It seems to be trending right now... what do you think about it?
I like it, but I'm far too frilly for it! I have to have a girly-girl name. I do like the name Kacie and I've been told Kendall is boy's name which I thought was girly sounding.
My friend has a coworker who named her baby girl Wesley and I know a little baby girl named Dylan. A lot of celbs are doing it to. What are your thoughts?
Re: boy names as girl names
I don't like it.
As a teacher, I hate not knowing if the student coming into my room is a boy or girl. One of my requirements when we named our little girl was that she had a definitively girly name!
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I wouldn't say it's trending right now necessarily since Stacy, Kelly, Ashley are all traditional male names. It's been a thing for a long time
I think there are names that are masculine and should stay masculine (David, Michael, Adam, Kevin, Bruce, Stephen, Maxwell, George off the top of my head)
And names that are feminine and should stay feminine.
And a wide berth in the middle of names that are gender neutral. Trendy popular names tend to skew both directions while classics (hopefully) stay in one category or another.
I tend to dislike trendy names, so I tend to dislike these names in general, but I have a Schuyler and a Sasha on the way, both girls with boys names, so I obviously don't have a problem with it
I think it all depends on the name
There are common unisex names that I like for girls- Robin, Taylor, etc...and there are even some traditionally masculine names that just sound so soft I prefer them for girls.
but the total boy names like Maxwell, Wesley, Devin, etc...I do not like at all. I have a memory of meeting a woman, with really short hair, tall stature, and flat-chest, with a masculine name and not being sure how to greet her because I wasn't sure if she was a man or a woman and it was very awkward because it was a professional setting. I'm sure I embarrassed her, and not just myself.
I do LOVE masculine family names for middle names. But the whole idea using them for first names just isn't unique anymore and now just seems tired.
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I do like it- because I think it will provide a girl with a sense of independence. Sometimes our society is too gender focused and I think a masculine name would help a daughter to disconnect from the frilly girl things or embrace them as she wishes to do so...
My favorite cross gender names are:
- Ryyan/Ryan, Jordan, Charlie, Erin/Aaron/Aerin/Aeryn, and Rae/Ray
Boy names on girls is nms. When I think of naming my child, I would be fearful of my child getting teased. Some little girls may not have the confidence of pulling it off. Why do that when there are so many nice girl names? I don't think I will ever get the reasoning behind that.
Furthermore I get annoyed when parents act like the boy name they gave their girl is unisex when it really isn't. Own up to it. U named your precious little girl a boys name. Just because other parents starting naming their little girls let's say Maxwell, doesn't make Maxwell unisex. It's still a boy's name that became trendy on girls.
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The problem with this is that once a name has been used often enough for a girl, it just becomes a girl name, frills and all. Think of names like Aubrey, Ashley, Kelly, Shannon, Courtney, Leslie, Evelyn, Vivian, etc... it's difficult to even picture those on a boy anymore. So it defeats the whole "purpose."
When boys names are used on girls for the purpose of detaching from femininity, the message you're sending is that feminine is not good enough, masculine is better. You even said yourself that a masculine name would provide a sense of independence-- why can't a feminine name do the same? You're perpetuating the stereotypes, which is exactly what you claim to be against. I'd rather teach my daughter that there is nothing wrong with being a girl and that you don't have to have a male name to be taken seriously in the world.
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By naming your child a boy name because you think it will give her "independence" is actually being "gender-focused" to me. I find it really sad that you think this way.
A girl can be independent and powerful and feminine or masculine with any name at all. They don't need a feminine name to be a girl or a masculine name to feel powerful.
I do think there is something empowering, however, with a name that is not immediately recognizable as either gender. With a resume or college app or in a professional setting a person is more likely to be judged on their accomplishments and skills without pre-conceived gender connotations.
I find it a bit sad that people are so anti gender name sharing. I personally don't like very strongly masculine names like Maxwell on a little girl, but I don't think it makes your son any less of a boy to share a name with a girl.
People get really worked up over girls "stealing" boys names, like God Forbid, your little boy is going to share his name with a girl. I just find it sexist that there is such fear about boys names "crossing over" that it sends the wrong message. Girls have girls names and boys have boys names. It's so arbitrary. Some names, to me at least, work just fine for either gender, and it's no big deal.
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Truly curious, do you feel this way about girl names on boys? That maybe naming a little boy a "unisex" name that leans feminine like Ashley will help him disconnect from the super boyish things like toy guns?
Because, to me, a person's demeanor isn't defined by their name. I know a tomboy named Annabel and a "princess frilly" girl named Riley. I don't think the name really predicts a disconnect from gender stereotypes. Plus, I don't think femininity is a negative thing. I was proud to give my daughter a very traditional, classic, feminine name. I in no way, shape, or form think it means she will be unable to be a strong professional in life.
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THIS!
Some names are unisex and perfectly fine for a girl like Peyton, Avery, Ryann, or Kasey.
I think there is a bigger stigma when people give their sons names that are popular girls names that were once traditionally boys names like Aubrey (I know a guy with this name), Shannon, Kim, Tracey or Ashley. etc
I grew up with girl named Kyle. She didn't have the self-esteem to carry a name that was unisex. No one else knew of a girl named Kyle and she had a hard time with it.
As the mother of a Francis, I agree with you on that point. We chose a traditionally male name that crossed over long ago, but there are many strong male role models with this name for our son to look up to. Technically it is unisex, but there is nothing wrong with being a girl, sharing a name with a girl, or liking "girl" things. I don't worry about the "stealing" from the boys as much as I despise the message that is sent to a son or daughter that a girl name is not worthy of being used. That is sexist.
Erin and Aaron are NOT the same name FFS. Maybe depending on the region they may sound the same (although not where I live) but that doesn't make them interchangeable.
I agree. My point is the tone of posts like these tends to be, in my opinion at least, that when girls use boys names, the name gets "sissified" and is no longer worthy of being used for a boy. The message that a name is too girly to be used on a boy is just as bad as the message that girl's names aren't good enough.
Sorry, that makes zero sense.
OP- I don't like the trend.
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I love boy names on girls and the "traditional" boy names that have been turned to girl names (Ashley, Audrey, Courtney, etc) for boys.
However, as someone who works with kids and inadvertently housed a Robin in the girl's dorm, I don't think I can do that to a kid. When I hear a kid's name on roll call, I need to know two things: 1. whether they are a boy or girl and 2. how to spell their name.
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Very well put! I couldn't have said it better myself!
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I agree with you. It IS just as bad, but the reality is that that is what generally happens. Not liking something doesn't make it less true.
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Your daughter can do that with out having a mans name! I think opposite of you do in the way that the world is SO feminised nowadays! A woman should be a woman, not a man and a man, a man. She can be independent, absolutely, and she can do things that are stereotyped as "boy things" but, I think it is important for us to teach our daughters that she is a woman, or going to be a woman, and she should act like one and know exactly what that is and what it means to be a woman. The same for men! If men acted like men and were taught how to be like they used to, divorce rates and the meaning or marriage, among many other things that I won't get into, would not be what they are right now...I partly blame exactly what you said on this trend. "My girl can do everything boys can including having a boy name..take that men!" Men and women are different, are meant to be different and it should be embraced, not watered down. Sorry for the rant! I could go on forever about this lol.
I hate it.
And I speak from personal experience. I have a boy's nickname for a FN. Think Jimmi, Tommie, Bobbi, etc. It hasn't been cute or empowering. It's mostly been a PITA. When I turned 18, I got a nasty letter from the Selective Service because I hadn't registered and I've had problems getting official records correct - either spelling or gender. Even my high school diploma was wrong. And the questions & comments have continued through my entire life.
My children will have gender specific, easy to spell names.
Aaron is a Biblical name-- it was the name of Moses's brother and means "exalted." It drives me crazy that people think Erin and Aaron are interchangeable as well. Though, I grew up in Massachusetts so I never even knew that some people pronounce the names exactly the same until this board.
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2/2010: Partial left ovarian torsion
10/2012: SA = Low Motility
11/2012: Surgery #5 to remove scar tissue & paratubal cyst
HSG: Right tube blocked; unable to clear
Lol! You sound very passionate on this topic.
Although it doesn't anger me that much because it's their kids, I do agree that it is so annoying and I would rather my daughter share her name with girls in her class before I give her a boy's name. It's like the parent is trying to hard or something.
I can just see 10-15 years from now and little girls will be named Jackson.
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Freakenomics proved that a resume with a strongly African American name will get passed over more often than an identical resume with a "white" name. It is conceivable that a feminine name on a resume in a male-dominated field could receive the same bias (and vs.versa) making it advantageous, in certain situations at least, to have a gender neutral name. Not that's it's "right" just a fact, and I disagree that it's "hiding who you are". Your name doesn't and shouldn't define who you are. If your Asian, but don't have a traditionally Asian name, that doesn't mean your hiding your ethnicity any more than having a gender neutral name is "hiding" your sex
I think there's nothing wrong with boys and girls being different, we ARE different in so many ways. I agree, it's not cool to pretend gender differences don't exist, because they do. But wearing pink doesn't make you a girl and liking dolls doesn't make you a girl and having a girl's name doesn't make you a girl. Names are just another superficial way of defining gender. You can like what you like about a name, totally your prerogative, but I personally see nothing wrong with a boy named Avery or a girl named Dylan. I also like some super-masculine and super fem names too on their respective genders.
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This! 100%
I don't understand either of you. So what if a girl wants to be frilly and wear pink and sparkles? Or if she wants to participate in a man dominated field and compete "with the boys?" Neither of these things are liabilities.
Give your child a strong name, and teach them to be kind, strong people, regardless of whether they do so in heels or work boots.
I will also tell you that I have a very feminine name that is easily dated and was very popular the year I was born. The only time it has been a liability is when I worked in a female dominated position.