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Parenting
a WWYD from an AE
Yes, this is an AE, but no this is not MUD. I post regularly, but have a few friends also on these boards and I don't want anyone IRL reading this.
So last night my phone stopped sending texts for some reason. My phone often randomly decides to quit doing things. I could receive texts, just not send them. So I sent a few texts to DH' s phone, so I could see if they were going through. I also used his phone to send myself a text, so I could be sure my phone was receiving them. In doing this, a text from his male co-worker caught my eye, so curiosity got the best of me and I opened it. This is what they said-
DH: Do you have access to FB right now without the Mrs. around?
CoW: Not right now, why
DH: You have to see something
CoW: ??
DH: (Female co-worker)'s nipple
CoW: No way! Where?
DH: Cover photo, green shirt, no bra. It's amazing. Enlarge the pic and it's even better
CoW: We should just start calling her Nip. She's so hot.
I mean, did I marry a freaking 12 year old? Yes, I know if you decide to snoop you have to be prepared to deal with what you find. But I'm really annoyed and bothered by this. Do I have a right to be? WWYD?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: a WWYD from an AE
If this is the only crime he's committed, then I wouldn't be mad. Sounds like guy stuff.
But not sure I'd be mad. Not like he text CoW saying, "check out this hottie". If we were at a bar and DH friend pointed out a hottie with her nipple out, DH and I would both look. Nbd IMO.
Agree.
I would be pissed & would not be able to keep it to myself. I would totally call him out on it, but I'm the jealous type. So there's that.
Well, I don't know about your rights, as far as being annoyed go but I would blow it off. Someone else told him about a nip pic. Maybe he looked at it and maybe he didn't. Either way, he wasn't cheating on you.
Honestly, this nipple picture feels like the type of thing DH and I would have a good laugh at together.
If anything, you might want to send an anonymous message to the coworker to let her know about the picture so she can take it down.
Burned by the Bear
yeah....
He was the one pointing it out to the co-worker
I hear ya when it's someone IRL type thing. But DH wasn't jerking off to her. CoW may have been but DH didn't seem to do anything wrong besides possibly befriend a frat boy at work.
If it came up, like I'd try to make it come up with something like:
...while looking at FB, someone get to her picture, comment on how pretty she is, then drop "holy crap! Is that her nipple?! Geez! What are people thinking... Her work can view this and hottie showing bewbs!"
In a lol type way.... Just to see his reaction but also let it be known that you know there's a hottie in the office who doesn't mind nipple exposer.
Meh, I don't think it would bother me too much. I'd probably call him out on it just so I could laugh at him for being immature.
This is harmless.
I promise you your husband still checks out other women just like you check out other men.
If this is the worst thing you found on your husband's phone, I would say you have nothing to worry about.
Btw, LD and I were wondering if you would link us the FB profile pic. Thanks.
Yeah, I'd be pissed.
Ha, that's a good question and I've actually asked myself the same thing. I think it's because it's someone he knows and sees daily. Also from their texts it seemed to me like they had discussed her and her hotness before. AND the fact that he admitted to enlarging it so he could get a better look...I don't know, this is messing with me though and I feel really irritated about it.
So what if he finds her attractive? My wife finds other dudes attractive and I find other women attractive too. It isn't like we got married and all of a sudden I hated TNA.
Do you work? Do you find any of your male coworkers hot? If you found a hot picture of them on fb wouldn't you check it out? I doubt anyone here would get all holier than thou over a picture of a hot dude.
Really, it's not the end of the world. Your DH checks out another woman. So what. So does everyone else in America.
Yes, it kind of sucks to find a message about it since it's one of those things most people want to be blissfully ignorant to--especially those kinds of graphic details. It isn't the end of the world though. It's certainly not something you should get pisssed off over.
I am the jealous kind of girlfriend (but not like psychotic haha) and this doesn't really bother me. I would probably mention it to him and see what he says.
I don't give a flip about my husband looking at boobs. I would be pissed because this is his co-worker and it seems like she is a topic of conversation b/t him and the other guy. The fact that this woman is someone he works with means there is a pretty good chance that there is flirting involved. The whole office flirting situation can become pretty sticky.
Hot chicks in the office are always topics of conversation among male coworkers.
Ok. I guess I just don't know because I'm not a male. It would still bother me, but like I said, I am the jealous type. Can't help it. I guess this is better than finding a text from the hot co-worker on his phone.
Yeah--I can say I've talked about hot male coworkers to female coworkers. I think this goes both ways.
That doesn't mean I've thrown myself at them and tried to sleep with them.
Ok, we are eye to eye here pretty much. I know he finds other people attractive, as do I. It just feels to me like she is someone they talk about frequently. Plus, yes I might check out a pic of a hot co-worker. But I don't then call or text someone else to gush about what I just saw. I don't worry about him cheating on me, this conversation just made me uncomfortable.
Absolutely! If this chick had texted a boob pic to her husband- then yes, that is an issue.
I'm willing to bet boatloads of money that of every woman on this board, 100% of their DHs/SOs have discussed an attractive woman before to another guy. Every last one.
As long as it doesn't read inside every 12 yr old boy ...
DH has said and done way worse in front of me. If you call him out on it, you're going to look bad. He won't believe the story about your phone on the fritz. I would let it go. Or, you could get even and post a pic of yourself where a nip is visible and see if he likes getting a text about how hot you are!!!
Exactly! I'm pretty sure my DH would never cheat, but stuff like this still irritates me.
You're not a guy. They take pictures of their poop and send it to each other. If your husband had something to hide, he'd put a code on his phone so you couldn't see it.
The fact that you're so wound up about it makes me wonder if you have any other reason to be concerned. Do you?
No, I don't think so. It just rubbed me the wrong way I guess. But you're all right, it's nothing to be upset over.
I feel like all the posters saying not to worry about it is solid, sound advice.
BUT I'm a jealous person and I would be totally irritated. I don't know how I'd handle it. It's probably best to not make a big deal of it.