"maybe you'll be lucky"

Re: "maybe you'll be lucky"

• ajatmont13 member

  September 2012

  I completely understand your frustration on those types of comments.  My family has always been very health concious and the first thing my grandma said when she found out was to tell me she only gained 10 lbs with my father.  I just looked at her and said my doctor told me to gain about 25-30 lbs and I'm sure I'll have no problems getting healthy after. 

   It blows my mind what people say to pregnant women.  No one would comment on my weight prior to my pregnancy and it shouldn't be any different now. 

   
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• mamasmurf12 member

  September 2012

  I totally sympathize! A couple of weeks ago I was excited that I had stayed under 10 lbs (I'm about at 10 now). W/ DD, I had gained 10lbs by 12wks...so needless to say I was proud I had kept it down more this time. I told my mom and she said "Well you know, you don't have to gain ANY!"....um it's NORMAL to gain some, Mom!

  
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  "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?...But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:26-27&33-34

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• shipsshoessealingwax member

  September 2012

  I know these comments are frustrating, but try to remember the people giving them come from another time. Recommendations change all the time, and were different when they were pregnant.
  
  Most of them probably know that at some level you are freaked out by the changes to your body during pregnancy, including weight gain, and are trying to be supportive. Like all pregnancy advice, take it with a grain of salt and listen to your OB.

  

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• mseeyore6380 member

  September 2012

  It's got to be a generational thing because my aunt who's in her 80's is the same. She absolutely loves to remind you all the time that the most weight she ever gained with any of her 4 pregnancies was 2 pounds- yes 2 pounds. She thinks this is completely normal. The worst thing is this women was a nurse so she should have known better. It's not like she had any weight to spare either since she's barely 100lbs and extremely weight conscious- to the point most of the family was worried she had an eating disorder. 

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• lemonadepink

  September 2012

  Wow.  I am perfectly happy gaining my midwife-recommended 30-35 pounds.

  

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• sararn2004

  September 2012

  mseeyore6380:

  It's got to be a generational thing because my aunt who's in her 80's is the same. She absolutely loves to remind you all the time that the most weight she ever gained with any of her 4 pregnancies was 2 pounds- yes 2 pounds. She thinks this is completely normal. The worst thing is this women was a nurse so she should have known better. It's not like she had any weight to spare either since she's barely 100lbs and extremely weight conscious- to the point most of the family was worried she had an eating disorder. 

  My grandmother was a nurse too. I think either they didn't have as much knowledge on the subject back then or the RN's weren't as well trained on the subject as they are now, b/c I'm an RN and even though I don't work perinatal I know I'd rather gain slightly more than recommended than deprive my child of needed nutrients.

  

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• ggatlanta member

  September 2012

  Really any discussion of weight other than, "WOW, you look amazing, so healthy!" is uncool - with pregnant women or any woman really. Or any person. I mean, who wants to share their weight? If someone asked me, even my dad, I would say, "You are so sweet to want to make sure we're healthy - I can't bring myself to share my weight gain, except to say our doctor assures us that baby and I are growing fine!" After all, that's what they really want to know, moreso than a number.

  To be fair to your mom, this could be a generational thing. Back in the day my grandmother went to a doctor who was very strict on weight. She said keeping the weight gain under ten pounds (his limit!) was the hardest thing she's ever done. Of course, that was in 1950 (probably too long ago for your mom!), but maybe your mom had an old school doctor herself...
  

  

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• WinterBenson member

  September 2012

  I tried on a pair of pregnancy scrubs for work. THEY WERE GIGANTIC! I thought I should order larges, since I take large in greys anatomy scrubs. NOT THE CASE! They were sooo big for me. Then my mom comes in and goes, oh you'll fit into that pretty soon! I'm like WHAT?! Are you crazy??? Shes like Well, I gained 60 lbs with you. I'm like, um, NO. And walked out. Seriously. you should see these scrubs. I would honelstly have to gain 100 lbs and grow about 6 inches taller to fit into them. She still doesn't get the idea that she totally insulted me. I'm not a small person, but I'm very muscular, and I don't look like what I weigh, but I'll be darned if I gain 60 lbs!  

  

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