vag birth vs C sec...very long!

CnAnA · September 2012

Some of you may remember a couple weeks ago when I posted that doc said I may need a csection because of my weight. I am morbidly obese. Not trying to be harsh on myself, it's just a fact. Plus he is expecting Alice to be a big baby. Probably between 9 and 10 pounds. He mentioned shoulder dysplasia is a complication in big babies.

I have really been pondering the whole csection vs vaginal birth. I am really conflicted.

I am already at a much higher risk for a c section because of my weight alone. I am not sure how much higher of a risk, doc just said "much greater risk for c section." So if I am gonna end up with one anyway, why go through labor?

I am terrified of birth complications. The fact that doc mentioned shoulder dysplasia at all puts the fear of god into me. My nephew almost died because of that. I know some of you ladies have had experience with it as well that didn't turn out with a happy ending.

I know I should trust my body and let it do what it was designed to do. But honestly? I can't. My body has already failed me in one pregnancy. Its not that I am afraid we will lose Alice. Its more that I am not convinced my body will do what its designed to do.

What do I do? Do I ask for a C based on my risk factors and fears? Do I suck it up and take the risk? What if we do go vaginal and something happens? Will I be able to live with myself?

Sorry this is gonna be a bit of a post and run. I am at work. I will respond as I can though.

[Deleted User] · September 2012

You know what I am going to say...Go with your gut. If you really feel more comfortable with a C, it can't hurt to ask and/or at least discuss it as a primary option with your doc.

You know that I was/am faced with the same choice, and personally I would be going with the C if it didn't mean going under GA. As it is, I'd rather do the trial of labor and end up with a c-section than choose a c-section under GA as my first choice. Since you don't have the issue with spinal/epi, it makes your choice a little easier (or harder?).

((hugs)) You have to do what is best for you and Alice!

pumpkinhead4 · September 2012

I think if you don't have your heart set on a vaginal birth, then I would go with the c-section if you are that nervous about complications from attempting a vaginal birth. You could always go through a trial of labor and see how it goes, give yourself a time limit, etc. It's so hard for the doctors to really know how big your baby is going to be. What does your doctor think of your pelvis? They can typically tell at this point if it can accomodate a baby, for example, mine apparently cannot...anyway! Having had a c-section, it's not that bad and especially if you aren't laboring before hand, your recovery might be even easier than someone that has been pushing for hours. Do your research and if your doctor is really advising against a vaginal delivery then you need to trust them, it's a tough decision but in the end you want your baby healthy and safe

roxyttandme · September 2012

Ok. So you and I are pretty close to the same size. Not once in either pg have I been told I am higher risk for c/s. I have been told however a c/s has more potential complications due to my size... but that will be the case with us no matter the surgery. That is my consequence for enjoying all that amazing food and beer throughout the years.

In addition, I'm measuring 45/46 weeks and Charlote is estimated to be 8.8 lbs as of last week. MH and his siblings were all near 10 lbs. I'm thinking you and I are in a similar boat, my love.

I am praying for a vag delivery. There is nothing about a c/s that I want. If the baby is too big, I was told there will be indicators during labor that will push us towards c/s. I'm personally good with that. I'm also 5 ft 9in, so I know my pelvis is larger than most. It is my bone structure. I have faith I can deliver vag. ESP with all those tinker toy bishes that do so while they weigh a buck forty wet and pg..... with twins I'm sure....

Try to take a deep breath and talk it over in more detail in your next appt. sounds like the comments yu got were pretty ambiguous. Get some clarification....

CnAnA · September 2012

Thanks everyone for all your responses. I do plan on hashing this out with Doc at my next two appointments. Honestly, right this second, I would probably choose a c section. But I know that is based out of fear. So we will see how things go at my appt next week.

ktsnshn · September 2012

I am sorry you are facing this decision. It is a tough one. With DS, I had to make the choice for an elective c-section because I was high risk for incompetent cervix with him and because my cervix held up for my whole pregnancy my OB did not want to risk future pregnancies by compromising/weakening my cervix. After much deliberation DH and I decided the C was the best choice for our family. I am happy with our decision and do not mind that I will be having another C for this baby as well. My surgery and recovery were both textbook. I would recommend if you decide on a C, to look at things you can do to help your recovery such as drinking lots of water and moving around as soon as possible. Good luck with your decision.

crystal8503 · September 2012

I'm sorry you are having to make this decision. My only advice would be to talk with your husband and your doctor so you can make an informed decision that will be best for you and Alice - but you are already going to do that.

I know you will select the best route for your delivery, just listen to your instinct. Hugs

MrsRiceARoni · September 2012

roxyttandme:

Ok. So you and I are pretty close to the same size. Not once in either pg have I been told I am higher risk for c/s. I have been told however a c/s has more potential complications due to my size... but that will be the case with us no matter the surgery. That is my consequence for enjoying all that amazing food and beer throughout the years.

In

This is more the impression I was under as well. I've never heard of being over weight as increasing your chances of needing a Csection but I have heard that they increase the risk of complications in a Csection. The increased risk of complications would concearn me more than trying to deliver vaginally with the open mind that it may need to switch to a Csection. As for your daughter being big I know that the u/s sizing can be off in either direction so I don't know if size alone would push me towards a Csection but I also have pretty large hips/pelvis. Do you have a particularly narrow pelvis that is causing your doctor concearn?

Either way I hope you are able to come to a decision that you feel comfortable with, in the end the most important thing is that you do what is best for you and your baby.

CnAnA · September 2012

Silly ladies. I'm not small ANYWHERE. LOL well, anywhere except my boobs...

Mrs.DeliaMarieP · September 2012

As someone who did have a shoulder dysplasia complication with a happy ending, here is my advice to you, and other first time moms facing this decision.

I recommend that you try to let your body attempt a vaginal birth, but don't take the c-section off the table, either. See how it goes, and if things are progressing normally, and baby is tolerating labor well, take it from there. If at some point baby isn't tolerating it well or signs are pointing away from a successful vaginal delivery, just ask for the c-section at that point.

I don't think it's fair to yourself to discount your body completely before you've given it a chance at labor, and I don't think it's a good idea to go straight for a c-section if you've never attempted labor. Who knows, your body may just pop that big 'ole baby right out with no problems! Plus, the weight estimates, are just that, estimates. I've seen plenty of women who were predicted to have 9-pounders have 7-pounders.

Good luck in whichever route you choose, hope she's not as big as they are predicting!

Eveanyn · September 2012

First of all, big (((HUGS))). This honestly all comes down to what you feel comfortable with and what you think is going to keep Alice safe. Just make sure you research your options (don't just talk to your doctor) and that you feel comfortable and informed about your decision. Good luck to you, sweetie.

MrsRiceARoni · September 2012

mrs.ike:
Silly ladies. I'm not small ANYWHERE. LOL well, anywhere except my boobs...

Haha I you for this comment! I am right there with you tho, a big girl with small "girls" it's just not fair is it? Especially since all clothing makers seem to assume that just because you are big that you will be blessed in the bust!

CnAnA · September 2012

MrsRiceARoni:
mrs.ike:
Silly ladies. I'm not small ANYWHERE. LOL well, anywhere except my boobs...

Haha I <3 you for this comment! I am right there with you tho, a big girl with small "girls" it's just not fair is it? Especially since all clothing makers seem to assume that just because you are big that you will be blessed in the bust!

right?! I have pre 60 pound weight loss shirts that I still can't fill out the chest at 9 months pregnant. It's very sad. LOL

blessedhope · September 2012

As you probably know, I lost my son due to a shoulder dystocia delivery. ( i'm assumimg your talking about dystocia as dystocia is when the shoulders become stuck on the mothers pelvis and shoulder dysplasia is something else entirely.) My baby was 10 pounds 2 ounces. (originally estimated to be between 8-9 pounds)

My mother gave birth naturally to my 11 pound brother so, having a big baby does not automatically equal complications but definatlely raises the risk. I think one of the things for you to consider is how much "nicer" planned C-sections are then emergency ones. So, if you are at a higher risk to end up with one anyways it may be easier all around to schedule one, but as you say, there are a lot of pros and cons on both sides.

As for me, with this baby I am having a planned C-section to prevent another dystocia.A dystocia does not occur until the baby's head is already crowning. (although yes, there can be warning signs such as prolonged pushing etc.)A manuever where the baby is pushed back in and delivered by C-section is possible but very risky for both mom and baby.

I know you have a lot to consider and if you ever want to know more about shoulder dystocia you can always pm me.

CnAnA · September 2012

blessedhope:
As you probably know, I lost my son due to anbsp;shoulder dystocia delivery. i'm assumimg your talking about dystocia as dystocia is when the shoulders become stuck on the mothers pelvis and shoulder dysplasia is something else entirely.

yes, that's what I meant. I am no good at medical terminology. Thanks for clarification!

littlemaybaby · September 2012

I was pressured strongly for a c-section because of how large I was measuring. I declined and and my 9lb 10oz son came out with 25 minutes of pushing. I was a terrified mess. I swear his head came out, he started crying, and instead of feeling this amazing relief, I just begged for them to tell me his shoulders weren't stuck. (They were not.) Shoulder dystocia is no joke, but many big babies are born fine, and some babies who are not perceived as that large can have shoulder problems with a smaller pelvis. It's so hard to predict, and there is NOTHING wrong with choosing a c-section for this risk. BUT make sure it's not completely fear based - you are smart, do your research and make whatever decision feels best to you.

CnAnA · September 2012

Thank you guys again for your input. It really means a lot to me! I am doing a lot of research...well, I'm googling like a mad woman anyway. There is just so much information both ways.

Most of what I'm finding about obese women ending up with c-sections is the debate on whether or not it's the doc's fault. One side says docs don't give fat girls a chance to let their body do their thing, and one side says the fetus is in distress from being in labor so long, the labor had stalled out, etc.

My husband is conflicted as well, and says he has no right to be making this decision. D'oh! Big help he is. LOL He's concerned about the safety of delivery of future children as well. Valid point. Dang him and his logic.

So, basically the only decision I have come to is this: I need to have a heart to heart with my doctor. He understands that I'm somewhat neurotic about this pregngancy, so I doubt he will be surprised to hear that I'm somewhat neurotic about the delivery options as well.

damabo80 · September 2012

Ask your dr what she recommends. I figure they went to medical school and have the experience to back it up.

To me, that stuff trumps any "personal" feelings on the matter.

Ive had two c sections. Not my personal preference, but more upon the advice of my dr. I would have liked to have had that "honey my water just broke" or "let's time my contractions" moment, but it is what it is. I have two babies that are here and healthy. I have my health, I consider it a win.

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