So here's where we are

ellekae · October 2012

Sorry I have been a bit MIA around here lately. We are just in such a weird place with everything. We met with a social worker in the IA program last week, and we feel pretty good about moving forward with our discussion of the China special needs program. We have a few obstacles to overcome before we can officially switch and hope to be accepted to the program:
1. DH has to turn 30, and that doesn't happen until June.
2. We need to find a way to get our net worth up to the required level. With my grad school debt, we have a bit of saving or fundraising to do to get there.

We told my family this weekend about the potential change, and they were very positive and supportive. I have no desire to tell DH's family anything until it is finalized since MIL is sure to have thoughts that I do not want to hear.

Sigh. I thought I knew what we were doing, and now I feel like I am drowning in confusion!

Allie-Jo · October 2012

Good luck with everything! That is so exciting!

That's gotta be frustrating about the age thing...that's a small part of the reason we doing DIA, because both DH and I are so young (24) we only qualified for 2 countries and didn't feel a pull to either. Hope the next 8 months go by quickly and you get some good fundraising in before then!!!

DaisyZH · October 2012

I'm also interested in the China special needs program but with the income and age restrictions we aren't even close to qualifying. It looks like a great program, and at least while you wait you can fundraise and research. Correct me if I'm wrong but I believe when I looked at it the wait time is about a year or so, so at least it's on the shorter side compared to some countries I've seen.

I hope your MIL and DH's side of the family handle it well - I know it can be hard when people are resistant, just keep your head held high and know in your heart that you are acting on behalf of your family. As much as extended family support is wonderful, you are the ones that will be walking this path every day - plus hopefully when you get your sweet little one home they will fall in love and forget all about any objections they had.

kimmyb1020 · October 2012

I'm new, but wanted to add that we are looking into the China special needs program as well! It seems like a really solid program with a shorter wait time than others I have seen.

Good luck with your next steps!

ellekae · October 2012

Our agency has estimated the wait time at 12-18 months, but it depends on the specific needs that you are open to and whether or not you have gender preference.

Thanks for the support, ladies. This whole thing is overwhelming!

srmmm09 · October 2012

a) I LOVE your pics of ButterBean. She is soooooocute.

2) we have friends who adopted from China SN program and had their child home (from application-home) in 14 months. That is NOT bad for IA, know what I'm sayin!

III) The 30 rule drives me crazy. But it is good that it gives you another reason to have time to amass funds/pay down debt than your net worth not being high enough. If it's only 1 thing keeping me from moving forward, I always hate it more, rather than if it's a couple things, you know?

Either way, MIL can deal with it in time.

coriet · October 2012

I just want to wish you luck!

I totally hear you about MILs. My MIL is not fancy with the idea of us fostering to adopt at all. I wish hubby hadn't told her!

IRR · October 2012

Best of luck with your new direction.

JellyTwoPointO · October 2012

Good luck with everything! It's a bummer to wait on certain things, but it sounds like it's all coming together to help you get prepared. You can do the saving and fundraising while the clock ticks by for your husband. :-) I hope it goes well!

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