear
I am so excited for you!
Congrats! I vote 'don't tell', too!
(All these BFPs are giving me the FEVER. Dammit.)
Congrats on the surprise BFP!
Does your new job physically require anything that you wouldn't be able to handle with pregnancy? If not, I would not disclose it now. For all they know, you haven't POAS yet.
I didn't realize physicals as part of your employment are even legal! Doesn't that seem kind of invasive and discriminatory? I mean, unless you are in the military, your employer should not have that kind of intimate knowledge of your health.