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Parenting
Bateaulover
member
I wish I lived where teen pregnancy isn't embraced
Bateaulover
member
in Parenting
I understand teenagers have sex. I understand on a hot Saturday night (or Wed afternoon or whenever) birth control can fail. But I don't understand how these girls in my town get KU and everyone just pats them on the back, gives them a baby shower, and they never skip a beat. THEY must have parents that are more forgiving than I expect mine would have been. I know that these girls could've chosen abortion (although not easily, as we live in a very rural area), and I also know it is not the baby's fault and we should show love to the child and mom (forgiveness, support). I know this in my head...it just pisses me off to see the girls who are trying to make the right choices (using birth control, planning to go away for college) not get recognized, but Sally Bimbo down the street gets pregnant and its all rainbows, unicorns,and Babies 'R Us registeries. I have thought for a long time about starting a program where we give "Moving Out" showers to the college bound kids and give them some dishes, a vacuum, plastic storage containers, they could register for bedding. Am I crazy?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: I wish I lived where teen pregnancy isn't embraced
So, you are judging teenage girls for not having abortions and you are juding their families for not shunning said teenage girls?
Have I got that right?
You don't think that the girls that go to college realize that they are in a much better place than those teen moms?
You could throw graduation parties. That's customary in my area.
It's a good idea what you are thinking of doing, but like any other cycle it is not going to be easy to stop.
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They're not customary everywhere?
Going to college > being a teen mom. At least for me.
Sounds like the families where you live must love their children unconditionally & are supportive of their children. *gasp!!* Must be horrifying.
What would you rather these parent's do? Deny them showers & force them to buy all their baby's stuff at the thrift store or beg for charitable donations?
Do you know what types of conversations go on behind closed doors between the parents & children involvedin these teen pregnancies?
Where is this rant coming from, anyway? Do you have some backstory or personal issues to deal with?
Nobody should get baby showers.
Allllll parents should pay for alllll baby things.
Parents who can't afford to buy everything for their kids are just bad parents.
Also, bootstraps.
I definitely think that parents of teen moms sometimes go overboard in regards to almost rewarding the child with unconditional support/essentially raising the child themselves so their teen can still be a teen.
With that being said, what is getting angry going to do? It's not going to make the baby disappear for the time being and come back 10 years later. I do think there's a happy medium between disowning your child and raising the kid for them where you provide some level of support yet they are encouraged to be the person who's truly responsible for the child.
As a person who chose college and delayed parenthood until I was truly ready to be a parent, I don't feel like society didn't acknowledge my hard work. I don't think I needed a "moving out" shower to acknowledge that.
I mentioned the abortions because when I *** about this to people IRL, they say, "well, at least she didn't get an abortion."
I think that an off to college shower sounds great.
I also think a baby shower for a teenager sounds great. Why sould the mom and baby not have things they need just like an adult mom and her baby? That makes no sense. A life is a life and no matter what it should be celebrated. Birth control does fail and an "oops" can happen to anyone. Assuming every teenager should have an abortion is just stupid.
I see I could have left out Sally Bimbo. I stand corrected.
Are you for real?
Also graduation parties aren't a common practice across the US?
I'm still not convinced a "moving out" shower for the college bound kids is the best thing to do.
Part of the "college experience" is having to buy your own cheap-ass appliances at Target so you can adequately reheat the post-drinking binge Hot Pockets.
I actually like the idea of your Moving Out shower but where I come from, we do that at a high school graduation party.
I don't think people are celebrating what happened but rather, accepting what has happened and trying to celebrate the new LO while giving the teen mom the best start that they can. Those women are going to have it hard enough for the rest of their lives. There is no reason to punish them.
Burned by the Bear
Bimbo, so 80's... lol
For a sec I read Bumbo....
I think your first paragraph sums up what I am feeling. Also, finding a happy medium between providing support and encouraging them to be truly responsible for the child. Its sad to me when so many of these children of teen moms are raised by granny while mom does what she wants.
I thought this would give us food for thought this PM!
The teen moms eat skittles, don't they?
Whores.
HA! And I agree with you earlier that college isn't the answer to everything. I just wish these girls could look to the future a little bit more.
Nothing much, what's up with you?
That's granny's fault for making that choice.
LOL, is that what you think your OP is?
Well, like you said in your OP, sometimes birth control fails. Sometimes girls get pregnant on purpose. Sometimes they're just dumb kids and think "that can't happen to me."
No need to paint an entire age group with the same brush, though.
The one I saw the other night was having a bag of Reese's Pieces.
You just said ***.
ISWYDT.
Nah, just trying to get some good old fashioned opinions going back and forth.
So the bump likes their *** big!!!!
ETA Wait, how did you do that??