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March 2013 Moms
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Thoughts and opinions needed...

MeganMPQMeganMPQ member
in March 2013 Moms

Hi Everyone, 

I haven't posted much on here but have been keeping up to date with everyone's posts.  It's so exciting as we all near our big day!!! I hope you all feel great during your prep time for little one(s)!

I coach a competitive kids sports team in Canada and have run into a problem for the upcoming weekend.  We have our first competition of the year across the border in the US, and when we were planning at the beginning of the season I didn't think it would be a big deal for me to attend.  At a family gathering this past weekend (which sadly, was due to my Grandpa passing), my aunts, dad and now my husband insisted that I shouldn't be going over.  We've since confirmed that out of country travel insurance does NOT cover pregnant women who are closer than 9 weeks to their expected due date.  In the chance that anything were to happen while I am over there, we'd have to pay 100% for the US medical costs out of our pocket.  Although it is only a one day event and I don't plan on even spending the night, my husband is now pretty upset that I still plan on going.  It will be a VERY long day of managing 12 girls aged 7-14 while they compete in about 8 different events, but our other coach is unable to attend due to a vacation scheduled a long time ago so I feel like I really have no choice.  It was suggested that the parents of the team could handle it without me, but our team is only 2 years old so for most parents this will be their first event. 

The event is held about an hour and a half from the Canadian border, so a friend (that has never had kids) suggested that if by chance something were to happen I could just drive back across to Canada.

What are your thoughts? Would you guys go to the event with the thought the chances of actually going into labour 6 wks early are pretty small, or listen to your family members and attempt to make them happy and not go?

 

Thanks in advance :) 

 

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Re: Thoughts and opinions needed...

  • shellmhshellmh member
    I think I'd go. I personally would probably ask my DH to come with me, if he was able to. That way we'd both feel comfortable with my being there. He'd be there to watch me and make sure I was okay, and also to drive me back if need be (like your friend mentioned). Also, that way he could help you out during the day, maybe with some of your duties for the day, or at least with making sure you were getting enough water, food, etc. and sitting down enough.
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  • aprilsarahjuneaprilsarahjune member

    Well, my initial thought is that you could probably have a full-term, normal delivery in the US for a few thousand dollars.  I guess depending on your situation, that may or may not be a lot of money, but that may put the cost risk into perspective for you.  Since your chances of having to deliver in the US on a single day visit are pretty low, it may be worth the risk (again depending on your financial situation).

     That being said, there is one more hiccup to the cost and logistics dilemma - if your baby were born this weekend, he would be premature.  Would your insurance cover baby's NICU/special care nursery costs in the US?  (This may be different from the question whether they would cover you.)  Also, would you be willing to spend a few weeks - perhaps 2 to 4 - in the US so that you could be close to your baby?  What type of documents would you need to gather before you could cross the border back to Canada with baby? (Are you willing to deal with a US birth certificate?) Again, all of this is unlikely and is certainly the worst case scenario, but it is worth considering.

    Have you thought about the potential issue with the initial border crossing in the US?  https://help.cbp.gov/app/answers/detail/a_id/882/~/visit-the-u.s.-while-pregnant-and-the-risks-involved.  There is a small chance that you may never even make it into the US at 34 weeks pregnant.

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  • TMWarren85TMWarren85 member
    I would still go; the chances of you going into pre-term labor if you are not currently at risk for it are minimal- but if you start to experience and contractions, cramping, etc. you only have a 90 minute drive back to Canada. My OB office is almost 45 minutes away from my house and that's the drive I will have to take regardless. If your husband is really upset about it try to talk him through it. Why is he upset, what are his concerns, are they valid? Can you take him to your next check-up and let him ask your physician directly if he/she thinks it's ok? Maybe he would feel better hearing from your doctor that there's no concern (and if there is a concern than you can address is then).  If he's completely against it and something did happen while you were gone, would he blame you for complications? I understand the importance of the competition, and like I said- personally I would go (but take time to rest, get plenty liquids and food, etc.) but if it's going to cause a *problem* in your relationship is it worth it?
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  • guilletskichukguilletskichuk member

    I agree with the other PPs. They all have very good points.

    I would think that if you started feeling contractions etc., you could scramble back for the border. 90 minutes isn't that far of a drive in the whole scheme of things. I have a 45 min. drive to my hospital (in good weather) and a gf of mine has a 2 hour drive to hers. However, aprilsarahjune also has some very valid points that I never would have considered. You may want to do a bit more reading up before making your final decision.

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  • KYmama9286KYmama9286 member

    I was thinking that you shouldn't go until I got to the part where it said that you will only be 1.5 hours from the border/your hospital. I would absolutely go if it is that short of a drive and if your DH is worried then have him come with you. I don't know anyone and have never heard of anyone who had a 1st time labor that was truly that fast. Even if your water broke and contractions started immediately you would still have time- it's not like on TV where you go into labor and you have to get to the hospital in minutes, you almost always have time. Plus if you haven't had any signs of pre-term labor there is no reason to think you would randomly go into labor. Listen to your body and try and take it easy while you are there. GL to your team!

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  • sucrets4sucrets4 member

    I had DD1 at 33w5d, where you are right now.  My water broke at 6:20am and I had her by section (she was breech) at 6:33pm.  I didn't even start feeling contrax until noon but my labor did go very fast from there.  But clearly, something was wrong and my body needed her out, even though I'll never know why.

    That being said, if you are prepared, you should go.  I like the suggestion of bringing DH and I'd make sure you have parent helpers there, clear on their duties if you were go into labor.

    Can you ask your dr about going?  Maybe if they gave you an u/s to make sure your placenta is okay, that would set your mind more at ease.   

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