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Should be excited but scared

lemondoglemondog
in Pregnant after 35

JUST found out I'm pregnant.  At first I was so excited and then quickly became terrified about my age (will be 37 at delivery).  For some reason it just dawned on me how fragile these little people are and how common it can be for something bad to happen...especially after 35.  Ugh!  I took a bath last night and tried to focus on the postive but quickly I began freaking out about getting my hair dyed recently, my serious coffee drinking habit, the alcoholic beverages I consumed on my last weekend trip with my husband.  Ahh!!!!

 I never thought about this stuff with my first child.  I was too concerned about how much my life would change, if I was ready, etc.  It's kind of amazing how self-absorbed my first pregnancy concerns were.  It didn't really occur to me that I should be most focused on having a healthy baby.  Now that I'm older that's all I can think about!

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Re: Should be excited but scared

  • ukmisgirlukmisgirl
    I had my first at 34 a few months before turning 35. I'm now 40 wks and 2 days pregnant with our second, a healthy baby boy, and I'm 43, getting ready to turn 44 in a few weeks. Don't focus on the negative, I haven't, there's no point at all in doing so, some things are out of our control. Just relax and enjoy the next 9mths as best as you can. Congratualtions!!!
    Mom to Hope 2004 Blessed with #2 due to arrive 11/02/12
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  • MangomamaFLMangomamaFL member

    What has been done has been done.  Try not to worry too much what you did before you knew you are pregnant.  Chances are they did not do any harm to your baby.

    I bet you will be careful for the rest of your pregnancy.

     

     

     

    BabyFetus Ticker

    Birth is safe as life gets - Harriette Hartigan

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  • cfitz16cfitz16 member
    No, you'll be fine.  I delivered my daughter at 37 and am thinking about having a third.  All will be fine.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • lemondoglemondog
    Thank you all!  This is helpful and comforting. 
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  • danieleandwaynedanieleandwayne member

    Congratulations!

    If it helps, my RE said that the rule-- not the exception-- is that women 35+ have egg quality issues, not uterus issues. Once the egg manages to get fertilized and does its splitting successfully, women over 35 really don't have any greater risk during the pregnancy than those under 35-- unless they have other health issues that impact the baby. 

    Also-- I can't count on my hands and feet how many women I see in the ED who smoke, continue to take meth, etc. and manage to have kids that survive the pregnancy with only withdrawal and some need for the extra light therapy.

    You're going to be great!

    *********************************************************************************************

    "You have to do your own growing no matter how tall your grandfather was." 
            -- Abraham Lincoln
     

                               Me:39  MH:39 
    DD born 6/1/2013 after 15 months of TTC with one loss.    
    TTC #2: BFP 4/22 but stalled growth and no HB at 9w3d on 5/30        

    <a href="http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/3a2798" style="font-size:smaller;" >
    <br /> My Ovulation Chart</a>
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  • kat1221kat1221 member

    Congrats and welcome! 

    I am 37 and will be 38 when this LO arrives and I feel like a baby on here sometimes!  You are in good company!

    I know it's very hard but try and relax and enjoy this pregnancy because today you are pregnant.  Like the PP said, your baby is fine and people do far worse way later in their pregnancy and they are fine.

     

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  • Trootie2012Trootie2012
    I will be one month Shy of 40 when I deliver my 1st !  It's very scary, but at the same time I do not feel or look 39 - So I am hoping genes are on my side!
    me: 39 DH 40 Trying to Conceive #1 Since Nov. 2010, BFP # 1 1/14/12 EDD 9/20/12 -M/C between 7-8 weeks - :( BFP # 2 10/9/12 EDD 6/16/12 - No Embryo Found 8 weeks 4 day U/S :( Waiting to Miscarry - 9 weeks today Will Try for one more BFP in 2013
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  • NursewillowNursewillow member

    Hi Moms and Moms-to-be! I am 43 and 25 weeks along. I have two teens. Talk about scary! LOL. I often bounce between complete bliss and utter terror at the risks involved with pregnancy at this age. I've had so many tests by fetal specialists I sometimes feel like a science project. All have been good so far and my baby boy is very active. I have had 3 sonograms which seemed excessive but was thrilled to see our baby in 3D. He is beautiful and I know it's all worth it. Try to focus on your happy thoughts. Sounds simple but worry won't help. Our baby was along for the ride unknown to us for a riotous weekend music festival with, yes, alcohol served aplenty. Doc warns not to beat yourself up, won't help. Lot's of women do worse knowingly. I like to think that although my eggs may be older my uterus is more experienced. :) 

    best wishes and warm thoughts for all your Bumps! 

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  • NicoleWINicoleWI member
    37 is nothing! I'm going to be almost 38 when this baby arrives and there are plenty of people on here older than me. Also, lots of people are still drinking, etc. really early on before they know they are PG and sometimes it's so early that nothing even gets to the baby at all. It's usually 100% OK. Good luck with the pregnancy!!
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  • danuli8danuli8 member
    As Danielle said, once the initial splitting occurs, babies tend to be pretty tough little guys and gals. Just do the best you can and don't beat yourself up for what is past. I will be 42 when I deliver (this is my first pregnancy ever) and to be perfectly honest, I feel like it is going really well. I just tune out all that crap about being older. I was quite fit when I conceived and I know it will stand me in good stead.
    image
    Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
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  • GalLauraGalLaura member
    I have been having the same fears. I'm 38 now and will be 39 when I deliver. It wasn't planned and I had my hair dyed, was have drinks and no prenatal vitamins etc. everything I read about pregnancy over 35 is so scary except this message board. So thanks everyone for shAring.
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  • lovelyday39lovelyday39 member

    This is my first and I just turned 40 a week ago. :) (Not that I "feel" forty :)) And I can totally relate to what you're saying. It's like if you're over 35, everyone (media, genetic counselors, PN's) tries to freak you out.

    My thought is, if we weren't meant to be having babies over 35, the equipment wouldn't still work, right? LOL!

    Congrats, GL and here's wishing you a healthy and relaxed 9 mo's!

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  • lemondoglemondog

    Thank you all!  Seriously...it's so nice to hear from others who are in the same boat. 

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