I was speaking with my lawyers admin today and she mentioned that she was a BM, so I asked her if I could ask a personal question. I wanted to know if she had an open or a closed adoption. She told me that it had started open but after some time the AP's decided to close it. I told her I was sorry about that and that it must be hard, but here was her thoughts. "I am grateful for the AP's that took my daughter because I didn't want her to grow up like I did without knowing where her next meal was going to come from. I grew up dirt poor. They were really a blessing to me and I know my daughter is being well cared for (now 7). The AP's probably decided to cut off contact with me because I was being too pushy. I came from a military family and was brought up with very strict rules and I was trying to influence their parenting. BM's need to remember once the TPR is signed you know longer have the authority to make decisions for your child, but there should be nothing wrong with providing some suggestions."
I was impressed that even though the AP's closed the adoption she is still beyond grateful for the life they are providing their daughter and she also knows that if they ever need her, she will be more than willing to be available, but she does understand that she probably crossed the line. I have so much respect for this woman and all BM's.