OK I got pregnant very unplanned and due to morning sickness, my managers and co workers figured it out pretty fast. they just all had a "meeting" and one of the assistant mangers told me that they were all talking about me (and my situation) in the meeting. I'm PISSED off at this. It is not their business to talk about me like this behind my back! It's a personal and non work related matter. I'm so pissed off and want to know what my rights are and what I can do...if anything. Thanks to soaring hormones I came home bawling my eyes out...I'm so angry with them. They're all talking about me and it's none of their business.
I would beg to differ that it's none of their business. Your pregnancy will affect them and their department when you are on maternity leave. As long as they don't use the knowledge of your pregnancy against you, they can discuss it as freely as they want.
I'm sorry you are having such horrible morning sickness, but take a step back here, take a big breath or two and brush it off. This isn't a big deal if nothing malicious is going on.
Who all was in this meeting? If it was all management, then they have the right to speak about their employees at their will. If the meeting included fellow co-workers who you do not report to, then it is not the business of management to discuss the personal business of an employee in front of general staff. If it is the latter, your only recourse would be to document it, speak with your supervisor about it, or filing a formal complain with HR.
I would beg to differ that it's none of their business. Your pregnancy will affect them and their department when you are on maternity leave. As long as they don't use the knowledge of your pregnancy against you, they can discuss it as freely as they want.
I'm sorry you are having such horrible morning sickness, but take a step back here, take a big breath or two and brush it off. This isn't a big deal if nothing malicious is going on.
This. Especially if you're missing work because of morning sickness, your coworkers will discuss it.
Let it go. People gossip about their coworkers all the time, and unless your manager is disclosing confidential information or creating a hostile work environment, neither of which this sounds like, you have no "rights" in this situation. And complaining will likely make the situation worse.
Sweetie, calm down. The other posters are correct. Unless they are planning on using the knowledge of your pregnancy to somehow undermine you at work, they are free to talk about it. Keep doing your job, let the little stuff go. Things are not going to get any easier.
promised myself I'd retire when I turned gold, and yet here I am
I can understand being upset if you got "outed" at work before you were ready to share and if it sounds like people are gossiping about you. I think you need some more information before you take any action, though. Was this a meeting where managers were discussing work loads and making contingency plans to cover your work while you are out of the office, or was it managers discussing with employees. Also, if employees were involved, did they simply say they were discussing ways to cover your work, or did they tell co-workers that you are pregnant.
If people are discussing that you are pregnant and/or medical issues with your peers, that is an issue, and I'd discuss it with the managers and HR. If it was simply the managers discussing work load, that's just a part of business.
I would try to relax tonight, get a good night's sleep, and discuss with the managers in the morning in a calm and professional manner.
I agree with the others. You're letting your hormones get the best of you. Unless there's something you're not saying, it's perfectly ok that they are discussing your pregnancy in so far as how it will affect the team/business.
I'm confused about the use of 'rights'- rights to what? not have other ppl talk about you at work?
they could have been saying, god I feel horrible for how sick she's been, or how should cover her role if she has to come in late or miss b/c of her sickness or pregnancy, or wow that sucks how she has to run out of the room to puke...or any other number of things that aren't horrible & even if they're a little annoyed for some reason, ehhhh...so be it. hope you feel better soon.
Slow down there, it isnt a big deal. What kind of "rights" are you talking about here? You want to take legal action because people talked about you being pregnant after you announced it?
no i don't want to take legal action. and they ratted me out. i work with a relative too and when one of them put it togethter that I was pregnant they went to my family member (who i had not told yet b/c i was waiting to tell anyone) and talked about it to my family member who then told the rest of the family. i had NOT announced it yet and i don't understand why they wouldn't have come ask me and not my relative...
no i don't want to take legal action. and they ratted me out. i work with a relative too and when one of them put it togethter that I was pregnant they went to my family member (who i had not told yet b/c i was waiting to tell anyone) and talked about it to my family member who then told the rest of the family. i had NOT announced it yet and i don't understand why they wouldn't have come ask me and not my relative...
In this case, they were discussing your private medical information, and that is a big deal. I would discuss this with your manager and HR.
no i don't want to take legal action. and they ratted me out. i work with a relative too and when one of them put it togethter that I was pregnant they went to my family member (who i had not told yet b/c i was waiting to tell anyone) and talked about it to my family member who then told the rest of the family. i had NOT announced it yet and i don't understand why they wouldn't have come ask me and not my relative...
In this case, they were discussing your private medical information, and that is a big deal. I would discuss this with your manager and HR.
DiSagree here. They didn't have confirmation from her doctor just a guess so that's not hippa protected.
It was unprofessional to discuss amongst persons not in mgmt but legally speaking I don't tnk you have a case
Yeah, I'm w/ wife07. In the end, it was all gossip and speculation on their part.
However, doesn't make it right. Honestly, at a MINIMUM, I would talk to your manager about this. How upset you are, how a relative was pulled into this, etc. And depending on his/her reaction, I may consider going to HR too.
"Beer is living proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." ~Benjamin Franklin
no i don't want to take legal action. and they ratted me out. i work with a relative too and when one of them put it togethter that I was pregnant they went to my family member (who i had not told yet b/c i was waiting to tell anyone) and talked about it to my family member who then told the rest of the family. i had NOT announced it yet and i don't understand why they wouldn't have come ask me and not my relative...
In this case, they were discussing your private medical information, and that is a big deal. I would discuss this with your manager and HR.
DiSagree here. They didn't have confirmation from her doctor just a guess so that's not hippa protected.
It was unprofessional to discuss amongst persons not in mgmt but legally speaking I don't tnk you have a case
Yeah, I'm w/ wife07. In the end, it was all gossip and speculation on their part.
However, doesn't make it right. Honestly, at a MINIMUM, I would talk to your manager about this. How upset you are, how a relative was pulled into this, etc. And depending on his/her reaction, I may consider going to HR too.
I agree. There are two separate issues: one with work and the other w/ your relative sharing news w/ your family. If you're still angry today, discuss it w/ your manager. Since it will be the 1st time confirming you are expecting I would have a clear role in mind of how you plan to handle MS, drs appts, maternity leave,etc...
Speak to the relative outside of work regarding the announcement to your family.
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no i don't want to take legal action. and they ratted me out. i work with a relative too and when one of them put it togethter that I was pregnant they went to my family member (who i had not told yet b/c i was waiting to tell anyone) and talked about it to my family member who then told the rest of the family. i had NOT announced it yet and i don't understand why they wouldn't have come ask me and not my relative...
In this case, they were discussing your private medical information, and that is a big deal. I would discuss this with your manager and HR.
No it's not her "private medical information" it's gossip and speculation about whether she is pregnant or not. Big difference. She has no "rights" here. People talk about each other in a co-worker environment. She might be frustrated, but all HR is going to do is tell her to grow a thicker skin.
I think probably the deeper route of her frustration is that it is unplanned (and depending on her situation that could be rather embarrassing).
A relative, who you work with, talked to other relatives about your pregnancy? Is that right? That's not really a work issue, its gossipy relative/family issue.
Its a fact of life, I'm not sure there's anything to be done about this.
Don't be upset by some of the responses. They're right, in that your co-workers don't seem to have done anything legally wrong, but of course what they've done is wrong in the non-legal sense. Work is annoying during pregnancy for most people- either people are gossiping or making stupid comments ("Where's your glow?", "You're huge", etc.), and unfortunately yours just started earlier than most. I think you should just talk to whoever you think is appropriate and let them know that you really don't want anyone to know yet because you're still so early in the pregnancy and ask them to stop talking about it. Everyone should understand this. Sorry for what you're going through! But remember the baby's what's most important and try not to stress over these annoyances at work.
It is no fun to feel "talked about." But it sounds like this is just gossip, and not worthy of any action with a supervisor or HR - I think that would make it worse.
I think the best thing you can do is act as professionally as you can. Don't engage in gossip or rumors. Do your job the best you can, don't discuss personal information at work, and don't act like other people's gossip is bothering you.
Re: what are my rights in this case
I would beg to differ that it's none of their business. Your pregnancy will affect them and their department when you are on maternity leave. As long as they don't use the knowledge of your pregnancy against you, they can discuss it as freely as they want.
I'm sorry you are having such horrible morning sickness, but take a step back here, take a big breath or two and brush it off. This isn't a big deal if nothing malicious is going on.
This. Especially if you're missing work because of morning sickness, your coworkers will discuss it.
Let it go. People gossip about their coworkers all the time, and unless your manager is disclosing confidential information or creating a hostile work environment, neither of which this sounds like, you have no "rights" in this situation. And complaining will likely make the situation worse.
wait, what? what did they say about you? I'm pretty sure its not illegal to talk about people, even pregnant co-workers.
I can understand being upset if you got "outed" at work before you were ready to share and if it sounds like people are gossiping about you. I think you need some more information before you take any action, though. Was this a meeting where managers were discussing work loads and making contingency plans to cover your work while you are out of the office, or was it managers discussing with employees. Also, if employees were involved, did they simply say they were discussing ways to cover your work, or did they tell co-workers that you are pregnant.
If people are discussing that you are pregnant and/or medical issues with your peers, that is an issue, and I'd discuss it with the managers and HR. If it was simply the managers discussing work load, that's just a part of business.
I would try to relax tonight, get a good night's sleep, and discuss with the managers in the morning in a calm and professional manner.
I'm confused about the use of 'rights'- rights to what? not have other ppl talk about you at work?
they could have been saying, god I feel horrible for how sick she's been, or how should cover her role if she has to come in late or miss b/c of her sickness or pregnancy, or wow that sucks how she has to run out of the room to puke...or any other number of things that aren't horrible & even if they're a little annoyed for some reason, ehhhh...so be it. hope you feel better soon.
In this case, they were discussing your private medical information, and that is a big deal. I would discuss this with your manager and HR.
However, doesn't make it right. Honestly, at a MINIMUM, I would talk to your manager about this. How upset you are, how a relative was pulled into this, etc. And depending on his/her reaction, I may consider going to HR too.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
I agree. There are two separate issues: one with work and the other w/ your relative sharing news w/ your family. If you're still angry today, discuss it w/ your manager. Since it will be the 1st time confirming you are expecting I would have a clear role in mind of how you plan to handle MS, drs appts, maternity leave,etc...
Speak to the relative outside of work regarding the announcement to your family.
No it's not her "private medical information" it's gossip and speculation about whether she is pregnant or not. Big difference. She has no "rights" here. People talk about each other in a co-worker environment. She might be frustrated, but all HR is going to do is tell her to grow a thicker skin.
I think probably the deeper route of her frustration is that it is unplanned (and depending on her situation that could be rather embarrassing).
This all seems silly.
A relative, who you work with, talked to other relatives about your pregnancy? Is that right? That's not really a work issue, its gossipy relative/family issue.
Its a fact of life, I'm not sure there's anything to be done about this.
HIPAA:
https://www.hhs.gov/ocr/privacy/hipaa/understanding/index.html
Office gossip does not fall under HIPAA.
OP: have a constructive conversation with your supervisor/manager now that the cat's out of the bag. It's a good time.
Even then the truth is a defense to either of those claims--so she's SOL
It is no fun to feel "talked about." But it sounds like this is just gossip, and not worthy of any action with a supervisor or HR - I think that would make it worse.
I think the best thing you can do is act as professionally as you can. Don't engage in gossip or rumors. Do your job the best you can, don't discuss personal information at work, and don't act like other people's gossip is bothering you.