Thank you all SO much for all the support in my first post. It helped me realize that I wasn't going out of my mind, that all those emotions were normal.
Since that post, I'm very happy to announce that she's off of CPAP and on cannula! She fluctuated yesterday between 30-35% oxygen, today it's down to 25-30% - we're progressing! Also, they upped her TPN and fat intake, AND they started giving her the colostrum I've been pumping! The first day, the amount I was getting kept going down, but today it's been coming in with my milk, so I've been getting tremendous amounts. She's been taking it and digesting her feedings like a champion, so well that they increased the amount from 8ml to 10ml.
Her biliruben levels went up from 6 to 9, so she's now on a bili blanket and under the bililights.
Today was also a great day because I finally got to hold my little fighting TigerLilly! I got to see her without her 'sunglasses', which was so awesome. She had become inconsolable, and had started desatting. So her nurse took a gamble, wrapped her up, and put her in my arms. BAM - instantaneously, Lilly calmed down, her O2 sats shot back up, and she opened her eyes. This made for one very happy mommy.
She's doing very well, her nurses are very pleased. I'm hoping - cautiously - that this is a good thing, and that maybe she won't be here that long.
Re: Lilly Update
DS1: Quinn - 10.22.10 and DS2: Cole - 01.18.13