I did the gender pee test a few weeks ago and it said it was a girl, although had many disclaimers that it is just for fun. Well, I secretly wanted a little girl and had a name set in stone. Then, I had my 16 week ultrasound yesterday and the tech said I can go ahead and buy paint for the nursury because she is sure it is a BOY!
I am wrestling with feeling like a total jerk today because I am not greatful enough just to have a healthy baby. I am still super excited, don't get me wrong, just nervous as heck now. I feel like I would know what tto do with a girl, but have no idea how to raise a boy. I do not like rough housing, but do not want to raise a wussy boy. My MIL assures me that it will come naturally, and to stop worrying and to just focus on the good stuff, like choosing a name and decorating the nursury.
Can anyone relate? Please tell me I'm not the only one...
Re: What?!?! It's a BOY?!?!?
you are the only one I know that has ever relied on a gender pee test.
I can't help you b/c I don't get gender disappointment.
You took a gender pee test seriously?! Umm, I have no words.
I also don't get what's with the sex of the baby disappointment with people.
I do not yet know if we are having a boy or a girl, but I totally know what you mean. I feel like I have NO idea what I would do with a boy. That is completely untrue, since I have two nephews that I see on a daily basis and I adore them. However, the thought of having my own boy is, honestly, terrifying in my eyes. All the dirt, mud, cars, sports, and roughhousing? Ugh. My two year old nephew is really into making his cars and trains crash or fall off of things. I like quiet and calm. The boys are not either of those things usually. But they are a lot of fun, they give a lot of love, and they are stinking adorable. You will fall head over heels when you meet him I'm sure.
Congrats on your boy!
Those things are about as accurate as the whole spinning the necklaces over the stomach thing.
And yeah, I don't get it either. I understand wanting one or the other, but honestly- I would be just as excited for either.
Good luck. I hope you can learn to accept your son for who he is. Maybe he will be a bit gentler than other boys? Who knows. We are all different. And btw, I don't like rough housing either. My little nephew lived with me for a year.. he is now 4. Guess what? No rough housing. Thats what outside is for. Go kick ass outside, not on my couch. But he has bad manners anyway because my BIL doesn't discipline him or teach him that jumping on the couch at close to 50lbs is not cool anymore. He isn't 2 and 20lbs.
Every old wives tales (including the baking soda pee test) said I would be having a girl. Everyone told me I was having a girl. Then he showed us he is DEF a boy! I wasn't upset but def a little taken back. That lasted about an hour then I was just thrilled to be having a healthy baby (from what tests show thus far).
I guess for me I am just so in love with him already I can't imagine having anything else now. Then again I've had several weeks to adjust and shop for my little guy.
Re-lax! There is a definite difference between girls and boys. Give OP a break.
Lol, I'm sure she did it for fun. I did it twice and both time said boy and was right, but of course did not believe it until my A/S or in this case my 16 week.
OP- Your MIL is right. It will come naturally. I was the same way, and now I couldn't imagine having anyone else, but my son. He is so cuddle and sweet, but a TON of FUN!
True enough.
My wife teaches "Career Technology Education". Aka, she runs the computer lab and teaches wood shop. She is somewhat of a tomboy. She rules.
Don't think my daughter won't be going to ball games with me, fishing with me, or anything like that. She will have every opportunity to if she wants. Or if she decides she wants to be all high maintenance chick and not like "boy" things.. no problem.
Really, all you are promised with the sex is which way you wipe their ass. I just learned with my daughter- front to back. Learn something new every day.
Just remember that you don't have to be everything to your son. Just because he's a boy doesn't mean you have to be all about everything HE is all about. At first boy, girl, they're the same. Even into toddler hood there aren't always a lot of differences but you will learn to be excited about what your son loves because you love him. I picked up a frog for my son because he wanted to see it. I draw the line at snakes and spiders but I find myself doing things for him that I normally wouldn't do. Parents "rough house" with their kids - boys and girls. By the time your son is big enough for practicing football tackles and stuff, he's not going to want to do it with his mom anyway
I'd love to see how you would handle having an effeminate son, or a butch daughter. Gender isn't something you are born with, only the plumbing.
I freaked a little bit when I found out my 1st was a boy. I had dealt with baby girls but never really boys. It actually worked out well because I was out of a job while I was pregnant so I watched my cousins baby boy 1 day a week for her. I got very comfortable with her lil boy and of course when my son got here it was just a natural thing. I love having a little boy and wouldn't trade him for all the girls in the world. Yes, I hope this LO is a girl but if this one is a boy- bring it on! BOYS ROCK!
I'm not huge on the whole rough housing thing either but my son is all boy and is soooo rough. It's all about teaching rules and manners. Honestly, it's super fun to get on the floor and roll around with him, tickle fights, play cars. Everytime my H and my son are on the floor getting into football stances I feel like my heart might burst with love. It's so amazing to see my H and my son play.
Really? Gender IS something you are born with. Nurture has an effect but I believe that gender is inherent. Do you believe that people are made gay, or that they are born that way? I have 2 girls and one boy. Although I do not claim to be an expert, I am wondering what makes you an expert?
People are absolutely born gay. Sexual orientation =/= gender.
I'm not in 2nd this time yet but Please stop this kind of thinking. You raise a boy exactly as you raise a girl. You treat him the same and love him the same. It's scary to hear people afraid of raising a "wussy". Not all boys like rough housing, some girls do.
EDIT I know it can be scary but you'll be fine. Just treat the baby like a baby. Love it and enjoy it, you can't make a baby a "wussy". I have two boys who I raised alone for the most part and they are perfectly fine as teenagers now. Take some time to get used to the idea but try not to worry.EDIT To be clear, these boys both had a doll at one point and although they loved cars and trucks and bugs and frogs they also loved the Little Mermaid, kittens, playing "house", and cuddling.
According to my mom, my older brother was a very calm, mild-mannered little boy. I know one little girl who is a crazy little monkey, climbing all over this and that, dirt all over her, all the time. A friend has one of each, and she says her girl is digging in the yard, and her boy is her little cuddlebug. My little girl is about as girly as they come, but when she had a chance to go fishing, she held the worms and even the fish, and she loved it. I'm very girly, but I flucking hate playing with princess dolls. Your child will be multi-faceted, unexpected, and wonderful. There will be things you love to play with him, and things you don't love. Vagina or penis guarantees you nothing.
(PS, it's "grateful." )
My silly Lily is almost 4.
Your child will be your child. I understand the whole, "I'd love to have a little girl" but seriously, little boys are blessings too... Also, RockyTop is wise He's got good info. It all depends on how you raise your chldren.
LOL, those gender pee sticks are about as reliable as the chinese gender predictor on this website...or as throwing a coin in the air.
I have similar feelings about a boy (I am not sure if I will have as many bonding moments once it gets older because I have never been a sports fan, so if the kid likes sports, I am doomed). However, I can really see positives and negatives to both genders. We are remaining team green so won't get our results for a few months still, but I can honestly say I would be happy with either one. I see boys as being more difficult when they are younger cause they tend to get into more mischief (not all, I know some toddler girls who do that same, that's for sure) and are more energetic/crazy. While I think girls are harder when they're teens because there is more peer pressure/hormones/worrying about looks then boys. Either way, raising kids are tough, but I am excited no matter what!
TTC since March/April 2010
DX: MFI - less than 1 million sperm, 26% motility
DH put on anastrozole to increase counts
June/July 2011 100 mg Clomid + TS IUI#1 & IUI 2 - BFN :-(
Forced break due to DH getting spinal surgery in August 2011
IVF - January 2012: BFN
FET in April 2012 - BFP at 6dp5dt! Beta #1 at 9dp5dt: 82.5, Beta #2 at 12dp5dt: 352 Beta #3 at 19dp5dt: 6000, saw heartbeat and one little bean at 5W6D!
After nearly 3 years of waiting our LO was born December 18th 2012!
I never did one of those gender urine tests because it's not scientifically accurate. There is nothing in your urine that can tell a test if you are having a boy or girl. HCG is the same protein regardless of gender.
Anyway, I can relate to being upset. I was very upset at first about having a girl b/c I had my heart set on a boy. I had convinced myself that I was having a boy and when I was told she was a girl I was devastated. It took a day but eventually I realized how much fun having a girl would be and I wouldn't change a thing. You will get used to the idea too. I promised myself this time I wouldn't over-think it and I haven't so far. Good luck and congrats!
What on earth does homosexuality have to do with gender? I think you're confused.
Some of you on here are spazzing out.
OP-Just be happy your having a baby and that is healthy and when it comes out the cry is strong and loud.
I find out the gender of my baby today and congrats on having a boy! You'll be fine tho, I noticed that babies play with just about anything they can lift (and more) so have fun!
You seem to have the same mindset as my husband. And for that I salute you.
I was raised as the youngest and only girl of 5. My parents were wonderful, but one thing I hated was the random wrestling tournaments that would errupt before dinner. Granted, they happened when my brothers were going through their wrestling phase and eventually my mom limited their brawls to the trampoline, but just the same. Boy (and girls) are products of the parenting they experienced.
For example, DH's family was very calm and he honestly cannot remember his parents arguing in front of the kids or yelling. Ever. So as a result, with our nieces and nephews he is firm, but not one who would raise his voice or anything. I, on the other hand, grew up in a very loud home where it was okay to jump on couches and I definitely saw my parents argue.While I am not so much a fan of kids screaming/running too much in the house, I also know that just because you argue doesn't mean your relationship is on the rocks. Needless to say, arguments in our house are weird.
I am not confused at all. I was trying to point out the error in this poster's thinking, that we are only born with the plumbing. That is not true. And, there IS a definite connection between gender identity and sexual orientation, although it is not always the case. All I am saying is that the world is not as black and white as mabenner1 would like it to be.
So is there a connection between gender identity and sexual orientation, or isn't there? You haven't seemed to make up your mind. My post had absolutely nothing to do with sexual orientation-I was letting OP know that just because someone is born with a vagina, it doesn't mean they are going to be ultra-feminine and into dolls, dresses, and sparkles.
Yes I can relate. Initally I felt the whole time I did not have a preference just a healthy baby. Then when I found out it was a boy I was sad, but I think that was because so many people were hoping we would have a girl. So I think I felt disappointed because other people would be disappointed - especially my Mom and MIL.
After a few days after finding out, I started getting excited and went shopping for my little boy. Now I am really happy and excited and cannot wait to meet my little boy.
ALL of this.
DD (5 years old) from IUI in 2012
TTC 3rd and final!: IUI #1 in progress!
Because you asked if people could relate. The majority of people can not, because what you are thinking is kind of out there. If you want a bunch of ladies to tell you "Oh it is okay", go to babygaga.com. Otherwise, put on your BGP and take what you get when you post on a public message board.
The good thing about little boys is that they know how to be little boys. You just have to kiss the boo-boos and they take care of the rest. (Little girls know how to be little girls too)
You'll be fine, and within 2 minutes of that little guy being born you won't wish you had any other baby.
Have fun picking out baby boy names!
I don't see how my reply was mean. All I said was "ALL of this." But, to answer your question, I replied because the question was "can you relate"...which is a yes or no question. I can't relate so I agreed with a PP. The OP did not say "only reply if you can relate" (which would be ridiculous.). That's the thing about public message boards...anyone can reply to anything they want to.
Sorry you got your panties in a bunch.
You sound pretty confused. Homosexuality has nothing to do with gender. Gay men don't wish they were women. They're men who are attracted to men. You're confusing homosexual for transgender.
OP,
A little gender "disappointment" is normal if you got your heart set on one or the other. It should natural dissolve into affection and excitement for the little one that is coming your way! If it lasts longer, you might want to see a counselor who can help you figure out why it's so upsetting to you.
Some people will be really critical of someone who has severe gender disappointment, but I honestly don't think it has anything to do with how you will be as a parent or how you feel about your child, I think it's honestly something to do with your own psyche and probably some underlying issue that you should see someone about.
You really should know better than to trust any sort of gender predictor that your doctor or an u/s tech doesn't do and even then, an u/s can be wrong.
I'm so happy that you're having a healthy baby boy and I know that you're going to have a great time with him. GL and have a great pregnancy.
Yep, the wiping thing is hilarious. DH did not know this until about a year ago, and his daughter is 10!!! I was like, "did you forget?" because seriously...it's like a tenet of girldom.