FFFC

MollySm · January 2013

RNmama12:
Jeanine88:
RNmama12:
heymommy:
RNmama12:
I give DS juice. He drinks about 2-3 cups of milk and 2 cups of juice per day.  He drinks apple, pear, coconut milk, etc.  I buy organic and the only ingredients are the fruit and Vit C usually. They are "no sugar added" and I don't see the big deal.  I always have a cup of water available when he is playing and he drinks it from time to time, but likes juice and milk much more.
 
Do you water it down? 
No.  I buy the already watered down apple juice, but for pear juice or coconut milk I don't water it down.  I don't see the point in watering down juice that has no sugar added to it.  Is there any reasoning behind it?  This weekend I had a patient at work with a 22 month old and she asked for a Pepsi, which I assumed was for the patient.  When I brought the pepsi to the room she opened her daughters bottle and poured it in there for her.  I don't feel bad about giving juice, especially after seeing things like that.  I brush DS's teeth every night and he eats a healthy diet.

Just be careful with the juice. My 3 year old cousin has 6 cavities from drinking too much juice. They had to cap all of the cavities because he's not ready to lose his teeth yet and if they leave the cavities it is painful and they will rot the adult tooth.
He only drinks juice at the table while eating and I brush his teeth before bed.   Honest question, no snark intended:  How is drinking juice worse than drinking formula/BM before bed and not having teeth brushed after that?  Most formula has some sort of corn syrup/sugar as the primary ingredient.  Any food that is a carb has a form of sugar in it.  DS is formula fed, but I still consider formula to be "sugary" due to the ingredients.  Formula may not taste sweet, but it does contain sugar in some form.   IMO, giving DS apple juice would expose his teeth to the same amount of sugar as if he were just eating the apple.  I know fresh fruit is better for him, but juice has the same sugar content as the actual fruit does, just in a more concentrated form (if the juice is no sugar added).  I'm just not sure how all of this adds up as far as dental health.

From my perspective, the difference is that babies need the formula or breastmilk, so we deal with the sugar as far as teeth go, but they don't need juice.

cheese.fiend · January 2013

MollySm:
RNmama12:
Jeanine88:
RNmama12:
heymommy:
RNmama12:
I give DS juice. He drinks about 2-3 cups of milk and 2 cups of juice per day. He drinks apple, pear, coconut milk, etc. I buy organic and the only ingredients are the fruit and Vit C usually. They are "no sugar added" and I don't see the big deal. I always have a cup of water available when he is playing and he drinks it from time to time, but likes juice and milk much more.

Do you water it down?
No. I buy the already watered down apple juice, but for pear juice or coconut milk I don't water it down. I don't see the point in watering down juice that has no sugar added to it. Is there any reasoning behind it? This weekend I had a patient at work with a 22 month old and she asked for a Pepsi, which I assumed was for the patient. When I brought the pepsi to the room she opened her daughters bottle and poured it in there for her. I don't feel bad about giving juice, especially after seeing things like that. I brush DS's teeth every night and he eats a healthy diet.
Just be careful with the juice. My 3 year old cousin has 6 cavities from drinking too much juice. They had to cap all of the cavities because he's not ready to lose his teeth yet and if they leave the cavities it is painful and they will rot the adult tooth.
He only drinks juice at the table while eating and I brush his teeth before bed. Honest question, no snark intended: How is drinking juice worse than drinking formula/BM before bed and not having teeth brushed after that? Most formula has some sort of corn syrup/sugar as the primary ingredient. Any food that is a carb has a form of sugar in it. DS is formula fed, but I still consider formula to be "sugary" due to the ingredients. Formula may not taste sweet, but it does contain sugar in some form. IMO, giving DS apple juice would expose his teeth to the same amount of sugar as if he were just eating the apple. I know fresh fruit is better for him, but juice has the same sugar content as the actual fruit does, just in a more concentrated form (if the juice is no sugar added). I'm just not sure how all of this adds up as far as dental health.
From my perspective, the difference is that babies need the formula or breastmilk, so we deal with the sugar as far as teeth go, but they don't need juice.

This is my thought process as well. Most of the nutrients in fruit are striped from the juice so there really is very little nutritional value, where as milk and formula are packed with essential nutrients. I'm in the "why give it to them if they don't need it?" camp.

NatnDyl · January 2013

My confession is that I feel broken. I've been seeing a counselor once or twice a month for about 2 years. I've been off and on prozac for about a year. I don't feel like any of it does anything. I swear I'm having the same 5 conversations over and over on a loop. Also my parents think that mental health stuff isn't real and I'm just being dramatic and I should just pull it together. Thanks Mom and Dad! I'm so frustrated that I can't just be. I just want to get through the day like everyone else.

cheese.fiend · January 2013

I love breastfeeding and I am very proud of myself for making it this far, but I will be ready to wean at one year. I really thought I'd be into extending BFing, but the honest truth is I want my body back. I can't lose these last 15 lbs without diet and any time I try to cut calories, my supply tanks. My right boob already stopped producing so I am extremely lopsided. I just want to feel like me again, and I know if I continue to BF after a year, I will just become one of those Mommy Martyrs.

Jen0204 · January 2013

NatnDyl:
My confession is that I feel broken. I've been seeing a counselor once or twice a month for about 2 years. I've been off and on prozac for about a year. I don't feel like any of it does anything. I swear I'm having the same 5 conversations over and over on a loop. Also my parents think that mental health stuff isn't real and I'm just being dramatic and I should just pull it together. Thanks Mom and Dad! I'm so frustrated that I can't just be. I just want to get through the day like everyone else.

I'm sorry you feel that way Sad Have you been seeing the same counselor? Maybe a new one and/or a different medication would help?

NatnDyl · January 2013

Jen0204:

NatnDyl:
My confession is that I feel broken. I've been seeing a counselor once or twice a month for about 2 years. I've been off and on prozac for about a year. I don't feel like any of it does anything. I swear I'm having the same 5 conversations over and over on a loop. Also my parents think that mental health stuff isn't real and I'm just being dramatic and I should just pull it together. Thanks Mom and Dad! I'm so frustrated that I can't just be. I just want to get through the day like everyone else.

I'm sorry you feel that way Have you been seeing the same counselor? Maybe a new one and/or a different medication would help?

Yeah the same counselor. I should try to switch, but he has odd hours which make it so I don't have to take time off work. I feel like just quitting going and muddling through myself. Everyone has some degree of anxiety in their life and maybe I'm stronger than I think.

danac2010 · January 2013

Jen0204:
MrMrsandBaby:
I can't understand why it is such a big deal to leave your LO for a night. If you don't have family or someone to watch LO then ok, that I can see...but I just can't understand why it is so hard for some moms (on this board and IRL)?

DH and I have been away three nights and honestly, I loved it! Sleeping until 8:00, not worrying about MOTN wake ups...and Allison had a ball with my parents, she slept better there than she does at home.

If you haven't done it yet...I highly recommend it.
I 100% agree with this. It's one thing if you have no family close by or are EBF, but I definitely side eye people who won't leave their kids for a few hours at this point. And I think an overnight away is awesome! Due to the holidays the girls spent a night at my MILs 3 times between November and December (one night because we went to the city with friends and two nights because my MIL does holiday dinners at about 9pm and we just left the girls sleeping there and picked them up in the morning). It was great. H and I got to spend some time alone together and - most importantly - we got to sleep! I'd say we have had probably 6-8 nights away (always one night at a time) since they were born.
The girls also go to my ILs house almost every Sunday for a few hours. H and I both work full-time, but I don't feel guilty for one second about it. It's an opportunity for us to go run errands, clean the condo, or just grab lunch and catch a movie. It's just a few hours but it's great. It allows my ILs to see them every week and the girls are very close with them as a result, and it allows H and I some time to get chores done and/or spend some time together. For us, it's all about balance.
That being said I don't think I could do a vacation away from them at this point. I don't judge those who do, but even when they spend one night away I definitely miss them and am happy when we pick them up. I could do a weekend, but not more then that.

Jen I agree 100% with you on this. C stays with my parents at least once a month. It's not that I don't want to spend time with her. I love spending time with her. They love spending time with her and she gets to bond with them and the other cousins. C gets so excited when we get to their house. They have a play room and she will wiggle out of my arms and race back there as soon as she says hi to Poppa. She loves it. She actually sleeps better over there too. I get 1 day to sleep in and do whatever we need to get done done. She spent both nights over there last weekend and she is spending the night tonight. We are trying to get some painting done in the house and it is a lot easier to do without her "helping". Also I changed my work hours so I get off at 3 every day and noon on Fridays so I could spend even more time with her during the week.

I love my daughter more than anything but I also believe a strong bond with grandparents is important. Maybe it's the way I was raised. I spent most weekends with my dad's parents and a month every summer with my mom's grandparents. I loved my grandparents and they passed away it was like losing a parent. That bond was very strong and very beneficial. I learned a lot from my grandparents, how to grow orchids, family history, how to swim, family recipes, etc. I want C to have the same relationship with her grandparents. I don't think it makes me a bad parent or show that I don't love my child, it shows I know that their are other people that love her and can teach her things I can't.

danac2010 · January 2013

NatnDyl:
Jen0204:

NatnDyl:
My confession is that I feel broken. I've been seeing a counselor once or twice a month for about 2 years. I've been off and on prozac for about a year. I don't feel like any of it does anything. I swear I'm having the same 5 conversations over and over on a loop. Also my parents think that mental health stuff isn't real and I'm just being dramatic and I should just pull it together. Thanks Mom and Dad! I'm so frustrated that I can't just be. I just want to get through the day like everyone else.

I'm sorry you feel that way Have you been seeing the same counselor? Maybe a new one and/or a different medication would help?

Yeah the same counselor. I should try to switch, but he has odd hours which make it so I don't have to take time off work. I feel like just quitting going and muddling through myself. Everyone has some degree of anxiety in their life and maybe I'm stronger than I think.

I had to switch counselors. Mine kept saying I was bi-polar but I didn't have any of the signs of bi-polar. I went to a new one and they are saying it's just PPD or depression. I was on Xanax before getting pregnant and I do believe I have some PPD but I never once thought it was bi-polar. I understand the hours but please try and find someone else if you can. It can be a lot to handle on your own.

Jen0204 · January 2013

NatnDyl:
Yeah the same counselor. I should try to switch, but he has odd hours which make it so I don't have to take time off work. I feel like just quitting going and muddling through myself. Everyone has some degree of anxiety in their life and maybe I'm stronger than I think.

Be careful with this. My sister has severe anxiety and one of my good friends has suffered from depression her whole life. Both of them are downright unbearable, and quite frankly, dangerous, when they are not on medication. I strongly believe that anxiety and depression are just like other ailments and sometimes people need medication to help regulate their body, just like others need insulin or high blood pressure meds, or whatever else. That's nothing to be ashamed of at all. Why is it that an imbalance in our brains is something that people are made to feel bad about, but other imbalances in our bodies are no big deal? I would definitely look into a new counselor or medication before giving up on it. Maybe you could find a counselor who could do sessions over the phone?

redheadscu · January 2013

SY Smiles:
I am in the middle of my shift and just took a break to go pick up food because I hadn't eaten much today (not nice on a 10 week old pregnant belly.) Well, I got back to work and checked my bag to find 3 sets of plasticware. Yep. I ordered so much that they thought I was 3 people.

Surprise I didn't know you were expecting again! Must've missed the announcement. CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!

Jlobebe2012 · January 2013

Jen you give such good advice. I was just about to type a similar response and then I scroll down and read yours.

NatnDyl:

Mental health is nothing to be ashamed about. Unfortunately we live in a society that is ignorant to the science behind chemical imbalances and a society that is very judgmental. Nobody would judge a diabetic for seeing an endocrinologist regularly and picking up an Rx for insulin to control blood sugar, yet people are quick to judge a schizophrenic for seeing a therapist regularly and picking up an Rx for Risperdal to control their dopamine levels.

I applaud you for recognizing your current treatment is not working. You have to be your own advocate and find a better therapist with a better plan, for you and for your family. You deserve it! I am sorry your therapist is not doing a better job and is not recognizing and catering to your needs.

NatnDyl · January 2013

Ugh, I didn't mean to make FFFC heavy guys. Let me try again:

I let Connor eat cheese popcorn and Christmas cookies. But I wouldn't let MIL feed any to him because I don't want everyone to know I let him eat junk food. In my defense, he did eat his vegetables first!

Shmogan09 · January 2013

It is so interesting for me to read the "leaving the baby" debates because (like bfing) I have now been on both sides. With Logan I would actually cry real tears leaving him for a few hours. I left him overnight at around 10 months and cried for a good half an hour of the drive. I don't know what it was, it was like I felt like my arm was missing when he wasn't with me. (I also think that was a SAHM thing cause I was literally never away from him)

Now with Kellen I have realized that it is important to remember that you are someone when you are not with your children. DH has a work party tomorrow from 2-8pm and we are choosing to have my parents keep the kids at their house overnight. I NEVER would have done that with Logan, I just now know how to enjoy my time away from them and realize that before I know it I will be back to full time mommy.

I can't side eye either opinion because I have experience both, but I will say to the ladies who get anxiety over leaving or just don't want to that it won't last forever and it is okay to enjoy it when you do feel ready.

Shmogan09 · January 2013

Nory and Shortsweet... thank you so much. I was actually afraid to get up today that this thread was going to be flooded with flaming at me for throwing a plate at the wall.

Yeah Nory, I had a long talk with him about how I should not have acted that way and that it had nothing to do with him because my actions are my own responsibility and no matter what someone does it is not okay to act poorly. Then we talked about how we can get along better. I think he understood but I still feel crappy Sad Thanks for the kind words though, does make me feel better. I never thought I would be a mom who lost it like that, but man does this kid know how to push my buttons!

HattieLove · January 2013

Jessicameron:
Ok I thought of one; thanks MrMrsandBaby!
I will preface this by saying I don't think spanking is going to solve all the world's problems, and it is probably something we will avoid at all costs.
HOWEVER when I hear an anti-spanker say something like, "we plan to calmly sit down and talk about it," or, "I will walk away and come back when I can speak to him calmly," I laugh my butt off at you. Seriously. There will come a time where you cannot remain calm, and I am NOT saying you will spank in that moment, but I kind of hope you have to sit on your hand not to. Just for being so dang sure about your calm self. I really do love you all though and I hope you stick to your guns and don't spank if that's your choice. Smiley face!

The way I see it, I don't need to restrain myself from hitting anyone else in my life. For example, I lived with my sister for the first eighteen years on my life. I would sometimes get really frustrated and hit her when I was little. My parents taught me that hitting was wrong. At first I had to stop myself from hitting her, but then I stopped having that urge all together. Now it would never even cross my mind to hit anyone. This all happened before I turned ten. It will never cross my mind to spank my child.

That being said, I agree with what you said about remaining calm. I certainly cannot promise that I will always remain calm. I am 100% certain that I will not. But spanking is not and will never be an option in our family.

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