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Please tell me this is normal behavior??

dmndsr4evadmndsr4eva member
in Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months

My son will be three in December.  At this point and for a while now I can count on him crying and throwing a fit about every hour that I am with him.  A little background his dad and I split when he was 1.5 years old so his life is very hectic.  He goes to his Dad's on Wednesdays which involves an 1.5 hour car ride (some of which is full of fits and crying).  And goes with his Dad every other weekend.  The days he is not with his dad he is at a montessori preschool.  I work about 32 hours a week so I try to pick him up as early as I can on my days.  But I know this life isn't ideal for a developing toddler.  His life lacks stability and routine at times so I hope this explains the crazy behavior.  Developmentally he is doing well.  He has a large vocabulary and is learning all the things for his age like ABC's, numbers, potty training etc. 

But I had read an article on Babble a few weeks ago that frequent tantrums and especially ones that involve hitting and kicking aren't really normal.  I'm not sure if she meant when he gets a little older though? Because right now everything is a tantrum/battle.  He doesn't want to eat so he throws his food on the floor.  He doesn't want to change his clothes so he kicks and hits and cries.  Usually the tantrums don't last long but the next one is always right around the corner.

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Re: Please tell me this is normal behavior??

  • rlyttlerlyttle member
    I'm not sure what's exactly normal for a 3 year old, but I know lots of people struggle with that age. How does he act with his Dad? I would try to work with his father to come up with similar discipline strategies so maybe some consistency there will help. Stay strong and don't give into the tantrums, hopefully it's just the age. 
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  • rosesandpeoniesrosesandpeonies member

    first of all Babble is not a good source for medical information.  

    Second of all this is the time that they start doing expressing their independence and I am sure with all of the changes in his life it is probably compounding it.

    It is actually good he is in school because that is routine and that is stability even though he is not with you.

    I would talk to his pedi about some ideas to help relieve some of his stress and work with his tantrums, but just  know most kids this age are like this to some degree :)

    Good Luck with everything. 

    DD (8/12/09), DD (2/8/11)
    BFP 12/16/14| EDD 8/19/15 |MMC 1/15/15 (9 weeks 1 day)
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  • rosesandpeoniesrosesandpeonies member

    I want to add that my 3 year old has been really tough lately herself.  I love her so much, but she is trying my patience daily and fighting with her sister.  3 has been worse than 2.

    so I really think most of it is age related.  It started for my daughter a few months before turning 3. 

    DD (8/12/09), DD (2/8/11)
    BFP 12/16/14| EDD 8/19/15 |MMC 1/15/15 (9 weeks 1 day)
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  • animalcrckersanimalcrckers member
    imagerosesandpeonies:

    I want to add that my 3 year old has been really tough lately herself.  I love her so much, but she is trying my patience daily and fighting with her sister.  3 has been worse than 2.

    so I really think most of it is age related.  It started for my daughter a few months before turning 3. 

    i just wanted to say i agree with all this. 3 is DEFINITELY worse than 2. no one told me that until my daughter started behaving insanely and then my sister said "oh no one told you it gets worse at 3??" I would say its probably age related and totally "normal" but it SUCKS. stay consistent and try to have patience. i feel like now DD#1 is getting much better. she's better able to express how she's feeling with talking to me and not having a complete meltdown.
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  • MyBeanieBabyMyBeanieBaby member

    Nooo... please don't say it gets worse at 3. My barely 2 year old is almost unbearable right now as it is. :(

    I hope it's not true for all!

    I'm not sure about 3 year olds but seeing all of my friends little ones at around 3, it seems they all had hitting tantrums so it sounds normal. :)

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  • dmndsr4evadmndsr4eva member
    Thanks everyone.  I guess it isn't abnormal.  Lord give me patience.  I guess I need to work a lot more on discipline and boundries.  And picking my battles. 
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