Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
noryang
member
And no. That is not my confession. Here is my confession...
Re: FFFC
My family is a Foreign Service family. Families like mine are posted in every corner of the globe. We live our lives away from family, friends and the conviences and comforts of home. We often live and work in dangerous places among those that misunderstand our intentions and purposes. Sometimes members of our ranks sacrifice our lives to further diplomacy. Please remember that we serve too. And I'm always open to questions.
1. I hate hate hate one of my closest friends' husband. I love her, but I find that I don't want to go see her or invite them to anything because he just grates on my nerves. He has never done anything directly to me (besides "forget" to add me to the only mass text sent out when their baby was born, which resulted in me finding out on facebook) but his posts on fb and the way he treats her just make me not like him. I should be more accepting because he is her problem, not mine, but I just can't get over it.
2. I lost my cool with Logan the other day when he hit me and I threw a plate at the wall! I threw it in the opposite direction of him, and Kellen was asleep but... ugh, it was the worst mommy moment ever. He is still mad at me for breaking his santa plate
He has just been such a little sh!t lately and I honestly feel like it saved me from hitting him back.
Try not to be too hard on yourself. Everyone loses their cool once in a while and the action that you did take was an expression of your frustration and probable exhaustion. I bet you can turn it into a learning experience for your son with some honest conversation.
I can honestly say that Logan is lucky to have a mom like you. Ok. so you took it out on a plate. Better a plate then him - anyday of the week. And the fact that you feel terrible about it is really important. I am willing to bet that you have had a long talk with him to help him understand what happened too.
My family is a Foreign Service family. Families like mine are posted in every corner of the globe. We live our lives away from family, friends and the conviences and comforts of home. We often live and work in dangerous places among those that misunderstand our intentions and purposes. Sometimes members of our ranks sacrifice our lives to further diplomacy. Please remember that we serve too. And I'm always open to questions.
He returned with a bag of marshmallows. I lost it and started cracking up. He got mad at me for laughing because it made him feel stupid. My confession is I knew he would feel that way, but I didn't care. It was too funny!
I use sex as a manipulating tool to get DH to do more around the house. I am sure he knows but he never mentions it. It works wonders.
just wanted to say that I love your ecard siggy! But where did your ticker go? That's the only way I know exactly how old Alex is, since they have the same bday!
I can't understand why it is such a big deal to leave your LO for a night. If you don't have family or someone to watch LO then ok, that I can see...but I just can't understand why it is so hard for some moms (on this board and IRL)?
DH and I have been away three nights and honestly, I loved it! Sleeping until 8:00, not worrying about MOTN wake ups...and Allison had a ball with my parents, she slept better there than she does at home.
If you haven't done it yet...I highly recommend it.
I really have no desire to leave Asher. Plus, I'd have to pump and I hate pumping. I'd rather feed him. I'm sure I'll be ok with it someday but for now, I don't want to be away from him. Maybe that's weird. I don't know.
What does it stand for?
Not weird at all! I don't WANT to be away from Allison either, but I have been and it was NBD when all was said and done. It just baffles me that some people (I have one friend in particular) who makes it seem like it will be the end of the world if she leaves for a night...and I have heard stories of people not being able to do it, having to go home early, etc...I just don't get it.
Goodbye Cruel Bump
Um, yeah. All of this.
I agree. I did even when I was nursing.
Eta fixed
my kid eats McDonald's nuggets and fries.
I thoroughly enjoy sending cooper to stay the night with my parents. They are the only ones he will be staying the night with for a LONG time.
I will be turning the carseat around at a year. He screams. Nonstop. Every car ride.
I came to this board to escape the cliques of my IRL friends but honestly I find it to be just as bad.
I could care less to ever have sex again. Until August when we start TTC.
Since having Cooper, I despise my job of taking care of other people's children. Especially when I am a daycare director and my own son cannot attend.
I was at the store when I saw a mother and her babe.
She asked how old mine was, then I asked how old hers was.
I was surprised when she told me 9 1/2 months, because she had her child in the infant carrier on top of the cart.
Seems really unsafe to me...
Not much of a confession but maybe I can think of something better later.
I'm the same way! And if I *have* to be down there, I get up the stairs faster than ANYONE when I'm done! Lol.
I'm pretty sure I have issues though because the thought of leaving him overnight makes me almost have an anxiety attack. On the other hand, we have friends that leave their baby (who is 3 months younger than our babies) at least one night every weekend with his grandparents. Both parents work fulltime so it's not like they are with him all week. I think that's too much.
I'm pretty sure the issue revolves around the spanking part, and I think the spanking debate has been covered here before. Just like everything else in parenthood, there are some people for it, and some people against it. It's also just one of those issues that people seem very passionate about, and, like politics or religion, it is highly unlikely anyone is changing their mind about it.
Ironically, I don't really care about spanking one way or the other...I love it because I think the participation trophy phenomenon is insane and has run its course. enough already...not everyone wins.
ETA: And if you don't think it is funny, then clearly you don't have a sense of humor!
ME TOO!! I know I have to go down there today. I need to get this laundry done so I can finish packing for vacation. I'm going to have to work up the courage to just do it!
I did it. It was me.
I let the dogs out.
For me, I feel like I don't get to see him enough with working full time. I really cherish our time together, not to say you don't, and I hate to be away from him when I don't HAVE to. I do work weird hours and sometimes 6 days a week so I might not see him as much as other working moms.
??? What am I missing?
Ok I thought of one; thanks MrMrsandBaby!
I will preface this by saying I don't think spanking is going to solve all the world's problems, and it is probably something we will avoid at all costs.
HOWEVER when I hear an anti-spanker say something like, "we plan to calmly sit down and talk about it," or, "I will walk away and come back when I can speak to him calmly," I laugh my butt off at you. Seriously. There will come a time where you cannot remain calm, and I am NOT saying you will spank in that moment, but I kind of hope you have to sit on your hand not to. Just for being so dang sure about your calm self. I really do love you all though and I hope you stick to your guns and don't spank if that's your choice. Smiley face!
DAMN YOU! I expect you to come clean up my backyard now....
Did you spank the monkey too?
Me too. I have found giant spiders in our basement. I hate that our laundry is in the basement.
My confession: I think I'm going to play hooky from work today. I only have to be in for an hour and a half. I haven't seen my husband since before New Year's, and I would much rather spend the day with him. So I'm gonna.
Melodic Insomniac
These kind of outfits for little girls are so ugly. If I had a girl, I would never put her in something like this, mainly the pants.
I could have written this myself! I know exactly how you feel. It is starting to hurt our friendship because I figure the best way to avoid telling him off is to avoid him all together. This means fewer visits to see her, and her DD 4 months older than mine.
BFP #1 1/11/11 M/C 2/4/11
BFP #2 6/13/11 Baby E born 2/18/12
BFP #3 12/3/12 C/P 12/5/12
BFP #4 2/10/13 Baby R born 10/19/13
Dare I ask what is a french shower?