So what do I do NOW?

Hi-I used to be on these boards a lot when I had IF issues and then after my 1st was born. Now, with 2 I can't find the time or energy to do anything but take care of them. I am getting nervous, as I had PPD after my 1st, got pregnant, it went away during pregnancy with my 2nd and 3 months after my 2nd arrived, it came back ten-fold. I still have it and it's almost 2 years later. (I don't know if that's even considered PPD anymore) I have tried everything. Therapy, exercising, going to mommy groups - I must have joined 5 groups and have been going to countless classes and I am unable to make friends with any other moms. I live in a secluded area, with NO neighborhood kids around. Believe me, I tried and I am friendly, but the reaction I get from other women is disheartening. I have stopped trying so hard, thinking that may be the problem, but that didn't help either. I am hundreds of miles from my family and my husband works from the time the kids get up till well after they (and myself) are in bed for the night. My one child is even in preschool and has never been asked on 1 playdate! Is this normal?? I blame myself! I love my kids and love being able to stay home with them but this is becoming a nightmare! And I really don't know what else I can do to get out of this depression. Anyone ever felt like this!!??