Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
sweetsunnyc
member
Re: Working right up until day of delivery
The problem with taking time off "before the baby comes" is that unless you're getting induced, that day is completely unpredictable. One week of pre-baby leave based on an EDD could turn into three weeks in the case of a 42 week pregnancy, and vacation/maternity leave policies vary between employers/states. So yes, you should check with HR what your workplace policies are.
Personally, I think it's nice to have the distraction of work & people to interact with during that final stretch of pregnancy. Sure, it gets old with everyone asking when you're due -- but in terms of staying physically & mentally active, it's definitely a good thing. If I were to do it all again, I'd continue to work up until "labor day." What I don't understand is what on earth these pregnant women who take pre-maternity leave are doing all day. Unless you're on bedrest, I don't see a good reason for it. There's plenty of time for cleaning or making freezer meals after work and on the weekends.
i worked until my due date (a friday). i was planning on going in on monday, but went into labor instead. i could have taken off early, but it would have counted towards my 12 weeks off, and i wanted as much time off after delivery as possible.
edit - i should say, the time prior to delivery counting towards my 12 weeks was due to my job situation, and may not have been in line with what is allowed with FMLA. i didn't want to take off any more time than possible b/c i was a resident when i had my baby - more time off translated into a later date that i could graduate from residency.
Can't use FMLA until you go into the hospital (or have other medical reason).
Mine worked out great. I really wanted a few days to relax at home before baby. With DD, I think I worked at the office until maybe Weds. before my my due date? Then I worked from home the last few days--great to wrap things up that way--and I felt much better knowing everything at work was totally cleaned up in my office and I could just wrap up loose ends at home and not worry about being out all of a sudden with my office a mess. Her due date was MLK day, so we were off, and then I was allowed to take sick time for the next 2 days and went in for an induction starting Weds. night.
With DS, I worked at work through Dec. 2. He was due on Dec. 3 and I worked from home that day. Worked from home the next week PT until I went into labor (He was a week overdue!).
I LOVED having some time off and would love to get some again. I'm tentatively planning on working from home and/or taking some days without pay in week 39. Don't understand the people who would be bored at home pre-delivery! Also, my babies have all been winter in Wisconsin babies and I have a long commute--it was just so much easier not having to worry about driving in the snow and ice, and I could wear whatever I wanted. Was able to take naps, get a pedicure, do last-minute baby things, wrap gifts for Christmas, etc.
My plan was to work up until the time I went into labor. I did not want to use any of my maternity leave to be at home without the baby. I would have had to use vacation time or not get paid at all. My last day of work was July 3rd, my water broke July 4th and I had her July 5th.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Went into labor at work. Drove home. Hung out all day. Called DH and then finally when I couldn't take it anymore we headed to the hospital.
I refused to waste any of my 14 weeks off pre-baby.
I worked past 41 weeks. My induction date was a scheduled for a Wednesday at 41.5 weeks so I took off Mon & Tues to rest up. Ended up going into labor late Tuesday night (thank goodness!)
I didn't use more leave than this bc I wanted to conserve it to use with my baby.
My BFP Chart
Both my kids were born on a Monday. I worked the Friday preceeding with both kids.
I worked on a Friday and my water broke at 3 the next morning with ds. With dd, I worked on the Monday and she was born early Tuesday morning.
I was induced at 41.5 weeks and the last 10 days pre baby were pretty boring. I was climbing the walls and constantly refreshing my work email. If I had it to do over again, I would still take the extra time off though. Pros outweighed cons. If I weren't in California I imagine I'd feel terrible about using 3.5 weeks of leave before baby arrived.
I worked until I delivered. I was 8 days early.
I delivered on Sunday and worked on Friday. FMLA did cover time off.
Yep, I worked all the way up until delivery. I actually went into labor on Thursday morning and had worked and volunteered at church the night before.
Most times FMLA will kick in once you go out on leave, so if you take time before the baby is born, you'll get less time after (unless your state grants extra time). I preferred to use my leave to spend with the baby.
With #1 I took off about 2 weeks early and thank goodness I did because DD came a week early! I started working PT at the time so I ended up not having to use any sick days, FMLA, disability, etc.
With #2 I was back to working FT and had very little sick days so I worked until I gave birth. I used up all my sick days and then did disability so I could stay out for 6 weeks. We couldn't afford to use FMLA so I could stay out longer. I had to go back to work.
Right up to delivery both times.
First time, I went on leave on Friday and my water broke the following Monday night.
Second time, baby was 3 weeks early. I went home from work on Friday and woke up to my water breaking a few hours later.
This time, I would REALLY like to actually have a few days of resting before the baby comes, so I'll probably go on leave at 37 weeks.
Worked until I delivered, both times. Not super easy as you are tired and feel like tar at the end but it's worth it. Some women cannot due to complications, pain, whatever. Just do what works for you!
1st time I was 5 days overdue and was asked multiple times each day 'Oh, you're still here?'. I had gone in for a check up and to schedule an induction when we found my fluid was low and I was being induced that morning. Called the boss and said 'maternity leave starts now'.
2nd time was a scheduled cs. I took a 1/2 day the day before to run some errands (um, baby book shopping) and that was about it.
A friend of ours decided she was done working three weeks before her due date, and ended up delivering a week late (which I think had something to do with it, since she had basically put herself on modified bed rest). I thought that was ridiculous, and she was bored out of her mind.